Chapter 1487 At that time, I was willing
Seeing her silent expression, Zhu Feng slowly leaned over, put his hand on her cheek, and said in a hoarse voice: "Nan Yan, you——"
“…”
"Why didn't you tell me?"
“…”
A hint of smile seemed to pass across Nan Yan's face, and she looked at her calmly.
Although she didn't say a word, the faint smile in the corners of her eyes and eyebrows was clearly visible. She seemed to be saying: So what if I told you?
Zhu Feng's throat, which originally felt like it was being burned by fire, was now even drier and more uncomfortable.
yes.
So what?
As a royal concubine, she knew what the consequences of her crimes would be.
Since she had already confessed such a "crime" in public at such a grand occasion as the Great Altar Sacrifice, she had already made up her mind to die. What happened afterwards, for someone who was not even afraid of death, was nothing?
She doesn't care at all.
But the more he understood this, the more uncomfortable Zhu Feng felt.
Just now he felt like being pricked by needles, but now, it felt like a blunt knife was cutting his heart bit by bit.
There were no wounds and no blood.
However, the pain was so unbearable for him, a man who had fought on the battlefield for many years and suffered countless injuries.
but--
His mind was full, but he was only thinking about one thing.
How painful was she at that time?
Thinking of this, he almost wanted to grab Nan Yan's hand, but he had just let go of that hand and put it back into the quilt. Now, she didn't have to warm it up herself.
On the contrary, I seem to have the world in my hands, but I can't even grasp what I want to grasp.
My fingertips were so cold that they seemed to be frozen.
Zhu Feng was silent for a long time, looking into Nan Yan's eyes: "Have you ever regretted it?"
Nan Yan looked up at him.
regret?
Have you ever regretted it?
Perhaps even Nan Yan herself had thought about this question countless times, but every time she tested herself, the answer she got was the same.
She said calmly, "No."
“……!”
Zhu Feng's heart skipped a beat.
Nan Yan then said calmly: "At that time, I was willing."
“……!”
Zhu Feng's breath hitched again.
At that time... were you willing...?
At that time...
Zhu Feng looked at her thin, pale, yet stubborn face. The helplessness he had always felt in her now spread throughout his body.
After an unknown amount of time, Zhu Feng asked in a hoarse voice, "At that time, I was willing."
“…”
"What now?"
“…”
Nan Yan didn't say anything, but slowly raised her head and looked at him, her eyes so calm that there was not even a trace of fluctuation.
But Zhu Feng's heart seemed to be thrown into the cold seabed by a huge wave.
Nan Yan didn't say anything because she had already answered, but at this moment, she couldn't say the words.
Why ask?
The look in her eyes said it all.
Yeah, why ask?
She was still with him, and she wasn't going anywhere—she couldn't go anywhere else.
She still looks the same as before.
However, there is one thing that is different.
She would no longer be the Si Nanyan who would do anything for him, even disregarding her life and death. She would no longer have no regrets and no hesitation towards him.
She was still his imperial concubine, but she was no longer his Si Nanyan.
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