Chapter 39: You are still alive, don’t talk about death casually
This day was the day of the terrorist attack in Paris. Yu Di said that she couldn't contact her boyfriend and was so anxious that she couldn't sleep all night. She was also injured and sprained her ankle. She walked with a limp and collapsed on the sofa and started to call him, but the call didn't go through and she didn't say a word.
The TV and cell phones were flooded with news reports, with the death toll in the hundreds. Yu Di sat on the sofa, making a phone call. Li Wenjing, not known for comforting others, spent most of her time sitting next to her, trying to soothe her. Gu Weiyi called the Paris police, the embassy, the hospital...anything relevant. Finally, through a friend who worked at a hospital, she found the confirmed death list, over fifty people. When it was sent to her, Gu Weiyi, holding her phone, checked each person's identity one by one. She didn't see her target, so she shook her head at Li Wenjing, and she breathed a sigh of relief.
"Don't think too much. It's so chaotic out there right now. Maybe... he just can't contact you right away. You're injured too, so rest first."
Li Wenjing persuaded her to go back to her room and sleep. Gu Weiyi sent Li Wenjing to work. Instead of taking a car, he helped her carry her bag. The two walked side by side on the coastal greenway. At the equator, Mombasa's winter was as warm as spring. The sun shone on the green coconut trees, making them shiny. It seemed that this place had never had a rainy day. People on the street wore colorful short-sleeved shirts and rolled up their long sleeves on their arms. On the beach, seven or eight shirtless children were playing football, and the sweat on their dark skin sparkled like waves.
The two sat on the bench where they had gone for their last morning run. There was a tall coconut tree above their heads, and the sea breeze rustled like human laughter. Gu Weiyi came over with bread and two cups of coffee.
"You're injured too, you should stay home and rest. Is work so urgent?"
"When problems arise with such an important project, an accident report must be written. But the owner took the initiative to take on this arduous task. Now, apart from me, I think no one in our company cares, and we don't want to get involved in work that doesn't belong to us. Yes, we're just doing the work, and we shouldn't ask about things that aren't our business. But if they don't clarify what went wrong with the project at hand, they might blame the earthquake this time, but who will they blame next time an accident occurs?"
Li Wenjing felt a headache and leaned back on the bench. "Actually, I don't want to stay home. If you leave, what if something really happens to her boyfriend? I can't handle it alone."
"You should rest for a while. You're too nervous. Nothing will happen." Gu Weiyi raised his hand from behind her and supported her head slightly. "How are you going to work?"
"I reported it to my superiors first. If they disagreed, I sent it to the Kenyan government and the French company's headquarters. I don't believe no one will take action."
"I'll help you with French reports and phone calls to people in Paris, like today."
Li Wenjing leaned closer to him and said, "I want to thank you on behalf of Yu Di. She was so sad that she didn't even say thank you."
"It's okay. Paris is in such chaos right now. I can understand her. I was worried when I was checking the list, too, afraid her boyfriend might be on it. Europe, Asia, Africa...there's no peace anywhere. There are wars and deaths every day. I often doubt myself. Being a doctor can't actually save many lives. People are pretty stupid, slaughtering their own kind in the most cruel way."
"Maybe it's because there are too many people. When there are too many people, there are fewer resources. The rich get more, and the poor get less," Li Wenjing chuckled, then sighed. "There's a saying that goes, 'The gap between people is greater than the gap between people and dogs.' It's not certain that rich and poor are the same. Isn't it the same here? Europeans, Americans, and white people come here to travel, and many of them organize group activities. They see the locals like animals in a zoo, and they give them a little bit of self-satisfaction, like a reward, and they think they've done a lot of good."
Gu Weiyi turned sideways and looked at her, his eyes as transparent as the sea water, always revealing a sense of sadness.
"I understand. You think we're too arrogant, treating their poverty as a 'landscape' and not really helping them."
"I don't know what you mean. I just remember that our school used to have university students come to teach because they could get scholarships and some would guarantee them a place in graduate school. They came to teach for a while and then left again. I didn't like it at first, but then I got used to it. They came whenever they wanted, and at least they really taught us something, which was much better than our local teachers."
"So, you don't object? Even if it's arrogant?"
"Things in society are inherently complicated. Whether it's cold rice or hot rice, as long as I can help others, I'm happy. As long as I can survive, I don't mind whether it's cold rice or a big meal." Li Wenjing said with a smile, "The key is this: I have to learn to survive. I can't always rely on others for cold rice. If they stop giving it to me one day, I'll starve to death."
This "old rice theory" made him laugh, "I get it, you are a pragmatist."
"What about you? More ideal?"
"There are a lot of things I can't figure out. I always feel like I've tried my best, but nothing has been accomplished. I guess I'm just doing good things with bad intentions..."
As he was speaking, his cell phone rang again. His face turned pale. He said that his friend had sent him a new long list. They both looked at the phone together. When they saw Brother Feng's name, Li Wenjing read it several times. His heart was beating heavily and felt like it was sinking in his body.
"Don't tell Yu Di yet."
"It has happened, and she needs to know."
Gu Weiyi was about to make a phone call when she leaned towards him and pressed Gu Weiyi's hand with the plaster. Her arm started to hurt again. She held him tightly and took several deep breaths.
"Don't worry about it, you don't understand, don't talk about such things."
"Death is inevitable."
At the mention of "death," his face suddenly turned cold, like a fish that had been dead for a long time, numbly watching the world's death. Li Wenjing, as if stung by his words, shouted at him in a vexed and unreasonable manner, "What if I die?"
"You are still alive, don't talk about death casually!"
His voice grew excited, and he took her hand. Just as his other hand approached her cheek, she glared and dropped it. Li Wenjing said, "That's it. You can tell Yu Di that her boyfriend is gone without any psychological burden. It's like a doctor announcing a death to a family member. Don't do that. It's too cruel."
"I'm sorry, I..."
He wanted to refute a few more words, but tears were already falling from Li Wenjing's eyes. He stopped talking and helped wipe her tears.
"I can't tell it alone. I'll go to work first and talk to my colleagues. We can figure out how to tell her together." She finally said to him and stood up.
Li Wenjing's attitude was firm, so Gu Weiyi had to put down his phone and send her to work. Seeing her coming back to work, her office colleagues came to greet her. Zhang Zhaochuan walked in front, followed by six colleagues. They asked her why she came to work without taking a rest, and were concerned about her injuries. They also said that everyone had planned to visit her and Yu Di tonight. The fruit basket and flowers were ready and placed next to the office water dispenser, a red basket and white flowers. After a while, the director heard the commotion and came over. They surrounded her and asked her all kinds of questions. It was Gu Weiyi who said that Li Wenjing needed to rest, and blocked everyone's overly "concerned" gazes and let her sit back at her workstation. She felt like a stone was pressing on her heart, and she couldn't speak. When others asked her, she could only say "hmm" twice. Gu Weiyi was the one who dealt with them about her health. They asked Gu Weiyi to have dinner together, and he was speechless for a moment. Li Wenjing then explained that he had work to do later and would not be here all the time, so she turned it down for him.
"Look at everyone, so enthusiastic! If you have work to do, go ahead," Zhang Zhaochuan said. "Finish it quickly and come back to be with Wenjing sooner. I've always said you two are a good match. You should give me a matchmaking fee for your marriage..."
There was another round of laughter. Gu Weiyi blushed and kept waving his hands, saying "No, no." They were still joking. Li Wenjing said coldly, "Yu Di's boyfriend is gone today. Let's think of a way to explain it."
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