I was distracted throughout my second son's funeral.
He was obviously such a healthy man. Even if he injured his leg later, his physical foundation was still there. How could he just die like that?
Or maybe he fell off the bed and died. This is outrageous no matter how you look at it.
But if you ask me what's so outrageous about this, I can't. Do you want me to suspect that my second brother's wife or his children deliberately killed the second child?
How is that possible?
If the second brother dies, his wife will become a widow, and the children will be fatherless. I would never suspect them.
Was it really just an accident?
I feel sad, especially sad. My dad asked me to take good care of them. The third and fourth child don't need my care. The only one who needs my care is the second child, and I am completely unable to do anything about it.
When no one was around, I got drunk and was about to fall asleep when I heard two brothers from the tribe talking.
"Isn't Qingbai's departure too cowardly?"
"When has he stopped being a coward? Hasn't he always been a coward?"
"After all, they are brothers from the same clan. Give them some face."
"Does he need others to save face for him? He has already lost all his dignity and respect."
"That's right. He went to Lame Liu's house to gamble for free. I heard that he gambled away all the money his wife worked so hard to earn. When has our clan ever produced such a loser?"
"Not only that, isn't there a widow at Old Zhang's house at the head of the village? She became a widow not long after she got married. I heard Qingbai stayed overnight at her house."
"What? Will his wife agree? You don't even care about this?"
"How can your wife control you? I heard that because of this, someone saw him beating his wife."
Finally, one of the brothers came to the conclusion, "Qingbai's death was not unjust. He gambled, drank, and slept with widows. His body must have been hollowed out a long time ago. No wonder he died after falling off the bed. Take this as a warning."
After saying that, they all dispersed.
Although I drank too much, my mind became clearer the more I drank. After listening to what I heard, I felt more and more that I had not done enough as a big brother. Qingbai had actually started to go astray a long time ago, but I neglected to pay attention to him and did not notice it at all.
No matter how hard times get, life must go on.
I felt very uncomfortable during that time. I was afraid that my second son's wife would remarry and leave, and I was also worried that she would not be able to raise two children if she stayed.
After work, I always tell my wife to visit my second brother's house more often, and if my fourth brother's wife can help or speak up for him, she should also say good things about her.
My wife rolled her eyes at me and said that my fourth brother's wife wouldn't use just anyone. If Zhang Xiangyun was really a decent person, my fourth brother's wife would have used her without us saying anything.
I was a little nervous and asked her, "Wife, what do you think of my second brother's wife?"
I originally thought that she would complain about a lot of bad things about my second brother and sister-in-law, and then we would work together to find out their advantages.
But she didn't. My wife is indeed the kindest one.
She said: "I think my second sister-in-law is very good, down-to-earth and hardworking, very careful and patient with the two children, and never speaks ill of us sisters-in-law behind our backs. Although she did do many unpleasant things in the past, that's all in the past. To use the words of my fourth sister-in-law, it is a great honor to admit one's mistakes and improve. I think my second sister-in-law is kind!"
It turns out that everyone is kind in the hearts of kind people.
From time to time, I would ask my wife to accompany me to help my second brother and his wife with some chores like fetching water and chopping firewood.
I didn't dare to visit her alone. She is a widow now, and there are many gossips about widows. What's more, she is my eldest uncle. There have been many rumors about my eldest uncle and his wife over the years, and I have heard a lot of them. So I have to nip these nonsense in the bud.
It's already difficult for my second brother and his wife to raise two children, and I can't help them and end up causing enmity.
Later, when we learned that my second brother's wife could also make money from my fourth brother's wife, my husband and I felt much better.
Life was very peaceful after that. My wife was busy making money and I was busy working to earn work points. When I got home, we had a happy married life, although she always said that I was sometimes too energetic.
But isn't this a compliment to me? Which man doesn't like to hear such words? I even work harder after she says this.
When my fourth brother and his wife left to develop in other places, I saw my wife hesitated. I knew what she was hesitating about, and I felt anxious too.
Why am I so nervous? I'm afraid that after she goes out with my fourth brother's wife and sees too much of the world, she will no longer look down on me. What should I do?
I can't live without her!
So one night after she fell asleep, I ran to the main room alone and sat there for most of the night in thin clothes.
I am in great health on weekdays, but for the first time ever I caught a cold. I kept coughing, had a runny nose, and felt dizzy.
I was already feeling sad, and on top of that I was not feeling well. I was extremely emotional during those two days, and I felt like crying even with my nose blocked.
I said to my wife, "Wife, if you want to go with them, go ahead. I can't hinder your future. As long as you come back to see me occasionally when you are free, I will be satisfied."
No one taught me these words, but I just feel that this will help me keep my wife.
Sure enough, she hugged me with tears and snot, saying that she would not leave and that she would be wherever I was.
I feel like I'm really despicable, but as long as my wife is by my side, it doesn't seem to matter if I'm a little bit despicable.
The good news is that my wife didn't die that time, but the bad news was that a few years later I injured my waist. The doctor said I had recovered and I was no different from a normal person whether walking or doing anything, but I couldn't do heavy work for a long time.
This means that I won’t be able to get a full work score in the future, and I may need to pay special attention to my waist when exercising in bed.
I am still so young, and my wife is at the prime of her sexual life. Suddenly, she injured her waist. I have completely lost my dignity as a man.
I was depressed for a while after that incident.
Then suddenly one day my wife said she wanted to take me to Suicheng for a trip, saying that I had been feeling depressed since I was injured, and wanted to take me out to relax.
That's such a far place by train. If she hadn't made money, with the money I earned from working like that, I would never have been able to go out and play whenever I wanted like I do now, even if I worked my entire life.
When I first started going out with her, I was actually feeling very depressed.
I even had the idea that she wanted to go out and take a look, and then leave me behind to develop her own career.
I was in a very low mood during that period.
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