Going home to visit relatives
The next morning, clutching the palace exit token given to me by the Empress Dowager Xian and carrying a cloth bag full of herbs and amulets, I hurried towards the palace gate. The token was a warm jade pendant, engraved with the four characters "Palace Pass," and it felt warm in my hand, as if carrying the warmth of everyone in the Cold Palace. Just as I stepped out of the palace gate, I saw a blue cloth carriage stopped by the roadside. The driver was a kind-looking middle-aged man who quickly bowed upon seeing me: "Are you Miss Tian? I was sent by Miss Qin Lan to take you back to the Tian family in the suburbs."
The carriage bumped along for half an hour before finally stopping in front of a small courtyard made of blue bricks. A string of dried red chilies hung on the gate, and several wintersweet bushes bloomed vibrantly at the base of the wall. As soon as I alighted, a woman in a coarse cotton-padded jacket ran out of the house, her temples dusted with flour, the wrinkles around her eyes crinkling with laughter—it was Tian Zhao's mother, Wang Shuzhen. This woman, who embodied the virtues of "virtuous and upright," had managed all the household affairs for twenty years without fail. Behind her followed a man in a faded long gown, ink stains on his fingertips, a bamboo bookmark clipped to his cuff, and a tightly clutched copy of the folded pages of *The Literary Mind and the Carving of Dragons*—it was Tian Zhao's father, Tian Mingyuan, who had rushed back from the Hanlin Academy during his day off.
"Zhao'er! You're finally back!" Mother grabbed my hand, the warmth of her palm seeping through the cloth bag, carrying the sweet scent of flour. "Come inside quickly, Auntie left you some hot sweet potato porridge and your favorite locust flower cakes, made from dried locust flowers that your brother Zhu specially brought back from town." Father also stepped forward, placing a wooden comb in my hand, his voice a little hoarse: "Zhao'er, this is a wooden comb Daddy made for you, see if it fits." The comb was polished smooth, with a small locust flower carved on the back.
Once inside, I saw my brother Tian Zhao, Tian Ming, sitting at the table. He was wearing a blue long robe with ink stains on the cuffs. He had a handsome face and gentle eyes. He smiled and stood up when he saw me: "Little sister is back. Please sit down. I just put away my brush and ink and was waiting to show you my new calligraphy." He was a scholar who passed the imperial examination last year and now teaches at a private school in town. He was calm and composed, but always seemed like a child who never grew up. When he saw me, he kept asking me about things in the palace.
I sat on the edge of the kang (a heated brick bed), drinking the sweet potato porridge my mother handed me. The sweet aroma slid down my throat and into my stomach, warming my eyes. My mother sat beside me, picking up locust flower cakes for me while carefully examining me: "Zhao'er, have you lost weight in the palace? Your complexion isn't as rosy as before. Have you been wronged?" My father sat opposite me, not saying a word, but keeping adding food to my bowl, his eyes full of worry.
I put down my bowl, untied the purse from my waist, and placed it on the table. "Father, Mother, Brother," I said, "I didn't suffer any injustice in the palace. I even met many kind people." I slowly recounted my experiences in the Cold Palace to them—how the Virtuous Consort gently taught me to read, how Consort Su taught me to identify herbs, how Consort Rong secretly embroidered amulets for me, and the stories of Consort Li and Consort Hui, as well as Qin Lan's care. I deliberately omitted the incident of the Empress sending people to cause trouble, only mentioning the warm things, so as not to worry them.
“And then there’s Ya Huan, a very lively girl. She always comes with me to deliver meals and even taught me how to weave grasshoppers.” I said with a smile, taking out the grasshoppers Ya Huan had woven from my cloth bag. “Look, this is what she woven. Doesn’t it look real?” Tian Ming took the grasshoppers and nodded with a smile. “They’re so exquisitely woven. We’re relieved that our little sister has such friends in the palace.” Mother wiped her eyes and whispered, “That’s good, that’s good. I was just worried that you’d be all alone in the palace, with no one to take care of you.”
Father suddenly stood up and took a wooden box from the inner room. Inside were neatly stacked copper coins and a slightly worn silver hairpin. "Zhao'er," he said, "this is the money your brother saved from teaching, and it's also a silver hairpin your mother had when she was young. Take it back to the palace and buy some good food. Don't always think about saving money." I quickly declined, but Aunt Wang pressed my hand down. "Listen to me, take it! It's not easy for you in the palace, and I can't help you much. You can't refuse this." I looked at the copper coins and silver hairpin in the wooden box, my fingertips trembling slightly. I could only nod and accept them—this was the heavy concern of my family.
The next morning, I tucked the copper coins my family had given me into my pocket and headed towards town. Thinking of everyone's preferences in the Cold Palace, my steps became lighter. I first went to the embroidery shop on the street corner and picked out two bolts of light pink and pale blue embroidery thread for Consort Rong—she always loved embroidering flowers and plants, and these two colors were perfect for springtime peach blossoms and orchids. The shopkeeper smiled and said, "Young lady, you have excellent taste. These two bolts of thread are newly arrived; the colors are perfect, and the embroidered patterns will be vibrant."
Then they went to the pastry shop and bought two boxes of pine nut cake for Consort Xian—her teeth weren't good, and the soft pine nut cake suited her taste perfectly; they brought a bag of osmanthus sugar for Consort Su, who always said that osmanthus flowers are most fragrant in autumn and can be made into sugar to last until winter; they picked out jujube paste pastries from an old shop in the west of the city for Consort Li, as Consort Hui had said that this was Consort Li's favorite flavor in the past; they bought a bag of sesame candy for Ya Huan, who always talked about wanting to eat something sweet; and finally, they brought a box of mung bean cake for Qin Lan, who had once said that she loved to eat refreshing snacks in the summer.
Passing by a herbal medicine shop, I remembered that Consort Su had mentioned that Consort Rong occasionally caught a cold, so I bought some dried honeysuckle, which can calm the nerves and treat minor colds. I also bought a new wooden comb for my mother at a comb shop, with winter plum blossoms carved on the back—she always said that winter plum blossoms are cold-resistant; I picked out a bamboo pen case for my father, as he always likes to carry his pen in his pocket, and a pen case would make things more convenient; and I bought Tian Ming a new collection of poems, as he always says that there are too few poetry collections in the town's bookstores.
As I walked home, carrying my overflowing paper bags, I passed a stall selling candied hawthorns. I suddenly remembered Ya Huan always saying the candied hawthorns in the palace weren't sweet enough, so I bought two skewers, wrapped them in oil paper—perfect for bringing them back to her. The stall owner, a kind old man, smiled and said, "Young lady, you're so kind. Buying so many things must be for your family and close friends, right?" I nodded, my heart filled with warmth—yes, the people in the Cold Palace were already my family and friends.
When I got home, Mother was packing my luggage for my return to the palace, filling a cloth bag with freshly baked locust flower pancakes: "Zhao'er, take this back with you, let your friends in the palace try it. My cooking skills aren't great, but the ingredients are clean." Tian Ming also put the new poetry collection into my bag: "Sister, take this poetry collection with you. If you get bored in the palace, read the poems to relieve your boredom." Father quietly slipped the bag of copper coins into my pocket: "Zhao'er, don't deprive yourself. If you need money, just send a message home. Father can also earn some money by writing letters for others."
As evening fell, I boarded the carriage back to the palace, carrying a cloth bag filled with my family's concerns and gifts. Outside the carriage window, the setting sun painted the sky orange-red, and the Tian family's small courtyard with its blue bricks gradually shrank, leaving a deep warmth in my heart.
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