Su Yan was discharged from the hospital earlier than Shen Muzhi.
On the morning of her discharge, Xin Zikai came to pack her things.
Su Yan told Xin Zikai to wait for her in the car while she went to check on Shen Muzhi.
Xin Zikai adjusted her hat and told her to hurry back.
Su Yan entered Shen Muzhi's hospital room and saw Shen Muzhi gazing out the window, seemingly lost in thought.
"Mu Zhi." Su Yan walked to Shen Mu Zhi's bedside, called softly, and asked, "What are you looking at?"
“Look at the sunshine, the sun is shining brightly outside.” Shen Muzhi answered calmly, slowly turning his gaze to Su Yan. Seeing that she had changed into her usual clothes and looked alright, he asked, “Are you being discharged from the hospital today?”
“Yes.” Su Yan sat down on the chair in front of the bed, looked at Shen Muzhi’s face, and said, “You look very unwell, you need to take good care of yourself.”
"Yes, I know." Shen Muzhi replied calmly, noticing that Su Yan was indeed much better than she had been a few months ago.
Back then, she seemed afraid that her old friends would see her like this. She was so self-conscious that she always kept her head down. Now, she can look them in the eye and has a smile on her face. Perhaps the miracle of life has made her see things in a new light.
"Mu Zhi." Su Yan smiled faintly, her gaze falling on Shen Mu Zhi's face, yet seemingly drifting far away, and she sighed softly, "We seem to have grown quite estranged."
"You've become distant from me, haven't you?" Shen Muzhi remembered that she never used to call him Muzhi; she always called him "wooden wooden."
"No, it's because you started to drift apart that I stepped back to my current position." Su Yan shook her head and said with a faint smile, "You know I'm very sensitive to the closeness or distance between people."
“I…” Shen Muzhi wanted to explain, but then felt that there was nothing to explain.
"You don't need to say it, I understand." Su Yan's expression was very calm, and she sighed softly, "Eleven years have passed between us, which is really a long time. No matter how familiar we were before, things have changed."
Shen Muzhi lowered his eyes, his thumb unconsciously stroking the ring on his ring finger, and he responded softly, "Yes, things have changed."
Su Yan noticed this small detail of his, pursed her lips, and suddenly said, "I'm sorry."
“This is not your fault.” Shen Muzhi shook his head. It was his indecisiveness and his lack of honesty that hurt Xiang Zhilan’s heart and made her leave without a second thought.
“It was my fault. I told Zikai about Xiang Zhilan’s background and the bone marrow matching. I knew Zikai would definitely ask you for help. I think I wanted to know if your feelings for me were still there.” Su Yan’s eyes were slightly red as she said, “It wasn’t just to test your feelings. Actually, there was also the fact that I was unwilling to let that person’s daughter be happy.”
Shen Muzhi's eyes flickered slightly as he looked at Su Yan's face and asked in a low voice, "What does this mean?"
“When my dad was lucid, he told me about my mom and Xiang Zhilan’s father. Back then, Xiang Zhilan’s father used his power to coerce them. In order to save my dad’s career, my mom went to be with that man and was forced to get pregnant and was not allowed to have an abortion. Later, that man got his comeuppance and died in a car accident. But my mom was too far along in her pregnancy to have an abortion, so she had to give birth to the child.”
But this child remained a thorn in their hearts, so they had their three-day-old baby abandoned. Even after the child was thrown away, my parents' relationship was already shrouded in shadow. My mother felt unclean and could no longer be with my father. My father, foolishly, in an attempt to make my mother feel they were equals, slept with Su Yan's mother. He told my mother that this way they would be the same, and neither of them should hold a grudge against the other.
"She was absolutely stupid." After saying this long string of words, Su Yan forced a smile. "It's a pity my mother didn't get over those traumas. She suffered from postpartum depression and her health gradually weakened, but she didn't die of illness."
"Didn't die of illness?" Shen Muzhi raised an eyebrow slightly, somewhat surprised.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
