Chapter 39: When they met again, it turned out that he no longer remembered her. ...
Why are humans always fascinated by summer? Perhaps it is because many beautiful stories are hidden in the invincible summer.
Even though I experienced countless summers later, they were just counterfeits of that summer.
This moment is no exception.
The raindrops fell on the umbrella with crackling sounds.
Through the hazy mist, Bo Xia recalled the many details of her youth. For a moment, she felt as if the rain that had begun in adolescence had continued to this day, and he was still the one holding an umbrella for her as she passed by.
Fate always gives them a brief intersection, and then pushes them to two different places.
He sat in the car, heading off in an unknown direction, while she, leaving her girlish recollection behind, walked out into the rain. Just like when he went abroad and she was accepted into Kyoto University to study architecture, they had mistakenly thought their dreams had come true, only to lose touch with each other.
She looked towards the end of the rain curtain, thinking that if it weren't for today's encounter, she would have almost forgotten him, and also almost forgotten her former quiet but enthusiastic self.
The bitterness in her heart took a long time to fade away. Her fingertips gripping the umbrella handle tightened, and after a long time, a moist smile slowly seeped out of her eyes.
Later, after being baptized by the plum rain, she placed the umbrella in a corner of the room.
The resignation process hadn't gone smoothly. The manager had initially assumed she was just throwing a tantrum, but when he realized Bo Xia was actually going along with him, he was completely reluctant. With Bo Xia's resume, staying here was a waste of talent, and he knew better than anyone else what was going on.
But in the end, no one could change Bo Xia's determination.
Taking advantage of her free time, she went to stay in an ancient village near Nan'an for a few days. The village was quiet and leisurely, and the air was fresh, which made her feel relaxed.
After a rain, she walked out of the house to relax and saw the graceful lotus leaves in the pond not far away reflecting a lush green.
Following a few tourists, Bo Xia saw a small fish trapped in a pool of water under a lotus leaf, unable to escape from that world.
She lowered her head to examine it, and suddenly her heart felt like it was struck hard. The fish, blown onto the lotus leaf by the wind and rain, could never have imagined that with a single leap, leaving the water it depended on for survival, it would be able to enter a wider world.
Bo Xia couldn't help but wonder if she was also trapped in an environment that she dared not leave at this moment, but it was the things she relied on that trapped her the most.
When she was young, she thought that the college entrance examination was the starting point, and that she only needed to leave the city to start a new life. She thought that as long as she went to a farther place, she could escape completely.
If her youth were a book, no author would be willing to write about the gap between her ideals and reality that she discovered after entering society, about her discovery that blood ties are an unbreakable bond, or about her mental breakdown when she discovered that her parents did not love her after she had convinced herself countless times.
Only after witnessing the cruelty of the world and hating her parents while feeling sorry for them did she finally give in and bow her head. She returned from Beijing to Nan'an and tried to find a job in this small place. But she didn't even realize that she was back in the same cage.
She has been so confused in the past two years.
Bo Xia thought that she was probably the trapped fish.
Only when she has the courage to face death can she escape from that predicament; otherwise, she can only struggle towards a slow death.
While she was lost in thought, a local woman living next door struck up a conversation with her. The woman also had a daughter around her age, and they'd been having a wonderful time chatting. So, speaking in her local accent, she invited her over, "Come over to my place for dinner later."
Bo Xia refused repeatedly, but finally couldn't resist the other party's enthusiastic invitation.
There are vegetables planted in the yard, and a big persimmon tree grows behind it. The aunt told her that the persimmon tree looks best in autumn. She didn't know how many tourists came to take pictures.
Bo Xia stared at it for a long time, imagining what it would look like in autumn. Halfway through her meal, she received a call. Seeing the familiar number on it gave her a bad feeling. As expected, she answered the call and heard angry questions.
"Have you quit that job?"
Because the head of the other company knew her father, the news got back so quickly. Bo Xia held the phone a little further away and said, "Hmm."
"Come back here now, you hear me..."
Bo Xia no longer wanted to hear what was said afterwards.
After she hung up the phone, her aunt asked her what happened and whether she had quarreled with her mother. The kind-looking woman held her hand and said, "All parents in the world want the best for their children, but sometimes they use the wrong methods."
Bo Xia did not refute and said yes with a smile.
Everyone's experiences and past are different, so who would understand? For her, parental love is like a damp quilt. It is difficult for you to leave this thing to survive the winter, but you can't really rely on this quilt to keep warm.
Bo Xia finally returned home.
That dinner wasn't peaceful; my mother lost her temper, and my father's silence supported her. It was always like this: one controlled her, passing on all the injustices and sufferings he'd suffered in life to her, while the other remained silent.
Sometimes she would think that if all she could do was pass on her bad emotions to her children, she would never have children.
"It's so hard to find a job, and you just quit if you want to. What's wrong with that job? The salary is a little lower, but it's very stable. It's not worse than what you can get in Beijing. I originally thought that I would go on a blind date when your job stabilized, but now it's different..."
She listened quietly for a while, but because she did not fight back, she was subjected to mental attacks from her parents again and again, just like she had experienced in the past.
In her life, had she ever been treated as a real daughter? The elder sister who was like a mother, the adult of the family, the designated daughter-in-law of someone else's family?
At seventeen, I thought the past was just a temporary dampness, but now I realize that it was an ocean that is difficult to cross.
Before today, she had thought about accepting her fate.
So in order to ease her mental state that was on the verge of collapse, she resigned from her job in Beijing and went home to rest. She chose to work nearby despite her mother's repeated nagging, and even thought about just letting it go and finding someone to marry.
But what appeared in front of her at this moment was Jin Yunyan's face.
At that moment, she suddenly remembered how stubborn she was when she wanted to stand shoulder to shoulder with him at the age of seventeen, how high-spirited she was when she wanted to apply for the Department of Architecture, and how she smiled when her parents scolded her when she received the admission letter after the college entrance examination.
Her youth was bright and dazzling because she was rebelling and pursuing at that time.
Unlike now, it is dilapidated and miserable.
Bo Xia was very calm, even scary.
The noises around him continued, and Bo Xia suddenly said, "I'm going back to Beijing."
As soon as the words came out, it was like a huge bomb exploding with a "boom".
Bo Xia has been an obedient child since she was young, but her parents found that she was like a kite with its string cut, becoming increasingly uncontrollable, especially when it came to major life events, she would make decisions that surprised others.
"Have you grown wings? How can you be so heartless? What's the point of us raising you if you run so far away?"
Bo Xia only remembered a huge argument with them, in which her mother pointed at the door and said, "If you have the guts, leave now and never come back." But her mother had forgotten that she was no longer the child who had to bow down to everything due to lack of financial resources. She didn't compromise like she had in her childhood and went upstairs to pack her things neatly.
Before turning around, she saw the umbrella in the corner and picked it up after a long silence.
Her father came to stop her and asked her why she was angry with her mother.
When she was a child, she thought she was not alone in this family. It was only much later that she realized that silence was not a reflection of fairness. Even if he didn't speak, he would always agree with his wife.
Bo Xia knew that she would always be independent of everyone else and that she did not belong here.
"Dad," she looked at him for a long time, a slight smile on her lips, "No need to send me off."
No one had expected such a peaceful farewell, and no one knew why this family, which once seemed warm and beautiful with loving father and filial son, would one day have a crack.
On the flight to Beijing, Bo Xia had a very long dream.
She dreamed that she did not miss the last time she saw Jin Yunyan that day. She sat in the corner of the box in silence, and only mustered up the courage to walk up to him when the show was about to end.
She didn't send him a greeting card, but told him in person -
"Jin Yunyan, I wish you a bright future."
The tall boy in the dream bent down and touched her head, his tone gentle: "You too."
Then, in her hazy dream, his figure slowly faded, becoming the distant profile of that day. She dreamed of him walking slowly towards her with an umbrella, his slender figure immersed in the mist, and asking her how she had been these years.
She shook her head, then nodded.
When she woke up, there were still traces of tears in the corners of her eyes. Bo Xia got up and went to the bathroom to wash her face. She looked up at the moist and gentle eyes in the mirror, as if she saw herself when she was eighteen years old.
The torrential rain couldn't hold back her at seventeen, so would it hold back her at twenty-eight? She still had to burn wetly, still had to cross that endless sea.
After Bo Xia got off the plane that night, she never looked back.
The cell phone rang, and her senior brother called her. When she resigned previously, the other party intended to recruit her into his firm, but at that time, Bo Xia was in a very bad mental state after suffering setbacks in the workplace. She was on the verge of collapse and said that she needed to rest.
Now that he knew she had returned to Beijing, Meng Xubai immediately invited her to join the company.
After Bo Xia put down her luggage, she arrived at the agreed-upon rooftop restaurant. Meng Xubai politely pulled out a chair for her and said, "You've just arrived in Beijing and haven't found a place to stay yet, right? I have a vacant house in the Second Ring Road. I'll take you there."
She joked, "Are you giving me an advance on my salary? I can't afford to spend ahead of schedule with my current financial situation."
After pulling and tugging for a long time, Bo Xia refused to give in at all, and Meng Xubai couldn't force her. He knew that his junior sister looked gentle but was actually a stubborn person at heart. Once she made a decision, no one could change it, so he just let it go.
He simply placed the cut steak in front of her and asked her one last question: "Are you leaving again after coming back this time?"
Bo Xia was stunned for a while, then looked out the window at the bustling city at night. This was the place she had longed for since she was a child. Even though she knew that this city was cruel and lonely, she nodded and spoke after a while.
"I'm not leaving."
Her solemn eyes were reflected in the red wine glass, and then everything disappeared in a flash.
She was wearing a red dress that she would never wear normally. The smile on her lips was bold and full of vitality, as if she had been reborn.
Two months later, Beijing entered the end of summer.
Bo Xia has completely adapted to the new working environment. When she went in to make a report, Meng Xubai asked her to prepare in the evening and go have dinner with him and a few bigwigs so that they could familiarize themselves with each other in advance and discuss cooperation in the future.
In addition to being useful for work exchanges, this kind of dinner party is also for expanding personal connections. In recent years, the development of the construction industry has been on a downward trend. If they don't have their own channels to wait for orders to fall from the sky or the so-called "fair competition", I'm afraid their firm will be close to closing down.
Although the location of the agreed club is not remote, it is a bit difficult to find. After seeing the panoramic view, one can't help but sigh that there is such a quiet corner in the bustling city, which has a sense of peace and quiet in the hustle and bustle.
Out of professional habit, Bo Xia always observed the design of the building. It must be said that the design of this building is particularly elegant and simple, maintaining the advantages of modern architecture while also having a classical charm.
They arrived a little early and heard that the real big shots had not arrived yet.
Bo Xia felt the air in the box was too stuffy, so she stepped out for some fresh air. In the courtyard stood a patch of elegant bamboo, rustling as the hot wind blew past.
She heard a noise coming from afar, and looked up to see several people standing in the distance talking. The man in the middle had a tall and straight figure, and wore a white shirt with a dignified and unrestrained posture. Although there was a faint smile in his eyes, he looked rather cold and unapproachable.
She was slightly startled, her eyes following the familiar face closely.
The last time was not the last time they met.
How big is Beijing? What is the probability that she and Jin Yunyan will meet again here?
Bo Xia watched greedily, as if it were just a fragile dream. In the dream, she could only hold on to the short time, waiting for the moment to wake up.
She thought it would be good if she could see him again.
Seeing him getting closer and closer to her, she wondered if he would suddenly recognize her and greet her. She imagined his eyes, imagined his opening remarks...but none of this happened. After passing her, the man didn't even look at her and went straight into the box.
She smelled a faint scent on him, which was no longer the mint scent of his youth. After standing there in a daze for a few seconds, she realized that the box he entered was the one she had just come out of.
When he came in, Jin Yunyan was sitting in a high seat, and everyone around him was flattering him. He always had a dull expression, probably because he came from a prominent family and was used to being the center of attention.
His edges are much sharper than when he was young, the only thing that remains unchanged is his gentle eyes that cannot accommodate anyone.
The people next to him talked to him, but he responded in a gentlemanly and nonchalant manner.
His voice is now clearly heard.
Bo Xia's first reaction was—his voice was like this. She had liked him for so long, and they had been apart for so long that she couldn't even remember his voice.
Bo Xia came to his senses and realized that Meng Xubai was talking to him. He introduced him to Jin Yunyan: "This is Bo Xia, an excellent architect from our firm."
She thought that she had fantasized about meeting him again for many years. Now she stood in front of him more mature, beautiful and confident than before. She actually felt like she was giving an answer to her past self.
So, is she satisfied?
Are you satisfied, seventeen-year-old Bo Xia?
She didn't respond. The man placed his hands on his crossed legs, cast a kind yet oppressive gaze at her, and uttered unfamiliar words from his thin lips: "Miss Bo?"
Bo Xia's heart skipped a beat.
That look, which seemed gentle but carried aloofness and coldness, was the look one would give to a complete stranger.
Bo Xia knew she had changed so much over the years that even Wen Xin said she looked like she'd had plastic surgery. She'd taken care of her skin and worked out, and shed her rigid hairstyle and clothes. Not only was her face different, but even her aura was completely different.
But it is impossible for someone who is familiar with her not to recognize her, not to mention that he already knows her name, so how could he not connect her with the person in his memory?
Bo Xia raised her eyes and saw only confusion in Jin Yunyan's eyes. He did not blame her, but waited patiently for her response.
She looked into those deep eyes again and again, trying to find some sign that the other person knew her, but she failed in the end.
It turned out that he no longer remembered her.
Bo Xia lowered his eyes. Perhaps throughout his entire high school years, he had never really remembered her name.
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