Chapter 17, Section 17: "Uncle, work for me."...
Bai Ji walked leisurely down the stairs from the other side, passing through the bustling crowd, and headed towards Yan Xingli.
To attend the party, Yan Xingli, who usually wears casual sportswear at home, specially changed into a sharp suit.
The tailor-made suit perfectly showcased his physique, highlighting his long legs, wasp waist, and upright posture, with his full and sexy chest muscles visible beneath his shirt.
Handsome men are always prone to arousing the jealousy of other men.
Bai Ji gritted his teeth and cursed the pretty boy in his heart.
He straightened his back, feeling fortunate that he was well-prepared, and stood tall with his head held high, wearing seven-centimeter height-increasing insoles.
Finally, they arrived at a distance of only a few steps from Yan Xingli.
Bai Ji stopped and looked at him with a half-smile.
Yan Xingli frowned slightly.
Bai Ji slowly curved her lips into a slight smile, waiting for the other person to speak first.
To everyone's surprise, Yan Xingli merely glanced at him indifferently before looking away and brushing past him without a word.
Bai Ji was stunned, and it took him several seconds to realize he was losing face.
He turned around angrily: "Yan Xingli, can't you see me?"
Yan Xingli stopped in his tracks, and within a few seconds he made a judgment.
He turned around and said coldly, "Sorry, I don't sign autographs for haters."
Bai Ji: "???"
Who asked for his autograph!
"You don't recognize me?" The other person's tone was full of disbelief, and a hint of anger.
Yan Xingli: "I don't know him."
Bai Ji stepped forward, hands in his pockets, his eyes scanning him up and down, his voice cold and sarcastic:
"No wonder so many people want to be big stars now. It turns out that if you become a big star, you can be arrogant and completely cut ties with your past."
What's going on here? Are they filming a drama??
[This is hilarious! These haters have even gone offline to follow their idols. Wow, that's some serious initiative!]
Yan Xingli has a face blindness problem. He treats people who are not with him day and night, even if he has met them two or three times, as strangers.
Furthermore, this person's appearance is completely unremarkable.
Even when dressed in expensive haute couture, he couldn't hide his sleazy and vulgar demeanor, making even fine clothes look like cheap knock-offs.
Having worked in the entertainment industry, Yan Xingli possessed a knack for reading people.
Since the other party had ill intentions, he wouldn't be polite.
"Come on, take a picture of him. He's the one who said it all. I didn't say anything."
Yan Xingli faced the photographer, raising his hands with a determined and innocent expression, trying to distance himself from the situation.
"I don't know what this guy is doing, he just started shooting randomly. If anyone knows him, please introduce him in the comments. By the way, if you're going to criticize him, please don't criticize me."
The photographer reacted incredibly quickly, pointing a close-up shot at Bai Ji.
Bai Ji's eyelids twitched, and he was about to rebuke her when his mind reacted first.
His purpose in approaching Yan Xingli was to expose his true colors, and the more screen time he gave him, the better.
Bai Ji reluctantly suppressed his anger, smiled slightly, and softened his tone, saying:
"You still love to joke around, just like before."
"Although you interfered in my relationship with my fiancée when we were in college, so many years have passed, and I no longer care."
"You don't need to be so tense like a cat seeing a mouse, relax."
A dozing netizen suddenly opened their eyes wide, exclaiming in surprise at the national treasure while slacking off at work.
Interference?!
One stone stirs up a thousand waves, the barrage of questions fills the screen, wow, this is huge news, they won't be sleepy if you talk about this.
Did Yan Xingli do something like this in college? Nothing is more refreshing than listening to gossip.
Yan Xingli himself was completely dumbfounded. Had he stolen someone else's girlfriend?
He lived a very simple life in college, either working, attending classes, and going back to his dorm to sleep after class. He didn't even participate in many clubs. Who did he steal from?
You can't admit to doing something you didn't do.
Who is your fiancée?
Yan Xingli replied coldly, "I've never been in a relationship."
Bai Ji had anticipated that he wouldn't admit it. He sighed softly, like a great saint who had been cheated on but gladly forgave, radiating light.
"You're terrible. You've even forgotten her name. Perhaps after listening to this poem, you'll know who she is."
Bai Ji started with zero frames, reciting a passage of English poetry in a clear and resonant voice.
It openly and subtly satirizes him as heartless and ungrateful, a petty man who has achieved success, a modern-day Chen Shimei (a notorious figure in Chinese folklore known for abandoning his wife), and at the end, it slips in its own personal opinion, calling him a stinking rat from the gutter.
Why did it suddenly start chanting?
[Haha, buddy, did you learn your trade from that glamorous female celebrity's ugly husband who never comes home?]
Ah, Zuo Men~
Hello, this is a reality show, not a poetry recitation. Please turn left to exit.
[This spoken English is really good, it's so pleasant to listen to.]
The poem contained obscure vocabulary and consisted entirely of long, difficult-to-understand sentences. Bai Ji was certain that Yan Xingli, with his elementary school level of understanding, would absolutely not be able to comprehend it.
The situation seemed to be just as he had predicted.
Yan Xingli remained silent, his face so gloomy it seemed to drip water.
Bai Ji's smile deepened, and sure enough, his mind went blank, leaving him speechless and unable to respond.
"uncle."
Yan Xingli's trouser leg was gently tugged. He looked down, and Qi Youyu waved the lollipop in her hand at him.
Yan Xingli's sharp gaze softened involuntarily.
"My uncle won't eat it."
"You peel it for me."
"……good."
Yan Xingli obediently peeled the lollipop and fed it to the child.
Bai Ji, left standing to the side, sneered at the sight, thinking that he was born to serve others.
Yan Xingli's ears twitched. He calmly pinched the child's chubby cheek and leaned down to say:
"Fish, let's play a game. Uncle will cover your ears for five minutes."
"If you can stay still, your uncle will reward you with a big meal."
With a lollipop in her mouth, Yu Yu nodded vigorously and leaned her ear closer: "Let's begin now."
"good."
Yan Xingli covered Yu Yu's ears with his thick hands, and all the surrounding noise disappeared instantly.
Qi Youyu snuggled up to her uncle's leg, twisting the little stick of a lollipop around in her hand, unlocking a new way to enjoy candy.
The hunt begins—
If someone uses foul language in a live stream, the moderators will censor it, but if he speaks foreign languages fast and witty enough, the moderators won't be able to keep up.
Yan Xingli gathered his strength and spoke, "I'll f*** you, you son of a bitch!" (Zhongyuan Yayin)
After opening his speech, Nakahara Ya-on greeted Bai Ji warmly in fluent London English, then criticized his storytelling ability in French, and finally concluded in Spanish and Russian.
You big idiot!
Bai Ji was stunned, his smile completely vanished. That accent, that vocabulary, and that fluency... it's impossible to reach that level without living abroad for more than ten years!
He had practically worn out Yan Xingli's information; he had absolutely no experience studying abroad!
The comments section went completely wild.
Although I don't know what he recited, that guy's parents must have flown away for a while now.
Did he take a breath in between? If not, I was just thinking something passed through my mind.
[Yan Xingli, honestly confess, how many foreign teachers did you eat? Did you eat them as meals?!]
[So being a hater has these advantages? Ahhhhh, please scold me, please scold me, please scold me in five languages!]
[His British accent when he opened his mouth immediately reminded me of Downton Abbey. Wow, even my tutor couldn't pronounce that aristocratic accent, and he did it so effortlessly!]
"You, you—"
"Didn't you understand?" Yan Xingli mocked, leaning close. "If Shakespeare knew you recited his poems like that, he'd be furious and slap you across the face."
"You should read more books when you have time."
Bai Ji's face turned pale and then red, and he trembled with anger. All his sense of superiority and his carefully prepared sarcasm were shattered at this moment.
After his perfect counterattack, Yan Xingli ignored Bai Ji and, amidst the astonished gazes of all the guests, took Qi Youyu's hand and turned to leave.
The live stream recorded the entire process of this crushing defeat.
At the same time, the hashtag for Yan Xingli's angry confrontation with haters in his live stream topped the trending search list, and his impromptu foreign language "speech" clip caused a sensation across the internet.
【Wait, I just got off my night shift, what happened??? How did Yan Xingli become a five-language war god?】
[It's obviously fake! It's obvious without even thinking that this is a whitewashing tactic by Yan Xingli's team. They deliberately hired a shill to act, treating netizens like fools.]
—Yan Xingli's two college entrance examination scores!
Just as netizens were discussing it intensely, the biggest marketing account in the industry revealed Yan Xingli's two college entrance examination score reports, and everyone then realized that he had taken the college entrance examination twice.
Previously, his first college entrance exam score was the subject of widespread ridicule.
He underperformed in his first college entrance exam, failing English and math. He then repeated a year and successfully entered university on his second attempt.
We are all ordinary people; geniuses are extremely rare. The label of "incompetent fool" attached to him was torn off overnight.
Netizens know perfectly well that someone who can verbally abuse others in five languages is no fool.
*
The phone in his pocket kept vibrating, but Yan Xingli seemed oblivious to it and showed no intention of looking at it.
Before losing their jobs, working people always feel sad and melancholy for a while.
He might feel good about being foul-mouthed for a while, but he'll probably be kicked off the show after today.
What a day that was both brilliant and dark.
Yan Xingli secretly plotted how to raise 200 million yuan in breach of contract fees. He calculated and calculated, but even after emptying his pockets, he still couldn't come up with 200 million yuan.
Sigh, I guess I'll have to borrow some from Yan Shanyi.
Knowing that the end result of working is selling oneself into slavery, he wouldn't have let others have the chance. Selling himself to Yan Shanyi would at least allow him to slack off a bit.
"Uncle, what's wrong?" Qi Youyu, who was hanging around his neck, hugged his head and leaned close to his ear with concern.
Yan Xingli gently pushed the child's hand up and said with a hint of sadness, "Yuyu, your uncle might be going to lose his job."
"Oh, what does unemployment mean?"
"It means losing your job."
Qi Youyu: "This is a good thing."
What's worse than being unemployed is paying to work, and unfortunately, Yan Xingli has fallen victim to both.
The compensation money left them so poor they couldn't even afford underwear; all their hard work over the past few years had been for nothing.
Yu Yu, separated by a three-hundred-year generation gap, didn't understand why her uncle was so keen on working. She gave Yan Xingli a look that said, "I really can't do anything about you."
"Uncle, do you really enjoy working?"
Uncle, a hamster who loves saving money: "Working makes me happy."
“Then you can work for me,” Yu Yu said. “I’ll pay you every day.”
Oh dear, it's still daily pay.
Yan Xingli asked with great interest, "So how much will you pay me per day?"
Two hundred yuan.
That's equivalent to 6,000 yuan a month, which is very reasonable. These days, college students are like cabbages, and they can't even earn 3,000 yuan a month.
“Okay.” Yan Xingli feigned being touched. “I’ll come and stay with Boss Yu Yu once my uncle loses his job.”
This flattery hit the nail on the head.
The child grabbed his ears and shook his head happily: "Boss Fish, I'm a boss now, hehe."
She wants to exchange a lot of Earth's worth of money to pay her uncle's wages!
When they got home, the TV was showing "Empresses in the Palace," and surprisingly, Xiao Hua didn't come to greet them.
It paced anxiously around the living room, muttering to itself:
"He's just a man, how could he have so many wives?"
"Unbelievable! So many underage girls are among his wives! This is illegal!"
"Oh, poor children, how can I save you?"
Compared to modern dramas, the two little aliens prefer watching period dramas, but they are often made to question their existence by the unrealistic plots.
Yan Xingli touched the television and found it was quite hot.
"You've been looking at this for a while, take a break, clear your head, don't let everything get into your brain."
The small green mechanical eye was somewhat dim, yet Yan Xingli could still feel a sense of powerlessness from it, as if he couldn't reach into the screen with his palm.
"Yes, I need to calm down for a while."
Yan Xingli asked Qi Youyu, "Is it okay for it to be like this? Does it need psychological counseling?"
A robot watching a human palace drama and spotting a circuit malfunction—I wonder if that counts as a workplace injury.
Yu Yu picked up the tablet: "Little Flower is very strong; it has a powerful mechanical heart."
Yan Xingli ignored it, picked up his phone and glanced at it; it was full of missed calls from Li Zhi.
After much deliberation, I sent a brief WeChat message, then went back to playing dead, deciding to deal with everything after the live stream ended.
When Li Zhi received Yan Xingli's message, he had already arrived at the airport and was about to board the plane.
[Hahahaha, Yu Yu's uncle, turn around quickly! Yu Yu is doing something big behind your back!]
A barrage of comments, eager for a good show, scrolled by. Amidst much anticipation, Yan Xingli, as if struck by a sudden inspiration, walked over to the sofa and sat down. Upon turning his head, his pupils dilated in shock.
Ugh, so many men who flirt with the law! Showing off their abs, showing off their pecs, what kind of behavior is this!
Fishy's speed in liking posts was as fast as when she was reviewing imperial edicts.
Isn't this setting a bad example for children?
"You're not allowed to look at these!" Yan Xingli slammed the tablet shut.
The busybody who reviews countless official documents: oo
"Why, Uncle?"
Yan Xingli's face was contorted with rage, like a distraught old father whose daughter had been abducted by a blond-haired scoundrel.
“Who in their right mind would dress like that?” he gritted his teeth. “It’ll give you a sty and nightmares.”
Qi Youyu pressed for details: "Uncle, are you a decent person?"
"Of course I am."
The child had seen a video of her uncle practicing martial arts shirtless in a TV series, and she extracted fragments of her uncle's character from her "I like" list:
"My uncle isn't wearing any clothes either."
Yan Xingli retorted, "It's different. This is a professional necessity for me, and besides, your uncle has abs. What I'm wearing represents art."
Qi Youyu's eyes lit up: "What kind of chicken is 'Fuji'? Why did it take you so long to tell me?"
"..."
Tsk, what a foodie.
Yan Xingli pointed to his stomach.
The belly is also called a rooster belly.
One more knowledge point.
Yu Yu understood immediately, and with a thud, she lifted her clothes to reveal her chubby round belly, patting it twice: "Uncle, look, I have abs too."
Yan Xingli's face twitched, and he quickly pulled down the child's clothes, scolding him with a stern face: "Where would a child get abs?"
"You can't just show your body to anyone, not even your uncle."
For the first time, Yan Xingli realized how difficult it was to take care of a child, especially for a man taking care of a baby girl; there were so many inconveniences.
For example, sometimes after Yu Yu finishes taking a shower, she will come up to him and let him wipe her face. No matter how well he takes care of his hands, they are never as delicate as a woman's hands.
The child's skin was delicate, and he often hurt her.
—Never reflected on the fact that the problem lay with their own methods.
At night, Yu Yu lay comfortably in bed while Yan Xingli sat by the bed massaging her feet. The child's chubby little feet were soft and elastic, and holding them in her hands felt like holding a stress-relieving toy.
Qi Youyu fiddled with her personal terminal.
She accumulated a lot of emotions at the party today, and her brain's energy increased from 10% to 20%.
Xiaohua is right, the more people there are, the more emotional energy there is.
The child was full of anticipation, waiting for her brain to accumulate 60% energy so she could call her parents.
The grandfather and granddaughter were both distracted, but it didn't delay their work at all. After massaging Yu Yu's feet, Yan Xingli skillfully patted Yu Yu's back to lull her to sleep.
The child, still half asleep, rolled over and mumbled, "Uncle, can you please stop hitting me?"
"I want to sleep."
Banquet Star Ceremony: ...
*
In a wealthy villa area.
—Queen's Cloak User Manual
[This is called "sheng kong". Say to your neck, "Please switch to flight mode", and you can fly!]
[You could also say fly higher, fly lower, O(∩_∩)O]
The crooked and childish handwriting is easily recognizable as coming from a child.
Xiao Fu held the instruction manual and flipped through the Chinese and English dictionaries for a long time before looking up with a blank expression.
Mixing English and Chinese makes my head spin QAQ
Having no other choice, Xiao Fu took a picture of the birthday card and sent it to her Chinese teacher for help.
Xiao Fu's Chinese teacher thought it was written by a student and praised her for her rapid progress, then went on to break down the meaning of each word.
After listening to the teacher's explanation, Xiao Fu immediately began to recite the incantation, albeit haltingly, according to the phonetic symbols the teacher had given her.
The cloak was silent.
"Chinese is too difficult," Xiao Fu thought. "It must be because I didn't pronounce it well that the cloak didn't react."
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