"A mental constraint?" Chang Le asked dejectedly. "I don't know."
She smiled bitterly and helplessly: "I know clearly that there is a bright path that will lead me to power and to walk alongside my family and friends. There are many people waiting for and hoping for me there. But I... I can hear people in my heart suffering, saying that they don't want to walk that path again, but they are bound by the ways of the world and follow in Fu Guang's footsteps."
"I clearly know everything, yet I can't see anything clearly anymore!" She covered her ears, her voice trembling slightly.
"I don't even know if what's sitting here right now is an empty shell carrying over three hundred years of memories, or a walking corpse that just moves mechanically!"
"I feel like I'm already dead... I've died many times..."
The accident killed Jiu Fang Chang Le's physical body;
When she herself left the seal, it was as if she had entered a world of natural misfortune, where pure white was wantonly painted. At that time, the remaining soul of the girl in the Green Vine Courtyard had also been killed.
Jiu Fanggui and Qi Qi took away the bright little princess, and Fu Guang took away Chang Le, who was striving for survival. So what still exists now?
As Chang Le's mind stirred, a notebook appeared in front of her.
It was the diary left behind by the "original owner". Opening the notebook, there was only one page that read "I am Chang Le". After that, the pages that were originally blank had been filled with several more pages. She called them "Chaotic Notes".
...
"Every night when I fall asleep, I can smell the stench of my own decay."
...
What will the weather be like tomorrow?
The night is so long…
...
"I will never see tomorrow."
...
"I know
I have been dead for many years.
...
"It hurts so much! It hurts so much!"
I can't breathe...
...
"Shen Fuguang! Please, please!"
Please save me! I'm dying!!
"Why didn't you come to save me! Why didn't you come! Why didn't you come?"
...
"I can't see the sun... no, I dare not look at the sun..."
...
"sometimes,
I suddenly feel like reaching out to the sky.
But I didn't know I was praying.
It's a cry for help.
It feels like suffocation.
Or is it just a way to prove that they're still alive?
...
I often dream of it, and often wake up startled.
"Unable to distinguish between dreams and reality"
...
He suddenly reached out, his fingertips landing on the words in the notebook, pointing to the word "reality," while obscuring the words in front of it.
He said:
"Truth is relative. Being trapped in the fog and still constantly seeking proof in your own heart will only increase your confusion. You might as well look outward. If everything around you is real, and the reality around you is real in itself, then you are now the reality, you are reality, you are the end of the past and the beginning of the future."
Chang Le's eyes still held a hint of fear and confusion.
He opened his palm to her: "Want to see the reality around you?"
Chang Le curled his fingers twice, then finally unfolded them and placed them in His palm.
The mysterious space around us suddenly rippled like water, transforming into a screen that projected scenes from beyond this world.
Chang Le looked over.
She saw Kurei Merkelins, dressed in a short skirt and high heels, as always, in the European-style palace castle, exuding a cold and noble aura.
She was selecting jewelry from a display by the maid while listening to her assistant's report.
After the assistant finished reporting, he asked her to make a decision: "The federal councilors are urging the Lord to make a decision as soon as possible, because you have spent the longest time in the Middle Kingdom and know the most about the matter of integration, so the Lord would like to hear your opinion."
Kulei threw down the necklace and said irritably, "I already made things clear to my older sister!"
"My stance is clear! Integration? My Merklins family doesn't care! If the Meli Federation wants to cause trouble, don't drag our family into it! Trying to use the Merklins against District Nine? Go eat shit!"
"Tell him to get lost!" Kulei waved his hand impatiently and turned back to continue selecting jewelry.
The assistant was not surprised by her reaction at all and withdrew.
Kulei saw an emerald necklace, stroked his chin and chuckled, "Green, huh? This color suits my Lele the best!"
Then, remembering something, she opened the communication, and Raymond appeared on the screen.
The burly Raymond was in his kitchen, wearing an apron, surrounded by cozy decorations. On the windowsill behind him was a row of handmade dolls, all made by Raymond himself.
"Leilei, they came to my house again. I told my older sister to turn them away! Your family has to hold on too!"
Raymond scratched his head and mumbled an "Mmm": "I'll try my best to persuade my brother."
Kulei glared: "No, you still need to persuade them? You're actually considering it? Does your family have no brains? You're even willing to be their pawns?"
Raymond's face was serious: "If you can't persuade my brother, I'll... I'll run away from home! I'll join you guys!"
"Ah~ As expected of our Leilei!" Kulei smiled.
Her smile was radiant, and even the cold screen couldn't hide her burning passion.
The image became blurry, then the scene changed.
In the middle of the long street, there was a building with the words "District 6 · Tongyang Hunting Guild" written on it. Li Jie, who was shirtless, was walking into the building with one hand in front of him and the other hand holding a bloodstained long stick.
"Hey! The mad monk's back again? Why are you empty-handed?" some fellow union members said, their tone half teasing and half mocking.
Li Jie nodded politely and replied earnestly, "Ah, you're back. I didn't receive any missions, so I came empty-handed. How about you 'voluntarily' give me two missions? My staff hasn't had enough to eat."
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