Chapter 15 answers, "This child cannot be kept."
Mingying was restless and stiffened into a stone. She watched the fireworks rise into the sky, but no roaring sound came for a long time.
The clinic wasn't cold, yet people could freeze inside.
She subconsciously touched her lower abdomen, feeling both strange and frightened.
It's been two months.
Upon reflection, she realized that her period had indeed been absent for two months.
Ever since she hid in the lake for one night while delivering a message, her menstrual cycle has become irregular. In the past two years, Pei Xiaoyun has found some medicine for her, so it hasn't caused her much pain.
She's been drinking the contraceptive decoction all along.
Her thoughts suddenly turned back to the morning when she vomited the contraceptive soup because of stomach discomfort.
It took her almost half an hour to drink the second bowl of medicine, perhaps because of the long interval, which allowed her to take advantage of the situation.
The yin and yang were out of sync.
She had fantasized more than once about how wonderful it would be to have a child with him.
For her, this child was undoubtedly the first joyous event of the new year.
But……
Pei Xiaoyun is not married, so would he allow one of his concubines to get pregnant? If not, he wouldn't have made her drink contraceptive soup all the time.
She was at a loss for what to do, so she gave him ten coins and hurriedly left the clinic.
Once back at her residence, she dared not tell anyone.
Everything depends on Pei Xiaoyun's return from Shanxi.
"What illness did the doctor say you have?" Ling Shuang asked, still worried about her pale complexion.
Mingying hurriedly tried to cover it up: "The doctor said my cold was severe and prescribed medicine for me, which is why I drank it."
Such irregular matters must not be spread by her without her knowledge. She knows Pei Xiaoyun is cautious, and she imagines he would not want to make a fuss about it.
"Then you should go to sleep," Ling Shuang urged her.
Mingying lay on the couch, her heart filled with mixed feelings.
The arrival of this child seemed to disrupt all her thoughts, like a sudden shock, catching her completely off guard.
Looking at the dark and cramped little house, she thought about her identity again and again.
She had heard of maids in wealthy families who became pregnant before the mistress even entered the household. The mistress, favored by the master, would send the maid to the estate to give birth. After the mistress married, the maid would be brought back, and the child would still be legitimate.
This is the best path for her.
Another half month passed, and Pei Xiaoyun still hadn't returned.
Mingying's figure was still slender and petite, but she was feeling extremely unwell. However, a cold was not a long-term excuse, and she still had to do her job.
To avoid arousing suspicion, she forced herself to put on a thin layer of rouge to cover her haggard face.
That day, a banquet was held at the mansion, and she was dragged along to watch the excitement.
She and Ling Shuang stood on the bamboo path, peeking out. The warm pavilion was filled with women and girls adorned with jewels. In the center of the table was a water channel, with blue and white porcelain bowls and plates floating on the gurgling stream. It was truly elegant.
This flowing banquet was quite novel. She parted the bamboo leaves to take a closer look, when suddenly, she met a pair of bright and piercing eyes.
When those delicate and beautiful faces came into view, her heart skipped a beat, and she turned around in a panic.
It was Princess Jianing who came to visit our residence.
She sighed softly, thinking to herself that once the county princess entered the household, she would surely torment her to death.
She gently touched her flat stomach, a wave of worry washing over her, especially since she had committed such a serious taboo.
The more she thought about it, the more confused she became. Using the cold weather as an excuse, she went back alone.
There was an abandoned little Buddhist shrine in the back garden, which was always locked and no one ever went there, but now the door was slightly ajar.
As she passed by, she vaguely heard a few faint "hoho" sounds coming from inside.
Upon closer listening, it sounds like human voices.
Fortunately, it was broad daylight. She mustered her courage and pushed the door open. The scene before her made her hands and feet go cold.
A woman in purple, covered in blood, lay on her back on the ground, her blood soaking the dry straw beneath her.
The stench of blood was overwhelming, and she felt nauseous, bending over and dry heaving.
The woman on the ground stared with empty eyes, seemingly recognizing her, and said with a dry laugh, "It's you...you've come to laugh at me? I'm going to die anyway, so I'm not afraid of you laughing at me."
Mingying's eyes rippled with emotion. She realized the voice sounded familiar, so she leaned closer to look and recognized it as Yu Zhong's.
"Jade Bell..." she called out several times in disbelief.
She remembered that Yu Zhong had gone to the Second Master's room long ago. She had met her when she went to the main courtyard to get the New Year's wine on New Year's Eve. Yu Zhong was wearing gold and silver and seemed to be quite favored. How could she be so miserable now?
Yu Zhong's belly was swollen, and there was blood all over her body. As Ming Ying approached, her shoes were covered in sticky blood. "What happened to you?"
She had worked with Yu Zhong for a period of time. Although Yu Zhong was arrogant, his current appearance was truly terrifying.
"I'm pregnant with Second Master's child..." Yu Zhong was barely breathing, completely lacking her usual vigor. On her deathbed, she thought she would never see anyone again, but she never expected to see Ming Ying again.
“When Madam found out, she was afraid it would damage Second Master’s reputation, so she ordered someone to force-feed me an abortifacient.” She coughed painfully, blood trickling down her chin and neck. “I was healthy, and I didn’t miss a single dose of the medicine, but they… beat it off with sticks.”
Yu Zhong cried and shouted, her hoarse voice tugging at Ming Ying's heart. Before she knew it, tears were streaming down her face, and she tasted the salty bitterness in her mouth: "I'll go and beg Granny Lu at the gatehouse to find a doctor for you through the side gate."
Just as she was about to get up, her skirt was yanked hard.
Yu Zhong's bloodied hand gripped her skirt tightly: "You're so stupid. What am I? Nobody wants me to live anymore..."
"Doesn't Second Master dote on you? Why doesn't he care about you?" Mingying squatted down in front of her.
Yu Zhong gave a bitter laugh, staring blankly into the distance: "He's already tired of me and has taken in many new women."
A bone-chilling cold surged through Mingying's limbs in an instant.
She recalled how Yu Zhong had left so arrogantly, like a beautiful and bright flower, but now he lay here forlornly, like a withered petal, ignored by everyone.
However, it has only been a few months.
Yu Zhong's parched lips opened and closed repeatedly, as if she were using her last breath: "I used to target you in every way because the eldest master doted on you, and I couldn't stand you, so I followed the second master. But everyone in this mansion is cold-hearted and heartless, how much true affection do they have? I don't envy you at all anymore, I only hope that you won't follow in my footsteps and end up like me."
Her tragic appearance was reflected in Mingying's eyes, and she felt dizzy and her breath was cold.
She held the jade bell's hand until it gradually grew cold and fell down...
Her hands were stained with Yu Zhong's blood, a horrifying sight that left her mesmerized. Overwhelming fear gripped her neck, choking her until she collapsed to the ground, breathless.
With a loud "thud," the door to the small Buddhist shrine was pushed open.
Mingying turned her head and saw several tall servants walk in.
"Hurry up, the lady told us to take care of her so as not to offend our distinguished guest."
"Pah! What bad luck!"
When the men saw Mingying, they knew she was one of the master's men, and their expressions of disgust softened somewhat. "Oh, it's Miss Ming. What are you doing here? You should go back quickly. Someone has died; it's bad luck."
Seeing that the person on the ground was dead, they worked together to carry him away.
Yu Zhong's skirt slowly slipped from Ming Ying's palm, leaving a gruesome bloodstain on the ground.
She watched helplessly as the side gate opened a crack and a frail body was carried out.
Like willow catkins or withered leaves, they are humble and lowly. They are delicate and lovely when they are on the branches, but once they fall, they will not be remembered.
She sat in the small Buddhist hall until dusk before returning home, stumbling and falling several times along the way, her body and face covered in mud. As soon as she entered the house, she held a spittoon and spat, covering her mouth and nose as she cried silently.
That night, she had many bizarre and fantastical dreams.
She dreamt that Yu Zhong was covered in blood and reached out to her, begging her to save him. She was drenched in sweat and woke up many times, her palms bleeding from her fingernails.
She dreamt again that Pei Xiaoyun treated her the same way, leaving her alone in the small Buddhist hall. She pleaded desperately, but he walked away without looking back.
She leaned against the couch; it was raining outside, and the patter of the rain suppressed the fear in her heart.
She touched the bracelet he had given her on her wrist; its coolness seeped into her palm, making her feel much more at ease and secure.
He wouldn't be so heartless.
Second Master is Second Master; he is not the same as Second Master.
Moreover, on New Year's Eve, he told her that he hoped to have a child in the future.
Now it's here, isn't it?
When he comes back, she will tell him that he said he would like it.
She endured this for another half month, and one night she noticed that her lower abdomen had swelled up a little, but it was not noticeable to outsiders, and she could not reveal a word of it.
This was the longest Pei Xiaoyun had ever been away on business.
She counted down the days, hoping for his return while also fearing what she would do if he stayed away for half a year.
The back garden was to be renovated with a new pavilion, and all the maids were called to clean the flowers and plants.
After a long day of work, I returned to the courtyard and, just as I reached the hanging flower gate, I was surprised to see the sky blue.
Upon seeing her, Kong Qing said urgently, "Miss Ming, the master is back and has been looking for you everywhere."
Mingying's heart pounded, it felt like it was going to jump out of her throat, and finally she laughed from the bottom of her heart.
She rushed into the room to wash her hands, changed into a clean dress, brewed a pot of tea, and pushed open the door to the main room.
"Young master is back."
Pei Xiaoyun had just taken a bath and was wearing a moon-white robe. He was leaning over the table reading a book, looking as ethereal as a fairy in the breeze and moonlight.
He liked having someone wait on him as soon as he returned to the courtyard. Although he thought of Mingying on the way, she made him wait again, which inevitably made him feel a little dissatisfied.
He remained silent, waiting for her to come and serve him tea.
Mingying didn't notice his expression; she was happy as long as he was back.
She put down her teacup, stepped forward, and said in a trembling voice, "Young master, I've missed you."
Pei Xiaoyun was exhausted from the long journey, but hearing her gentle and warm words, her irritability dissipated somewhat. She looked up at her and saw that she, who usually didn't like to dress up, was wearing makeup today. Her skin was fair with a rosy glow, and her two dimples were bright and charming.
He didn't take the tea, but instead pulled her into his arms, his fingertips caressing her lips as he chuckled, "You knew I was coming back, so you dressed up especially for me?"
He had already slipped one hand under her skirt.
Mingying blushed and struggled, her slight resistance eliciting Pei Xiaoyun's displeasure: "What are you pretending for now? We haven't seen each other for so long, and you won't even let me have a proper look at you."
Mingying got off him and stood aside, looking embarrassed. She didn't know how to start the conversation. It was such an important matter, and she was inevitably nervous, especially since she wasn't sure what he meant.
"What's wrong? Are you feeling unwell?" Pei Xiaoyun asked, noticing her furrowed brows and hesitant expression.
Mingying shook her head, opening and closing her mouth several times.
These subtle movements did not escape Pei Xiaoyun's eyes. Over the years, he knew her inside and out. He thought of the time she went to Fuguang Lou without his permission, and his voice turned serious: "Is there something you're hiding from me?"
His words carried a slightly interrogative tone.
Mingying met his dark eyes, her heart skipped a beat, and she finally told him the secret she had kept to herself for so long: "Young master, after you left, I found out that I was pregnant."
The room fell silent for a while, with only the sandalwood incense burning in the burner.
"Are you serious?" Pei Xiaoyun snapped out of her surprise, her voice unreadable.
Mingying seemed to be stung by his indifference. She paused for a moment and could only nod truthfully: "It's been almost three months."
"Did you stop taking that medication?" he asked.
Nothing had happened before, so why is there any activity at this critical juncture?
Mingying stiffened and said nervously, "I was drinking it, but perhaps I wasn't feeling well that day and didn't drink it in time."
He wouldn't budge, so how could she dare to stop taking the medication? But by some twist of fate, things had already come to this; she was carrying his child, and he had said he would like it.
She kept this secret with bated breath, waiting for him to come back and tell her, so that she wouldn't be so afraid if he could share her burden.
"This servant has kept her mouth shut and dared not tell anyone."
"You did very well." Pei Xiaoyun took her hand, seemingly to comfort her, but his eyes were filled with gloom.
With those words from him, Mingying felt a great weight lifted from her shoulders.
He's back, and she finally has someone to rely on.
But the next moment, she heard his cold words again: "This child cannot be kept."
A note from the author:
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[Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands][Waving hands] Ten slaps
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