Before today, Yang Jia had always imagined that Li Bai's upbringing must have been quite glorious. Even though he had no friends, he must have been looked up to by everyone since childhood. She couldn't imagine that Li Bai's upbringing was actually like this.
According to Bai Ting, Li Bai's military service wasn't long, only a few years. But now, aside from being aloof and difficult to approach, she doesn't seem any different from ordinary people.
This was entirely due to her immense learning ability. Li Bai was indeed exceptional in every aspect. It was simply that her exceptional martial arts skills overshadowed her other talents. Of course, now that Yang Jia knew her story, he suspected that Li Bai might also have been hiding her own shortcomings.
Bai Ting said that Li Bai didn't care, but Yang Jia didn't think so.
From her narration, one can clearly hear her rejection and disgust towards everything behind the scenes. She has seen through these people's thoughts and may even have secretly planned to break away from them, but she is unable to do so at the moment, so she is holding back.
Yang Jia couldn't care less about her own emotional issues at this point. If she'd known Li Bai would say this, she might not have even broached the subject. While it seemed Li Bai had moved on from the past and didn't particularly care, it wasn't a pleasant experience after all.
"I should be the one to say sorry," Yang Jia said. "You're amazing, Li Bai. Really, I've never met anyone like you before. I..." She was a little confused, not knowing how to accurately convey her feelings at the moment. In the end, she could only say, "I'm sorry if my confession has embarrassed you."
Li Bai shook her head. She wasn't telling Yang Jia this to exclaim in wonder or sympathize with her. What she wanted to say was, "I'm an experiment. And, a flawed one at that."
The Li family had always believed the experiment was a success, that Li Bai was a perfect creation. Aside from her powerful ability not being able to persist, there were no flaws. However, Li Bai's ability to control it, and even without it being activated, was still powerful, making up for it.
Even this slight deficiency can actually be beneficial when presented to others. After all, if Li Bai had always been so powerful, it would naturally arouse suspicion and vigilance from others, as that behavior would be too "inhuman." However, Li Bai's current state makes everyone feel that she's still human, just a little more powerful, possessing a short burst of explosive power after undergoing some kind of transformation. This makes it much easier to accept.
But only Li Bai himself knew that it was not the case.
Her biggest flaw is not physical, but mental.
She struggled to consider herself a "human," and rarely had "human" emotions. When she first left the lab and joined the army, she didn't even consider her fellow soldiers to be her own kind, and she fought without hesitation, which led to the entire team being left with no one but her.
You have to know that it was just an ordinary task for new recruits. If the Li family hadn't suppressed the matter, it would have been enough to make Li Bai leave the army.
But Li Bai was very clever. She didn't realize it at first, but soon realized from the reactions of those around her that her approach was wrong, or at least not what they expected. Then she began to carefully imitate and learn, and gradually began to behave more and more like a real person.
But a year later, she had her own fixed team. Although she didn't get along well with her teammates, at least she had no problem cooperating with them.
Perhaps because this period of time was too short, even ordinary people need about the same amount of time to adapt after joining the army. So even if she had some abnormalities before, she was raised in a laboratory after all, and such fluctuations were normal, so it did not attract the attention of the higher-ups.
"But in fact, until now, it is difficult for me to feel the emotions you mentioned. I know joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness. I can also infer a person's current emotions from his behavior and then simulate them. But it's just imitation." Li Bai said, looking into Yang Jia's eyes.
Although she didn't say the rest of the sentence, Yang Jia already understood. She could learn and simulate many emotions, but it was difficult for her to simulate love. Or, even if she could, there was no need, or no desire, to deceive herself about it.
This is why she couldn't say sorry. It had nothing to do with emotions like liking or not. It was fundamentally impossible.
This answer was completely beyond Yang Jia's expectations, but it was also reasonable, because Li Bai's situation was indeed very special.
But… after hearing her explanation, Yang Jia didn't fall into depression or dejection. Instead, she felt a little excited. She asked Li Bai, "No one else knows about this, right?"
Li Bai nodded.
Yang Jia suppressed his emotions, walked forward a few steps, jumped up and sat down on the railing, leaning against the pillar and looking at her, "Look, Li Bai, why did you tell me this?"
Li Bai couldn't explain this question clearly. At that moment, he didn't want to see Yang Jia's face turn pale, so he wanted to explain it to her. Her refusal wasn't because she didn't want to, but because she couldn't. But... why should he explain?
If you don't care, why tell Yang Jia all this?
"You really don't have any feelings at all? No." Yang Jia leaned slightly to the side and pressed her face, which was a little hot from excitement, against the pillar. The cool feeling made her thoughts clearer. "No matter what the reason is, you are willing to say these words to me. This is a kind of care, isn't it?"
If Li Bai was truly like she said, with a world of emotions as barren as hers, and not understanding any emotions, then she wouldn't have revealed this matter after she confessed her feelings. After all, for Li Bai, this was a secret that concerned her own safety.
So Yang Jia felt that she might be emotionally indifferent, but she definitely didn't have no feelings at all.
Seeing the confusion on Li Bai's face, she continued, "Let me put it this way, have you ever had an experience where you had a strong desire for someone or something, and it even motivated you to change for it?"
"I..." Li Bai paused slightly and said, "I want to know what you are going to do and how far you can go."
Perhaps it was because Li Bai's tone was too serious and solemn. Even though the content was nothing special, when Yang Jia heard her say this, she suddenly felt as if someone was confessing their love to her. This made her cheeks burn and even her heartbeat slow down slightly.
Although Yang Jia also narcissistically thought that he should have some influence on Li Bai, and Bai Ting had said similar things before, when he really heard Li Bai say it, he had a completely different feeling.
At this moment, Yang Jia had a lot of thoughts in his mind, and seemed to have a lot to say, but he couldn't figure out a specific clue and didn't know where to start.
Finally, she sighed and looked up at the sky.
There is no moon tonight, and the sky is gently dotted with stars, turning the night into a beautiful and hazy dream.
Under the starry sky, Yang Jia whispered, "Li Bai, let's exchange secrets."
Of course, this sentence was more for herself than for Li Bai. Because Li Bai had already told her his secret, and Yang Jia... She now had some understanding of the ancient idea of repaying a favor with one's life. Li Bai's honesty made her feel that if she couldn't respond with the same honesty, she would be betraying this still naive love.
Even if there is no return after saying it.
"You've been observing me, haven't you?" she asked. "What conclusions have you drawn?"
Li Bai had been observing Yang Jia, a fact both of them knew, but until now, they had both pretended not to be aware of it. Now that Yang Jia had spoken out, she surprisingly didn't feel embarrassed at all. Li Bai walked over and sat down next to Yang Jia, then tilted his head and asked, "You're not a real NPC, are you?"
As expected, it hit the nail on the head. Yang Jia took a deep breath and said, "Yes."
She didn't intend to let Li Bai continue, lest her hard-won courage be deflated, so she simply said in one breath, "I'm not a real NPC. I'm just an NPC. As you know, I'm just a bunch of... data. I don't know why I suddenly became different from other data, but one day, I met you all, and suddenly realized that the world I live in is just a game. This story is no less absurd than your life experience, isn't it?"
Li Bai was well aware of the many suspicious points surrounding Yang Jia, but this answer certainly surprised her. Even with today's technology, where computers are far more powerful than the human brain and are known as "intelligent brains," the concept of "artificial intelligence" still exists only in the imaginations of scientists.
As a result, she bumped into one unexpectedly.
After a moment of silence, Li Bai said sincerely, "You are better than me."
Yang Jia smiled and said, "No, I'm just messing around. For a long time, I didn't know what I wanted. I just wanted to make some changes. This idea is a bit presumptuous. You said you wanted to see how far I could go, but I don't know myself."
Li Bai hesitated whether he needed to comfort her, because Yang Jia's current state looked... very confused.
But before she could extend her hand, Yang Jia turned around and smiled at her. "But, speaking of this, Li Bai, I think we're truly a match made in heaven. One has a human body, but can barely feel emotions; the other is just a blob of data, yet suddenly possesses human emotions like joy, anger, sorrow, greed, hatred, and ignorance." She concluded, "Neither of us is human, but we both want to live like one."
The author has something to say: Bug hunting. This author may be deeply in love with Yang Jia...
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
