Chapter 45: I feel bad. Why am I working overtime again late at night? * Yes...
*
For An, the time in the Glorious Church was the most peaceful period in her life.
Without his father's training, no one dared to do anything unnecessary to him. Everyone praised the nobleness of this holy son, but no one knew the pain behind it.
Some things can only be seen on the surface, and the rottenness inside is swallowed up, leaving only a vague and pale shadow for the owner.
The knights followed him, with crowns on their heads.
All beings applauded him, and the church regarded him as a favorite of God.
If An had been treated like this at the beginning, he would have been very flattered, but now he has changed.
Once something is lost, it is impossible to go back to the beginning.
The child who was full of expectations for family and longed for warmth has become completely desperate. He has become the Holy Son of the Church and an object of people's trust, except for the human being named An.
It was as if there was a transparent cover that isolated it from the outside world. In the dead of night, the blond child would lie on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling above his head.
He was clearly aware that something was broken in him, and the boiling emotions were pulled away from him, leaving only burnt ashes.
The temple that the Glorious Church provided for the Son of God was naturally very luxurious. White marble columns supported the arched door, and the hollow corridors on the walls were inlaid with floor-to-ceiling windows that reached the ceiling.
The sun shines brightly during the day and the moon shines brightly at night. The clear light illuminates the ground in every detail.
An walked out of the bedroom door wearing a coat, stood in front of the tall floor-to-ceiling window, and looked up at the soft full moon.
The wind gently blew through the child's long hair, and his arms under the white robe were smooth and silky, like a newborn baby after being baptized by divine magic.
Everything was quiet and peaceful, like a beautiful dream. The child stared at the moving night scene for a long time before finally moving.
He raised his hand and placed his palm against the transparent glass. The coldness of the night penetrated his palm through the window. An felt peaceful and calm in his heart.
In this most gentle and refreshing night, bathed in the watery moonlight, a peaceful thought came to his mind.
As simple as breathing and drinking water, thoughts fall lightly and a small flower blooms in the field.
He thought.
I want to die.
*
When humans are extremely desperate, they yearn for death, just like a child longs for his mother's arms.
Death, like life, is the original state and desire of human beings.
Many people are confused about why someone would want to die, but in fact, living requires a reason. When encountering pain, people will choose to fight with death, and in order to live, they need to find happiness and joy.
In a way, death is the result of everything, and life is the struggle of all living things. People use countless horrible words to describe death, which can prove the beauty of life. But for some people, it takes courage to live.
I could understand why the cheap believer thought this way, and I also seemed to understand why he came to my kingdom of God.
Just because he has been suffering for life, and I am the destination of all life.
*
The time in his memory continued to move forward, and soon he met someone.
It was an ordinary morning.
After finishing his prayer, the priest who was in charge of taking care of him bowed slightly and said gently, "Sir, this is the Knight Commander of the Church. He will be in charge of taking care of you from now on."
The blond knight knelt on one knee and bowed his head gently. His eyes were clear and peaceful, like a heavy mountain. No one could find fault with him, not even An.
The other party was even more like a template than he was. He even thought that if someone asked him about his standards for knights, he would report the name of this knight commander.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Lord Saint. I am Remiel. I hope you can give me your guidance in the days ahead."
Not only was he a cheap believer, but this was also the first time I knew the Knight Commander's name. When someone leaves such a deep impression, he loses his name. Whenever the corresponding word is mentioned, it is assumed to represent him.
Fortunately, the Knight Commander obviously did not resist such a thing. This knight was loyal and tenacious, and his faith and protection of God were engraved in his bones. He took great care of the Son of the Church.
Knowing that An likes the snacks in the city shops, he would queue up for hours to buy cakes. Knowing that he likes reading, he would look for some rare books every time he went on a mission. Whenever An needed something, he would always be the first to rush to his side.
This kind of good temper is a bit embarrassing, and An has mentioned this matter before.
"As the Knight Commander of the Church, you are usually very busy. You don't have to focus your energy on me."
It was spring in the courtyard at that time, with lush flowers in bloom and flourishing grass and trees.
Under the grace of glory, the church is always shrouded in sunlight, sacred and pure.
The blond knight turned his head to look at him, his expression was very gentle. Today he was wearing the light armor he used everyday, which made him look more friendly than usual. The scale-like armor shone in the light like a gem.
"The church is indeed important, but you are equally important to me. It is my duty to protect you."
An was stunned for a moment, then smiled and said, "You are a knight who is loyal to his duty."
"I'm doing my duty... Indeed. It's my duty to protect you, but I also hope that you can live happily here."
The Knight Commander said this, looking off into the distance.
"I have met many Sons of God, belonging to various churches. Perhaps their experiences and ages are different, but they all seem unhappy after becoming Sons of God."
"As the Son of God, you will need to contribute your body to God sooner or later. For the church, this is an honor, but for the Son of God, it requires you to contribute your life. At least before that, I hope you can live a happy life."
The Holy Son's mind moved, and he looked up at the other party. The blond knight lowered his eyes to look at him, curved his eyes and smiled slightly, as if glowing in the sunlight.
He was silent for a moment, and said sincerely: "You are a good person."
"Really? I feel like I still have a lot to do. There are still a lot of people in this world who need help. Even if I can't save everyone, I hope I can grab the hands of those who are asking me for help."
The Knight Commander's answer was quite in his style. An couldn't help but smile, and suddenly noticed something glowing on the other's chest. He moved closer out of curiosity and saw that it was a hexagonal medal.
The Knight Commander noticed his gaze, took off the medal and handed it to him.
"This is a medal of commendation from the church. You can take it and keep it if you like."
"No need, this is yours. I remember this is only awarded to believers who have made outstanding contributions. It must be precious, right?"
The Knight Commander said naturally: "It's okay, I still have a lot."
install:"......"
He felt as if he was being shown off. But looking into the other person's eyes, An felt that it was just an illusion. The Knight Commander was still looking at him with a sincere expression.
"You don't have to feel any burden. Since it's my medal, I naturally have the right to give it to anyone. This is also common among knights. If you really feel embarrassed, just think of it as my first gift to you."
The blond child felt warm in his heart. It must be said that there are such people in the world. Just seeing them will make you feel happy.
This is how people usually meet each other: the best time encounters the worst thing, and the worst time encounters the best person.
If the cheap believer had met the Knight Commander instead of his father at the beginning, he would have lived a very good life. But now, everything went smoothly.
His heart was a desolate dead land, which gradually turned into a broken ruin as time went by, until the day of complete collapse.
The praise of others and the glory of the church mean nothing to the blond saint.
He had only one wish, and that was to be liberated.
So on that day, the blond saint quietly made a decision.
*
It was a most ordinary day.
The sun enveloped the entire church, and believers came to pray. After the morning prayer, An found the Knight Commander. The latter was a little surprised, and then he heard the child's first somewhat willful request.
"Could you please go out with me for a while? I want to go out and take a look outside."
This requirement is somewhat unrealistic for the Sons of the Church, who, for safety reasons, are not allowed to leave the Church without orders.
The Knight Commander certainly knew this, and an apologetic look rose in his eyes: "I'm sorry, I can't take you out alone without the bishop's permission."
An Shi showed a lost expression: "What about walking around in the church?"
"That's no problem. I'd be happy to be your guide."
"That's great. Could you please do me one more favor?
The child had a youthful look on his face, looking a little uneasy and shy.
"Please don't wear armor and walk around quietly with me, okay? I don't want others to discover my identity."
The Knight Commander nodded without hesitation. He felt guilty for his previous refusal. If he was just going to the church, there was no reason to refuse.
"I understand. Please be careful. If anything happens, please leave immediately and don't put yourself in danger."
"Of course. Thank you."
Seeing this, An smiled brilliantly, his eyes full of dependence and love.
But this is just an illusion.
His heart was filled with indifference, and silence was spreading like a wildly growing vine. In the eyes of the Knight Commander, this Holy Son was just a child. But to An, he was already more mature than many people.
No one could tell anything was wrong just by looking at the outside, until An said goodbye to the Knight Commander and turned to his room.
The angels carved on the stone pillars played music and cast their eyes on the newcomers. The Son of God's white robe slid across the ground, and his golden hair fell loosely on his shoulders and then gracefully drooped down.
The air was filled with a faint scent of benzoin, but he ignored it.
An came to his bedroom, reached out and pulled all the curtains, and the room suddenly became dim.
Then he took out a bag of powder from under the bed and sprinkled it lightly on the mirror.
The silver mirror was reflecting the light, and ripples appeared on the surface of water. Soon, a voice came from the other side of the mirror.
"I didn't expect you would actually contact us."
"Isn't this what you expected to see?"
"Yes, it's a pity that more people can't see it. Otherwise, as the Son of Light, he is secretly contacting the followers of the Lord of Darkness. The expressions of those who see this scene must be very interesting."
The other party was obviously sneering. An remained calm and said indifferently, "If you don't need my help, we can stop contacting each other. I don't want to waste time on this nonsense."
"Well, what do you want to say?"
"I have already convinced the Knight Commander to take off his armor on that day. I need you to act according to the plan then."
"No problem, it's very easy for us."
"It's better. In many cases, you only get one chance. I hope you understand that."
"Of course—of course—you don't look like a child at all."
"I don't think you care about that."
"Ha, that's true. Then I'd like to say it's a pleasure to work with you."
The person on the other side of the mirror seemed to shrug, the image looked a little blurry on this side, and there was a hint of teasing in the tone of voice.
"But I am indeed curious about what good this will do for you. Could it be that the Glorious Church's treatment of you is not good enough, and that you are resentful and planning to defect to us?"
"I'd rather kill them myself than expect a bunch of you street rats to compete with the Glorious Church."
"You little slick-tongued kid, be careful not to end up losing more than you gain."
"Then I will definitely take you with me."
The two looked at each other and laughed coldly at the same time. An's expression was icy. If he had a choice, he would never choose to cooperate with the Dark Church. But if he didn't do this, he would never be able to leave the Glorious Church.
The Church of Glory had a thorough protection for the incarnation of God, and would never put it in danger unless something unexpected happened. Unfortunately, there was a traitor among them, the Son of Glory himself.
I was amazed at what I saw, and the rest was obvious, all part of the plan.
At An's request, the Knight Commander took off his armor that day, which allowed the Dark Followers to take advantage of the situation and snatch away the Son of Light.
He never thought that these people had the guts to come to the church to kidnap people, and he never thought that his own Son of God was in cahoots with them.
In order to make up for his mistakes and take back the Holy Son, the Knight Commander kept searching for clues about the enemy, and was seriously injured many times, and his equipment had to be repaired.
Even in this situation, the Knight Commander still did not give up the pursuit. During one of the pursuits, he was accidentally captured by the Dark Followers and locked in a dungeon.
And after being brought out by the dark believers, the cheap believers did not let them get what they wanted.
He did not want to surrender to the Lord of Darkness, he just needed to leave the territory of the Church of Light. After leaving, he did not hesitate to use the power of the Lord of Light to eliminate the dark believers around him, took the opportunity to escape, and broke into an unfamiliar forest.
This is a nice place.
The blond saint made an objective assessment and wiped the blood off his face nonchalantly. The attack of the dark believers left him covered in wounds, but with the protection of the Lord of Light, these wounds were far from fatal.
So, after groping around for a while and finding that he had nothing on him, he took out the medal from his arms.
It is hexagonal in shape, with the sun and Pegasus, the symbol of courage, engraved on its surface. It is the reward given by the church to outstanding believers and also the proof of his first friendship.
The sharp edges of the metal pierced the artery, and blood spurted out.
The blond child lowered his eyes, his expression as calm as ever. The sun fell on his eyelashes, casting tiny golden rays.
He seemed to think it was not enough, so he stabbed a few more times. The blood stained the robe red, and the young child leaned against the tree with a faint smile on his lips.
The wind blew through the hair by my ears, without a single response.
He was completely dead.
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