Chapter 74 Pure Love (Part Two) fu**k……I l……
Why do you have to like me?
"Stupid dog, so stubborn and stupid..." Yan Quan muttered to himself, "He's been deceived and used, yet he keeps trying to get back together..."
"Yan Ceyan, do you know how utterly despicable and pathetic you are right now? So... pathetic."
Yan Ceyan could clearly see that Yan Quan's lower eyelids were shimmering with a layer of moisture.
Yan Ceyan didn't understand why Yan Quan was crying.
Although the subject of her words was clearly "Yan Ceyan," it sounded more like... Yan Quan was feeling sad for herself.
“Yan Ceyan, the way you look—the way you ‘love’ me now…is exactly like my mother.”
"You should know very well. My mother, a woman who used every trick in the book to climb the social ladder."
"But do you know—when my mother was neither human nor ghost..."
Once a tagged omega is in heat, it will be completely dominated by pheromones, begging for the comfort of an alpha like an animal.
They have lost all sovereignty and have no human dignity whatsoever.
It has been completely reduced to a plaything discarded by others.
Yan Quan's clenched fist slammed down again—"That's why I don't want to. I don't want to become like you."
"I've never believed in any of this bullshit true love."
"I swore from a young age that I would never fall in love with anyone in my life."
"I was supposed to just play along and live a carefree, dissolute life until I died."
Yan Quan's voice gradually lowered: "I did have the opportunity to do that..."
"For the past seven years, countless white people have been throwing themselves at you, if it weren't for you—"
On a snowy Christmas street, in a noisy party corner, when one of the umpteenth Alphas approaches you to chat...
What I remember... is your face.
I've been living a carefree and comfortable life for a long time.
"Yan Ceyan..."
The force of Yan Quan's subsequent punch was noticeably weaker than the previous one.
"What kind of special, banned drug did the Yan family use to make your brain go haywire after you lost your memory?"
"Even if you've lost your mind... it's been seven years, Yan Ceyan, you should have realized it by now."
"How dare you call me 'free'?!"
Yan Quan's voice trembled as he spoke, carrying a barely audible sob.
"I wish I were truly 'free'."
"Do you think I care that much about the Yan Group's assets?"
"If I really wanted to abandon everything, I wouldn't have returned to China to clean up this mess that Yan family made in the first place."
"I should just marry a local white man in California, get a permanent green card, cheat on him, get a divorce... and have a good time until I die."
"But I still came back..."
Yan Quan murmured, his face showing a near-desperate helplessness: "I've tossed and turned for several sleepless nights, but I still... haven't cancelled that flight back home."
Yan Ceyan looked up in astonishment: "...?"
He met Yan Quan's gaze.
Yan Quan's eyes, those upturned eyes that always smiled with a fox-like, sinister glint, were now slightly red, staring wide-eyed at Yan Ceyan.
It looks... kind of pitiful.
"Thud—", as if by lightning. Or perhaps it's like parting the clouds to reveal the truth, a sudden and earth-shattering event.
The last piece of the memory puzzle that Yan Ceyan had lost in his mind was finally put back into its original position at this moment.
That moment must have been the peak of the torrential rain that night.
Yan Quan lay on the disheveled sheets, tightly embraced by Yan Ceyan who leaned down. Intense pheromones surged within the omega's hot body.
"Yan, Ce, Yan." Yan Quan called out the Alpha's name, word by word, as if precious jewels were emerging from an oyster shell.
He hugged Yan Ceyan's neck tightly and, with his hoarse and dry lips, kissed Yan Ceyan's earlobe for the first time, very earnestly.
"I've lied to you so many times..."
Three words, along with the datura flower mark on the back of her neck, bloomed: "I'm sorry."
Yan Quan's broken words, along with her tears, moistened Yan Ceyan's eyelids.
"But I am truly grateful that you became my eighteenth birthday."
And...most importantly, the last sentence:
"If this kind of feeling counts as 'liking'—"
"Then just consider it as me confessing my feelings."
*
“I forgot…” Yan Ceyan reached up to cover his throbbing forehead, looking at Yan Quan with utter astonishment:
"So that's the sentence."
It turns out that during the seven years they were separated... Yan Ceyan always felt guilty about the debt he owed Yan Quan that he couldn't express.
The matter was already settled on that rainy night when I was eighteen.
“When I went to Federation A…” Yan Quan’s eyes were a little red as she looked at Yan Ceyan with wide eyes: “It was really hard.”
“Yan Ceyan, I didn’t want to either.”
"I don't want to be this sad either."
This is like being "trapped".
But...
"By the time I realized it... it was too late." Yan Quan's thin frame made his veins bulge, and his hand trembled slightly as he pressed it against his chest.
"I can no longer control this feeling."
In Times Square, California, at the crossroads, whenever the damp, chilly rainy season arrives in Federal Republic A, Yan Quan involuntarily thinks of—
A torrential downpour that was both intense and sultry occurred at Nanli High School.
It belatedly reminded me: a heartless stone left all the last bit of warmth it had left in that flooded rainy season.
"Do you think I was forced to give birth to that child?"
"Yes... I never intended to get pregnant in the first place."
“It was your grandfather…he gave me fake birth control pills.”
A bitter, mocking smile appeared on Yan Quan's lips. "The appearance of that child was a complete accident."
"Get pregnant with a burden. Then have an abortion without hesitation... Any fool would choose that."
"But……"
Soon, Yan Quan's fingers dug into the bedsheet, gripping it tightly, his expression seemingly lost in some painful past: "Quite the opposite."
"That's what I thought."
"Yan Ceyan, it was my own choice to give birth to him."
...
*Yan Quan's memory route, beginning*
Six years ago, at a university-affiliated hospital in Federal A.
"You should terminate the pregnancy; this child will do you no good."
"I know, Doctor, but..."
Yan Quan stared at the shadows on the ultrasound report, suddenly feeling a little scared: "but..."
The doctor frowned: "Are you really thinking of having him?"
“Of course not…” Yan Quan immediately rejected the idea.
"I just..." Yan Quan scratched her hair in frustration, her gaze shifting from the report to the hospital's tiled floor, muttering to herself, "I just want..."
After a long while, Yan Quan seemed to have been struck by lightning. He abruptly raised his head, staring blankly at the doctor: "F***k..."
Some things are difficult to say in one's mother tongue.
But in a foreign land, in another language, Yan Quan was able to speak so naturally and fluently:
I love him.
The doctor smiled gently, seemingly unfazed. "It's totally normal—you're just hormonal. Once you've terminated the pregnancy, you won't feel this way anymore."
Ha... Yan Quan suddenly gave a self-deprecating dry laugh.
No, you don't understand what I mean.
The sudden appearance of unfamiliar words startled the doctor, who scratched his head somewhat bewildered and asked Yan Quan, "Are you speaking Chinese?"
Yan Quan did not answer the doctor's question, but simply placed his hand quietly on his left chest and continued to mutter to himself:
"Isn't it funny? I actually wanted to keep this kid."
"What's the point of keeping such a piece of rotten flesh?"
“We have nothing to do with each other anymore, he doesn’t even remember me. Why keep that person’s child?”
"Why...do we have to keep it?"
“Because…because…”, the answer was obvious, and Yan Quan’s breathing became slightly rapid, “I…f***ing miss him.”
Barring any unforeseen circumstances, Yan Quan will spend the rest of his life living and dying in Federation A, in this city where people speak unfamiliar accents and are immersed in unfamiliar culture.
The shadowy mass in her abdomen shown on the ultrasound report seemed to be the only connection between her and that alpha on the other side of the ocean.
The only one I made contact with.
"Ha..." Yan Quan spread his hands with a self-deprecating smile, the ball of air he had just clenched in his palm quickly dissipating—
It's clear that I can't grasp anything.
But still... I hopelessly cling to that sliver of possibility.
"Sorry, doc, I've decided not to have the abortion."
Yan Quan stood up abruptly, holding the test results, and pushed open the door to the consultation room, rushing out without a care in the world.
Disinfecting alcohol, blood-soaked cotton cloth, the foul breathing of the crowd... everything made Yan Quan feel a huge sense of being enveloped.
So Yan Quan quickened his pace, and after leaving the hospital building, he practically ran wildly through the cold wind on the streets.
As Christmas approaches, the streets of California are decorated with lights and decorations, and some shops have already set up Christmas trees with colorful lights in their windows.
People from Federation A walked down the street, arms around each other, their faces beaming with smiles, celebrating the upcoming birth of [the Lord].
Only Yan Quan.
Going against the flow of people, I ran clumsily and frantically like a madman.
The wind howled in his ears, urging him on, while rain and snow mingled and covered Yan Quan's face, leaving mottled streaks of water.
"Huff...huff..." Finally, Yan Quan stopped, exhausted, and squatted down, curling up in a ball. He placed his hands on his lower abdomen.
"What's up, Dude looks like he owes hundreds of millions of dollars."
"Could it be a stomachache, huh?"
Whispers drifted from the passersby: "God bless him..."
Yan Quan ignored the stares directed at him, only hunching his back, which was bent from squatting down, even tighter.
Just as his fist, clenched in his lower abdomen, was almost touching his left chest, Yan Quan suddenly thought of Wu Yingxue.
Lying listlessly on the sofa, tormented by her heat, Wu Yingxue frantically choked Yan Quan, cursing him as a wicked monster...
But when Yan Quan questions why she was born, Wu Yingxue briefly regains her senses, clinging to Yan Quan's head and repeating incoherent words:
Wu Yingxue said, "Quanquan, you're too young... so you don't understand. He took my heart away."
“I love him…that’s why I want to have you.”
The chilling sensation from the blow to his head instantly spread throughout his body, and Yan Quan suddenly grabbed his scalp and stared wide-eyed.
It turns out that I had long since become—the very thing I used to despise, loathe, and desperately try to escape…
His mother was in the same tragic situation.
What's even more ridiculous is that Yan Quan chose it himself.
Yan Quan was willing.
As if struck by a sudden inspiration, Yan Quan muttered resignedly, "Yan Ceyan."
"So this is what 'love' is."
Both foolish and ugly
It also makes people humble and blind to love.
*Yan Quan's flashback route, the end*
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