Chapter 14
The next day, early morning. The sunlight was blinding, as if nothing had happened the night before.
Lu Baiyan arrived at the hospital again, carrying a bouquet of fresh, dew-kissed white daisies. He had barely slept a wink last night, thinking about the future, how to work hard, how to fulfill his promise, and how to protect her. He had even planned to talk to her more today, to tell her not to be afraid, that he was there for her.
He walked to the door of the ward, only to find it open and empty. The bed was made up neatly, as if no one had ever lived there.
A sense of overwhelming foreboding gripped him instantly, making him almost lose his balance.
He rushed to the nurses' station, his voice trembling and incoherent: "Excuse me... the girl who stayed here yesterday, Xu Nianlei, did she... did she move to a different room?"
The nurse looked at the handsome young man, whose face was pale and whose eyes were bloodshot, and her eyes showed deep sympathy and regret: "That girl... she... she jumped off the building last night. We have already notified her family... please accept our condolences."
"boom--!"
Lu Baiyan felt as if a thunderbolt had exploded in his mind, and the whole world instantly lost all sound and color. The daisies in his arms fell to the ground, the bouquet scattered, and the pure white petals were trampled on by the footsteps of passersby.
He rushed towards the hospital's backyard, which faced the window of the ward from the previous night, as if he had gone mad...
The cement ground in the backyard had been roughly cleaned, but some undried water stains and a faint, dark red mark that was difficult to wipe away completely could still be seen.
Several early-rising patients and caregivers pointed and whispered in the distance, their faces showing fear and pity.
Lu Baiyan stood blankly before the mark, his body stiff as a stone sculpture instantly weathered. He couldn't believe it, couldn't think, couldn't accept it. The girl who had spoken to him yesterday, smiled at him (even if it was a forced smile), and promised him, had now turned into this cold, glaring mark before him.
He remembered her last pale and weary smile, her words, "Let me be alone for a while," her unusual calm and obedience... It turned out that it wasn't a compromise, but a farewell! A complete and utter goodbye, without any lingering attachment!
He was too foolish to see through her gentle smile, which concealed a heart already shattered into dust and a completely extinguished will to live.
Overwhelmed by immense pain, regret, anger, and despair, he collapsed like a tsunami. Unable to hold on any longer, his knees buckled, and he knelt heavily before the scar, sobbing uncontrollably. The ever-calm, composed, and emotionally reserved Lu Baiyan, at this moment, crumbled like a child who had lost the whole world, utterly vulnerable.
Xu Nianlei's funeral was held on a gloomy, rainy day. It was simple and quiet, with very few people in attendance.
Wang Xiuqin seemed to have aged twenty years overnight. Most of her hair had turned white, and her eyes were dull and empty, devoid of any of her former fierceness, leaving only a deathly silence. She held her daughter's urn, not crying, but only murmuring, "It's all my fault… I forced you to your death… It's all my fault…"
Despite his mother's strong opposition and obstruction, Lu Baiyan insisted on coming to the funeral. He stood in the distance, dressed in an ill-fitting black outfit, like a soulless sculpture. Rain soaked his hair and clothes, but he seemed oblivious.
He stared at the enlarged black-and-white photograph. In it, Xu Nianlei wore a melancholic yet serene smile, a look she rarely revealed. Her life was forever frozen at that dark, heartbreaking age.
Zhao Mei found him and forcibly dragged him away. In the car, seeing her son so distraught, as if his soul had been ripped from his body, she felt a mix of anger, anxiety, and heartache, and for the first time, she lost her temper with him.
"Lu Baiyan! Wake up! She's dead! Is it worth it for a girl from such a family, with such an ending? Do you even care about your future?!"
"Her death has nothing to do with you! Staying away from her is the best way to honor her and also a responsible thing to do for our family!"
Lu Baiyan remained silent, only turning his head to look at the raindrops sliding down the window, much like the nights he had walked her back to her dormitory. His eyes were empty, devoid of any light, as if all his emotions had vanished with the girl's departure.
His heart died along with it.
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