Chapter 116 Weakness
The small courtyard on the outskirts of the city was very quiet, with only the rustling sound of wind blowing through the bamboo forest.
Wei Wuxian sat on the soft couch by the window, wrapped in a thick woolen cloak that covered even his hands and feet. It was the scorching heat of July, but he felt cold all over, as if he were holding a piece of ice.
The aftereffects of the transfusion were more severe than he had imagined. The pain, like clockwork, recurred six hours a day, starting in the afternoon and gnawing at his bones until the night. Even more terrifying was the chills brought on by the blood loss—not even the air conditioner, even a draft could make him shiver, and his skin would turn purple when it touched an iced drink.
Lan Wangji feared he'd get bored, so he'd planted a trellis of wisteria in the yard. It was in full bloom, its clusters of shimmering purple blossoms hanging down like strings of agate. Wei Wuxian stared at the bright color, feeling a sudden itch in his heart, wanting to get some fresh air.
He quietly lifted his cloak and was about to get out of bed when he was caught by Lan Wangji who pushed the door open.
"Where do you want to go?" Lan Wangji's voice was very deep, his eyes fell on his arm that was only wearing a single piece of clothing, and his brows frowned instantly.
Wei WuXian retracted his hand and smiled sheepishly, “I just… wanted to go out and see the wisteria flowers.”
"It's windy outside." Lan Wangji came over, picked up the cloak draped over the back of the chair, and wrapped it around him again. His movements were gentle but undeniable. "If you want to watch, I'll move a chair to the corridor so you can sit and watch."
“No, no,” Wei WuXian held his hand, his fingertips cold, “I’m just talking, I won’t go out.”
He knew Lan Wangji was doing this for his own good. The last time he sneaked out to stand for five minutes, he came back with a high fever and rolled around in pain on the bed, which scared Lan Wangji so much that he watched him even more closely.
Lan Wangji didn't believe him. He just turned around and moved a rattan chair and a thin blanket. "It's sheltered from the wind on the porch. Go sit for a while."
Wei WuXian looked at his earnest profile, feeling warm inside. This man was always like this, never directly rejecting his little wishes, only finding ways to satisfy them within a safe range.
The two walked to the corridor. Lan Wangji put the rattan chair in place, covered it with cushions, and put a thin blanket on Wei Wuxian's legs before helping him sit down.
The wisteria flowers were right above his head. The wind blew, and a few petals fell, brushing against Wei Wuxian's cheeks, bringing a faint fragrance.
"Does it look good?" Lan Wangji sat down beside him and handed her a cup of warm honey water.
“It looks good.” Wei WuXian sipped the honey water, the sweetness sliding down his throat and slightly suppressing the sourness in his stomach. “It’s better looking than the one in Yunshen Pavilion.”
Lan Wangji smiled, said nothing, and just accompanied him quietly.
Sunlight streamed through the gaps between the wisteria leaves, casting dappled shadows on Wei Wuxian's face. His complexion remained pale, but against the backdrop of the flowers, it finally seemed to have a hint of life.
“Lan Zhan,” Wei Wuxian suddenly said, “What do you think Si Zhui is doing now?”
"The dressing should be changed at Wen Ning's place," Lan Wangji said. "Brother Xichen sent a message this morning saying he can walk again today."
Wei WuXian smiled, his eyes sparkling. "That's good. You've recovered really quickly."
He said this, but a bitter feeling welled up in his heart. He wanted so much to see Sizhui walk with his own eyes and hear him call "Daddy", but he was in such a state that he was afraid of even the wind, let alone going back.
Lan Wangji saw what he was thinking and held his hand: "When you feel better, we will go back to see him."
“Yeah.” Wei Wuxian nodded, but he knew in his heart that it might take a long time for him to get “better”.
The two of them sat quietly, listening to the wind and the occasional birdsong. Wei Wuxian leaned on Lan Wangji's shoulder, feeling the warmth from his body, and gradually began to feel drowsy.
The pain has not yet begun, and the peace at this moment seems particularly precious.
"Let's go back, the wind is getting strong." Lan Wangji pushed him gently.
Wei Wuxian drowsily opened his eyes and nodded.
Lan Wangji lifted him up and carried him sideways. Wei Wuxian instinctively hugged his neck like a docile cat. Back in the room, Lan Wangji laid him on the bed, tucked him in, and went to the kitchen to fetch the freshly brewed medicine.
The dark medicinal juice exuded a bitter taste. Wei Wuxian frowned, but still opened his mouth obediently.
Over the past month, he had grown accustomed to the taste. The bitter medicine flowed down his throat, bringing a wave of warmth that slightly alleviated the chill that had penetrated deep into his bones.
"Is it bitter?" Lan Wangji handed over a candied fruit.
Wei Wuxian held the candied fruit in his mouth, the sweetness spreading across his tongue. He shook his head, “Not bitter.”
With you by my side, even the most bitter medicine can taste sweet.
Lan Wangji sat beside the bed and tucked the quilt in for him: "Sleep for a while. When you wake up, I'll make you lotus seed soup."
"Okay." Wei Wuxian closed his eyes and soon fell asleep.
In his dream, he was back under the peach tree in Yunshen Pavilion. Sizhui, wearing a white shirt, ran towards him with a smile, calling him "Daddy." He opened his arms, wanting to hug the boy, but found his body getting lighter and lighter, and finally turned into a peach petal, falling into Sizhui's hair.
"Daddy?" Si Zhui picked up the petals in confusion. "Is that you?"
Wei WuXian wanted to answer, but no sound came out.
He suddenly opened his eyes, his chest heaving violently, and his forehead was covered in cold sweat.
"Are you having a nightmare?" Lan Wangji's voice sounded in his ears, filled with worry.
Wei Wuxian turned around and saw Lan Wangji sitting beside the bed, looking at him with a look of heartache in his eyes. He breathed a sigh of relief and reached out to grab his hand. “No… I just miss Sizhui.”
Lan Wangji held his hand and patted it gently: "Should I ask Jingyi to send some videos of Sizhui?"
"Okay." Wei Wuxian nodded.
Watching the video of Sizhui and Jin Ling playing chess in the yard, Wei Wuxian's heart gradually calmed down.
It’s great that his children are growing up well.
As for him, all he has to do is live well and wait for the day when he can return.
The wisteria outside the window was still in bloom, and the summer breeze blew through the bamboo forest, bringing the distant chirping of cicadas. Inside the room, the bitter aroma of herbal remedies and the sweetness of preserved fruit intertwined, like a plain yet warm song.
Wei Wuxian leaned in Lan Wangji's arms, looked at the boy in the video, and suddenly smiled.
The pain will come, the cold will be there, but love will always be there.
That's enough.
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