Chapter 203 Return
"Retrieve my...heart?"
Upon hearing the word "heart," a flicker of emotion, the first of its kind in the young man's calm eyes, appeared. Though subtle, it was the strongest emotional fluctuation he had shown since his birth.
Then he followed Pipa's gaze and looked down at himself.
He reached out to his heart, and sure enough, there was only silence in his palm.
But... what once happened here?
The young man was unsure whether he actually had any memories of anything before the present.
Because he is such a being, having neither past nor future, knowing neither life nor death.
He always sees the present – because his present has already spanned the past and the future.
Referring to the person in front of me as my younger self is not because I recognize them through memory.
— Rather, it was because of a vague, almost imperceptible feeling.
The young man knew there was a connection between them, a connection like an invisible thread loosely linking the two who should have had no interaction.
Each time the thread tightens, the young man follows this faint, fragile clue, which could break at any moment, and finds his own dying self.
Each time, it was at the moment when the other person was on the verge of death.
The young man thought this was probably because he was about to be dragged into the other side of the world. And what he had to do was listen to the other person's last wishes before they died and then fulfill them.
It's like a pre-programmed procedure—find that person, fulfill their wish, and keep doing it.
The young man didn't know his original intention for doing this, but he vaguely felt that it was an extremely important thing, as if his existence itself was for this purpose.
Besides that, is there anything else?
—Of course there are.
But perhaps because he had witnessed too much, those heart-wrenching deaths, those tragic songs of displacement, those bloody betrayals and deceit... seemed to have no effect on him anymore.
Without the backdrop of tragedy, it is impossible to clearly define what is called comedy.
So the young man just watched quietly, like an indifferent bystander who was bored out of his mind but couldn't find any other amusement.
Would interfering make the drama more exciting?
He had already rejected the idea before he even began to think about it.
In this world where there is no order of precedence, no beginning, and no end, he had already foreseen all the endings.
The same story, the same script, played out again and again. Does the fact that the actors playing opposite each other make the screenwriter more skillful?
No, it won't.
Because that's how things are in the world, and that's how people's hearts are... even his existence was preordained.
The young man was not frustrated, nor did he feel regret, resentment, or any other good or bad emotions. He simply didn't have any particular feelings about it.
Legend has it that the origin of the world was chaos.
In different versions of the legend, the state of ignorance is distinguished and broken in different ways.
For example, a God who created something from nothing, calling forth light in the darkness, and then creating all things...
For example, Pangu, who split the heavens and the earth with an axe, fell down after completing the initial work and transformed into all things...
Every story originates from chaos, then a certain point emerges, and at that crucial moment, an unprecedented entity suddenly intervenes, causing a cataclysmic change in the world.
It has finally transformed into something completely different from anything we've ever seen before.
Isn't that strange?
What was the opportunity?
It seems no one has ever truly provided an answer; all that's available for reference are vague explanations. For example, coincidence, or just the right timing…
Therefore, existence itself becomes correct.
The world exists because of a chance encounter, which is a perfect blessing for the people who inhabit it.
They deduced that critical juncture based on their own life and death, and created a superhuman figure based on their own image that could play a key role at that juncture.
They even revered them as gods and worshipped them.
This is used to demonstrate its rationality and initiative.
Because they are God's people, they are entitled to enjoy this world; because they have inherited God's power, they are naturally better able to transform this world into what they desire.
They explored patterns, established order, defined the boundaries of things, distinguished between similar and dissimilar things, and further subdivided the similar things into more detailed categories.
No one knows when, where, or for what the first bloody struggle among our kind occurred.
Of course, this first scenario is just an assumption, like assuming a predetermined causal law—
You need to believe that there are no exceptions, not because exceptions occur at an unobservable level, but because existing, known patterns prevent such accidents from happening.
In short, when people are forced into bloody struggles and sacrifices, whether actively or passively, whether evilly or justly, war has already acquired its corresponding definition and inevitability.
It is as unbreakable as existence itself.
The young man watched all of this, seeing how those people, so meticulously distinguishable by age, gender, appearance, and many other characteristics, were ultimately divided by nature into two camps: life and death.
This division is independent of human will.
To be born is to be born, and to die is to die. People therefore feel powerless.
If the fear of death is an instinct, then the pain of losing a companion or the death of a fellow human undoubtedly exacerbates this instinct.
Human lifespan may be greatly extended due to technological advancements and increased productivity, but the gap between life and death will always remain insurmountable.
It's like the gesture by which God rolled up the darkness, or the axe by which Pangu separated heaven and earth.
So beautiful and magical, when humans raise their hands in sweet imagination, all they do is light a faint flame in the boundless darkness.
—You saw the firelight, and thus you also saw the vast darkness beyond it.
The age of mythology seems to have come to an end.
But those strange and mysterious legends exude a richer and more exquisite fragrance than ever before.
The increasingly clear division of labor and increasingly distinct hierarchies—beneath the facade of freedom created by loneliness and isolation lies a hidden longing for the ambiguous era of coexistence between humans and gods.
Does God really exist?
--not necessarily.
But people can believe in the existence of God, and thus believe that it was an era that combined romance and possibility.
Would going back to the past really be better?
—Not necessarily.
But the beauty that exists only in fantasy is always infinitely close to perfection. Because true perfection never exists, and this imperfection itself is a kind of ultimate perfection.
Thus, in this era long since the passing of Pangu—and even the death of God—people, with an extremely pragmatic attitude, embarked on a grand and fantastical scientific movement to create a new god.
First, it needs sufficient height and distance to ensure it possesses the aura and texture of a deity. But it cannot be too far away; rather, it needs to maintain just the right distance and height... like the moon.
It is a sight to behold, and undoubtedly one of the most enchanting and dazzling places in the night sky.
People are irresistibly drawn to the moonlight, looking up at the moon and becoming completely captivated by it.
The moon's radiance can fall on the earth like sunlight, but it never burns people's skin or stings their eyes. Instead, it is like a gentle mother, silently illuminating this world.
Therefore, if an artificial god exists, it must possess a moon-like quality.
The role of artificial gods is to roam between heaven and earth, acting as a mediator between humanity and the unknown, and realizing the beautiful vision of collective human happiness.
And then...and then...
After the text, which resembled background information, a hissing sound, like white noise, suddenly appeared.
The young man was not particularly troubled.
Although, based on the reasoning, it's highly likely that I was a product of that plan, the lack of supporting evidence means I can only remain at the level of conjecture.
Success or failure is not part of the evaluation system for young people.
All he knew was that the time had come... Guided by that faint, yet real, force, he appeared before his younger self.
However, this time, it seems I arrived too early.
Because the other was not yet in a state of near-death chaos, they saw each other face to face, alive, or at least not quite dead.
This should have been something that shouldn't have happened, the young man thought, but given his usual attitude, it happened... There was nothing special about it, just a matter of waiting a little longer.
While waiting, the young man took the initiative to greet the other person. This seemed to be forbidden, but who cares, he just suddenly felt like doing it.
—Yes, he thought.
It wasn't because of the necessary procedures set by the program, but because he "wanted" to do it.
Not only that, he also said unnecessary things to the other party, including some things that he shouldn't have said.
but……
Who cares?
However, before that moment arrived, the boy took the initiative to ask her to go out and see someone one more time.
Is this considered a final wish before death?
The young man was somewhat uncertain.
This wish seems a little too peaceful, not obsessive enough, nor bloody enough.
So he repeatedly confirmed with the other party—well, he had to admit, this also fell into the category of "shouldn't be".
Unexpectedly, the boy who had previously firmly stated that he wanted to see someone again suddenly changed his mind... So, he changed his mind after all?
The young man was not surprised; he would never underestimate the greed of a human being, even if that person was himself.
Then, however, I heard a request that was somewhat absurd.
go home……
These two words stirred a slight ripple in the young man's heart—but it wasn't enough until he heard the person opposite him ask him if he wanted to retrieve his heart.
His heart... his heart...
The young man's first reaction was, "So such a thing really exists?"
He pressed his hand to his left chest, the place where the heart is usually located.
At this moment, there was complete silence.
It seems to have always been this way, and it seems to continue to be this way in the future.
But the boy asked him if he wanted to get his heart back... What was the previous sentence again?
It seems like going home, returning to where the other person truly came from.
The place of origin, that is, the source.
The source is something that can be traced infinitely, but for people caught in the cycle of reincarnation, where can one call it the true source?
The boy just smiled, but with his face covered in horrifying bloodstains and things being washed out of his eyes with the blood, even someone who had seen many corpses and remains could hardly call it a pleasant sight.
But the young man was inexplicably drawn to that smile, or perhaps to the suggestion in the other person's words.
He couldn't tell the difference, so he simply gave up trying to explain.
The boy spoke, his voice so soft and hoarse, it sounded like a soft whisper... or perhaps his own echo.
The boy smiled and said softly, "My wish is for it to be as you wish."
"...As you wish?" The young man repeated the other person's words in a daze.
The moment the words left his mouth, he saw a look of relief on the boy's face, as if his long-cherished wish had been fulfilled, and the already broken body finally collapsed forward.
The young man reached out to take it, but his outstretched arms embraced nothingness.
The house began to shake, as if it were being squeezed to its limit by the darkness outside. It looked like the house was about to collapse, but the young man showed no intention of leaving.
I simply stood there, feeling the familiar yet unfamiliar steady beating in my chest.
His heart... has returned.
With a loud bang, the sound of earth collapsing overhead came from above.
A clod of dirt fell and hit his shoulder, startling him; this would never have happened before.
Because he isn't...
In the instant that darkness collapsed and buried him, he vaguely remembered that even after retrieving his heart, he was now nothing more than a mortal.
But it was too late; this was probably the ending he couldn't escape in the end.
The familiar darkness descended once more.
This time, however, it was no longer completely silent; it was noisy, as if many people were surrounding him.
One voice stood out in particular—who… was crying?
The noise gave him a headache, and his body felt like it was on fire, with pain all over.
My chest feels incredibly heavy, and I can hardly breathe.
"It moved! My brother's eyelids moved!" someone exclaimed in surprise.
Then, the previous commotion paused for a moment, and even the crying sound stopped for a moment.
youth--
Yu Qingzhou opened her eyes with some difficulty, and facing the incredulous gazes of the crowd, she smiled weakly: "Why... is it so quiet all of a sudden? I'm not used to it."
The child who had been calling him "brother" stared with wide, round eyes, first surprised, then overjoyed, then with reddened eyes, trying to rush over, but was pushed aside by the boy who was standing nearby.
Just as she was about to get angry, she seemed to remember something and sullenly retreated to a corner.
The others exchanged a few pleasantries with Yu Qingzhou, saying they wouldn't disturb her rest, and then left one after another.
Yu Qingzhou was left alone with the silent boy in front of him, his head bowed.
Looking at the other person's childish behavior, Yu Qingzhou couldn't help but chuckle: "Aren't you getting up yet? You're like an ostrich."
Upon hearing this, the boy shifted slightly, but still did not raise his head.
He just muttered, "You're the ostrich."
Yu Qingzhou sighed and reached out to stroke the fluffy, grayish-white head: "Alright, alright, I'm an ostrich, okay? Be good, lift your head up. I've almost forgotten what you look like since I haven't seen you in so long—"
Before he could finish speaking, the head in front of him suddenly lifted up, revealing a boy's face with red eyes and a red nose, looking both funny and cute.
Finally, he added menacingly, "You dare!"
It's turned into a little rabbit...
Yu Qingzhou thought to himself and then blurted it out. He said it with a smile, but then his smile vanished. The rabbit had such sharp teeth that it bit his lip until it bled.
Yu Qingzhou thought to himself, "How can you treat a patient like this?" Just as he was about to push the boy away, the boy pounced on him and grabbed his shoulder, saying in a pitiful voice, "I've been waiting for you for so long... Yu Qingzhou."
He paused for a moment, then said, "Welcome back."
Ah... the fire just won't come out all of a sudden.
Yu Qingzhou couldn't help but sigh inwardly again, and reached out to put her arm around the other's shoulder, feeling the slight trembling on the boy's shoulder, and felt a wave of tenderness in her heart: "Yes, I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, A-Xiao."
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