Chapter 41 "Does my brother really like that big idiot Li Xiao that much?"
After Lan Gongzi's funeral, I never saw Li Xiao again.
Mr. Ajiu would occasionally bring over some things, only saying that it was the young master's order, and he would not say anything else.
If you ask Li Xiao, the answer is always the same: "Young Master is fine."
As for exactly how good it is, and whether it's really that good, they refused to reveal a single detail.
As expected, Mr. Ajiu answered my question word for word as usual, and added at the end: "Young Master said that if there is anything you want, you can tell Ajiu directly, and Ajiu will convey it to you truthfully when he gets back."
Is there anything you want?
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught sight of the table and low table piled high with food, and I couldn't help but smile bitterly to myself.
My daily life in the building is entirely on Li Xiao's account, and he also frequently asks Ajiu to send me so much food and supplies. What more could I possibly want?
If I had to say something, it would probably be that I want to see Li Xiao one more time, and then... then I can personally return the jade pendant to him.
...Apart from that, there shouldn't be anything else.
In the days that followed, I asked about Li Xiao's recent situation many times, but the question I really wanted to ask never came out: Will Li Xiao come back again?
He came here because of Young Master Lan.
He keeps the former residence of Young Master Lan intact because he doesn't want outsiders to enter and disrupt its original state. Strictly speaking, in Li Xiao's eyes, I might be considered part of Young Master Lan's legacy.
He explicitly told me to stay here and asked the steward to take care of me, which was actually a way of looking after Young Master Lan's belongings.
Perhaps, for the rest of his life, Li Xiao will never set foot in this place again.
Because he was never the kind of person who enjoyed romance or indulged in sensual pleasures.
Otherwise, they wouldn't have allowed Young Master Lan to be so indifferent for so long, yet he remained tireless and enthusiastic, ignoring the olive branches and glances offered by other beauties in the building, and even feeling disgusted by them.
But with Young Master Lan gone, what reason does Li Xiao have to come back?
If he had no thoughts of remembering someone upon seeing the object.
If he didn't want to be reminded of the past, then everything he was doing now was simply to give the deceased a peaceful resting place.
So I... he probably doesn't want to see me again either.
Thinking of this, I unconsciously looked at the head of the bed. The box had been there ever since it was delivered, and it hadn't been touched.
However, because it is wiped down every day, it is very clean, without a speck of dust.
While wiping the box, I noticed a small chip near the bottom edge, probably left from when I fell off the bed and hit the wooden footrest. The chip is very small, almost negligible, but ever since I found out, I can't help but reach out and touch it.
It was a bit prickly at first, but gradually it became softer, as if it was a natural depression rather than a flaw caused by an accident.
I've never understood why Li Xiao gave me the jade pendant.
If he was just confused because he was afraid of blood at first, then what happened later...? Did he know what giving someone a jade pendant engraved with his name meant in this building?
I think he probably really didn't know, which is why he gave it away so casually.
Or perhaps he wanted to use this jade pendant as compensation for the scar on my forehead.
—Once the goods are delivered, the grudges will naturally be settled.
He no longer needs to feel guilty; he can leave gracefully, put the past behind him, and start a new life.
As Mr. Chang said, I don't owe anyone anything, and no one owes me anything.
There are no debts, no need to repay, no entanglements, which means the cause and effect have ended.
If that's the case, why doesn't Li Xiao send Mr. Ajiu over every now and then to deliver these extra things? Could it be... that he's worried I'm not taking good enough care of Young Master Lan's old residence?
It's not impossible.
Thinking about this, I suddenly felt relieved and turned to Mr. Ajiu, who was still patiently waiting for an answer, and said, "No need."
I said I didn't really want anything.
"The things that have been delivered are enough to last for a while. It's only been a short time since the New Year, and the Lantern Festival is just around the corner. This way, Mr. Ajiu can take a break and won't have to run back and forth so much."
Upon hearing this, Mr. Ajiu said that this was his job, and besides, it was just delivering some things, so it was really not hard work.
I smiled and shook my head: "But Pipa will feel bad. As for Young Master Li, I would appreciate it if Mr. Ajiu could give me his regards."
At this point, I paused for a moment before carefully continuing, "I would like to say that thanks to Young Master Li's care, everything is fine with Pipa, and we will continue to take good care of everything here, so Young Master Li can rest assured. Also, I would like to wish him a happy Lantern Festival in advance."
As usual, Mr. Ajiu nodded readily in agreement after hearing what I said.
I know that Mr. Ajiu will relay these words to Li Xiao verbatim.
So, I'll probably be spending the rest of the year alone until the Lantern Festival.
Actually, it's not a big deal when you think about it.
After all, I spent New Year's Eve the same way; while others stayed up to welcome the new year, I went to bed early.
When the sound of firecrackers crackling and popping all around, I was suddenly awakened and realized that I had been asleep for quite a while.
So I got up, poured myself some tea, and held it in my palm. The tea cooled down and then warmed up again. It warmed up and then cooled down again. I stood under the window, listening to the commotion outside, which lasted from dusk till dawn.
The person in charge was unusually generous in giving out red envelopes, almost everyone received one, though the amount varied depending on who received it.
I eat and dress in the building, so I don't need much money on a daily basis. I casually put the red envelope into the small cabinet built into the wall next to the bed. The bottom drawer already contains a lot of money, which I have slowly saved up since I came to Young Master Lan's side.
The amount has long exceeded the money I received for selling myself, but it may not be enough to redeem me now.
No, even if I have enough money to buy my freedom, I definitely can't get out on my own, unless... unless what?
I chuckled to myself at my own wishful thinking, shook my head, and tried to get rid of all those unrealistic thoughts.
My fingertips touched something cool and hard between the mattress and the wall. Looking down, I realized it was a brand new copper coin.
It had unique patterns and designs that were not found on ordinary coins, so I recognized it at a glance as the copper coin that Li Xiao had wrapped in a coriander dumpling on the night of the Winter Solstice, intending to bring good luck to Young Master Lan, but which ended up in my mouth by mistake and knocked out two of my front teeth.
I don't know how I ended up in this place, and I only found out now.
Thinking back to that night, I still feel that it was the most lively winter solstice I've ever experienced since I can remember.
Unfortunately, it happened just over a month ago, but it feels like half a lifetime has passed... Maybe it's not that exaggerated, but it's at least a matter of life and death.
I reached out and touched the copper coin as if possessed.
Thinking that since it belonged to Li Xiao, she might as well put it on the bedside table like the box containing the jade pendant. Now that Li Xiao probably wouldn't come again, it seemed that the jade pendant wouldn't be returned, so she might as well put them together neatly.
Unexpectedly, with just a light touch, the copper coin slipped through the gap between the bed and the wall. It then made a gurgling sound, and after hitting something, it went silent.
I quickly peeked out from under the bed, only to be completely blocked by the foot pedal.
Even peering through the crack, it was pitch black; you couldn't see anything at all.
I stared at the darkness for a long time, feeling lost, and suddenly felt a dull, aching pain in my heart, as if someone had twisted it.
...It seems that what I lost was not just a coin, but the entire memory of that winter solstice night.
I remained motionless with my upper body leaning downwards for a long time until large patches of black began to appear in front of my eyes due to the rush of blood to my brain.
Then I lost my balance, and with a dull thud, I fell headfirst onto the floor, blanket and all.
The moment I hit my head, I seemed to see fireflies dancing in the air, slowly disappearing into the darkness.
I heard a faint footstep, followed by the sound of the outer door being pushed open and someone walking in. It was extremely faint, yet exceptionally clear, interspersed among the small, sharp ringing in my ears.
Someone approached, their footsteps stopping nearby.
I was hanging upside down on the edge of the bed in an extremely contorted position, and could only see a corner of a dark robe in my limited field of vision, which was as light as a lotus petal unfurling in the air.
I felt a pair of warm, strong arms reach out and lift me up, gently placing me back on the bed.
Her long, dark hair fell down, gently obscuring my view.
In my turbulent vision, I vaguely saw a small part of that person's profile flash by.
With just one glance, my eyes widened instantly, for I clearly caught sight of a tiny, blood-red beauty mark on that fair skin—vibrant, striking, and impossible to look away from…
"orchid……"
In my panic, I almost bit my tongue. Unable to communicate with words, I could only reach out and try to grab the other person tightly.
My mind was a jumbled mess, like two voices were fighting each other.
The resolute voice said: Impossible, Young Master Lan is long dead, so this person could not possibly be Young Master Lan.
Another, somewhat hesitant voice weakly raised a question: But all we've heard about Young Master Lan from others has been through word of mouth. Since we didn't see him one last time, perhaps…
The former immediately retorted: So, does that mean that guy Li Xiao would joke about Young Master Lan's life and death?
The weak voice hesitated: But...but this person has the same red beauty mark as Young Master Lan, even the location is exactly the same.
A resolute voice once again expressed its opposition: There are plenty of people in this world who look the same and hold the same position; we can't just grab anyone and call them Young Master Lan.
The weak voice hesitated slightly: "It's not that much, is it?"
Upon hearing this, the firm voice looked quite disdainful: "I've only recently met one."
—Him?
—That's him.
—But can things that happen in dreams also be considered part of that?
But who can be sure that it was just a dream?
The weak voice fell silent, and then, urged on by the firm voice, I uttered that person's name in my mind.
"orchid……"
It is the orchid of the orchid family, not the orchid of the young master orchid.
As I uttered that word again, I felt a hand grip my wrist.
I think I heard a very soft sigh, accompanied by the gentle yet firm separation of fingers. Something else was placed in my hand, round, hard, and flat, still warm from that person's hand.
I held the thing somewhat helplessly until the black patches in front of my eyes disappeared along with the dizziness. When I looked up again, there was no one wearing dark clothes anymore.
The only remaining scent was a faint smell of smoke in the air, like the aroma of medicine or the incense sticks used in temple worship, with a hint of orchid fragrance mixed in.
The fragrance of flowers came from the windowsill.
That day, after I collected the powder from the withered orchid, I asked someone to move a new orchid to the original porcelain vase.
The smell was never very noticeable, probably because I stayed indoors the whole time—as the saying goes, you don't smell the fragrance after a while.
However, the fragrance of the orchid became more pronounced against the backdrop of the smoke from the fire.
So I'm pretty sure that what just happened wasn't an illusion. Besides, I still have a copper coin left behind by that person.
The pattern is very similar to the one that Li Xiao used to wrap in dumplings, but it looks like it's been around for a while. The color is a bit dull, with a softness that comes with the wear and tear of time.
At that moment, footsteps sounded again from outside.
I stiffened and sat up straight, staring intently at the entrance connecting the inner and outer rooms.
...Could it be that the person has returned for some unknown reason?
I felt a little nervous, my mouth was dry, and my hands unconsciously clenched the copper coin.
The footsteps quickly reached the entrance, and a figure appeared behind the curtain.
It was neither the ghost of Young Master Lan, nor a mysterious young man veiled in a dream, but a real, living person.
"Mr. Ajiu?!" I couldn't help but exclaim.
Perhaps my tone was a little too excited.
Upon hearing this, Mr. Ajiu looked somewhat embarrassed: "I'm sorry I startled you. I knocked on the door but no one answered, and then I noticed the door was ajar, so I came in on my own out of concern."
"No, no, actually it was just now..."
I was about to explain, but I didn't know where to begin.
I fell headfirst because I was staring at the copper coin that rolled into the bed. In my hazy state, I seemed to see a dream person who looked a lot like Young Master Lan. That person even picked me up from the ground and gave me another copper coin.
This kind of thing sounds really strange no matter how you look at it.
It might even make Mr. Ajiu mistakenly think that I have some kind of mental problem.
But... I did see it for sure.
By the way—
"Did you see anyone coming downstairs when Mr. Ajiu came over?"
This place was originally quite quiet, and after Young Master Lan left, apart from the manager and a few other people from the building, almost no one came here.
The most important thing, of course, was the order from the person in charge, but some superstitious people felt that Young Master Lan's violent death was unlucky, so they were unwilling to go near this place.
Not long after that person left, Mr. Ajiu arrived.
Perhaps, the two of them might just brush past each other on the stairs, in that case...
However, Mr. Ajiu shook his head upon hearing this, indicating that he had not seen anyone else along the way.
"What's wrong? Did something happen?" he said, his gaze towards me filled with both worried concern and confusion.
Like the expression on his face that day when he heard me readily agree not to attend Young Master Lan's funeral.
Seeing this, I could only shake my head.
"It's nothing. I just tripped and fell without noticing. I vaguely heard someone walk by outside, but I must have misheard. Maybe it was just the sound of the wind."
After I finished speaking, I realized that I seemed to have used this reason before.
Fortunately, Mr. Ajiu didn't think much of it. Hearing this explanation, which was barely acceptable, his thick, dark eyebrows relaxed slightly.
"That's true, it's been windy lately, so it's possible to make some noise." He paused, then looked at me, "You just said you fell, did you hurt yourself anywhere?"
I shook my head and smiled: "How can a perfectly healthy person get hurt so easily?"
However, faced with Mr. Ajiu's sincere face, I couldn't help but add, "Of course, Pipa will pay attention next time."
Then, I asked Mr. Ajiu why he had come all of a sudden.
Mr. Ajiu then slapped his forehead, as if he had just remembered that he had something important to do, and took out two red envelopes from his pocket and stuffed them into my hand.
"This is for the young master. There's also one for me and my sixth brother and a few others. It's not much, just for fun, so please don't mind."
He stared blankly at the two equally beautiful and festive red envelopes for a moment before lowering his head and saying, "How could that be?"
Why would you feel disgusted?
After all these years, this is the first time I've received so many New Year's greetings.
I said some auspicious words and reached out to take the two red envelopes.
"Happy New Year! May the new year bring you peace, prosperity, and success," I said.
“You too,” Mr. Ajiu replied with a hearty laugh. “We all are.”
That afternoon, Chang Li also skipped and hopped along with Mr. Chang to offer New Year's greetings.
I felt a little ashamed; what kind of elder, Mr. Chang, would personally come to pay New Year's respects to a younger generation? But Chang Li said that his grandfather didn't care about that.
"Besides, am I younger than my brother? I'm the one who came to pay New Year's respects; Grandpa just happened to be there."
Upon hearing this, Mr. Chang seemed a little embarrassed, so he coughed lightly and took out a red envelope from his sleeve.
"I came here with sincerity. What about you?" Mr. Chang stroked his beard dismissively.
Unexpectedly, Chang Li replied matter-of-factly, "I have myself, and I am the best gift."
As she spoke, she brought her round head close to my palm, her bright black eyes sparkling with eager anticipation: "I'm super lucky, brother, come touch me, and your luck will double next year~"
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Mr. Chang, whose face clearly showed he couldn't bear to look, so I silently looked away.
I smiled and took out the red envelope I had prepared and handed it to the child.
As Chang Li stared at the red envelope in his hand with delight, he gently placed his palm on the fluffy little head and patted it.
A fluffy little head nuzzled against my palm. The soft touch evoked some memories that weren't too distant.
Almost inappropriately, I recalled that night when I shared a bed with Li Xiao.
The boy had also unconsciously moved closer to me in his sleep, rubbing his cheek, which was covered in messy, tangled hair, against my palm.
—I wonder what he dreamed about back then.
Even now, when I think about it, I can still vaguely feel that heavy, tingling sensation in my palm and joints. That was the result of being used as a pillow by the other person for a long time.
When the two men came to our door that day, I had no idea that the grandfather and grandson would be leaving in a few days.
Perhaps Changli already knew, because that day he stayed close to me, not chattering as usual, but his round black eyes kept staring at me intentionally or unintentionally, as if he were seeing me for the first time.
I had a feeling that he had something he wanted to say to me.
But he didn't say anything, and I didn't ask him either.
If some things are destined to have no outcome, it's better not to bring them up in the first place, so as to avoid being disappointed and adding to the sense of loss.
However, Chang Li seemed quite interested in the small box on the bedside table.
It's probably because children are naturally drawn to brightly colored things.
"What is that?" Chang Li asked with a curious look.
The expression on his face was somewhat like when he first met him next door, when he was staring intently at an orchid on the windowsill, seemingly lost in thought.
I thought about it for a moment, then took it down, held it on my lap, and opened it to show him.
Chang Li, who had been quite interested, suddenly quieted down after seeing the jade pendant on the colorful knot. His short legs, which had been dangling on the edge of the bed, stopped moving and he stared intently at the jade pendant.
Perhaps due to the angle, the pupils of those already dark, round eyes seemed larger than usual, as if they had spread outwards.
Just as I was about to ask what was wrong, Changli suddenly looked up at me with a pitiful expression and blurted out a sentence.
"Does my brother really like that big idiot Li Xiao that much?"
I let out a confused "Ah," not knowing where to begin.
"...Why do you think that?" I asked.
Upon hearing this, Chang Li poked the name engraved on the jade pendant with her little round finger: "Isn't this that big idiot's name? It's one thing for my brother to give me a jade pendant separately, but he even carefully put it in such a box. What else could this be but favoritism?"
I wanted to answer that it wasn't given to Li Xiao by me, but rather given to me by Li Xiao. But that would seem even stranger.
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