Chapter 13 Chapter 13 - Tool Girl
Thanks to my crazy behavior on New Year's Eve, Suxi caught Qingfu's eye.
After playing a game of cards together, Qingfu admired Suxi's composure in the face of danger and spread the word that he would promote her and Huiyue to be the chief palace maids of Zichen Palace next year.
Everyone was shocked and jealous at once. The chief maid in the Purple Palace was a position that brought honor to the family, the pinnacle of a maid's career, and a smooth road to class advancement!
The pie fell from the sky that night, and I was ecstatic. In my excitement, I didn't forget to reward my mentor. That night, he brought back a basket of cheese cherries from the kitchen and insisted on giving it to me.
"Sister Suxi, this is not possible. I almost hurt you so much, and you still give me something. This is not appropriate!" My face turned red and I tried my best to refuse her kindness.
Su Xi was in high spirits, full of energy, and said, "What's inappropriate about it? As the saying goes, success comes from carefulness, and wealth is sought through risk. Madam Shen, you gave me this opportunity and let me show my face in front of Grandpa Qingfu. How can you be harming me?"
I really couldn't persuade her, so I had to accept it reluctantly. Under Suxi's eager gaze, I forced myself to eat three bowls of cheese and cherry soup, and burped countless milky things in the middle of the night.
A few days later, the cute little Yide who worked in Yanying Palace came to me and told me excitedly that he had successfully been promoted from a cleaning eunuch to a glorious inner palace eunuch. Not only did his status improve, but his salary also increased slightly. Now when he meets old acquaintances, they all look at him with envy, which makes him extremely satisfied.
I encouraged him: keep up the good work, and strive to make a name for yourself one day by being a boxer and a good person!
Everyone was busy getting promoted and making money, and I was no exception. At my stern request, the dog emperor readily gave me double the salary, on the condition that I be his tutor, starting from one hour every day, responsible for answering his questions, grinding ink and handing him pens.
Later, he found out that I was terrible at grinding ink, so he reduced my job to just answering questions.
Although I think this job is boring, there are many people outside who envy this opportunity, especially Wei Xizi, who is so envious that he is about to cry.
"I also want double the salary," Wei Xizi said eagerly, "Is Your Majesty still short of people?"
"Why are you doing extra work for no reason?" I asked, puzzled. "It's so annoying to serve him."
"I want to save more gold and silver, but rice and money are expensive in Chang'an. Last year, when I passed the imperial examination but wasn't appointed yet, I could only afford steamed buns with bran and vegetables every day," Wei Xizi complained. "My mother even wrote to ask if I'd bought a house in Chang'an. What house? I can't even afford a hut in a wealthy family!"
I didn't dare say anything. My family had just bought a luxury house in Shengyefang, and I was afraid he would be upset if I told him.
"Why don't you practice calligraphy more, Brother Xizi? I heard that writing inscriptions can make money quickly... Oh! I remember that when the late emperor was alive, he gave a house in Anyifang to Wu Qi, the then official. If you do well enough, maybe our emperor will give you one too!" I racked my brains to think of a way for him to make money.
Unexpectedly, Wei Xizi's face flushed and he shyly replied, "Thank you for your kind words. If I had a house in Anyifang, I would have the courage to... to ask her for marriage."
My curious ears pricked up: "Who are you proposing to? A woman?"
Wei Xizi's body was covered with pink bubbles, and he hummed happily.
Under my intense questioning, Wei Xizi quickly surrendered and confessed everything. He said that he met a beautiful woman who was as graceful as a swan and as beautiful as a dragon at a flower party on New Year's Eve. The beautiful woman lost her hairpin, which happened to be picked up by Wei Xizi. The beautiful woman took the hairpin and smiled at him sweetly. Wei Xizi's young heart fell on the bank of Qujiang River.
"...She is as beautiful as a dream. Only after seeing her do you understand what it means to be so beautiful that one glance can captivate the whole country. Not to mention the beauties in the world, even the fairies in the sky cannot compare to a single hair of hers. If you have never seen her, you can't imagine it..." Wei Xizi recalled obsessively.
I ruthlessly broke his pink memories: "Don't even think about it. In Chang'an City, there are only three women as beautiful as you described: Xie Xiuniang from the Jiaofang Bureau, Su Xiangxue from Hongxiu Tower, and Wen Baibi from the family of Lord Wen, the Minister of the Chancellery. The first two are not serious people, and the latter is out of your reach."
Wei Xizi quickly shook his head and said, "Neither. She said her last name is Wang and she lives in Chongrenfang."
I immediately became alert and said, "Brother Xizi, you have to be careful. There aren't many beautiful ladies with a good reputation in Chang'an City. I've seen almost all of them. But the daughters of the Wang families in Chongrenfang are all plain-looking. Could she be a prostitute? Seeing that you serve the emperor and haven't married or had children yet, is she trying to seduce you?"
Seeing that he was as dumb as a turtle, I felt that I needed to explain to him the various tricks of the Chang'an market, so that he wouldn't get cheated and then cry to me to borrow money.
Wei Xizi wanted to say something else when Qingfu suddenly came to summon me, saying that the emperor had summoned me to accompany him in his studies and ordered me to report to my post immediately.
I had no choice but to make an appointment with Wei Xizi to talk again next time, and followed Qingfu away regretfully.
Until I started working, I was still thinking about Wei Xizi's affair. When Li Siyan talked to me, I was absent-minded.
"what's on your mind?"
I was hit on the forehead by a book. When I looked up, Li Siyan was looking at me lazily, with a collection of contemporary poems in his slender fingers.
I came back to my senses, gathered my sleeves, and said, "Nothing. Wei Xizi just said that he went to a poetry gathering in Qujiang on the Lantern Festival and met a stunningly beautiful woman. I was wondering how beautiful she was, and why Wei Xizi has been so dazed for the past few days."
Li Siyan asked with great interest, "Are you curious? How about I call her into the palace and show her to you?"
"You wanted to see it yourself, why are you pushing it onto me?" I rolled my eyes.
I just mentioned it casually, but I didn't expect Li Siyan to be really interested. He asked someone to check house by house according to the clues provided by Wei Xizi, and soon found the address of the beautiful woman. One morning in the first month of the lunar year, he summoned the woman to the palace for an audience.
When he issued this order, I was holding my sleeves tightly to keep warm, thinking that the dog emperor was really evil. After what he did, Wei Xizi no longer dared to dream about his fairy sister. A young boy's heart was broken just like that, which was really sad.
For two days in a row, every time I left the palace, I saw Wei Xizi facing the sunset, sadly reciting the three hundred classic poems that must be recited for a broken heart, such as "There are trees on the mountain and branches on the trees, my heart loves you but you don't know it"... I accidentally listened to it a few times and almost got my front teeth sour.
Wei Xizi's sadness over a broken heart reached its peak on the day the beauty entered the palace.
Huiyue told me that Li Siyan chose Qingsi Palace as the place for the audience.
As the name suggests, Qingsi Palace is located on the east side of Taiye Lake. It is very desolate and cold in winter.
On the morning of the audience, I trembled as I rose from my bed, followed the emperor's carriage to the Taiye Lake. Blowing into my palms, I cursed the emperor inwardly for being such a nuisance. Couldn't he just go off and chat with beautiful women about the stars and the moon and his ideal life? He had to call Wei Xizi and me over to watch them flirt with each other. What the hell!
Wei Xizi was also in a very complicated mood. On the one hand, he was very excited to see the woman he loved, but on the other hand, he was very sad that his sweetheart was going to become a queen.
I wanted to comfort him, but the northwest wind blowing today was from the Qilian Mountains, and it was too cold. I think people should be more compassionate to themselves.
Suddenly, Qingfu came from the front of the line and handed me an exquisite little hand warmer.
I was flattered and took it in my arms and said, "Wow, thank you Qingfu!"
Qingfu frowned and said coldly, "Why are you thanking me? This is given to you by His Majesty."
I immediately picked up the small hand warmer and examined it carefully. After confirming that it wasn't one of the ones Li Siyan usually used, I felt relieved and asked Qingfu, "Is this a gift for me, or are you just borrowing it for me?"
"You are so beautiful. This is prepared for Madam Wang. Remember to return it to Huiyue when you enter the palace later."
Qingfu rolled his eyes and turned away.
I put the hand warmer in my pocket and made a face at his back.
The damn old eunuch rolls his eyes every day, and he's not even afraid of eyelid cramps.
Finally reaching Qingsi Palace, I returned the hand warmer to Huiyue. Huiyue took it and said with a smile, "Your Majesty has not visited Qingsi Palace for a long time. Now that he has a rare visit, we servants must serve him well."
"Sister Huiyue is amazing," I flattered her and went into the side room with her. "Did you clean up everything here?"
"It's not just me. The Shanggong Bureau also sent a lady in charge." Hui Yue said, "In fact, it was just a simple cleanup. His Majesty suddenly said that he wanted to use this palace garden. We were caught off guard and had to deal with it in a hurry. We could only arrange it like this."
I casually said, "Qingsi, which sounds similar to Qingsi, is a good choice. His intentions are obvious to everyone. It's just that it's difficult for us servants. Not only do we have to renovate the house for him, but we also have to walk all the way from the Purple Palace to get here. It's so annoying."
Huiyue just smiled and didn't respond.
After waiting for about a cup of tea, the legendary celestial beauty arrived, surrounded by a group of palace maids and eunuchs, and walked into the palace gate.
The legendary beauty is about to appear on the stage, and everyone holds their breath, waiting for her.
Wei Xizi tried to remain calm, but his neck was noticeably stretched an inch, making him look like a baby bird waiting for food.
Before I saw her, the fragrance blew through the curtains. When I saw her for the first time through the curtains, I was so amazed that I exclaimed "wow" and covered my mouth with my hands unconsciously.
Oh my god, did I see a fairy?
Wei Xizi didn't lie to me. She was indeed a graceful and unparalleled beauty, with eyes like waves and skin like cream. She wore a red silk skirt that stretched to the ground, and her posture was as elegant as a crane in the water. Even if the three most beautiful women in Chang'an were tied together, they could not compare to this lady in front of me. She was truly a beauty that could captivate the whole country.
I thought excitedly: It’s settled, Li Siyan’s farewell to his virginity will be tonight.
The beauty walked into the inner hall with graceful steps, leaving only her graceful back.
We who were serving there were stunned for a long time, especially Wei Xizi. When he saw this beauty that day, she was dressed in ordinary clothes. Today, she was dressed in gorgeous clothes and looked even more gorgeous. Even we women were moved by her, let alone men.
I tugged at Huiyue's sleeve and asked, "What's her name? Is she from Chang'an?"
Huiyue, who was usually quiet, was absent-minded for a while. When I pulled her, she came back to her senses as if from a dream. She replied, "Her name is Wang Funiang. She is the lady sent by the Wang family of Langya. When we were having a drink on New Year's Eve, Xiaodie mentioned two ladies who were going to enter the palace, and she was one of them."
I was stunned: "Ah? Is there such a coincidence?"
Hui Yue said thoughtfully, "Who knows if it's just a coincidence? It's hard to say for sure when things happen like this."
I was stunned for a moment, then understood what she meant. Oh... it seems that the beauty is a very powerful one.
So the story is: Lady Wang first found out that Wei Xizi was a close minister of the emperor, then arranged an encounter with him, and finally attracted the emperor's interest and was recruited into the palace.
By doing this, she would be able to meet the emperor before the other woman from the Julu Wei family and catch the emperor's eye in advance. Li Siyan's harem was still empty. If she could pick the first peach, her position in the young emperor's heart would definitely not be low in the future.
Thinking of this, I became excited again. A powerful beauty is great! It would be best if I could eat a few bowls of flying vinegar and whisper in Li Siyan's ear to let me go early...
Just as I was lost in my imagination of the future, even imagining a hundred different ways to hug a beautiful woman's thighs, Qingfu appeared from behind me like a ghost and said sinisterly, "Mr. Shen, His Majesty wants you in."
Huiyue raised her eyebrows.
I was startled: "He must have called the wrong person."
Qingfu drooped his eyelids and said with disdain, "It's you, hurry in."
I said anxiously, "They're a perfect match, why would they want a monster like me to spoil the fun?"
Qingfu asked, "Do you want to go in by yourself, or have the guards carry you in?"
I thought of the brute force guards under Li Siyan, stamped my feet on the spot, and finally walked away reluctantly, looking back every few steps.
When he entered the room, the beautiful Wang Funiang was standing at the bottom of the hall with her head lowered, looking very graceful.
She had her back to me, revealing a patch of smooth white skin on the back of her neck, with a graceful curve and as bright as snow.
I unconsciously reached out and touched my neck, which was extremely stiff from years of writing at a desk. Comparing yourself with others is really frustrating.
Li Siyan was wearing a scarlet brocade robe today. I remember this robe. When I was called back to the Purple Palace from the Ye Ting a year ago, he met me wearing this robe.
But I particularly hate this bright red color. It always reminds me of the vermilion palace walls and my father's blood in the Xuanzheng Hall that day. Although almost a year has passed, I still remember that scene clearly.
He was talking to Wang Funiang with a smile, his tone kind and gentle, which was completely different from the lazy and casual manner when he talked to me.
Haha, man.
After I went in, I tiptoed to a corner and sat down, spreading out a piece of paper to record their conversation.
Although this is the job of the attendant, I always feel a little uncomfortable. How could an emperor go on a date with a beautiful woman with his attendant?
Wouldn't a normal emperor have dismissed all the palace maids and then done some unspeakable things on the dragon bed?
As I thought, I wrote quickly: The emperor asked Wang Funiang where she was from. Funiang smiled and replied that her ancestral home was Langya. She came to Chang'an last year and lived in Wang Xiang's house in Chongrenfang... The emperor asked Funiang how old she was and whether she was married. Funiang replied that she was sixteen and not engaged yet... The emperor asked Wang Funiang if she had ever read. Funiang replied that she could only read a few words and had read the Four Books and Five Classics, etc.... The emperor called Funiang forward.
Wang Funiang took two steps forward, raised her large, watery eyes slightly, and glanced boldly at the young king.
She was probably satisfied with her future husband, and a perfect blush appeared on her cheeks, making her look even more charming.
The woman is beautiful and the man is a dog, what an ill-matched couple.
This is the advantage of being a Jiudilang, you can watch the emperor's performance in the front row.
Just as I was enjoying the scene, Li Siyan suddenly said to Wang Funiang in a gentle voice, "My Lady, you misunderstood. I wanted to let Mr. Shen come forward."
As he spoke, he waved to me.
The joyful smile of eating melon froze on my face.
Wang Funiang was also stunned.
She followed Li Siyan's gaze, turned her head and looked at me, her eyes full of surprise and confusion.
Oh, a beauty is a beauty, she even bears being frightened so gracefully.
Seeing that I couldn't avoid it, I tried my best to force a sincere smile, carefully moved over to her, and greeted her.
Wang Funiang pursed her lips slightly and bowed to me.
I saw her white hands, like water scallions, gently raised, and she knelt down to bow to me with great grace. Her lips, painted with cherry-colored lipstick, opened and closed as she spoke, "Mr. Chen Qiju."
"Ah, Madam Wang, do you know me?" I scratched the back of my head embarrassedly.
Wang Funiang said gently, "I've heard the elders mention it before."
"oh……"
After saying that, she turned her head away, but I still couldn't help looking at her. She was so beautiful, and I naturally have a liking for beautiful women.
I rubbed against her again, trying to highlight her beauty with my ordinariness.
I want Li Siyan to know: A concubine is much more fun than a servant. Please play with your concubine more often and don't bother the servant who is forced to go to work.
I don’t know if he understood my good intentions. Li Siyan leaned against the top of the table, supporting his head with one hand and stroking his new white jade pendant inlaid with gold with the other.
From what I observed, he likes gold jewelry very much, which is a typical nouveau riche aesthetic. Perhaps he didn't see any good things when he was a child, so when he grew up, his aesthetic taste only knew how to appreciate gold and jade, which is very vulgar.
After playing with it for a while, he put down the gold jade pendant and asked me with a pleasant face, "Chen Ying, what do you think of Lady Wang?"
He asked lightly and naturally, which startled Wang Funiang beside me and made her breath disordered. I could almost hear the sound of her heart beating wildly. When I glanced over, I saw that her body was trembling weakly. I couldn't tell whether she was happy or afraid.
But I don’t understand why the dog emperor asked for my opinion when he was taking a concubine for himself. He wasn’t choosing a wife for me.
"What do you mean, Your Majesty?" I asked him directly. "I've only met Madam Wang once. How can I directly judge her?"
Li Siyan said lazily, "You have a really bad memory. Didn't you say that day that you wanted to know what she looked like? It was because of you that I summoned her into the palace. Now that I've seen her today, I want to ask you what you think."
What?
My pupils dilated and I went crazy.
It's none of my business! You were the one who forced him into the palace!
I watched helplessly as Wang Funiang's gentle and honest expression collapsed in an instant. She seemed to have suffered a great humiliation, her whole body was trembling, and her big eyes were full of resentment. "Look, the Dog Emperor is looking at me again." I guess what she wanted to express was: Great, it turns out you two are in the same group!
I'm not, I don't have any! I was almost going crazy, shouting at the top of my voice, "Your Majesty, how can you say such nonsense! I only mentioned it briefly that day, and you rushed off looking for someone. You are so lustful, why do you have to put the blame on me?"
Then he said to Fu Niang, "Don't be afraid, Madam Wang. He really loves your color, but he just doesn't dare to admit it. All men are like this. They care about face."
Li Siyan smiled: "You know quite a lot, and you also know that men love face."
But Wang Funiang was not appeased by me. When she heard me speak so brazenly to Li Siyan, the beautiful woman's pupils shrank in fear. She immediately knelt on the ground, moving her beautiful lips and crying, "Funiang has offended Your Majesty. Please punish me!"
I groaned and wanted to pull her back: "It was me who bumped into His Majesty. Why are you kneeling? The ground is cold. Don't hurt your knees..."
Li Siyan laughed out loud, it was the first time in more than half a year that he laughed so happily.
He's still laughing, he's still laughing! I looked up angrily and said, "What are you doing? If you like her, why don't you just marry her? Why are you pretending to ask me? You scared Madam Wang like this and you're still laughing. How could you bear it?"
"You are the only one by my side, who else should I ask if not you?"
He spoke the most shocking and ferocious words in the most matter-of-fact tone.
"Ask Huiyue Suxing and the others! What the harem affairs have to do with me!"
Wang Funiang's body swayed again, her face turned pale, and she looked at me in disbelief, her expression dazed, as if she was forcing herself to digest the magical facts she had witnessed today.
Li Siyan stopped laughing and said thoughtfully, "From what you said, you want me to marry her?"
I was puzzled and said, "Why do you have to drag me into this?"
Li Siyan waved his hand and said to Wang Funiang, "You go down first."
I glared at him, lowered my head to help the beauty, turned around and left, and Li Siyan suddenly said behind me:
"Chen Ying, you stay."
Finally, Wang Funiang walked out of the hall alone, while I was ruthlessly detained by the dog emperor.
The dog emperor circled around me twice. Perhaps because he had just seen a beautiful woman, he was in a particularly good mood. He even had the energy to coax me. He came up to me with a smile and asked, "How is it? Are you satisfied?"
I wrinkled my nose, took two steps back, and said disdainfully, "I see His Majesty is quite satisfied."
Are you not satisfied? The voice is so soft that it seems to squeeze out water.
He leisurely walked to the corner where I had just sat, picked up the draft of my daily notes, glanced at it for a few seconds, and then stuffed the draft back into my hands. He said lazily, "You're right. She is indeed a beauty, and she has been taught so well. It seems that the Wang family has put a lot of effort into her."
I recalled Wang Funiang's words and actions, and felt that what Li Siyan said made sense. The Wang family must have invited a retired palace maid from the inner courtyard who was in charge of etiquette to teach Funiang, so that a daughter from a branch family in the countryside could be taught to be more elegant than the ladies in Chang'an.
I asked in confusion, "If Your Majesty doesn't want to keep her, why did you summon her into the palace?"
Li Siyan smiled and pinched my face: "Didn't you say you wanted to see her?"
"You're kidding me." I slapped his hand away and glared at him, "If you don't want to talk about it, forget it. Don't bring me up and offend others."
He wasn't angry after I hit him. He reached out and continued to pinch my face, saying with a smile, "Then tell me, how did I offend anyone by using you?"
"I'm not stupid. You want to use me to kill Wang's pride, right? She went to great lengths to find you and plot against you. Of course, you can't just marry her, but you don't want to really offend the Wang family, so I'll be the raft."
I said a long string of words in one breath, feeling deeply that I was extremely smart and had seen through Li Siyan's conspiracy.
Li Siyan pretended to be surprised and said, "When did you grow a brain? How come I didn't know?"
"I haven't finished yet. A weak woman like her may not be able to accomplish these things. Since she will enter the palace sooner or later and His Majesty is satisfied with her, why not marry her as soon as possible? The sooner you marry her, the sooner you can enjoy her." I struck while the iron was hot.
"Enjoy what?"
"...with the fragrance of red sleeves, drinking wine and discussing history," I counted on my fingers: "The joy of the boudoir is beyond words."
He shouldn't ask me this kind of question. He should ask those married ministers. I'm sure everyone can provide a whole book of 18+ material.
Wang Funiang has her methods, and I have my own plans. I wish she could enter the palace earlier so that the dog emperor can do what he should do at night, and not always make me accompany him to read and paint.
The job of accompanying his son to study is too tiring. I often need to answer the stupid questions raised by the dog emperor that make no sense. He only started to learn at the age of ten, and his literary foundation is very weak. He can't even read slightly obscure books, which makes it very painful for me to act as a human annotator.
And once I failed to control my expression and showed something like "Idiot, how come you don't even know this?", he would sarcastically mock me, and then we would look at each other and not say a word the whole night.
Once we had a big quarrel and he was so angry that he wanted to punish me by making me pour out the night incense again. I had already packed my things to go to the Ye Ting for vacation that night, but I didn’t expect the dog emperor to suddenly enter my room, kick over my newly packed luggage, scold me for being ignorant, short-sighted and stupid, and then walked away without any guilt, leaving me alone with a rage that I had nowhere to vent.
I urgently need Wang Funiang to help me disperse the fire.
After hearing my advice to him to marry Wang Fu Niang, Li Siyan's smile faded and his face turned cold.
"It seems that you are really smart. You hope that since I have someone in my harem, I won't bother you at night?" Li Siyan said coldly, and the hand that pinched my face suddenly exerted force.
I hissed in pain, not daring to tell the truth. I said, feeling guilty, "I didn't mean that... I just saw how beautiful the princess was, and I couldn't bear to see her sad, so I wanted Your Majesty to fulfill her wish."
Li Siyan sneered: "You really think about her."
I simply stopped talking.
The matter of taking concubines into the harem is inextricably linked to the previous dynasty. A control freak like Li Siyan must have his own ideas. My advice is useless and will only make him unhappy.
Sure enough, after pinching my face for a while, Li Siyan consciously let go of my face and threw the diary I had just written into the charcoal brazier. He said lightly: "Okay, this time it's just a warning to the Wang family. My agreement to marry their daughter does not mean condoning their many tricks."
After he finished burning the daily records, he turned around and looked at me. His eyes were like a bunch of small ice chips, piercing my body.
"As for you, don't have any evil thoughts. Just be a good attendant to me. I won't let you down."
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