[Silent Thunder and the Long Plum Rain]
The only sound in the ward was the regular ticking of the instruments, mixed with the sound of rain falling outside the window.
Si Qi gripped Shao Wei's cool hand tightly, not daring to press with his fingertips, as if he were holding a piece of glass about to shatter. He rested his forehead against their clasped hands. The Alpha pheromones were no longer aggressive, but gently and persistently enveloped the person on the bed. The fresh, rain-like scent of cedar responded faintly but tenaciously.
After an unknown amount of time, Si Qi felt the fingers in his palm move slightly.
He raised his head suddenly and met Shao Wei's slowly opening eyes. Those eyes still carried the haziness and fatigue of someone just waking from a coma, but the sharpness deep within seemed to be slightly neutralized by something soft.
"...Siqi?" Shao Wei's voice was so hoarse that it was almost inaudible.
"I'm here." Si Qi immediately leaned forward, dipped a cotton swab in water, and carefully moistened his chapped lips. "Don't rush to talk. You fainted and are in the hospital now."
Shao Wei's gaze slowly shifted, landing on Si Qi's rolled-up sleeves, the unwiped blood on his arm, and the IV needle on the back of his own hand. He closed his eyes, then opened them again, much clearer. "Temporary marking?" he asked, his tone devoid of emotion.
"The match is 98.7%." Si Qi's voice was trembling slightly, and he choked with sobs after surviving a disaster.
"The doctor said your pheromone system is broken. This is the only way to delay it." He added anxiously, afraid that Shao Wei would see this as another act of coercion or pity. "I beg you, Shao Wei, don't refuse. Even if it's just to... to give me a little more time."
Shao Wei looked at him in silence, his gaze fixed on Si Qi's reddened eyes and the new stubble on his chin. He had never seen Si Qi so disheveled, so unconcealed. Si Qi used to be perfect, noble, and in control, but now he looked like a child afraid of being abandoned.
"Lavender..." Shao Wei suddenly said softly.
Si Qi was stunned for a moment, then he remembered the bouquet of flowers that he had hastily left in the living room: "I'll buy you a lot tomorrow."
Shao Wei shook his head very slightly, almost imperceptibly, "That day...it smelled really good."
A surge of bitterness and hope suddenly slammed into Siqi's heart. He understood. Shao Wei remembered him going out to pick lavender, and the clumsy things he'd tried to do. He lowered his head and buried his face in the crook of Shao Wei's neck, greedily breathing in the faint scent of cedar mixed with his own, and muttered, "I'm sorry... and thank you."
Thank you for remembering, thank you for being alive, thank you for giving me a chance.
Shao Wei didn't push him away, but simply closed his eyes wearily. The temporary marking brought more than just physical relief; it also provided a deep, instinctive bond and comfort derived from pheromones, something that couldn't be replaced by medication.
He could feel the cautious pain and cherishment in Siqi's pheromones, and the defenses of his heart, which had been hardened for many years, cracked into a tiny crack at this moment.
After three days of observation at the hospital, Shao Wei insisted on returning home. The doctor's warning was still fresh in his mind: temporary marking was only a stopgap measure, not a cure, and the ultimate course of the disease remained uncertain. Siqi mobilized all resources, inviting top experts from around the world for a remote consultation, and the conclusions reached were largely the same.
Home seems to be the only sense of reality that can be grasped.
After returning, Shao Wei seemed to have undergone some inexplicable changes. He was still silent, but no longer completely closed.
He would sit in front of the floor-to-ceiling window filled with sunlight and listen to the Chopin nocturnes bought by Siqi, and would take nibbles of the mango ice cream that Siqi had tried to make, which was still not very successful. Occasionally, when Siqi worked late at night, a cup of coffee at a suitable temperature would be quietly placed at the door of the study.
Siqi cherishes every tiny signal.
He no longer "pursues" her as eagerly as he did at the beginning, but learns to truly "accompany" her.
When Shao Wei was reading, he would take a book of his own and sit on the sofa not far away to read quietly; he would close the windows in advance on rainy days, leaving only a gap so that Shao Wei could hear the sound of rain that he liked without catching a cold; he learned massage techniques, and when Shao Wei was tormented by illness and unable to fall asleep, he patiently helped him relieve muscle soreness.
One night, Siqi was awakened by a suppressed cough coming from the guest room.
He rushed over and found Shao Wei curled up on the bed, his face pale, his forehead covered in cold sweat, and his breathing rapid and difficult.
"Where's the medicine?" Si Qi's voice was tense as he skillfully searched for the medicine bottle on the bedside table.
Shao Wei grabbed his wrist, his fingertips cold, and shook his head: "...I've used it once, it's not time yet."
Without a word, Si Qi lifted him up, blanket and all, and scooped him up into his arms. He released soothing pheromones, the scent of rain-soaked cedar gradually growing stronger, gently enveloping Shao Wei. His hands gently patted Shao Wei's back, like coaxing a child.
"Breathe, Shao Wei, breathe with me." Si Qi guided in a low voice, his chest pressed tightly against Shao Wei's back, allowing him to feel the rhythm of his breathing.
The violent panting slowly subsided, and Shao Wei leaned weakly against Si Qi's arms, his pajamas soaked with cold sweat. Neither of them spoke, the air filled only with the interweaving of pheromones and the sounds of their gradually synchronized heartbeats.
"...It's very ugly, isn't it?" After a long moment, Shao Wei's voice rang out softly, with a hint of self-mockery, "This look."
Si Qi tightened his arms and rested his chin on the top of Shao Wei's head. "No." His voice was firm but gentle. "The way you fight never leaves me without looking away."
Before, it was a quiet battle, now it is a direct confrontation with fate. Both are equally dazzling.
Shao Wei seemed stunned, his body stiffening slightly for a moment, then slowly and completely relaxing, letting his weight rest on the embrace behind him. This was a small, yet significant act of trust.
The next day, Si Qi didn't go to the office; all meetings were held online. In the afternoon, he worked on his laptop while Shao Wei dozed off on the sofa beside him. The sun shone warmly, and Si Qi occasionally looked up to see Shao Wei's brows, slightly furrowed in his sleep, gradually soften.
Suddenly, Shao Wei's phone, which had been placed beside him, vibrated. Si Qi glanced at it subconsciously and saw that the caller ID showed an unfamiliar name, but with the suffix "Doctor" at the end.
Shao Wei also woke up. When he saw the caller ID, his face changed slightly. He quickly picked up the phone, glanced at Si Qi, then got up and walked towards the balcony.
Si Qi's heart sank. A bad premonition gripped him. He respected Shao Wei's privacy and had never checked his medical records for details, relying on his attending physician for all his information. But Shao Wei's momentary nervousness and evasion made him unable to ignore it.
A few minutes later, Shao Wei came back from the balcony, his face paler than before, with a complex, almost resolute look in his eyes.
"Who's calling?" Si Qi put down his laptop and tried to sound calm.
Shao Wei didn't look at him. He just walked to the window and turned his back to Si Qi: "A friend."
"Shao Wei." Si Qi walked up behind him, "Tell me the truth. No matter what it is, we will face it together."
Shao Wei's shoulders trembled slightly. He turned around and looked at Si Qi. His lake-like eyes were now bottomless. "Si Qi, thank you for this month. But I hope... this is the end."
"What do you mean?" Si Qi's heart suddenly sank.
"The temporary marking is very effective. I feel much better." Shao Wei's tone was calm, almost cruel. "But the doctor said it's just a delay. The fundamental problem between us hasn't been resolved. Everything you did is good, really. But perhaps it's more out of responsibility and the instinct brought about by the marking..."
"No!" Si Qi interrupted him and grabbed his shoulders, "You can clearly feel it! That's not instinct!"
"What is that?" Shao Wei looked up at him, his eyes sharp. "Is it love? Siqi, love can't be proven by a month of elaborate performances. I don't have much time left, and I don't want to... I don't want to end up living in a dream woven out of sympathy and guilt. That would be more tragic than dying alone."
Si Qi looked at Shao Wei and suddenly understood. That phone call... was definitely more than just a notification of his condition. Shao Wei was afraid, afraid that this hard-earned warmth would be fleeting, afraid that if he indulged himself, he would face deeper despair. So he chose to personally cut it off before he was abandoned again.
A cold anger and great heartache swept over Si Qi. This time, he was not angry because he was misunderstood, but because Shao Wei would rather bear everything alone than trust him again.
He suddenly pulled Shao Wei into his arms and kissed him fiercely regardless of his struggle.
This kiss was no longer the gentle, tentative one from the beginning. It was filled with predatory, possessive desire, yet also carried with it unspeakable pain and despair. Si Qi exhausted all his strength to express emotions that words could not contain. His pheromones surged violently, like a stormy ocean, forcibly enveloping the cedar forest that tried to retreat.
Shao Wei initially resisted, but his weakened body and the profound effects of the mark gradually wore him out. He could feel Si Qi trembling and tasted a salty liquid—he couldn't tell if it was his own tears or Si Qi's.
After a long time, Si Qi finally let him go, resting his forehead against Shao Wei's, panting, and said word by word:
"Shao Wei, listen to me. I'm not acting, nor am I being controlled by instinct. I love you not because you're dying, but because I almost lost you forever! I don't care what was said on that phone call. Even if you try to push me away, I won't let go."
His voice was low and hoarse, with unquestionable firmness:
"Do you think death can separate us? You're wrong. Even if there's only a day or an hour left, don't try to escape me with the excuse of 'for my own good'. You must let me fight this battle with you to the end. This is an order, Shao Wei, as your spouse."
Shao Wei stared at him blankly, his pupils trembling violently. His tense expression, which had been trying to remain indifferent, finally shattered completely, revealing the deep-seated fragility and unbelievable hope underneath.
Si Qi's thumb brushed across the corners of his wet eyes, and his tone finally softened, pleading:
"Don't give up on me, Shao Wei. Don't give up on yourself either. Trust me once, one last time, okay?"
The sound of rain outside the window became heavier again, hitting the glass like a rapid heartbeat, or a ritual to cleanse everything.
Surrounded by the sound of rain, two clear lines of tears finally fell slowly on Shao Wei's pale face. He closed his eyes and nodded very lightly.
It was as if a heavy burden had been lifted, and as if the only life-saving straw had finally been grasped.
Si Qi hugged him tightly, as if he wanted to rub him into his own bones and blood.
The rain was still falling, but this time, they leaned on each other and listened together to this unknown but no longer lonely rhythm.
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