Those neat penmanships concealed her restrained yet surging love, which was like a sharp scalpel, cutting a bloody wound in his pretended calm heart.
"Fu Hanzhou, I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye to you in person..."
He murmured the first sentence, his voice hoarse and rough.
The memory suddenly went back to last night. She curled up in his arms, her flushed face pressed against his chest, and whispered, "Will the jade pendant bless lovers to finally get married?"
At that time, he thought it was just an ordinary tenderness, but now he realized that she had been counting down and turning every second into a farewell.
He slammed his fist against the table, and the falling paper ashes floated on the words "2046". From then on, that distant future became the other side that he could never reach.
When he read "You are not mine, so I will give you back to someone else", Fu Hanzhou's heart suddenly ached violently, and his clenched teeth tasted like rust in his mouth.
His hands tightly gripped the diary, the creases on the edge still bore traces of her repeated flipping through it, but now they were like scabbed wounds, reminding him of the fact that she had left. It turned out that she had already completely erased herself from his world between the lines.
"Like a moth to a flame..."
His voice broke into sobs, and the scalding liquid splashed onto the paper, blurring the words "If I had a second chance, I would still rush towards you like a moth to a flame."
Fu Hanzhou buried his face in the diary. The rough touch of the fabric brushed against his cheek, but it couldn't wipe away the overflowing hot liquid.
"Love you Qin Ying" turned into a vague mist in the tears, just like her gradually disappearing traces.
He reached into his pocket tremblingly—the dragon and phoenix were still there, the jade was cool and warm, but it could no longer reflect her smiling eyes.
"Even saying goodbye has to be hidden behind paper... 2046... What kind of place is that?"
The veins on his hand that was holding the jade pendant were bulging, and his palm was painful from the impact of the dragon and phoenix.
The wind outside the window blew dead leaves against the window frame. He suddenly raised his head and growled at the empty room:
"Qin Ying, you said you wouldn't leave..."
The roar broke into an echo on the wall, and Fu Hanzhou suddenly became quiet.
He gently placed the jade pendant on his lips, as if he had kissed her slightly cool fingertips, but his movements stopped the moment he touched the jade - there was no longer any warmth from her there.
He lowered his head and stroked the phoenix pattern on the jade pendant with his fingertips again and again. His eyes fell on the last sentence in the diary: "Take care of yourself." The handwriting was wrinkled by tears, but it was like an order engraved into the bone marrow.
He knew that these letters with questions contained the traces of her disappearance and his crazy thoughts of breaking through time and space.
When he stood up clutching the diary, the shoulder straps of his military uniform shone brightly in the sunlight. He would never give up this pursuit across time and space.
At the same time, Wei Zhuolan stumbled back to his family's blue brick building, his gold-rimmed glasses hanging crookedly on the bridge of his nose.
He pushed open the carved wooden door and Chen Shuyun came out of the kitchen carrying a celadon bowl. The crisp sound of the bowls colliding broke the silence but could not call back his fixed gaze.
"Zhuo Lan, what are you doing..."
"Don't come over here!"
He growled and lunged towards the bedroom.
In the desk drawer, the glaring red rubber band was still lying quietly in the velvet box. His Adam's apple rolled violently, and he grabbed the rubber band and wrapped it around his wrist with trembling hands. His fingertips repeatedly stroked the fine hairs on the rubber band, as if he could still touch the softness of her black hair.
The corners of the briefing booklet at the bottom were curled up and frayed. He took a deep breath and slowly opened it.
Qin Ying in the newspaper was wearing a white Dacron shirt, smiling at the camera with curved eyebrows, her eyes bright, as if she was looking at him through the paper.
The lead type next to the photo neatly read "Top scorer in the college entrance examination - a proud daughter of heaven."
Seeing how distraught he looked, Chen Shuyun quietly walked behind him.
"Zhuo Lan?"
A voice suddenly rang out:
"What's wrong? What happened?"
Wei Zhuolan's thoughts were interrupted. Just as he was about to close the briefing, he heard Chen Shuyun continue to ask doubtfully:
"Why are you staring at an empty notebook?"
He looked up suddenly and saw his mother leaning closer with a frown on her face, her well-maintained fingers hovering above the photo in the briefing, and only the blank page reflected in her pupils.
His hand froze, and he suddenly raised the briefing in front of Chen Shuyun:
"Empty notebook?"
He suddenly felt cold all over and stood up:
"You really can't see the people and words above?"
Chen Shuyun was wearing a dark gray khaki smock, and her permed curly hair was neatly tied behind her head.
She frowned and pushed her son's hand away, her movements full of her usual majesty.
"Nonsense! You're the head of the publicity department now. How can you yell at a blank piece of paper?"
Her fingertips brushed across the paper, which felt as smooth as a mirror, and for the first time, genuine confusion appeared in her eyes.
But this confusion was quickly suppressed:
"I don't care about you and that..."
She paused, as if she couldn't remember the name "Qin Ying":
"Anyway, stop doing these things! Just be a good date with Fu Hanting."
"Dating?"
He seemed to have heard a joke, and approached his mother with red eyes:
"Have you forgotten who brought people to the publishing house and forced her to..."
"Who are you forcing?"
Chen Shuyun suddenly interrupted, her brows knitted into knots:
"What the hell are you talking about? Anyway, just behave yourself..."
“That’s enough!”
Wei Zhuolan suddenly shook off his mother's hand, and the briefing fell to the ground:
"You don't remember anything, do you?!"
Chen Shuyun's face darkened instantly, and the veins on the back of her hands twitched slightly - that was her usual expression of anger.
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