Chapter 30: The Art of Getting Along with Others
There were a lot of fortune-telling customers for several days in a row, and it was not until the beginning of September that I had time to teach Chun about personality types.
It was a very heavy rainy day, with thunder and lightning. There were very few people walking on the streets.
I told Chun that no one would come today. The rain was so heavy, with thunder and lightning, that most people were afraid to walk, and even cars were rare.
Therefore, no matter what the situation is, I will tell you about the remaining four types today.
Chunlai was very happy and took out his notebook to start recording.
I will start talking about the seventh personality type——[Leadership Personality]
The characteristics of this type of person are as follows:
1. It is not important whether others like him or not. What is important to him is to gain the respect of others.
Second, they have strong cohesion. Some excellent qualities are innate. You are born with the ability to dominate others, and you can never learn it.
3. Likes to take the lead, be a leader, and enjoys leading a team. He has shown outstanding organizational skills since childhood.
4. Extremely confident. Never flinch.
5. Don’t mind conflicts, not afraid of fighting with others, and like to do big things.
6. Be straightforward in your work and like to help others.
Chunlai nodded: "He's the kind of person with a bad temper."
"Yes, a bad temper is a sign of great ability. But the exception is people who have a stupid temper.
Common speaking styles include: getting straight to the point, not being particular about details, being forthright, easily irritable, and sticking to one's own opinions.
Chunlai asked: "What are the shortcomings of this kind of person?"
"Arbitrary and thoughtful."
Chunlai asked again: "What should I pay attention to when getting along with such people?"
I said, "If you also have a leadership personality, then you will never be able to work with him. It's like saying there can't be two tigers on the same mountain. If you are a relatively indecisive, peaceful person, then you should follow this kind of person."
Usually pay attention to the following art of getting along:
Respect his right to make independent decisions.
Express yourself honestly and truthfully. Don't hide anything. He has the insight to see through people's hearts. Remember, don't lie.
Don't argue with him face to face. It's better to offer suggestions when he is calm.
Either stay away from him or stay loyal to him and avoid betraying him halfway.
Chun said, "I remember it."
Next, I will tell Chun about the eighth type of personality—the Buddha-like personality.
This type of person never fights for anything. Their personality traits are as follows:
Value the harmony of interpersonal relationships.
Not distinguishing right from wrong, and sometimes not sticking to principles.
Hesitant.
Be passive.
Failure to distinguish between primary and secondary issues when dealing with problems.
Lack of independent thinking and easily distracted.
The way of speaking is slow and unhurried, with a flat tone and more lazy tones.
Chunlai asked, "What is lazy music?"
Lazy sound is a non-active pause, which means there are more sighs. Common pause words: Alas!
"Then how can I get along with such a person?"
It doesn't matter if we're just friends; he won't hurt you anyway. But everyone has their own dignity, so be careful not to ridicule him excessively in public.
Avoid conflicts, because once his bottom line is touched, his revenge will be unprecedentedly severe.
When you talk to him, you can also slow down your speech speed. In his eyes, this is a negotiation and a calm tone.
After explaining the eighth type, I told him about the ninth personality type - [Intelligent Personality]
This kind of person is very smart.
There are two kinds of intelligence: manual intelligence and mental intelligence.
Being smart with hands, of course, also means being smart with the brain, but that doesn't necessarily mean they'll be good at studying or getting good grades. It's primarily about having strong hands-on skills. They won't become philosophers, scientists, or artists, but they will become experts in a certain field.
This is what we call a craftsman-type person.
No matter what industry you are in, there are always some people who are good at hands-on work. For example, chefs, gardeners, carpenters, welders, etc. Even painting, calligraphy...
Chunlai stopped me and asked, "Are calligraphers and painters not artists?"
I shook my head. "An artist must be creative and have literary qualities. Most calligraphers and painters are just good at writing and painting, but they can't be called artists."
Then I told him about "brain intelligence," which means being exceptionally intelligent. This type of person is different from someone with a "thinking personality." He's not only intelligent, but also very good at interpersonal relationships.
Therefore, the personality of the [Intelligent] type is:
The key is to be able to bend and stretch. He knows that "softness can overcome hardness" and that "assess the situation and be strong when necessary and firm when necessary."
When it comes to getting along, you should look for this kind of person as a friend. Either he or she is highly accomplished in a particular area, so you can learn from him or she has profound insights when analyzing problems.
He is good at handling interpersonal relationships and is the best mediator.
Finally, I will talk to Chun about the tenth personality type - [Perfectionist Personality]
Personality traits:
They have a clear distinction between right and wrong. They are very principled and difficult to compromise. They like to stick to their own standards. However, if they do make a mistake, they will admit it and correct it.
I have very high demands on myself and am capable of self-reflection.
Be strict with yourself and be strict with others.
Focus on details and ignore the overall situation.
Don't praise others easily.
Dare to challenge authority.
The principles for dealing with this kind of people are:
If he is your superior or an elder, you can make mistakes, but you must accept criticism and correct your mistakes. Be punctual, rigorous, and keep your promises.
If you are a friend, you can advise: the world is not perfect.
In short, it is always beneficial to get along with such a person, even if he is strict with you.
Chunlai didn't speak for a long time. After sitting for a while, he started to speak.
I said, "What are you afraid of? If you have any different opinions, you can express them."
Chun said, "Master, I think what you said makes sense, but it's not absolute. We can't divide people into ten types. Some people have both this type of personality and other types."
I gave a thumbs up and said:
"In spring, you have matured and become more thoughtful. But I want to tell you this:
No matter how many personalities a person has, there is always one personality that is the main form of expression. Ninety percent of the time, he will show his main personality.
What I want to tell you is this: in any matter, you must grasp the main aspect of the contradiction. If you can't grasp the core personality of a person through its main manifestations, you are not qualified for our job.
Chunlai's body trembled.
At this time, a person came in. This person was my good friend Lu Yu.
She said, "Teacher Wan, many years ago, I asked you to talk about the [Li Fire Luck]. Some people understood it, while others didn't. You are also aware of the current economic situation.
A large group of people have asked me to invite you again and ask you to tell them in more detail what kind of business is available.
I smiled and said, "Since Sister Yu invites me, I will definitely come."
She said, "When are you free?"
I said, "The day after tomorrow, you also need to send out a notice."
Lu Yu said, "Okay, it's a deal then."
Having written this far, my next thing is to talk about my personal thoughts for next year and the future as requested by Sister Yu.
There is a lingering aftertaste of idle chatter,
I always write extra chapters in a hurry.
The beauty of April has faded,
The peach blossoms in the mountain temple are in full bloom.
How many people know the fragrance of my heart?
I just think that novels are all about rice and wheat.
There has always been a drizzle of rain,
I feel lonely and far away from home.
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