Chapter 151
"Brother Zhao, did you hear what I said?"
Nan Yan seemed not to notice his abnormality and shook his arm naturally.
For a moment, Zhao Xiuyan really wanted to kiss her recklessly, press her down, and do all kinds of bad things to her that he could think of.
But there was a trace of clarity in his mind. He clenched his fingers tightly, pursed his thin lips, and then pulled his wrist away from her hand. He said to Nan Yan in a hoarse voice, "Go, get out, don't touch me, go away, hurry up."
If he doesn't leave now, he really won't be able to control himself.
Nan Yan understood in her heart, but pretended not to know.
It's easy to guess Zhao Xiuyan's condition. He must have fallen into the trap of the flower thief. Oh my, she can't let go of such a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
This guy is too restrained. Without some drastic measures, it would be impossible for him to recognize and sort out his feelings so quickly. Who knows how long it will take for him to truly understand his own thoughts?
She didn't have that much time to play house with him, so since this was a rare opportunity, she naturally wanted to play it well.
Nan Yan seemed to be a little dazed by his distant and resistant attitude. She showed a puzzled and puzzled look in her eyes, and reached out to hold his arm, "Senior Brother Zhao, what's wrong with you?"
"Were you injured in the fight just now?"
Even though she had been lying in bed unable to move because of the acupuncture points she had just received, there was so much noise outside that it was impossible for her not to hear a single sound.
Thinking of this, she started to worry about the wound on his body again. She subconsciously touched his chest with her hand, and then asked nervously, "Is the wound on your chest opened again? Does it hurt? Why is your forehead sweating?"
As she spoke, she rolled up her sleeves and gently wiped his forehead. Because Nan Yan touched and approached him without any precautions, the subtle fragrance and cool touch made him unconsciously let out a low, light hum, which inexplicably brought a hint of pleasure and embarrassment.
He tried hard to suppress the thoughts in his mind, and his lips were bitten. Bright red blood seeped out of his skin and slid down his white chin.
His eyebrows were cold and restrained, and he looked at people with pretended indifference. The bright red blood beads made his usually gentle and jade-like face inexplicably look a bit evil.
Zhao Xiuyan's fingers began to tremble uncontrollably. He bit his lip, a dark look in his eyes. He suddenly stretched out his hand and pressed Nan Yan, who was beside him, down onto the bed.
The other party was stunned, and his expression instantly turned into surprise and astonishment.
I don’t know what’s wrong with him, but she doesn’t seem to be thinking about anything else. Her watery eyes are looking at him with such dependence and trust.
"Brother Zhao, what happened to you today? Are you feeling unwell? Do you want me to take you to see a doctor?"
Zhao Xiuyan came to his senses again after seeing that look. He felt like he was going crazy and was really about to lose control.
His hand was on her shoulder, and there was a heat in his palm, like a lover rubbing his ear to hers. He slowly touched her wrist, then pulled hard and pulled her up again.
The expression on his face was a mixture of pain and endurance, and he was in agony but could not express it. Then he pushed her hard, his lips trembling slightly, and looked at her with a pleading look, "Go, Yanyan, please go quickly. Don't look at me like that."
When he said this, the veins on his neck emerged and throbbed violently. I don't know how much restraint he had to finally take his hands away from her, and then forcefully pushed away the person next to him.
He didn't want to hurt her, let alone do this to her without her knowing anything and being on guard.
Oh, you wish! Can you let the duck that is in your mouth fly away?
So Nan Yan started pretending again.
But you still have to be careful and not show your true colors.
As a lady from a noble family who had never experienced such things, Nan Yan's eyes showed a look of confusion again. Although she didn't understand anything, she could tell from the other person's slightly trembling eyelashes that he was in a very bad condition at the moment.
Nan Yan pursed her lips, seeming a little worried, but also vaguely aware that something was wrong, so she stood up obediently, and then backed away while talking to him, "Zhao, Zhao, don't worry, I, I'll go find someone to come over, I'll find your junior brother, he will definitely be able to help you."
As she spoke, she turned and walked away, not noticing that the person behind her had darkened his eyes again. As a result, she ran to the door and when she pushed it, she discovered that the door seemed to be locked from the outside.
Well, that's good. Even if the door was not locked, she would find an excuse to run back. Now that the door is locked, she doesn't have to find an excuse.
Nan Yan's eyes showed an anxious look. She pulled the bolt hard and finally saw a chain on the door ring through the crack. Then she turned her head to look at Zhao Xiuyan and said with a slightly embarrassed tone, "Brother, this door is locked and can't be opened. What should I do if I can't get out?"
Hearing this, Zhao Xiuyan's body completely froze. He turned his head, not knowing what expression to show for a moment. He supported his body, breathed rapidly, and walked quickly to Nan Yan's side. Then he pulled the bolt hard and heard the sound of chains coming from outside.
For the first time, he regretted not killing the flower thief right away. After being injured, the man must have pretended to run away, but when he was not aware of it, he sneaked back and locked the door when the drug took effect. What should he do? What should he do now? He was losing control. If he continued like this, he would definitely hurt her.
A strong murderous intent surged in Zhao Xiuyan's heart. He would never let this damn flower thief go. No matter where he escaped, he would chase him to the end.
But that was not the most important thing at the moment. The most important thing now was Yanyan. He had been tricked by such a despicable trick and was locked in the same room with her. Could he really endure it? He had clearly been...
Thinking of this, his body was flooded with waves of emotions, and his cheeks were flushed with red because of this turbid thought. He gripped the door bolt tightly, and the force became tighter and tighter, so tight that his body ached. This pain was accompanied by an extremely unbearable heat that he wanted to release, but he had nowhere to release it.
Zhao Xiu turned his head and looked at Nan Yan beside him consciously. Yanyan was looking at him with confusion. Her eyes seemed a little uneasy. It was unclear whether she was worried about his physical abnormality or her current situation.
She seemed to hesitate for a moment, then took a cautious step back, perhaps with some kind of small animal's natural intuition about danger, while she secretly glanced at his facial expression.
Zhao Xiuyan tried harder and harder to suppress the wanton thoughts in his heart. He felt that the fire in his body was about to burn him to death and was about to burn away his sanity.
The impulses in his body that were about to drive him crazy and the last bit of rationality in his mind were entangled with each other, trying to determine who was superior, and he was about to lose control completely.
On the one hand, the restlessness in her body told her that she was standing there, she had no ability to resist, and he could do whatever he wanted to her.
Didn't he think about it a long time ago? Didn't he have other plans for her a long time ago? Why did he still have to endure it? Why did he still pretend to be a righteous gentleman and maintain a superficial indifferent relationship?
Do you want to see her with your junior brother? Do you want her to call you senior brother like your junior brother?
Don't you want to see the beautiful body wrapped in the thin clothes? Don't you want to feel it with your own hands? Besides, didn't you see it that night? You saw it clearly. You even held her in your arms, your palms pressed against her skin through a thin layer of clothes. She was trembling in your arms. Don't you want to hear her call you husband?
Zhao Xiuyan listened to the chaotic voices in his mind, and at the same time, his last bit of reason told him, no... no, he couldn't do this, he couldn't do this to her, she didn't like him, he couldn't do this!
These two crazy and chaotic voices were almost fighting in his mind, and the veins on his forehead were throbbing.
In the end, Zhao Xiuyan only felt that the taut string in his head was getting tighter and tighter, and his blood vessels were pounding, as if there was a heat that was about to burst out of his body, but he had nowhere to vent it.
An extreme desire and heat wave quickly flowed through his body like water, spreading rapidly from his limbs to every part of his body.
Just when he felt that he was about to suffocate and explode to death, Yanyan's slightly tentative and gentle voice finally rang in his ears again.
"Brother Zhao, what happened to you? If you have any questions, you can tell me. Maybe I can help you."
When Zhao Xiuyan heard this, the taut string in his mind suddenly paused, making a slight "buzzing" sound.
...Help him? How?
Does she really want to?
Hearing this, Zhao Xiuyan paused for a moment.
His body seemed to be involuntarily moving towards her, his snow-white face showing a bright red, the corners of his eyes revealing a gorgeous red, and his eyes were filled with an indescribable sticky and heavy feeling, like a piece of candy that was constantly being pulled, revealing an alluring and greasy aura.
Then he whispered her name.
"Yan Yan..."
His voice was hoarse, and there was an unbearable torment in his tone, that kind of itching that seemed to have drilled into every limb of his body, from under his flesh into the cracks between his bones, disturbing him and making him restless. The desire and fantasy that could not be touched but kept teasing him to pieces made his eyes red.
"Can you help me... help me?"
He took a step forward subconsciously.
Nan Yan was frightened by his creepy look and aura. A trace of fear flashed in her eyes and her face turned slightly pale. She took a step back unconsciously and stuck close to the door frame.
"How, how can I help you?"
她聲音害怕地問了句。
而趙修言的目光在觸及到她略有些慌亂的眼神時，快要觸碰到她的臉龐的手指，仿佛被燙着了似的，又快速地抽回。
她害怕……她怕他。
不行……不能這樣做。
大腦停滞了一下，然後翻湧出一絲僅存的理智。
趙修言看了眼前的南嫣一眼，腦中思緒又開始翻騰混亂起來。
在她的注視下，他忽然伸手用力抓緊了腰帶，那力道很緊，緊得手背青筋暴起，将腰間不小心抓住的衣衫都抓出了一層褶皺。
那兩只手格外的好看，指節修長白皙，往常一舉一動都透着一股禁欲冷淡的氣息。
此刻手背青筋鼓動，淡青色的血管清晰顯露，尤其是按在腰間的位置上，莫名透着股兒禁忌的意味。
趙修言用力抽出了腰間的腰帶。
那雙修長滾燙的手指一把抓住她的手掌，然後将腰帶快速地塞進了她的手心，接着又将自己的雙手并攏遞了過去。
他用力握緊手掌，身體繃緊，半抿着唇呼吸急促，那雙眸子充斥着濃厚的欲/色，聲音暗啞地說着，“綁住我，快點，嫣嫣，趁着我……還有最後一絲理智的情況下，你快點幫我綁起來，我不想欺負你。”
趙修言幾乎是喘着氣喊出這句話的。
他聲音都在顫抖。
他真的已經快控制不住了。
南嫣好似終于從他反常的狀況中瞧出了一些端倪，但作為一個從未涉及過這些的弱女子，她似乎只在話本中瞧見過這些狀況。
但此刻也顧不得其他的，她趕緊抓住了他遞過來的那根腰帶，然後手腳慌亂地聽從了這人的要求趕緊将他雙手綁了起來。
一邊綁着，還一邊聽到身旁這人嗓音低啞地說着，“緊一點，你系緊一點……”
等到南嫣終于将那人的兩只手腕用腰帶纏好之後，她剛要收手，對方那雙修長的直接便靈活地從縫隙中鑽出，一把抓住了她的手指。
南嫣心想，所以這是白忙活的一場是嗎？綁起來了，這人還不是能一如既往的能動啊，還累得她手指頭發酸。
這動作讓南嫣被吓得一愣，忘記了閃躲，便是這一怔愣的時間，整個人已經被他拽着按倒在了一旁的軟榻之上。
懷中人掙紮未及，似乎還沒有反應過來，趙修言腦袋昏昏沉沉的，腦海中最後一層頻障被徹底突破，于是想也未想，便低頭不管不顧地吻了上去。
吻上的那一刻，趙修言忽然有種心顫的感覺。
這種感覺就像是一個獨行的俠客背着一柄長劍在幹涸燥熱的沙漠中行走，走了很久也渴了很久，滾燙的熱浪跟沙子幾乎将他灼傷，他已經被那股熱氣燒得理智全無。
偏偏這時候，有個烏發雪膚，通體清涼的姑娘出現了，給他施舍了一汪清泉。
于是趙修言什麽都不想去想了，此刻只想拽着她一起在混亂不堪中沉淪。
幾乎是憑着某種本能，他咬上了那那兩瓣薄薄的，柔軟的唇，盡可能地掠奪一切能讓自己緩解舒服的春水。
“唔，趙師兄、你……”
直到身上這人不管不顧地吻過來的時候，南嫣這才反應過來，緊接着便是掙紮起來，她別過臉，好不容易才讓自己有了一絲喘息的機會，“趙師兄，你怎麽了？為什麽突然對我做這種事情？你快放開我，起來……”
南嫣臉龐微紅，眼中瞬間凝聚的一層霧氣，淚意彌漫，眼裏的神色先是難以置信。
不敢相信一直以來溫潤平和的如玉公子會對自己做出這樣的事情，緊接着那雙眼裏又流露出恐懼不安的神色。
聲音輕顫地喊着他的名字，“趙、趙師兄，你清醒一點……”
趙修言是清醒的，他認得身下的人是誰，知道自己一直渴望的是什麽，只是理智已經被燃燒殆盡，往常能夠克制壓抑的感情也在這一刻徹底崩盤了。
他吻着她的脖子，沿着脖子細細密密地吻上去，吻着她的下巴，輕柔又帶着某種不容抗拒的架勢。
感受到她掙紮抗拒的态度，他又毫不猶豫地鎮壓下去，原本綁起來的雙手被他輕松掙開，雙手順勢攬住她的腰身，強勢禁锢。
南嫣被他壓制地根本無法動彈，她的那點掙紮的力道在他看來猶如撓癢一樣，毫無半點用處。
他甚至覺得，她越是掙紮，越是哭泣，反倒越能勾起他藏在心底深處的那些隐秘的掌控欲，看她在他底下露出失控淩亂的情緒，要她的喜怒哀樂全都因他而起。
“嫣嫣……”
在他又吻過來的時候，南嫣故意狠狠咬了他嘴唇一口，一絲微末的痛意讓趙修言蹙了蹙眉，理智恢複片刻，他稍微退開了一寸的距離，在她耳邊輕輕喊了聲她的名字。
“嫣嫣……”
南嫣的掙紮頓時變得更厲害起來了。
“你別碰我……”
她好不容易掙開了他的禁锢，雙手用力抵着、捶打着他的胸口，時不時打到他胸前那處劍傷，聲音哭泣地朝他喊着，
“混賬，你放開我。”
“我已經成親了，我有夫君的，你不能這樣對我，你放開我，我夫君不會放過你的，趙師兄，求你……求你放開我。”
趙修言微擡起頭，額頭的汗水随着動作慢慢滑落到睫毛上，差點落進眼睛裏，他眼睫輕顫了下，呼吸輕輕噴灑在她肌膚上，引起肌膚的一陣顫栗。
他伸手輕輕碰了碰她的唇，那雙充斥着情愫的黑眸裏流露出異樣的光，輕輕磨蹭着她的肌膚，然後說出的一個事實。
“嫣嫣，他不會來的，不會來找你，更不會救你，你夫君早就不要你了是不是？”
南嫣眼睛瞬間睜大，眼眶不受控制地泛紅，原本掙紮的力道也因這句話而停了下來。
她似乎是想到了那天發生的事情，眼淚順着眼角一顆顆滑落，沒入鬓角後濡濕了一縷發絲，她眸光絕望的望着眼前的人，聲音哽咽，“你……怎麽會知道？”
趙修言擡起手指輕柔拭去她眼角滑落的淚水，呼吸又變得急促起來，“我不是傻子，你一路上都沒有提過一句要我們送你回去的話，那天又是一個人失魂落魄的在外頭亂跑，倘若你夫君真的在意你，又怎麽會棄你于不顧。”
他說着距離又挨得更近了一些，薄唇微啓着，從殷紅的唇間輕吐出濕熱的氣息，隐隐拂動了她臉頰上散落的烏發。
底下這人對此刻的他來說好似一汪冰涼的泉水，只有挨着她，觸碰他，才能讓他心底的燥意減少一點。
他輕吻着她的眼皮，忽然說了一聲，“對不起，我知道，是我們連累了你。”
他伸手，修長的指節握住那只柔軟無力的手掌，與她緊緊相扣。
烏黑的發絲也從肩膀滑落，跟她的糾纏在一起，隐約透露出某種癡纏不休的意味。
“你夫君不肯在意你，我很在意你，嫣嫣……你願不願意給我一個機會？”
他眼睫輕顫着，努力維持着自己腦海中的一絲清明，抿着薄唇，唇色紅而豔，被她咬破皮出了血，像一尊染了瑕疵的玉人。
這人克制自己的時候最為撩人。
南嫣別過臉流着淚，似乎還沉浸在自己傷心的情緒中，根本不想說話。
趙修言低頭，不想就這麽稀裏糊塗地放縱自己，他想要得到她的人，更想得到她的眷戀跟依賴，“嫣嫣，給我一個機會好不好？我并不是……一時沖動，只是不知何時對你生出的心思，或許是第一次見面，就對你生出了一些雜念，但我一直在克制，倘若不是今天，我或許永遠不會這樣對你……”
底下那人還是不肯搭理他。
趙修言的眼裏慢慢有些失望，他握着南嫣的手指更緊，希望她能給他一絲回應。
“我知道這對你來說有些難以接受。”
趙修言有些不甘，動了動手，輕輕掰過她的下巴，那雙泛着淚光的眼睛剛好就映入他的眼裏。
她抿着唇，眼裏有難過，有害怕，但是卻沒有怨恨，更多的是對他戳穿了那個真相後的傷心。
趙修言仔細的望着南嫣的眼神。
“嫣嫣，你讨厭我嗎？”
他的聲音沙啞的，帶着濃厚的欲/望。
聽到這話，南嫣微怔了下，這才稍微有了點反應，目光落在他的臉上，她眼裏閃過猶豫不安，但最後還是輕緩搖了搖頭。
趙修言意識到這一點，嫣嫣不讨厭她，她或許只是還沒有放下她夫君，但她并不厭惡他，意識到這些，他心髒忽然跳動的有些快速，呼吸也漸漸急促起來。
然後他低頭，額頭輕輕抵住南嫣的額頭，又低聲喚了句她的名字，“嫣嫣，不讨厭的話，可不可以試着慢慢接受我？別把自己封閉起來，你夫君不值得你為他哭泣。”
他口中呼出的熱氣全都噴灑在南嫣的唇上，幾乎已經忍耐到了極致，整個人都在輕顫着，“我帶你回青州好不好？”
“青州的霧霞山很美，山頂種了密密麻麻的海棠花，花開的時候，幾乎練成了一片，像紅色的雲霞，在白色的迷霧中若隐若現，我陪你一起去看好不好？”
“給我……好不好？”
南嫣的睫毛微微顫動，她沒有掙紮，或許是因為沒有力氣了，又或許是因為知道掙紮也無用，而他說的話則是，然後緩慢閉上了眼睛。
趙修言一怔，反應過來那是什麽意思之後，于是再也忍不住，低頭吻了上去。
到後來……
南嫣忍不住地想，這種表情冷清實則瘋狗的人還是少招惹比較好，橫沖直撞的，她簡直都想崩了人設，一腳給他踹下床去。
她是什麽銅皮鐵骨嗎？就這副柔弱的小身子板能經得起他這麽不要臉的折騰嗎？
老房子的這把火差點把她給燒沒了。
到最後南嫣都麻木了，嗓子都啞了，一句話都說不出來了。
……
這之後，趙修言也覺得難堪，尤其是第二天醒來的時候，望着床上那一抹殷紅的印記，他幾乎不敢擡頭去看嫣嫣的眼睛。
他原本就因此事愧疚至極，如今更是羞憤欲死，他沒想到她從未經歷過人事，她根本什麽都不懂，這些夫妻之事甚至不如他懂得多，他昨晚……昨晚……
他甚至不敢回想，覺得自己像是某種發/青的禽獸，可能……嫣嫣會覺得他不知羞恥，他也确實很無恥。
趙修言将地上褶皺得不成樣子的衣袍撿起來，還有散落在地上的衣裙，小心撿起來，一件一件撫平，整理幹淨，然後才轉頭看向床上背對着他的女子。
他小心翼翼握住她的手腕，那樣纖細的腕骨上，全是他昨晚肆意留下的印子，青青紫紫的，惹人心疼。
“對不起……”
他不知從哪裏摸出來一盒藥膏，小心翼翼塗在腕骨紅紫的地方，涼絲絲的觸感讓底下那人手指下意識蜷縮了下。
趙修言直接将她連人帶被子一起抱進懷裏，然後吻了吻她的額頭，“對不起，別怕我好不好？更別……厭惡我，我昨晚是有些過分，以後不會了，往後我會好好照顧你，別怕。”
南嫣雖然很想一腳将人踹開，但仔細想想，她這會兒作為一個剛被欺負得很慘的弱女子，雖然也有爽到，但她是不會承認的。
于是咬着嘴唇，思緒混亂地将手指從他掌心中抽了出來，她此刻心情有些複雜，眼圈也有些泛紅，整個人一副極度不安的樣子，根本不知道該如何去回應他。
趙修言瞧見她這樣的面色，他也知道她此刻心情肯定很混亂，她心中明顯還惦記着她的夫君，在這種情況下，又被他毀了清白，她肯定是難以接受的。
他不會逼迫她的，他可以等，等她慢慢忘卻心中那個男人，那個不值得她喜歡的丈夫，那樣的人，雖然不知道那天到底發生了什麽事情，但從她那天的狀态來看，便知道，禦流雲肯定對她說了一些極傷人的話。
從今往後，他會陪着她，回青州之後，他會跟林家退婚，不論他們要什麽賠償，他都可以給，但這輩子，他只認定她一人了。
趙修言将被子掀開，臉龐頓時更紅了，他手指不太靈活的撿起一旁的裙子往她身上套着，底下的人一開始抗拒，但渾身無力掙紮的模樣最後也只能閉眼忍受了。
畢竟更過分的事情都做過了，穿個衣服又能算的了什麽。
于是南嫣就閉着眼睛心安理得地享受這人的服侍了。
等到趙修言替她把衣服整理好之後，又脫下的身上的外袍，嚴嚴實實地蓋在了她身上，最後一把将人抱起，随後提氣，一腳踹開了那扇木門，吓得南嫣腦袋下意識地埋進了他胸口。
趙修言從門後走出來，一擡頭便看到了站在院子裏，面色陰沉，眸色晦暗，眉眼間隐隐浮現一絲陰冷戾氣的師弟。
師弟的腳邊躺着一具屍首，那具屍首面色發青發白，肢體僵硬，看來已經死去多時了，應該是昨晚就已經死了。
趙修言注意到師弟眼中的那一絲殺意，還有他看向他懷中人時那種嫉恨憤怒的目光，他用力捏着手中的劍柄，手背青筋凸起，眼中隐隐浮現了一絲血絲。
趙修言掃了師弟一眼，他不覺得自己需要對師弟解釋什麽，雙手更加抱緊懷中的女子，直接跨過那具屍體，然後帶着人去附近的客棧。
他需要找個丫鬟幫嫣嫣清洗一下。
慕容拓最終還是沒有動手，不知道是因為怕吓到他懷裏的嫣嫣，還是惦記着兩人之間那點已然消失殆盡的同門之情。
趙修言此刻顧不得這些，眼下已經顧不上其他的，所有的心神都在懷中這人身上，他帶着嫣嫣去了附近的客棧，又讓店小二找了個手腳麻利的丫鬟，然後讓人照顧好房裏的女子。
他自己則是去後院廚房熬藥去了。
等到趙修言從小二那裏拿過草藥，剛走到後院廚房時，就被神色冰冷師弟堵住了，慕容拓烏黑的眼珠直勾勾盯着眼前的師兄，“我有話問你，昨晚到底發生了什麽事情？”
趙修言語氣異常冷靜，又恢複到了從前那個溫和平靜的師兄了，他轉頭，看向面前的師弟，然後說，“你不是都聽到了嗎？昨晚我中了采花賊的毒，那個采花賊半路将我跟嫣嫣鎖在了一個屋子裏……”
後面的話他沒有說完，但發生的事情已經衆所周知。
于是師弟的面色瞬間變得陰冷，他咬着牙，死死壓住胸口的怒火，一把揪住師兄的衣襟，“所以你就欺負她了，你強迫她！你明知道她什麽武功都不會，你還欺負她，你知道她有夫君的，你還對她做這種事情！”
慕容拓幾乎壓抑不住眼底的殺意。
如果眼前這人不是他一直以來尊重的師兄，如果不是知道他的性子跟為人，他早就控制不住自己殺了他了。
他怎麽可以？他怎麽敢的？
他昨夜半路上遇到那個受傷的采花賊，一路追蹤逼問之下才知道他将人擄到了這間小院，可等他來時，聽到的卻是……
那一瞬間，慕容拓才是真正的如墜冰窖，渾身發冷發抖，幾乎不敢相信自己聽到的。
然後他咬着牙，那一刻，根本控制不住心底的殺意，所以憤怒之下直接殺了那個帶路的采花賊。
他在外頭站了一夜，站得身體都僵硬了，稍微動一下，便覺得好像有無數只螞蟻在他的心口啃噬撕咬着一般，讓他痛苦萬分。
可他甚至不知道自己為什麽這麽痛苦？
後來他才恍惚明白，原來那是嫉妒的感覺，嫉妒到甚至想沖進去殺了那個欺負她的人，即便那個人是他一直敬重的師兄。
慕容拓驟然收緊了手，眼神冰冷地盯着他。
師兄平靜地回望過去，那雙黑眸淡漠地瞧着他，“你真的察覺不出來嗎？她是被她夫君趕出來的，否則那一日她不會那樣失魂落魄的在山下亂逛，我……我是欺負了她，但并非一時沖動，我會好好守護她。”
聽到這話，師弟漆黑的眼珠子轉動了下，嘴角突然掀起一抹冷凝的弧度，露出諷刺的笑容，“直到此刻，我才知道師兄的那些心思，從什麽時候開始的呢？難不成從一開始的時候，師兄就對她圖謀不軌嗎？”
趙修言斂着眸，相比較于情緒激動的師弟，他的情緒一直很平穩，眸光掃向他的時候也平靜無波，“或許，一開始的時候是有些雜念，但沒那麽深，之後的見面中逐漸生出了一些不該有的心思。”
原本他一直在克制，他打算将那種陌生又古怪的情緒一直藏在心底深處，不會讓任何人知道，直到昨晚徹底失敗，他也不知道自己會中那樣的毒，更不知道會發生那樣的事情，讓他原有的理智全部崩盤。
聽到這話，師弟眸色更沉了，臉上的嘲諷收斂，瞬間面無表情地盯着眼前的師兄，“你是不是忘了，自己早就是有未婚妻的人了？你想跟嫣嫣在一起，那翩翩姐怎麽辦？還是說，你想嫣嫣就這麽沒名沒分的跟着你，讓她給你當妾室？”
趙修言皺了皺眉，伸手拂開師弟的手掌，“不會，我會跟翩翩退婚。還有，這話你不要在嫣嫣面前亂說，我不希望她聽到這種亂七八糟的閑話，更不希望她難過。”
說完這些，趙修言轉身就走，他還要去給嫣嫣熬些藥膏，用來清除印記。
慕容拓看着師兄離開的背影，氣得攥緊拳頭，轉身就走，休想！
休想他會放手，他不會放手的。
他從來沒有這麽嫉恨過，憑什麽所有的事情都要順着他的心意來，憑什麽，憑什麽！為什麽從小到大，什麽都要跟他搶呢？為什麽從前的翩翩姐是這樣，為什麽現在他好不容易喜歡上的女子也是這樣？
He could give up everything, but not Yanyan. He finally understood his feelings and finally fell in love with a woman. How could he...how could he just give her up to someone else? Even if he was his senior brother, he couldn't do that.
…
Meanwhile, in the Xuancang Sect, Yu Liuyun felt uneasy for some unknown reason the whole night. When he was practicing Qigong to heal his injuries, he accidentally got a stitch in the side and vomited a mouthful of blood.
He suddenly felt a pain in his chest as if being pricked by a needle, and it hurt so much that cold sweat broke out on his forehead.
He looked up at the small courtyard. For some reason, he suddenly found himself in the courtyard where he and Yanyan lived together when they first got married.
In fact, it wasn't just tonight. He had been wandering around the gate of the courtyard for the past two days, but didn't dare to come in. He didn't know what was wrong with him. He clearly... he clearly hated betrayal the most in his heart, but at this moment he inexplicably felt endless regret in his heart.
The yard is still the same yard as before, but the person who used to live in the yard is gone.
In the past, whenever he came in, he could see a gentle and beautiful figure sitting at the desk reading a book by the window. Sometimes, she would lean on the soft couch to take a nap. When she fell asleep, her face was calm and peaceful. She would not get angry even if she was woken up by the noise of him coming in. She would open her soft eyes and call her husband in a hoarse voice, which was full of dependence and attachment...
Every time he thought of this, he would feel an inexplicable emotion churning in his chest, making him restless.
After they got married, she lived in the inner room and he lived on the couch in the outer room. He had good hearing and could often hear her tossing and turning at night. At first, he felt disgusted because she made too much noise. Later, he found an excuse to move out. She looked so depressed at the time, but she never said a word of unhappiness to him.
But that day...
He said such excessive words to her that day, and Yu Liuyun clenched his fingers unconsciously. Not only was it excessive, it almost trampled all her dignity on the ground. He had never seen her so desperate and crying so sadly. Later, she cried and begged him not to send her away.
Thinking of those, Yu Liuyun suddenly felt as if he couldn't breathe. An unprecedented panic kept surging out from the depths of his heart. It seemed as if his heart was stabbed suddenly by something. The dense pain quickly and violently spread from his chest to the whole body, making Yu Liuyun feel unbearable pain.
In the end, he didn't even know if it was the pain spreading from his injuries or from what he was thinking about.
He had never fulfilled his responsibilities as a husband from the beginning. He had been letting her down from the beginning. He even drove his wife away. He accidentally lost such a weak woman who knew no martial arts...
What should he do?
Yanyan...where on earth have you been?