Chapter 66 Please.
It was late autumn, and the autumn wind at night carried a biting chill. A few withered leaves were swept up by the breeze and swirled in the empty street, making a rustling sound like whispers.
At the end of the long street, a small courtyard with black tiles and white walls stands alone, no different from the rows of houses on both sides. Only the two unlit lanterns in front of the door sway gently in the wind.
The courtyard was surrounded by soldiers wielding long halberds and clad in fine armor, their imposing presence deterring onlookers from staring too long.
Pei Yu walked out of the small courtyard, looking lost and unsteady. Chi Yan, who had been waiting anxiously, stepped forward to support him. "Young General, are you alright?"
When Chi Yan saw Pei Yu come out alone with the courtyard gate behind him tightly closed, he knew that things were not good.
His heart tightened at the sight of Pei Yu's pale complexion. The fabric behind him was damp and carried a strong smell of blood. He quickly helped Pei Yu sit on the steps, took out a pill from his sleeve, and held it to Pei Yu's lips. "Young General, your wound has reopened. Take your medicine quickly."
Pei Yu's dark eyes darted around, staring at the vermilion pill in Chi Yan's hand. The color seemed to be intertwined with a human figure, and he found it extremely dazzling.
He took the pill, pressed hard with his fingertips, and the pill turned into powder and flowed into his palm.
"Young General!"
Pei Yu's voice was hoarse: "You guys go first, I want to be alone."
“But…” Chi Yan’s words stopped abruptly, because he saw Pei Yu covering his face with his hands, a soft sob escaping his throat.
He slowly stood up, turned around and spoke briefly with the prefect who was confused about the situation, then ordered his deputy to lead the troops away from their encampment, while he himself stayed a short distance away.
He glanced back worriedly. Two bright red lanterns still hung under the courtyard gate. Pei Yu sat alone in the corner. His mood had calmed down, and he stared blankly at the floor, seemingly lost in thought.
Chi Yan felt a pang of sadness and quickly turned her head away, unable to look any longer.
Pei Yu dared not think about what Huiyin and Yan Yunzhang were doing now, for fear that if he did, he would rush in and kill Yan Yunzhang.
After today, Huiyin and Yan Yunzhang will be a real couple, while in Huiyin's eyes, he is just someone she finds utterly repulsive, someone who makes her sick at the mere sight of him.
Pei Yu couldn't accept it, but he didn't know what else he could do. He tried everything, even begged, but Huiyin just didn't want him anymore. She didn't want him anymore.
He threw away the broken box, took out the wolf fang pendant from it. The pendant glowed under the light. He gripped the wolf fang tightly and plunged it deep into his palm. Thick beads of blood dripped down one by one, but he felt nothing.
Pei Yu recalled the first time he met Huiyin. At that time, they were both young. He came from a very good family and was pampered from a young age. Even the Crown Prince and the Prince of Wu were his younger brothers.
In his youth, apart from his father, no one could make him suffer; Huiyin was the second. Pei Yu still remembers that when Huiyin sat upright in the pavilion and had him thrown out, she slightly raised her chin at him, her eyes and brows exuding an air of nobility.
When they met again, Huiyin had completely forgotten him. He was a little angry, but also felt that he had been petty. His gaze kept following her, watching her chat with her close friends, and how she could banter with others without losing a word, leaving them speechless.
At first, Pei Yu thought that he was only paying special attention to Huiyin because this young woman had once embarrassed him. But the moment he saw her at the Lindu post station, he realized that it was the way a man looks at a woman.
After returning to his room, he asked Fang Mu to find out why Huiyin was at the Lindu post station. He learned that something had happened to her family, her engagement with the Crown Prince had failed, and she was about to return to her hometown with her younger brother.
He sat there for half an hour, his heart growing increasingly restless. He finally managed to suppress the rising thoughts in his mind, but then he heard that Huiyin wanted to see him.
At that moment, he couldn't quite articulate his feelings, nor could he explain why he had changed his mind and wanted to see her. He simply had a strong desire to know why Huiyin had come to see him in the middle of the night.
At that time, he had a vague idea in his mind what Huiyin wanted to do when she saw him.
Inside the post station, when he heard Huiyin say that she loved him, he was happy, but he quickly came to his senses because he knew that Huiyin was lying to him.
She didn't know him at all, and the two of them had only met a few times before. Every time she saw him, Huiyin would avoid him, so how could there be any talk of her being in love with him?
He brought her back to Chang'an, saying he wanted to take her as a concubine, but in reality, he never sent the document for taking her as a concubine to the government office for registration.
Legally speaking, his relationship with Huiyin was not valid, which is why she was able to leave the Pei family so quickly later, because there was never a written contract between them.
At first, Pei Yu only took pity on her and, with his family pressuring him to relent, he used Huiyin's suggestion as an excuse to back down. Initially, he didn't have many thoughts about it, but as they spent more time together, he uncontrollably became infatuated with Huiyin.
She was so beautiful that it was impossible to resist her.
He also successfully won Huiyin's heart and made her fall in love with him, but in the end, he messed it all up.
Huiyin was right. He had never treated her as an equal. He knew that her mother and cousin disliked her and would harm her, but he didn't give them any instructions or explanations. If he had just said something, she could have been spared from such bullying.
But he said nothing, even tacitly condoned it, condoning her being bullied and blatantly favoring He Jiaying, simply because he knew that Huiyin needed his help and had no one else to rely on but him.
Pei Yu suddenly laughed, a laugh tinged with sorrow. He stared at the red lanterns overhead, feeling his eyes sting and dry. He remembered when Huiyin first entered the Pei household, how He Jiaying schemed against her, and how she jumped into the lake to save He Jiaying. It was springtime, the lake water was cold, and he had even given He Jiaying a piece of warm jade to nourish her body.
Pei Yu wasn't home at the time, but he learned how critical the situation was from the maid's account. He knew perfectly well how much his mother loved He Jiaying, and that she had risked her life to scheme against her. She had even jumped into the lake to save He Jiaying despite her fear, and afterwards, instead of being thanked, she was subjected to interrogation.
He later asked the attending physician why Huiyin's menstrual period was so painful. The physician told him that the contraceptive was part of the reason, but more importantly, Huiyin had not taken good care of herself after jumping into the lake, and her body had a cold condition. The combination of these factors caused her menstrual period to be so severe.
Furthermore, He Jiaying hired a sorcerer to frame her. If Huiyin hadn't been quick-witted, she would probably have lost her life long ago. However, his punishment for He Jiaying afterwards was merely a light blow.
Every single detail must be genuine; she suffered a great deal of injustice.
Pei Yu tilted his head back, his jaw clenched. He had never been kind to her, and had never even considered marrying her. How could Huiyin, so intelligent, not guess what kind of feelings she had for him when she stayed by his side?
All the memories of the past flashed before his eyes. Pei Yu gritted his teeth, stood up, and knocked on the door. He couldn't lose Huiyin; he couldn't live without her. From the very first glance, he had known that Huiyin was the only one he wanted in this life.
There was no movement behind the door. Ignoring his injured body, Pei Yu forced himself to climb the gray wall. He lay prone on the wall, clearly feeling the pain of the wound on his back reopening, but that pain was nothing compared to the pain in his heart.
Compared to the suffering and grievances endured by Huiyin, hers was insignificant.
He forced his way over the gray wall, stumbling and falling all the way to the front yard and into Huiyin's room. Blood dripped down his back and onto the yellow mud ground.
Pei Yu clutched his chest, stopped at the doorway, and looked at the dark room with a heart full of anguish. He stepped forward and knocked on the door, calling out, "Huiyin! Huiyin!"
"Come out and see me, I beg you, please don't be so cruel to me."
The two people already lying in bed were preoccupied with their own thoughts and hadn't fallen asleep, so they heard the noise immediately. Yan Yunzhang listened to the commotion outside, turned over, and was speechless. "Will this guy ever stop?" he thought.
He turned to look at Huiyin, who lay motionless on the bed, and struggled to sit up. His chest wound had been bandaged, but he could still feel a sharp pain in his chest with each breath. Yan Yunzhang carefully got up, preparing to leave so Pei Yu could depart.
"Cousin, don't go."
Yan Yunzhang paused as he opened the door, then turned to look at the bed. Layers of curtains were drawn back, obscuring Huiyin's figure. He could only hear her weary voice as she whispered, "Don't worry about him, he'll be gone soon."
Yan Yunzhang sighed softly, feeling that today had truly been a day of great ups and downs. He returned to his makeshift bed on the floor, feeling somewhat sad. He didn't know the details of what happened between Huiyin and Pei Yu, but he could tell from their attitudes that their relationship had been very deep.
Fortunately, Huiyin firmly rejected Pei Yu, which gradually eased Yan Yunzhang's unease. He was not worried that Huiyin still liked Pei Yu. As long as she was willing to marry him, he believed that given time, he would be able to make her let go of Pei Yu and fall in love with him instead.
Pei Yu knocked on the door for a long time, but there was no response. He knew that Huiyin was awake, but she just didn't want to come out to see him.
He stopped what he was doing, stood outside the door with his head bowed, and murmured softly, "You won't even see me once?"
Hearing the commotion, Yan Niang rushed over and saw this scene. She quickly went forward to persuade him. As soon as she got to Pei Yu, she saw a pool of blood where he was standing, and drops of blood were dripping from the hem of his dark clothes.
Yan Niang's heart skipped a beat, and she quickly stepped forward to ask, "General Pei, you're bleeding."
Pei Yu stood outside the door as if he hadn't heard anything, silently staring into the room.
Yan Niang reached out to pull him, but couldn't budge him. She smelled the strong smell of blood on Pei Yu and his clothes, which were completely soaked in blood, and guessed that the wound on his back had reopened.
Yan Niang said worriedly, "General Pei, you should go and treat your wounds first. You've lost too much blood."
Huiyin, who had been lying on the bed with her eyes open, heard Yanniang's words and subconsciously got up, then stopped and slowly lay back down, staring blankly at the ceiling.
Yan Yunzhang's body stiffened at the sound of movement inside the tent, and he only felt relieved after a while when Huiyin did not get up.
Pei Yu finally turned to Yan Niang, but not to tend to her wounds. He asked dejectedly, "Yan Niang, does Huiyin really not want me anymore?"
Seeing Pei Yu's miserable state, Yan Niang couldn't help but feel some pity. She advised, "General Pei, you and Huiyin are not a good match. I beg you, please let it go."
Pei Yu's eyes were bloodshot. He raised his eyes heavily and repeated Yan Niang's words, "Not a good match? You want me to give up?"
"Yan Niang, you make it sound so easy. Huiyin can let go so easily, but I can't."
"If letting go were so easy, there wouldn't be so many fools in the world."
"Yan Niang, please help me. Please let Huiyin come out and see me, okay?"
Yan Niang felt a lump in her throat, turned her head away to wipe her tears, and refused to speak.
The two people inside heard the conversation outside clearly. Yan Yunzhang felt a mix of emotions. He was originally very dissatisfied with Pei Yu's stubbornness and demanding nature, but now he couldn't help but understand him a little. If he were in Pei Yu's position, he naturally wouldn't give up so easily either.
Huiyin silently touched her heart. Had she really let go?
Before she could think it through, Pei Yu spoke again, his voice so hoarse that Huiyin almost couldn't recognize it. He wasn't talking to Yan Niang; he was talking to her.
He said, "Huiyin, on the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival banquet, Su Jinghao stopped me and said, 'You only stayed by my side to use me, and you have no sincerity towards me.' I don't believe it. How could you not have sincerity towards me? It's none of her business to interfere in what's between you and me."
She also said that you like Wang Huan and want to marry him.
Pei Yu was struggling to hold on. The wound on his back was hurting more and more. He was feeling dizzy and could not stand up. Even his speech became intermittent.
Unable to hold on any longer, he grabbed the door and slowly knelt on the ground, bowing his head and panting heavily.
Yan Niang was terrified by his appearance. She glanced at Pei Yu helplessly, then got up to find Chi Yan.
If something really happens to Pei Yu here, it might implicate Huiyin as well.
After Yan Niang left, there was a brief moment of silence in the courtyard. Pei Yu continued in a daze, "But when I went back to look for you, you were already gone. In the end, I found you in Tianlu Book Pavilion. At that time, I wasn't angry. Instead, I felt heartache and self-blame. Why didn't I notice that something was wrong with you sooner? Why did I tell you those things about protecting the Su family? That's why you don't trust me so much and won't tell me anything."
"After I got back, when I heard you say that I had only ever used you and never had any genuine feelings for you," he choked up uncontrollably, his vision blurring, his voice a mixture of pleading and questioning: "Huiyin, do you really... have no genuine feelings for me at all?"
"Why can you just abandon me like that, say you don't love me anymore? Have you really been lying to me all along?"
He didn't seem to necessarily need an answer, and said haltingly, "I was furious that day, and I know I did and said a lot wrong. After I calmed down, I regretted it. It's never been that you can't live without me, it's that I can't live without you."
"Huiyin, can you hear me? Please answer me."
Pei Yu raised his head, and the tightly closed door slowly opened in front of him. The person he had been longing for opened the door and walked out. Huiyin was wearing a bright red nightgown, followed by Yan Yunzhang, who was also wearing a nightgown.
They stood together, like a pair of perfect lovers. Huiyin looked down at him, speaking in a calm yet extremely hurtful tone, "How long are you going to keep this up?"
Huiyin slowly squatted down to be level with Pei Yu, staring into his tearful eyes, "Do you know how pathetic and miserable you look right now?"
"What do you want to hear me say? Didn't I already say that?"
Pei Yu found it strange. It was only autumn, but he felt as if he were in an extremely cold place. He just felt very cold, a chill that seeped into his bones.
He reached out to grab Huiyin, but she slapped his hand away. His gaze fell on Huiyin's slender neck, where there was a noticeable red mark, ambiguous and alluring.
His gaze was fixed on that spot, and he trembled as he said, "You..." It felt as if something scalding hot was stuck in his throat, something he couldn't swallow or spit out.
Huiyin interrupted him impatiently, "We consummated our marriage, Pei Yu. You don't think my cousin and I were just acting to fool you, do you? How could you be so naive?"
"What do you have that makes me want to turn back? What do you have that makes me want to give you another chance? Have you forgotten how you treated me before? And how your mother treated me?"
"Can a single word of 'I was wrong,' an apology, erase all the grievances and heartbreak I've endured day and night?"
“I’ve already made myself perfectly clear. If you’ve truly changed, then why do you continue to ignore what I say, insist on your own ideas, and keep blocking my door here over and over again!”
"If the person I'm marrying today isn't my cousin, but someone else, have you ever thought about what consequences your actions would have on me?"
Huiyin closed her eyes, her face full of disappointment, "See, you're always like this..."
She took Yan Yunzhang's hand, interlocked her fingers for Pei Yu to see, and said helplessly, "I've said everything I could to you, but you won't listen. You're in a high position and have all the power you need; you can have any woman you want. Please spare my life."
She paused, then smiled bitterly, "You can execute us with a single order. If you find it unbearable that I'm shifting the blame to someone else, or if it makes you feel humiliated, you can kill me now. Just do it."
Pei Yu's eyes were filled with a blinding red. He could no longer hear what Huiyin was saying. He could only see her holding Yan Yunzhang's hand, looking at him tenderly, then showing deep disgust when she saw him. His body slowly tilted to one side and fell heavily to the ground.
Why did this happen? Why did everything change overnight? His stomach clenched, the pain causing him to furrow his brow and let out a few suppressed gasps, like a trapped beast.
In the midst of the dizzying moment, Pei Yu vaguely saw Huiyin's worried expression. He closed his eyes and smiled helplessly. Would Huiyin still worry about him? She probably wished he were dead.
Seeing Pei Yu lying motionless on the ground, Huiyin felt a chill run down her spine. Only then did she notice a large patch of blood where he was kneeling. She took a step forward uncontrollably, her mind blank.
Yan Yunzhang sensed something was wrong when he saw this scene. He quickly stepped forward to help Pei Yu up, only to find his hands covered in blood when he touched Pei Yu's back. Looking at Pei Yu's face, he saw that it was deathly pale and bloodless, clearly indicating that he had fainted due to excessive blood loss.
He gritted his teeth and tried to lift Pei Yu, but his chest ached and his vision blurred, making it impossible for him to carry Pei Yu.
Yan Yunzhang hurriedly put Pei Yu down and was about to call for help when he turned around and saw Huiyin looking dazed. He quickly woke her up, "Huiyin!"
Huiyin suddenly came to her senses. Yan Yunzhang had never seen such an expression on her face before. She was overwhelmed by endless sorrow, and her eyes were full of pain.
Huiyin knelt beside Pei Yu, holding him in her arms, tears streaming down her face, unable to speak.
She knew everything. On the Mid-Autumn Festival, she knew that Pei Yu had spoken recklessly in anger, and she also knew that he regretted it. He had people bring her and Yan Niang back to the mansion, and sent people to protect her all the way to prevent the Su family from killing her, to help her suffer the punishment, and to find witnesses for her.
She knew Pei Yu regretted it, but words spoken and deeds done could not be erased with just an apology.
Actually, she also regretted it. If she hadn't kept it from Pei Yu all this time, if she had told Pei Yu her secret sooner, if she had been able to control her emotions that night, would she and Pei Yu have ended up like this?
Huiyin rested her head on Pei Yu's forehead, her hands trembling as she touched his cheek. She could feel blood seeping from Pei Yu's back, the blood still warm, quickly soaking her nightgown. The bright red and the blood blended together, much like her wedding dress.
It was the wedding dress she had longed for, the dress she wore for Pei Yu.
When Chi Yan arrived, he saw Pei Yu lying unconscious in Hui Yin's arms, covered in blood. His legs went weak and he knelt on the ground, too afraid to go forward.
Yan Yunzhang saw him and rushed over to pull him up, saying quickly, "He's still breathing, save him first."
Chi Yan took a deep breath, rushed to Pei Yu, took out a pill, and stuffed it into Pei Yu's mouth, forcing him to swallow. Chi Yan squatted down and said to Yan Yunzhang, "Put him on my back."
After carrying Pei Yu on his back, Chi Yan rode away without stopping. The courtyard returned to calm. Yan Yunzhang looked at Huiyin, who was sitting on the ground with her hands covered in blood, and felt a pang of pain in his heart. He stepped forward and said softly, "He is of noble status. The Prefect will do his best to treat him. He will be alright."
Huiyin nodded, her eyes vacant: "Cousin, you should go and rest. I'm too tired. I want to be by myself for a while."
Without waiting for Yan Yunzhang's reply, she got up and went inside, closed the door, and slowly sat down on the floor behind it, resting her head on her knees and wrapping her arms around herself. Pei Yu's blood was still on her hands, a reminder of what had just happened.
Huiyin closed her eyes and leaned quietly against the door, finding a rare moment of peace. After a while, she heard Yan Yunzhang and Yan Niang talking in hushed tones. Yan Niang told Yan Yunzhang to go to the guest room to rest first.
After Yan Yunzhang left, Yan Niang knocked on the door and whispered, "There is no insurmountable difficulty in this world. Don't force yourself when things happen."
"I'll say it again: as long as you're happy, you can do whatever you want. Huiyin, if you really can't let go of Pei Yu, don't torture yourself; follow your heart."
Huiyin buried her head in her knees. She didn't want to cry, but she couldn't help it when she heard Yan Niang's caring tone. Yan Niang was the best person in the world to her, her closest relative, and the person who cared about her the most.
She couldn't let Yan Niang worry about her anymore.
Huiyin choked up and said, "I'm fine, I'm doing well." She looked up to wipe away her tears and tried to smile. "Mother Fu, don't worry, I will live well whether Pei Yu is here or not."
“You are absolutely right about one thing: Pei Yu and I are not meant to be together. Since we are not meant to be together, we should cut ties completely. This is better for me, for him, and for everyone.”
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