Chapter 21 Destiny
"Quietly, I allow you to hold my destiny in your hands."
Lin Yujing's dreams have always been chaotic, especially during the seven years she was away from Chen Jingshu.
A chaotic mix of black and white, blood and the dust and soil of the wasteland.
It's been so many years since I last dreamed of the moment when she first fell in love with me.
It was the gentle autumn breeze blowing through the northern campus that lightly lifted her skirt, or the moment when a naughty girl poured a cup of hot water into her skin, leaving her feeling scalded and embarrassed.
The moment the boy appeared out of the crowd like a ray of light breaking through the sky, he resolutely shielded her behind him.
This was the first time someone had shown her favor, telling her, "It doesn't matter if she's a paper tiger or a real tiger. As long as she's willing, she can be a little fox by his side, using his power to bully others, for the rest of her life."
It is a pupa trapped in its cocoon, catching its first glimpse of a warm light source.
She said she was a moth, but the boy treated her like a butterfly, wishing he could give her his whole world.
From then on, her previously monotonous black and white world became colorful because of him.
And so it came: the enchanting, humid rainy nights of summer.
She couldn't remember how many times they had sex during that period.
Sometimes it's late at night, sometimes it's early morning, sometimes it's when she's in a daze, and then the tide begins to surge.
She thought to herself that she could never repay him for what she owed him, so she would use herself to make up for it and heal his wounds.
But after years of living a solitary life, she discovered that she was the one who needed comforting.
Occasionally, when the pain becomes unbearable, the memory of being hugged, kissed, and having our fingers intertwined so closely makes me want to hold on a little longer.
Unrequited love was her remedy.
What happened next?
For the next seven years after he left, my dreams were dark, bloody, and shattered.
She was like a heinous criminal, condemned to eternal damnation in the deepest hell.
Those seven years were like walking through a long, dark corridor, with mud, broken leaves, and rats underfoot.
She walked helplessly for a long time until she finally saw an open room emitting a warm light. But instead of light, she was confronted by an evil spirit that tried to devour her soul.
Then what?
Then memories overlapped, and the boy in his school uniform from back then stepped on a pile of fallen leaves, as if he had come through a time portal.
Those seemingly endless rainy seasons, after experiencing silence, oppression, and their inevitable demise, are greeted by a spring breeze, and she is pulled back into the warm light.
What is Guang's name?
Lin Yujing murmured, "Chen Jingshu."
Her light is singular, named Chen Jingshu, from Penghu, a coastal city in the north.
-
On the way back, Lin Yujing's body temperature began to soar, accompanied by unconsciousness and constant muttering to herself.
Chen Jingshu was worried that she might have other injuries, so he took her directly back to the courtyard house on the top floor of Wanxiang and called the family doctor to give her a full physical examination.
"Dr. Li, how is she?"
Lin Yujing lay on the bed, still curled up tightly, even her furrowed brows seemed to speak of unease.
She would sometimes suddenly open her eyes and glance at Chen Jingshu, but her eyes were empty and unfocused, and she looked like a piece of glass that would shatter at the slightest touch.
Dr. Li is Chen Jingshu's personal physician, mainly responsible for monitoring his heart. "Mr. Chen, rest assured, this young lady was just a little frightened. In addition, she has always been anemic and malnourished, which is why she suddenly had a high fever and fell into a coma."
The accompanying nurse prepared the medicine and gave Lin Yujing an injection.
"Let her get a good night's rest and sleep, she'll be fine tomorrow."
It's a highly effective medicine with rapid results.
Lin Yujing's uneasy brows finally relaxed slowly.
Chen Jingshu breathed a sigh of relief, tucked the blanket around her, and got up. "Does she often do this?"
After asking the question, Dr. Li was taken aback for a moment, "Doesn't Mr. Chen know about your girlfriend's usual health condition?"
For the past seven years, Chen Jingshu has deliberately ignored all news about her.
He only found out that Lin Yujing had been admitted to the Academy of Fine Arts of Tsinghua University three years after their breakup, when Qu Xi mentioned it casually.
After that, the North Fourth Ring Road, where the Huaqing Academy of Fine Arts is located, became a forbidden zone for him. If Chen Jinyi's new company hadn't chosen that location, he probably would never have set foot there.
"I...I really don't know."
Dr. Li didn't ask any further questions, only replying, "It's nothing serious, but her anemia and malnutrition are still quite severe, and she seems to be under a lot of mental stress, which has led to very poor sleep quality."
Chen Jingshu looked at her pale face and his lips trembled slightly. "Then, what's the best way to treat her?"
"It's very simple. Don't overwork yourself, eat some tonics to replenish your qi and blood, get plenty of rest, and you'll be fine after a while."
"Thank you, Dr. Li."
Chen Jingshu and Chu Yan saw Dr. Li out of the guest room. Then Dr. Li suddenly turned back to him and said solemnly, "Recently, you should also pay attention to your sex life and not do it too frequently."
"..." Chen Jingshu coughed silently.
After seeing Dr. Li off, Chen Jingshu sat by Lin Yujing's bedside and watched her.
The person was pale and thin, like a piece of paper, with slightly sunken cheeks.
"After hiding for seven years, you're not going to hide anymore?" With the air conditioning on in the room, Chu Yan closed the door and sat down on a soft chair, asking.
"I hate her." So much so that I dared not inquire about any information about her. But seeing her weak appearance now, even the hand that wanted to touch her trembled. In the end, he only used his fingertips to smooth the strands of hair that fell across her forehead, one by one.
"But watching her fawn over me, so cautiously trying to please me, and her pathetic self-deprecation, I should have felt triumphant and proud, but I just couldn't be happy. I only felt incredibly heartbroken."
"You two..." Chu Yan sighed, "are just like sworn enemies."
“Isn’t it said that selfish people will live well? How come she’s getting worse and worse…” Chen Jingshu’s brow trembled, and a tear fell into Lin Yujing’s palm. “And she’s so stubborn and inflexible, she won’t back down.”
"So you're planning to... just let bygones be bygones?" Chu Yan asked.
"Chu Yan, I don't have any family left." Chen Jingshu held Lin Yujing's hand and stroked her palm. "As long as she's willing to stay by my side, whether she's after money or power, it doesn't matter to me."
He only asked that she be obedient.
Chu Yan scratched his head helplessly, "You're just unable to let go of things from your childhood. Your obsession is too deep. Don't end up hurting yourself."
“It doesn’t matter, none of this matters.” He bent down and placed her hand on his heart, saying, “Jingjing, I allow you to hold my destiny in your palm.”
Sometimes, love and hate go hand in hand, and his lack of talent only proves how much he loves her.
“You rascal, you really are a rascal.” Chu Yan repeated again, “Should we tell her about your surgery in the United States next week?”
Chen Jingshu shook his head. "I'm not in a position to talk to her about this yet. She's still sick and as weak as a sheet of paper."
"She was your ex-girlfriend, after all." Chu Yan curled his lips and said, "I think you're just afraid. You're afraid that if someone cares about you, you'll have to guess whether it's genuine or fake."
"Get lost."
“But let me remind you, you need to think carefully about whether your decision today is based on your deep love for her, or on seeing her hurt, coupled with the possessiveness of a young boy pursuing her.” Chu Yan stood up with his arms crossed. “And most importantly, do you want her to stay with you, or to become the wife of your Yijing Chen family? These are two different things.”
"..."
"That's all for now. You should get some rest too. Your surgery is more important right now, and also, don't let your little stand-in get in the way."
"Just a little brat." Chen Jingshu tucked Lin Yujing's hand under the covers, got up, and said, "Goodnight."
-
The next day, when Lin Yujing woke up, she was greeted by a bedroom with an unfamiliar setting.
She nervously checked her body first, and only breathed a sigh of relief when she found that she was fully clothed and that her last memory was of being with Chen Jingshu.
Warm, gentle light streamed into the room through the window. Lin Yujing got out of bed barefoot and stepped onto the white plush carpet that covered the entire room.
The early winter air felt warm to the touch.
She walked towards the window, drew back the plain-colored curtains, and saw a traditional Chinese courtyard.
The room directly opposite the bedroom is the incense room. At this early morning, wisps of bluish smoke drift slowly, moving with the air, as if one were in a lavender garden.
Lin Yujing remembered that this was Chen Jingshu's courtyard house on the top floor of the Huaren Wanxiang Hotel.
However, unlike the sophisticated and elegant courtyard design outside, the style inside the room is more like the design of his company.
Or perhaps, it's more like him as a person.
They appear noble and unattainable on the outside, but their hearts are empty and pale.
Lin Yujing pushed open the door and stepped out, only then realizing how lonely and isolated the courtyard house, built high in the sky, truly was.
-
Chen Jingshu and Chu Yan were sitting in the restaurant when Chen Jingshu suddenly looked away.
Chu Yan waited for a long time, but before he could reply, he realized that the soul had already drifted away.
Following his gaze, they saw Lin Yujing standing in front of a tree, lost in thought.
In the chilly early winter, the horizon was gray and white, which made her temperament even more aloof and elegant, like a lady who lived independently in a classical painting.
But at the same time, one can't help but sigh that what is more beautiful than a beautiful woman is a sickly beauty.
Even the greatest anger will be quelled by love.
"Lin Yujing, good morning!" Chu Yan opened the restaurant window and said, "Come and have breakfast."
Lin Yujing turned around to hear the sound and saw Chen Jingshu sitting by the window, then walked over.
She opened the restaurant door and found it empty, with only plain white furniture.
In the middle of the long white dining table, a bright red bouquet of flowers stood out conspicuously.
Chu Yan seemed to have caught her gaze as well, and asked, "Great artists, please comment: isn't this flower arrangement a bit odd?"
Chu Yan and Chen Jingshu were just arguing about this bouquet of flowers. One said it was beautiful and that he had specially asked the hotel florist to deliver it early in the morning, while the other said that the colors were completely out of place, jarring and jarring.
Lin Yujing looked at Chen Jingshu and found him smiling gently at her. A flood of tender whispers flashed through her mind, memories of last night.
She was sleeping soundly and couldn't tell whether it was real or a dream.
But she still subconsciously favored Chen Jingshu, saying, "This flower is called Wild Crow's Tooth, which usually grows in the mountains. It looks even more beautiful when paired with a lush and elegant pastoral style or a classic and elegant Chinese style."
Just as Chu Yan was about to speak with a smug look, Lin Yujing continued, "But white as a background is also very nice. It has a kind of artistic conception of white snow and red plum blossoms."
Lin Yujing paused deliberately because she had her own selfish motives.
As far as I can remember, the first time Chen Jingshu softened his stance after we reunited was by giving her a snow-white plum-flavored pastry.
She was also subtly yielding to Chen Jingshu and thanking him for his timely rescue yesterday.
Feeling awkward, Chu Yan said, "I knew you'd unconditionally protect him. Here, those bowls are your breakfast."
Chen Jingshu remained silent, but since her breakfast was placed next to him, Lin Yujing went over and sat down beside him.
"Ginseng, jujube and astragalus porridge, donkey-hide gelatin cake, and chicken soup with angelica and rehmannia." Chu Yan looked at the white porridge in front of him and said sourly, "The doctor came yesterday and said you were anemic, so Brother Jing ordered Tongren Private Kitchen medicinal meal for you early this morning."
Angelica sinensis, ginseng, astragalus membranaceus, red dates, donkey-hide gelatin, and rehmannia glutinosa are all traditional Chinese medicines that nourish qi and blood.
Lin Yujing's heart was warm at this moment, all because of Chen Jingshu.
"Mr. Chen, thank you." She said softly, her eyes slightly red.
Chen Jingshu put down his bowl and finally spoke, but first he sighed and stared straight into her eyes, "Still calling me President Chen so formally. Jingjing, all that kindness I've shown you has been for nothing."
These words inexplicably reminded her of the past.
Seven years ago, she called everything.
In intimate, ambiguous moments, when they were inseparable in bed, she was even forced to call him "brother" and "husband."
He used the same excuse back then, saying that she had been good to him for nothing, yet she still called him "A-Shu" so formally, and kept saying that she was heartless.
Moreover, Lin Yujing noticed that the way he was looking at her was also strange.
It's a bit ambiguous, intimate, and carries a sensual possessiveness.
Lin Yujing pursed her lips, glanced at Chu Yan, and found that he was craving her medicinal food, unaware of some unknown aspects of Chen Jingshu.
"Then... I'll call you Brother Jing too?" After all, time had passed, and she still didn't dare to make wild guesses or impose her own fantasies.
Seeing that Chen Jingshu just shrugged, she thought he wasn't satisfied, so she quickly added, "Or, how about calling me A-Shu?"
A note from the author:
Young Master Chen: I'm not singing today. My wife is injured, and I need to stay by her bedside first.
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