Chapter 20 Admitting Defeat
"Jingjing, I admit defeat to you, okay?"
Lin Yujing lowered her head, trying to focus her gaze on the chopsticks, but found that no matter what, Chen Jingshu's figure was always in her peripheral vision.
Although blurry, you can still see the somber and dejected expression on his face.
The tone was understated, but upon closer examination, it was easy to discern the underlying sadness beneath.
"Judging from Mr. Chen's tone, it seems like your breakup with Lin wasn't very amicable," someone asked curiously. "Is there some inside story we don't know?"
In the early winter, the air conditioning in the restaurant's private room was set to a high temperature, causing people's cheeks to become chapped.
Lin Yujing's hair was half-disheveled, barely covering the blood dripping from her ears.
“Jingjing, can you talk about it? Two-thirds of the people here today are your family. We will support you and judge the matter to see who is at fault.”
Lin Yujing's smile suddenly stiffened. She first touched the tip of her nose, pondering how to respond.
She figured Chen Jingshu must be ready to watch the show, to hear her retell that fairytale made up of deception.
And she was curious how her "family" would help her condemn that unpleasant first love story after hearing about it.
“Back then…” Lin Yujing opened her mouth, realizing for the first time how weak her language skills were.
They can neither embellish themselves nor distort the facts.
“That was many years ago, when we were still young.” She didn’t expect Chen Jingshu to suddenly speak up and end the conversation directly. “Our understanding of relationships was ignorant and naive, and it’s not appropriate to judge them from an adult perspective.”
Qi Woxue took Lin Yujing's hand under the table and echoed, "President Chen is right. Besides, there is no absolute right or wrong in feelings. It is up to the person involved to know for themselves whether they are feeling good or bad."
"Actually, I'm more curious whether Mr. Chen and Jingjing's past relationship will affect their current work." Xu Jibai smiled sheepishly, "It's just my curiosity as the founder of the alliance."
Chen Jingshu said calmly, "As a partner, I am now more concerned about Lin's abilities."
Lin Yujing carefully raised her eyes and met Chen Jingshu's gaze.
His gaze was calm, carrying a hint of desolate chill from the snow.
It's as if he's saying that the boat has already passed, and he's not deliberately trying to protect it, but rather he doesn't want to reopen his wounds.
Between them, besides love and hate, there are also mother, life and death, abandonment and deception.
Upon closer examination, destiny is entangled too deeply, like the intricate roots of a large tree.
She was injured, so naturally he couldn't act alone.
And so, amidst laughter and banter, the past stories of their relationship were turned over a new page.
-
After lunch, it was almost time for work or school, and everyone stood outside the restaurant preparing to leave.
Lin Yujing and Qi Woxue stood together, with Zhang Jiale closely beside her, carrying her packed paintings in his arms and her bag on his shoulder.
"Are you sure you don't need me and Xu Jibai to see you off?" After the meeting, Qi Woxue and Xu Jibai were going back to the alliance to review and elaborate on the key issues raised today.
“The client lives in the southern suburbs, which is too far.” Lin Yujing had arranged to deliver the painting to the client in the afternoon. “Zhang Jiale will accompany me. We will take the subway and then transfer to a bus. We’ll take the afternoon out to relax.”
Qi Woxue nodded. "Okay. I feel more at ease knowing Lele is with you."
-
"Brother Jing, you know what, the more I look at that kid, the more he reminds me of you in high school," Chu Yan said casually, leaning against the car window.
Chen Jingshu didn't respond, but coldly glanced back at Lin Yujing, only to find that Lin Yujing and Zhang Jiale were both wearing the same style of white wool coat.
The two people, with their well-proportioned and tall figures, standing side by side as a handsome man and a beautiful woman, are pleasing to the eye for passersby.
“With the added advantage of a first love and a strong-willed woman being persistent, Xiao Zhang might actually be able to win Jingjing over.” Chu Yan turned around and met Chen Jingshu’s gloomy expression, feeling a chill from his cold gaze. Then, sensibly, she immediately changed the subject, “Of course, that’s also because he’s so much like you. People, you know, always fall for their first love.”
“If you’re bored, just go back to the company yourself.” Chen Jingshu frowned and suddenly pushed open the car door.
Chu Yan thought he was angry and embarrassed and was really going to throw her out of the car, so she quickly defended herself, saying, "But you two don't look alike at all now. The mature, steady, and serious President Chen is much more attractive, while I personally prefer your husbandly, uncle-like charm!"
To his surprise, Chen Jingshu completely ignored him, put his hands in his trouser pockets, and called out to someone not far away, "Lin Yujing, where are you going to deliver the painting?"
As if acting on her own subconscious, Lin Yujing turned around the moment Chen Jingshu spoke, "Over there in the southern suburbs, it's called something like Jiuyuan Port."
An old saying goes in Beijing: East merchants are wealthy, West nobles are rich, South poor and North destitute.
The southern suburbs are mostly factories, and the route there from where they are now is quite circuitous.
"I'm going to the factory in the south to check on a batch of goods, so I'll give you a ride on the way." Chen Jingshu's face was full of candor, truly like a considerate boss who appreciated his subordinate after letting go of the past.
Chu Yan was shocked. He leaned over behind him and muttered, "Big brother, when did the factory move from the west to the south? How come I didn't know?"
Lin Yujing was unaware of the truth and was only worried that she would trouble him. "No need, Mr. Chen. Zhang Jiale and I will take the subway and then a bus. It will only take two or three hours to get there."
Chen Jingshu nodded, not in a hurry to reply, "That's fine too. But last time I heard from a former colleague that they waited for the bus for an hour, and then couldn't wait any longer and took a taxi, which cost them two or three hundred yuan."
Upon hearing this, Lin Yujing froze on the spot, her mind blank for a moment, "So...difficult to get through..."
Her school is on the North Fourth Ring Road, and the furthest she goes is the East Second Ring Road. She's not familiar with the roads to the south.
Just then, her phone rang; it was a client with whom she had an appointment.
As soon as the call connected, a woman's voice, accompanied by a cloyingly sweet static tone, came through: "Hello, could you arrive earlier this afternoon? I need to go to the hospital later for orthopedic rehabilitation treatment."
Lin Yujing looked at Chen Jingshu, who was still standing in the same spot, and replied, "Okay, of course no problem, I'm almost there..."
Chen Jingshu held up his hand and gave her a "1".
"I'll be there in about an hour."
"Okay, see you in a bit."
After hanging up the phone, Lin Yujing awkwardly pursed her lips and moved toward Chen Jingshu, "It seems I still have to trouble President Chen."
"It's nothing," Chen Jingshu said calmly, holding onto the car door. "It's just that there's only one seat left in the car, so it's not convenient for Xiao Zhang to come along."
"How can that be..." Zhang Jiale looked at Lin Yujing with a pitiful expression, like a abandoned puppy. "Senior, how will you come back if I don't stay with you!"
To his surprise, Chen Jingshu strode towards him. The tall, handsome, and mature man exuded a powerful presence, taking the painting and schoolbag directly from his arms. "With me here, I'll make sure to take her there and bring her back."
Chu Yan: "Kid, a private car is definitely more comfortable than a bus. You should go back to school and study hard."
Lin Yujing turned around, and Zhang Jiale looked even more aggrieved, "Senior..."
"Jiale, I know you mean well, but the client is pressing us hard." Lin Yujing could only comfort him, "Why don't you go back to school with Senior Brother Xu and the others first, okay?"
The puppy felt wronged and unwilling to accept it.
However, for the sake of the overall situation, they listened to Lin Yujing and left with Qi Woxue.
Chen Jingshu then turned around and said to her, "Get in the car."
-
Inside the carriage, a warm breeze carried the scent of ebony and sandalwood, and Lin Yujing felt that her clothes and hair were filled with Chen Jingshu's fragrance.
After Ren Mo started the car and drove off, Chu Yan couldn't wait to turn around and say, "Let me see the draft you drew."
Lin Yujing always wraps her works in cardboard boxes so that customers can inspect the goods before receiving them.
"It's really well painted!" The background of the flower sea is intricate yet orderly. The little girl sitting in the wheelchair faces the sun, with a pair of wings that seem to grow out of hope on her back. "Although I can't understand the painting, the flower sea and the atmosphere of the light are absolutely beautiful."
Lin Yujing felt that this work dinner had taken the three of them a step forward in their relationship. Chen Jingshu and Chu Yan seemed to have a great change in their opinion of her, at least they no longer made sarcastic remarks.
"The client for this work had a high-level amputation due to a car accident two years ago. She had just emerged from the gloom of self-abandonment, so the theme of the work for her was rebirth and transformation," Lin Yujing explained softly.
How long did it take you to paint this picture?
"About half a month."
Chu Yan carefully put the painting back into the box and asked, "I heard from Qu Xi that she taught at an art training institution during her undergraduate years. Although the income was not as high as that of freelance work, the environment was stable and suitable for girls. Why don't you find an institution too?"
Lin Yujing nodded and said, "I also taught at a training institution during my undergraduate years, but later I joined the Hundred Schools Alliance, which often required me to travel for work. I can control the time to complete commercial projects, so my work is more flexible."
"After hearing so much about Lin today, I admire you even more," Ren Moyin said, glancing at the rearview mirror. "You must really love animals, which is why you were willing to give up a more stable job opportunity."
Lin Yujing nodded thoughtfully, smiled slightly, and said, "Yes. People will make way for what they love."
"Is it because they don't love you that they're so easily given up on?" Chen Jingshu, who had been listening to their conversation in silence for a while, suddenly asked in a rather sad tone.
Lin Yujing bit her lip, her mouth filled with the bitter, fishy taste of blood.
She did have the urge to tell Chen Jingshu the truth, but the events of that year were indeed a deception from the very beginning, an undeniable fact.
However, she was briefly swayed by his love.
Lin Yujing spoke with a bitter tone, still unable to defend herself, only saying, "Everything has two sides. Some people will compromise for their passion, while others will succumb to things they hate for the sake of reality."
"And what about you? Besides giving in to your passion, have you ever succumbed to reality?" Chen Jingshu stared straight into her eyes, not even giving her a chance to look away.
“Yes!” Lin Yujing looked at him and smiled broadly, but there was a bitterness in his eyes that he was trying hard to hide and almost exposed. “For example, work, and my graduation thesis that I revised repeatedly. These are things that I have to give in to because of reality.”
Chen Jingshu stared at her for a long time, his eyes reddening slightly. In the end, he could only tremble his lips bitterly and silently turn his head to look out the car window.
-
The Rolls-Royce drove smoothly, and Lin Yujing felt like she had taken a drowsy nap in the car. Just as she was feeling a bit unsatisfied, someone patted her arm and said, "We've arrived."
She opened her eyes and looked out the car window.
There stood a dark, old house with severely alkali-stained walls, trembling amidst a patch of withered yellow weeds.
If it weren't for the factory right next to her, one would suspect that someone had deliberately tricked her into coming to deliver the painting.
But the suburbs in early winter are pale and desolate, like a deserted area in the apocalypse.
"Are you sure anyone still lives here?" Chen Jingshu frowned, reminding her to double-check. "It looks like a dilapidated building."
Lin Yujing took out her phone and dialed the number of the customer who wanted to buy the painting. "Hello, I've arrived."
A cloying, saccharine static tone burst from the receiver again, "I can already see your car through the window, it's black, right?"
“Yes.” Lin Yujing lowered the car window. A few crows flew by on the gray-white horizon.
A nagging feeling of unease crept in, and a silent struggle began within her: "But here..."
"It's a pity I had my leg amputated above the knee, otherwise I could have gone downstairs to get the painting. I'm so sorry for causing everyone so much trouble." The voice, filled with guilt and self-reproach, was like an arrow piercing Lin Yujing's heart.
"Wait a moment, I'll go up now."
After hanging up the phone, Lin Yujing opened the car door. "Thank you, Mr. Chen. You should go and inspect the factory. I just saw that there's a bus stop right in front of the house."
Chen Jingshu suddenly grabbed her backpack strap, "I'll go up with you, it doesn't look safe here."
"You heard it too, it's just an injured little girl, she's fine." At that moment, a strange thought flashed through her mind. It made her even more reluctant to get too close to Chen Jingshu than the house in front of her, which was like a haunted house. "I went to Tiantongyuan to deliver the drawings before, and it took me half an hour to find it, like a maze. This place is nothing."
She was eager for Chen Jingshu to leave, simply because she was afraid of revealing too much of her hardship and struggles over the years. More devastating to her than his resentment and sarcasm was the renewed protection and tenderness he showed her.
That would give her fantasies.
As a flower blooming in the eternal night, it should not again yearn for the sun.
Are you sure?
"Sure."
After saying that, she quickly got off the car as if she were escaping, saying, "Goodbye."
Chen Jingshu glanced at her hesitantly, then rolled up the car window, leaving only a haughty profile. "Director Ren, let's drive."
-
Watching the Rolls-Royce's taillights disappear around the corner, Lin Yujing adjusted her backpack and walked towards the house.
She initially thought it was just that the houses were old and dilapidated, which was why only the exterior walls were in such a state of disrepair.
It wasn't until we went inside that we discovered the interior was even more dilapidated.
Various plastic garbage bags, fallen leaves, and dust and mud are stuck to the ground and walls, making it look less like a dilapidated house and more like an abandoned and dangerous building.
She could hardly believe how a little girl with an amputated limb could live in such a terrible environment.
But having come this far, she had no reason to run away.
I almost had to bite the bullet and climb to the fifth floor.
Just as Lin Yujing stepped onto the last step, she stepped on something soft, and she screamed in fright.
Compared to the broken windows on the first to fourth floors, the glass on the fifth floor, although intact, was completely covered with mud, preventing any light from getting in.
The corridor was long and dark, without even a single light.
Lin Yujing frowned, bit her lip, and turned on the flashlight, only to find that she had stepped on a dead rat.
A wave of nausea immediately rose in her heart. Just as she moved her feet away, she heard a rustling sound and heard someone running "whoosh" past the corner of the wall.
Lin Yujing couldn't take it anymore and dialed the customer's number again.
But this time, no matter how many times she dialed, no one answered.
"Are you there? Please open the door, or I'm leaving!" Lin Yujing stood at the top of the stairs and shouted loudly inside.
The empty corridor had an eerie, ethereal quality to its echoes.
With a creak, the door to the room at the end of the corridor opened, and a dim yellow light shone out from inside.
She also received a message on her phone: "Sorry, I just fell."
Lin Yujing picked up the painting again and walked towards the end of the corridor.
But when she stood at the door of the open room, she only saw a man who was as thin as a ghost.
Lin Yujing's back began to break out in a cold sweat. "You are... Fan Qiaoqiao?"
"I am Fan Qiaoqiao's father. She is in the bedroom. Please come in." The man looked her up and down, his yellowish, cloudy eyes devoid of any light.
Lin Yujing simply placed the painting against the door frame and said, "I won't go in. You can just settle the remaining payment for me."
"How much? I'll scan your WeChat QR code with my phone."
"3499 yuan."
The man replied that it was no problem and went into the bedroom.
Lin Yujing breathed a sigh of relief and brought up the WeChat payment QR code page.
The man quickly retrieved his phone, returned, and opened WeChat to scan the QR code.
With a "beep," before Lin Yujing could react, her phone was snatched away and smashed to the ground, shattering into pieces.
The man's expression changed the next moment. His rough, dry hands grabbed the wrist holding her phone and tried to pull her into the room.
As the distance closed, the scent of ebony and sandalwood on her body was instantly dispelled, followed by a musty, foul odor that enveloped her.
Lin Yujing remained vigilant. As her wrist was grabbed, she quickly pulled on the iron railing of the outer wall with her other hand, shouting, "Help! Is anyone there?!"
"Are college students these days so lacking in self-protection?" The man seemed to be playing a hunting game with her, not in a hurry to kill his prey instantly, but enjoying the mental torture. "Didn't you know this was an abandoned and dilapidated building before you came here?"
Lin Yujing's eyes filled with tears. "I'll give you money, just let me go."
"Little beauty, I'll give you money, play with me for a bit." The man grinned lewdly, continuing his life-or-death game of tug-of-war with her.
"Let me go! There are people waiting for me downstairs. If I don't go back soon, someone will come looking for me."
"Stop lying to yourself, the car's already gone. Stop struggling, cooperate with me, and I won't kill you."
The early winter wind swept through the hall, making her feel as if she had fallen into an ice cellar.
My heart was slowly drowning in the icy lake; it was a helpless struggle to survive and a desperate desire to die, a feeling of being swallowed by darkness.
Lin Yujing's lips trembled as she looked down at the fruit knife on the coffee table.
She was like Deadpool giving herself orders, determined that if she were really dragged into this, the next moment the knife would either pierce her heart or the man's heart.
Just as she was preparing herself to die, her arm, which was gripping the outer railing, was grasped by a warm and delicate hand.
A calm and understated fragrance, with a hint of bitter ebony, enveloped her once again.
Like a ray of light breaking through the sky, Chen Jingshu stepped on a ground covered with broken fallen leaves, as if driving away all the gloom of her life.
A mature man's anger is always calm and composed. He picked up a glass bottle from somewhere and smashed it hard on the bastard's head.
Then, along with his reason, it shattered.
Chen Jingshu was tall and strong, and he only used six-tenths of his strength to kick the skinny man to the ground.
Then, each foot that landed landed precisely on his head.
He was like a madman who had lost his mind, unleashing ruthless killing moves, his screams echoing throughout the entire corridor.
"You dare touch her!"
"You dare touch her!"
Seeing Chen Jingshu lose control and about to kill someone, Lin Yujing rushed forward.
If you can't hold his hand, you can only hug his waist tightly.
"A-Shu!" Lin Yujing's voice choked and trembled as she finally brought him back to his senses, "I'm alright now."
Chen Jingshu then slowed his movements, looked into her eyes which were filled with scarlet blood vessels, and then hugged her tightly.
The person who had been putting on a brave face for so long finally shed tears when they felt the hope of surviving a disaster.
It's as if the unavoidable storms and gloom of those years have subsided after a long rainy season.
A gentle breeze brings warmth, and all things are reborn. The once desolate dampness is filled by the spring wind.
Like a butterfly drawn to light, she once again plunged into the fire that was destined to kill her.
“I’m here, so you’ll be alright,” he said. Then large tears fell, a mixture of regret, relief, and annoyance. “I’m not afraid anymore.”
As if her life had been saved, Lin Yujing threw herself into his arms and burst into tears.
"A-Shu".
"I thought I was going to die."
During the seven years of separation, she often walked in dark places, always believing that she was not afraid of death.
But just now, the moment she saw Chen Jingshu's eyes.
Only then did I realize that even a rat in the gutter, after committing countless wicked deeds, might still yearn to be a pure and innocent spring breeze in front of their lover.
"I'm sorry, I should have insisted on coming up with you." Chen Jingshu held her tightly, as if he wanted to meld her into his very bones, making her his second rib. "Cry, cry..."
She had been bottling up too much emotion lately, but life had forced her to cope with it numbly, like a block of wood.
Until she was protected, heard his voice, and felt his body temperature, the withered tree finally sprouted blood and flesh, and her heart, like a fragile riverbank during the flood season, collapsed at the slightest blow.
-
After Lin Yujing was carried to the car by Chen Jingshu, her mind began to become increasingly muddled, and she even felt as if she could suffocate and go into shock at any moment.
The memory deep in her mind, which she had desperately tried to hide and suppress, was now being recalled in reverse.
Tearing and pulling relentlessly, without sleep or rest.
Her body temperature began to rise abnormally, and her vision was completely obscured by scarlet spots.
Bloody and dangerous memories flashed through her mind like a slideshow, then overwhelmed her reason.
Wolf packs, howling, chasing, blood.
The uninhabited wilderness possesses the most primal wildness. Aside from the free-spirited scent of earth and grass, the wind carries the very essence of the animal kingdom.
She stared at the man's mutilated limbs, the sound of gunshots ringing out in her ears.
Then you fall into an eternal darkness, losing blood and body temperature.
It turns out that life can be lived while you are fully conscious, and you can clearly feel how your bones and blood gradually separate, and how you gradually lose yourself.
"A-Shu." Lin Yujing curled up, desperately and instinctively moving towards a warm place.
She said: I feel like I'm going to die.
The wind howled across the wasteland, biting and chilling.
Then she saw a familiar figure rush into the no-man's-land, ahead of death, hug her tightly, press his burning lips to her ear, and say, "Jingjing, I'm here."
She said: Ah Shu, I'm sorry.
Chen Jingshu's forehead pressed against hers, and his tears fell onto her shoulder blades.
He said, "Jingjing, I promised you that you would have the privileges of my life."
Lin Yujing couldn't distinguish between reality and dreams. She only felt her mouth filled with salty, bloody saliva. She seemed to be complaining, "A-Shu, but the things you've said lately have hurt me so much."
"Then I'll admit my mistake, okay?"
"But you did nothing wrong."
In her delirium, she still thought about their relationship from beginning to end, and how she was the only one who had been lying and deceiving.
But he still chose to melt away her loneliness once more, his voice low and gentle as he whispered in her ear, "Jingjing, I give up, okay?"
A note from the author:
Lonely Fireworks
Singer: Jingjing
[...][Holding the microphone][The drifting paper boat can't forget the harbor, the fading fireworks can't sever the rainbow, you are the eternal sky in my heart.]
-
Today is a day of shattered Jingjing and heartbroken Xiao Chen.
-
Thank you to all the little angels who voted for me or watered my plants with nutrient solution between 2023-09-10 23:54:57 and 2023-09-11 23:52:51!
Thank you to the little angel who watered the nutrient solution: Awan, 2 bottles;
Thank you so much for your support! I will continue to work hard!
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
