Chapter 47 Lighter "If we break up, let's not see each other again."...
After saying this, Tao Shuran hung up the phone.
The moment she turned and left, she bit her lower lip tightly, resisting the urge to look back at him again.
Liang Yuanjing, I've seen your back so many times, please allow me to leave first this time.
On the other side, Liang Yuanjing returned to the apartment when it was dark.
As soon as I opened the door, the lights in the living room were on. The blanket on the sofa was curled up into a ball, and half of Zhao Zhengnian's arm was exposed. He was catching up on his sleep in a very untidy manner.
Liang Yuanjing didn't bother to give him any attention, so he walked straight into the room to get his clothes and went back to the bathroom to take a shower.
When he came out, Zhao Zhengnian also woke up.
With sleepy eyes open and a long yawn, he asked, "Ajing, what time is it?"
"Beijing time."
Liang Yuanjing was sitting in front of the coffee table peeling an orange. The cold air on his body could not be hidden and blew towards Zhao Zhengnian in waves.
Zhao Zhengnian squinted his eyes and looked at him for a while.
He nodded and said, "What's wrong? Are you in a bad mood?"
Liang Yuanjing replied expressionlessly: "Really? I'm fine."
"A cold shower? Did Instructor Zhou scold you again?"
"Xu Yanyang is picking on you again. I'd say this guy is really boring."
"Did your mother call you?"
"Is your father here to harass you?"
He guessed aimlessly and was about to guess everyone around him.
After peeling the orange, Liang Yuanjing turned around and looked at him.
Seeing that he had no intention of eating, Zhao Zhengnian stretched out his hand and almost opened his mouth to wait for food.
Who knew that with a "plop" sound, Liang Yuanjing raised his hand and threw the orange into the trash can, leaving the peeled orange peel in his hand.
He seemed a little surprised when he realized that he had thrown away the wrong garbage.
Isn't it just the termination of a contractual relationship, something that was expected long ago? Why is he so disappointed?
Liang Yuanjing pursed his lips, leaned on the sofa with his hands outstretched, and lay down lazily looking at the ceiling.
There was no emotion in the voice.
"Dumped, alright."
"Is this true?" Zhao Zhengnian joked, "Will handsome Liang also have his Waterloo day?"
"real."
Liang Yuanjing raised his head and let out a long breath.
"And right now I'm very unhappy, and that's true."
He placed his palm against his chest and said slowly:
"It seems to be true that I like her a little bit."
"ah?"
Zhao Zhengnian jumped up from the sofa and yelled, "Liang Yuanjing, your cracks finally blossomed!"
Liang Yuanjing covered his ears with his hands, opened his eyelids and glanced at him, his tone very calm.
"You have to pay for the broken sofa."
"Don't worry about the sofa." Zhao Zhengnian sat down next to him, more enthusiastic than he, the person involved.
"You fell in love with Tao Shuran, and she dumped you."
Liang Yuanjing put his hands behind his head and said "hmm" nonchalantly.
The moonlight outside the window climbed all over the wall. A pot of spider plant on the flower stand was blooming extremely vigorously, hanging down one section at a time. Liang Yuanjing's eyes fell down inch by inch, recalling many times in the past.
My first reaction when I heard that she liked someone else was actually jealousy.
Including the day when he tentatively asked her whether she liked him, it was actually just a question to himself.
The belated emotions floated up like a fishing line, hooking up a huge iceberg that had been lurking for a long time.
At this moment, those ignored emotions take root and sprout like love and surface.
Liang Yuanjing suddenly stood up, picked up his coat and was about to go out.
Zhao Zhengnian followed him and shouted, "Ajing, it's almost ten o'clock, where are you going?"
Liang Yuanjing said without turning his head: "I'm going to find her."
*
At ten o'clock in the evening, Tao Shuran hid in the bathroom and cried secretly twice.
The lights in the dormitory would be turned off in more than an hour. She looked at herself in the mirror with red eyes, lowered her head, washed her face with cold water, and forced herself to calm down.
About five minutes later, she opened the door and walked out.
Because of the unpleasantness with Luo Qiuya, the entire dormitory fell into a deathly silence.
No one dared to speak up, as they always felt like something was about to explode.
Tao Shuran sat in her seat, took a deep breath, and was just about to put on her headphones to listen to music when Tan Yueyi next to her slowly reached out and handed her a handful of candy.
Tan Yueyi carefully looked at her expression and said, "Of course, there seems to be someone downstairs in the dormitory."
She spoke very vaguely, but Tao Shuran immediately knew who this person was.
She lowered her eyelashes and said "hmm", without saying any extra words or making any other movements.
Five minutes later, a message popped up.
"Liang Yuanjing": Come down.
"Ban Yuexing": If I had to say something, I already made it very clear on the phone yesterday.
"Liang Yuanjing": I sneaked out. I didn't want to be discovered and locked up tomorrow, so I came down early.
"Liang Yuanjing": I just want to see you before the end of today, nothing else.
After reading his message, Tao Shuran closed his eyes and thought for a while.
She slowly stood up, put on a coat, picked up the things on the table and went downstairs.
Not far away, Liang Yuanjing was supporting a blue bicycle, his denim jacket outlining his narrow waist. He stood in a slightly casual posture, his eyes looking lazily ahead.
Almost the moment Tao Shuran appeared, his eyes were already on her.
Tao Shuran couldn't stand his gaze, so she lowered her head and walked over.
The wind blew through the trouser legs and made people feel cold.
Before she could speak, Liang Yuanjing raised his chin and said, "Don't say sorry to me again."
Tao Shuran bit her lower lip deeply.
She stopped talking and just handed him the contents of her phone in silence.
Liang Yuanjing glanced at it, his face showing no emotion, and he didn't reach out to take it.
Ask her: "What do you mean?"
"It means the end."
Tao Shuran lowered his head and said word by word: "I checked, your lighter is quite expensive, it doesn't fit in my hand."
"Tao Shuran, look at me and tell me what you mean."
Tao Shuran slowly raised her head, revealing her pale and haggard face and a pair of eyes that could not hide her fatigue. She was no longer bright and charming, because the hurt she had suffered in this relationship was clearly revealed in front of him.
She said softly, "I don't want to pretend to be your girlfriend anymore. I clearly like you, but I have to pretend that I don't care. I also don't want to secretly look at you through everyone else."
"All the girls in this world have the right to confess their love to you, but I remain silent."
Liang Yuanjing whispered, "I'm sorry."
Tao Shuran smiled bitterly and shook his head: "I want to like you myself, why are you sorry?"
"I'm sorry for not realizing this relationship sooner." His voice was low and deep, and it always sounded like a lingering dream.
But now the dream is about to end.
Tao Shuran took a deep breath and his eyes fell on the sycamore tree behind him.
She asked him casually, "Do you know what it feels like to have a crush on someone?"
Without waiting for Liang Yuanjing to answer, she continued talking to herself.
"I'm afraid you'll look at me, but I'm also afraid you won't look at me. I'm always wandering on this wavering antenna. If it weren't for this diary, I might never have said your name."
Tao Shuran forced a smile, looked at him sincerely and said -
"Secret love is really painful, Liang Yuanjing."
This sentence made Liang Yuanjing silent for a long time. Late autumn blew away the hair on his forehead, revealing a pair of dark and bright eyes.
At this moment, he stared at her without blinking, with all kinds of emotions surging in his eyes like ink.
After a while, Tao Shuran heard his voice.
He said, "Don't have a crush on me next time."
She was stunned and subconsciously asked, "What?"
Liang Yuanjing's Adam's apple rolled, and his dark eyes looked at her with complete concentration, his whole body showing a special seriousness.
"I say, do you want us to try it?"
"What."
Tao Shuran stood there in a daze, even tilting her head in disbelief, feeling a raging tsunami engulfing her, and she was so shocked that she couldn't make any sound.
"Listen to me next."
Liang Yuanjing swallowed his saliva, his heart suddenly beating violently in his chest. He felt a strong sense of tension that he had never experienced in any flight training.
This feeling of adrenaline rushing made him speak faster unconsciously. He pronounced each word accurately and looked at her seriously.
"Tao Shuran, before I came to see you, I realized that I seemed to like you a little bit."
"I couldn't get a taxi when I was leaving the school gate, and I was afraid that if I didn't say something, I wouldn't be able to see you tonight, so I spotted a bicycle on the side of the road and rode over here."
"My heart was beating fast the whole way. I started to realize belatedly that I might have fallen in love with you a long time ago. I haven't figured out the exact moment yet."
"When I parked the car, I was thinking, if you want, I can apply not to go to Jingbei in my junior year."
"Can't."
After hearing the last sentence, Tao Shuran suddenly interrupted him.
She was bathed in the silence of the night, her eyes full of clarity and determination, and she asked him in an exceptionally calm tone:
"Liang Yuanjing, are you really ready to give up your dream for me?"
Liang Yuanjing lowered his eyes and looked at the lighter in his hand, flipping the lid with his fingertips and playing with it from time to time.
He did not give an immediate answer. His eyes were dark and unclear, and at this moment, all the emotions were chaotic.
Tao Shuran smiled knowingly: "Actually, you haven't made a decision yet."
"Liang Yuanjing, wavering between dreams and emotions, I can see that you are acting on impulse. Maybe after a while, even you will realize that your affection for me is nothing more than sympathy for my five-year secret crush on you."
Tao Shuran said firmly: "Liang Yuanjing, actually you don't like me at all."
It's just pity, sympathy, and a gentleman's consideration and tolerance.
Tao Shuran was so sad that he almost trembled.
Coincidentally, Liang Yuanjing took a step forward at this time.
She immediately hunched her shoulders like a frightened bird and pleaded painfully, "Liang Yuanjing, please don't come near me again."
"Every step you take towards me that you haven't completely fallen in love with me makes me sad."
Liang Yuanjing stopped where he was, looking at her sad face, his lips moving as if he wanted to say something but stopped.
He heard Tao Shuran recount everything that had happened in the past few years in a tone that was uncomfortable and almost calm.
"Every time I stand here, I wonder how much luck I need to have to meet you here."
Tao Shuran walked slowly forward to the abandoned building next to the dormitory. She used to stand here often to watch the sun rise and set, and see him standing at the end of the training team, slowly running towards her in the sun.
No one can understand the feeling of secret love.
She said slowly: "Every chance encounter from your perspective is actually a thousand reunions that I have painstakingly planned."
"Now, can you understand the pain of secret love?"
Liang Yuanjing leaned on the railing with one hand, the corner of his clothes was blown up by the wind. He turned his head to look at her and understood the meaning behind her words.
He pursed his lips and asked unwillingly:
"So my proximity only makes you painful, sad, and grief-stricken?"
Not exactly.
The pain was her own choice. What made Tao Shuran even more sad than the pain was that her love caused him trouble and even sacrifice.
This will make her feel that her liking is a fault in itself.
Tao Shuran hardened his heart, looked at him and said resolutely -
"yes."
Liang Yuanjing put the tip of his tongue against his cheek, and couldn't tell what it tasted like.
He raised his eyebrows and asked her again.
"So you don't have any feelings for me at all, and you're just playing around?"
Tao Shuran avoided answering this question.
Unable to suppress her emotions, she cried and said, "I don't want to like you anymore, Liang Yuanjing."
"Let's break up."
"Just give me a break."
Things had already come to this point. Liang Yuanjing's eyelids twitched, and his rapid heartbeat returned to normal.
He raised his chin slightly and looked over the railing into the distance. The expression on his face became much more restrained and returned to his cold and arrogant attitude.
He just sneered and raised the corners of his lips in self-mockery.
"Do you like me making you suffer like this?"
Tao Shuran bit her lower lip, the taste of blood spreading in her mouth. In the dark night like thick ink, she turned and left in front of him for the first time.
Liang Yuanjing lowered his head and looked nonchalantly at the metal lighter she threw to him. The indigo flame bloomed in his palm, illuminating his dull eyes.
I just like it a little bit, not to the point of life and death.
Liang Yuanjing was also arrogant. In the dark night, he leaned on the railing and slowly finished a cigarette. The blue-gray smoke curled up, and the slender figure of a desolate girl with her eyebrows raised in the wind.
She left without looking back.
After a while, he crushed out the cigarette butt and his voice became cold.
"Tao Shuran."
"If we break up, let's not see each other again."
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