Chapter 57: Lack of Mind "I lost her."
"The moon will always be the moon, but it is no longer mine alone."
After returning, Liang Yuanjing received a reply to this email.
Bluish-gray smoke rose up, and he stared at the email for a long time, unable to speak.
The lighter placed casually on the table was also lonely. At that time, he smiled and threw it into her arms.
Is it an impulse? Quitting smoking for one person.
Yes, but not entirely.
Liang Yuanjing raised his head slightly, staring at the dark ceiling, but her face unconsciously appeared in front of him.
It turned out that he had already started to like her at that time.
It's just that we discovered it too late and missed the time when we should have been in love.
*
The two-month project ended, and with the arrival of autumn, Tao Shuran and his team prepared to return to Fuqing.
On the day I returned, Liang Yuanjing did not show up.
It was his roommate Compar who drove over to see them off.
Comparison was always smiling and easy-going, and he spoke like he was rapping, without stopping.
Tao Shuran couldn't stand such passionate personality and tugged at Jin Boyu's sleeve to let him deal with it.
Jin Boyu took a look and kicked Gu Songnian without any hesitation.
Gu Songnian understood what he meant and immediately interrupted Kang Bo's long speech.
"Brother Kangbo, is your pilot training usually very hard?"
"Do you still have time for love?"
"Do you have a partner?"
The topic came to a sudden halt, and Compaq said, "Uh," and then said in a low voice, "No."
Gu Songnian approached enthusiastically: "How about it, do you want me to introduce you?"
"What do you like? Bigger or smaller than you?"
Tao Shuran and Jin Boyu were almost unable to contain their laughter in the back.
This is Gu Songnian's ultimate move. Usually when he encounters some situations where people are talking endlessly, he will take the initiative to use this move to end the topic.
Tao Shuran lowered her head and smiled gently. The moment she looked up, her eyes met Kang Bo's in the rearview mirror.
Her heart skipped a beat and she said to herself, "Oh no."
Sure enough, the next second, Kang Bo asked her, "I wonder what type of boys Teacher Xiao Tao likes?"
Gu Songnian let out an "ah," his mouth moving faster than his brain.
"You like my junior sister like this?"
"What nonsense are you talking about!" Comparison suddenly became excited and his speech was not very clear.
He replied dryly, "I'm asking on behalf of someone else."
"Oh." Gu Songnian spoke frankly, "For whom?"
Under the car seat, Jin Boyu kicked him again.
Gu Songnian shouted unhappily: "Brother, why did you kick me again!"
Jin Boyu held his forehead: "Because you are stupid."
Seeing that the situation was getting out of control, Tao Shuran spoke in a gentle voice.
“I don’t have a specific type of favorite. Liking is a feeling.”
Compaq said "hmm" thoughtfully.
After sending the person to the airport, he immediately stopped and sent a message to Liang Yuanjing.
"Brother, I've asked around for you. The girl said that liking someone is a feeling, not a specific person."
Liang Yuanjing quickly replied to the message - "Thanks, brother."
"I'll treat you to dinner when I get back to Fuqing."
Kang Bo was so polite that he scratched his head a little embarrassedly: "It's okay, brother, I didn't help much. I feel embarrassed for what you did."
Liang Yuanjing: "Thanks for your help."
Liang Yuanjing: "There's no specific person, which means she doesn't have anyone she likes right now."
Liang Yuanjing: "She might still like me."
The series of messages distracted Compaq. He turned the steering wheel and took the time to look at the message on the congested road.
After reading the three messages, he opened his mouth in surprise.
Ha, he is worthy of being Brother Liang, top-notch understanding.
In the waiting room, Tao Shuran was carrying a bag of coffee drinks, four cups, just enough for each person in the calligraphy and painting group.
"Teacher Lin, this cup of hot milk is for you."
Lin Tingzhou said unhappily, "I want coffee too."
Tao Shuran smiled and sat beside her: "The doctor said you are calcium deficient. Coffee will affect calcium absorption."
"Did that kid Ajing tell you?" Lin Tingzhou took it and muttered, "He's even more nagging than his grandfather."
Tao Shuran smiled. She never expected that one day Liang Yuanjing would become the target of complaints and nagging.
She whispered, "You haven't been home for two months. Grandpa must miss you very much."
"He's gone."
Lin Tingzhou smiled and said, "I left last year, and there's no one at home waiting for me to return."
One word caused a huge uproar.
Tao Shuran was stunned as she recalled the scenes of the whole year last year. She opened her mouth, but had a lot to say but stopped herself.
The final memory freezes on the time when they attended the exchange meeting in northern Beijing last year.
"So that was the reason you lost your concentration and forgot your lines on stage?"
"Well, I saw him for the last time in the hospital that night."
Lin Tingzhou still had a smile on her face, and the wrinkles at the corners of her eyes were full of traces of time. But even though the smile was still there, her eyes couldn't help but turn red.
"He told me not to cry, and I promised him that I would never cry again in the future."
Tao Shuran's eyes became sore after hearing this. She gently held Lin Tingzhou's hand and comforted him, "Being able to stay together with love until old age is a kind of perfection in itself."
"By the way, did you know that the flight from Jingbei back to Fuqing that night was operated by Ajing?"
Lin Tingzhou looked at her with a gentle gaze and said, "Ajing always had a wish. He hoped that his grandfather, who suffers from Alzheimer's disease, could see him fly with his own eyes. Finally, his wish came true. In his last moments, his grandfather recalled his glorious life as a pilot."
"But he told me that day that life is always full of regrets."
Tao Shuran followed up by asking, "What is his regret?"
"It's you."
Lin Tingzhou recalled: "That night, he held his grandfather's hand and knelt in front of the bed. In all these years, that was the first time I saw him dejected. He said with dejection -"
"I'm sorry, Grandpa, I couldn't bring the girl I like to you."
"I lost her."
Tao Shuran could no longer hold back the tears in her eyes, and a big tear rolled down from the corner of her eye.
She took a deep breath and said slowly, "So he was in Jingbei that time too."
This was the only time they met.
They have been missing out over the years.
While she was in Fuqing, he was training in Jingbei.
Later she came to northern Beijing and he went to another city.
The crowd is so hurried that we will never see each other again.
"You two kids are both responsible for handling this relationship. I won't interfere."
"But there are a few things I still need to tell you."
Lin Tingzhou took a sip of milk and spoke slowly.
"During your first Mid-Autumn Festival in Fuqing after your graduate studies, you had a big fight with your family and ran a high fever in the dormitory. I received a call from your roommate at home. That night, it was Ajing who bought medicine and sent it over to take care of you."
"The fireworks you saw rising in the sky during the Spring Festival one year were also blooming for you."
"Also, every year on your birthday, the amusement park reserves a ticket for you to the Ferris wheel."
"He has always had you in his heart all these years." Lin Tingzhou tilted his head to look at her, his voice gentle.
"What about you? You often look up at the sky out of habit. Are you simply looking at the moon, or are you waiting for that passing plane?"
Tao Shuran twirled the corner of her clothes with her ten fingers and bit her lower lip habitually.
Lin Tingzhou smiled and patted her shoulder, handing her the coffee.
"It doesn't matter if I can't give you an answer. It's been five years. I think Ajing is sincere in waiting."
She joked, "Besides, if a man wants to pursue a beautiful girl, doesn't he have to go through a lot of hardships?"
Before boarding the plane, Tao Shuran remembered that the night before they said goodbye, Fang Qingyi held her in his arms and talked all night long.
She asked, "Is there really no hope for you and Liang Yuanjing?"
After being separated for so many years, it seems that many people are sighing for their ending.
But only Tao Shuran knew that their love had never begun, and those enviable details were nothing but her bitter unrequited love.
She said slowly: "Well, there shouldn't be any more."
"After all, life is more than just love."
When boarding the flight back to Fuqing, Tao Shuran was still clear-headed.
There is an impossibility that there is a world of difference between her and Liang Yuanjing.
Halfway through the flight, there was a sudden and violent turbulence, and the entire cabin was plunged into a noisy atmosphere.
Tao Shuran took off his blindfold and listened to the flight attendant reminding all passengers on the radio to pay attention to safety and suspend the use of the toilet.
After a while, the turbulence in the flight disappeared and the plane returned to a stable state of flight.
A deep and mellow male voice slowly rang out from the radio station.
"We have now passed through this period of turbulence smoothly. Welcome aboard flight G7311. I am Captain Liang Yuanjing of this flight. I wish you all a safe journey. After all the hardships, we will eventually meet again."
Hearing the familiar voice, Tao Shuran looked up in disbelief, almost thinking that he was hallucinating.
Lin Tingzhou, who was sitting next to him, chuckled: "This brat actually chased after me."
No matter how far we go, we will meet again.
Somehow, Tao Shuran understood that this was the answer to her words "never see you again".
In the cockpit, Liang Yuanjing quickly pressed the PTT button to request a lower altitude from air traffic control, and immediately turned on the "Fasten seat belt" indicator light.
"Beicheng District dispatch, Beijing Airlines 7311."
"Beijing Airlines Flight 7311, Beicheng District, please speak."
"Beicheng District Dispatch, Beijing Airlines 7311, we are experiencing continuous turbulence at an altitude of 7,500 meters. Requesting to ascend to 9,500 meters."
After the communication was completed, Liang Yuanjing glanced at the situation and took over calmly.
"I'll take charge."
Feng Ruoji, who was in the PF position, immediately responded: "You take control."
The first second after receiving the response, Liang Yuanjing grabbed the control wheel, and in the violent turbulent airflow, the plane reached a new altitude at a gentle and steady speed.
After Liang Yuanjing finished his broadcast, Feng Ruoji couldn't help but admire him.
"Brother Liang, this is a show."
"You're talking so romantically, are you trying to pick up girls?"
"Yeah." Liang Yuanjing's lips curled up slightly.
"My ex-girlfriend is here."
*
After returning to his home after a long absence, Tao Shuran breathed a sigh of relief.
When I opened the door, the house was not as warm and tidy as I had imagined. It seemed like it was full of garbage.
The express boxes that spread from the dining room to the living room left no room for people to step, and there were several empty wine bottles on the coffee table.
Zhao Yanru came out of the kitchen carrying a fruit plate, looked at her calmly and said, "Yes, your father and I are separated."
Tao Shuran was stunned at first, but then he felt it was natural.
They have been arguing for the past two years, and all the emotions that were suppressed during her college entrance examination have burst out in the past two years.
Human emotions are like the waves hidden on the seashore, which can never be hidden or concealed.
One day these emotions will burst out in a huge wave that you can't imagine.
Tao Shuran has a deep understanding of this.
She said "hmm", squatted down and slowly cleaned up.
After she graduated, Zhao Yanyun paid the down payment to buy the house and took out a 30-year loan. She has been successful in her career in the past two years and has paid back a lot of the money in advance.
"This house belongs to me, and the one in my hometown belongs to your father. The cooling-off period for divorce is 30 days. When the time is up, we will complete the formalities."
Zhao Yanru smiled and said, "We can say that we parted ways amicably."
After twenty years of emotional entanglement, the relationship ended with a peaceful breakup.
Tao Shuran asked in a daze: "Don't you love each other anymore?"
"What's the point of talking about love at this age? Many things are different now."
Zhao Yanru raised her lips and said, "Our lives are worlds apart. He doesn't understand the areas I'm involved in, and I can't understand his hobbies."
"By the way, why don't you clean up and meet a friend with me later?"
At this age, Tao Shuran is particularly sensitive to the three words "meeting friends".
She asked, "Which friend? Is it Aunt Song?"
"No, I have a friend whose son is about your age." Zhao Yanyun glanced at him and continued, "Go change into a skirt."
Tao Shuran refused: "I don't want to go."
Zhao Yanyun glanced at her and said weakly, "You're going to be like this right after you got back? Mom really doesn't have the energy to argue with you right now."
She was very weak when she said this, and when she squatted down to pick up trash, she accidentally scratched her hand with broken porcelain pieces.
Tao Shuran hurried back to the room to get her a Band-Aid. She lowered her head to see the dark spots under Zhao Yanyun's eyes, and finally compromised.
The dinner venue was set at a restaurant in Fuqing.
Tao Shuran actually couldn't remember the dishes that day very clearly. She only remembered that the boy came with his mother. The atmosphere between them was very depressing, but the two mothers were chatting very enthusiastically.
After a while, Zhao Yanyun took the initiative to suggest: "Let the two children be alone for a while, let's go out for a walk."
There were only two of them left in the place, and the boy took the initiative to pour her a glass of water.
He asked with concern: "Is the food not to your taste? It seems you didn't eat much."
Tao Shuran: "No, I just came back from North City, and I'm still a little out of shape."
"Oh, what do you do for a living?"
The boy asked, "In the system?"
Tao Shuran uttered "Ah", lowered his head, reached out and touched his earlobe, and said softly, "I'm still in school."
"This is my third year of graduate school."
"Oh, you're quite knowledgeable. What are your plans for the future? I heard it's hard to find a job for someone like you who majors in archaeology."
"Are you planning to take the museum exam?"
Tao Shuran laughed dryly: "I haven't thought about what will happen next."
"This rose baked milk is quite delicious. Would you like to try it?"
The conversation came to a brief pause as the scorching afternoon sun scorched the glass windows unscrupulously.
Tao Shuran felt a headache and turned to tap his temples against the glass window.
Just looking at the person outside the window——
Liang Yuanjing didn't know how long he had been standing there. He was wearing a dark black flight jacket, light gray jeans, and a pair of sunglasses.
His tall stature is particularly eye-catching. Located in the bustling city center, his outstanding appearance has already attracted groups of people to gather around him.
Just when Tao Shuran was thinking about how to solve this situation, he saw someone coming from behind Liang Yuanjing.
He leaned over to borrow a light, and turned his angular face away without even glancing at her, his coldness and indifference evident.
Tao Shuran calmed down.
On the other side, Liang Yuanjing walked nonchalantly.
Feng Ruoji said with a smile: "Brother Liang, why are you standing at the door of the restaurant staring for no reason?"
"It's like staring at your girlfriend."
"You're right." Liang Yuanjing put one hand in his pocket and said casually, "My ex-girlfriend is on a blind date in there."
Feng Ruoji exclaimed, "Ah!" "Little girl, how much are you selling the flowers for?"
Liang Yuanjing took out his phone, bent down to scan the code, took out a cigarette, held it in his hand, then patted the girl on the shoulder and said:
"I want them all. Please help me deliver them to my sister inside."
The little girl asked crisply, "Brother, what do you want me to say for you?"
Liang Yuanjing thought for a moment and said, "Ask her if she's willing to date me."
"If one doesn't work, try two. If two doesn't work, try three."
"What if I give all the flowers to my sister and she still doesn't want to?"
The little girl said innocently: "My mother has a bookstore there. Brother, you should buy all the flowers."
Feng Ruoji burst out laughing: "You are quite good at business, little girl."
"Little money-grubber." Liang Yuanjing squatted down and pinched the little girl's face. "If you can help me win over the girl in there, I will go to your mother's flower shop to buy a bouquet of flowers every day."
…
When the atmosphere was at its most awkward, Tao Shuran received a rose.
At first, she thought it was the work of a boy. The two of them looked at each other for a while, and then a little girl popped up.
His round eyes stared at her and he recited his lines in a very regular manner.
"Sister, there's a guy out there asking if you'd like to date him."
The little girl took out roses one after another from behind her back like a magic trick. More than a dozen roses clustered together like a blooming flower bush.
No one doesn't like flowers. Tao Shuran was amused.
Such a thoughtful gesture made the meal seem tacky. The boy opposite began to back off and picked up his phone to say goodbye to her.
"I'll settle that bill first. I have some more things to do and I'll leave first."
"Wait a minute." Tao Shuran took out his cell phone. "How much is it? I'll give it to you later."
a money basically means no further development.
The boy glanced at her and simply took out the payment code. "185.4, just transfer it to me directly. We don't need to add contact information."
A meal that ends up being so bland is just too boring.
Tao Shuran poured the remaining small cup of roasted milk to the little girl and asked her casually, "Who asked you to send flowers?"
"The one outside the door."
There is no one outside the door.
But Tao Shuran knew who it was.
She found his WeChat ID and called him. After three seconds of ringing, the call was quickly connected.
"What's up?"
Tao Shuran took a breath: "You didn't send the flowers?"
"I gave it to you." Liang Yuanjing nodded calmly.
Tao Shuran: "My blind date mistakenly thought you liked me and ran away."
"Student Tao, let me correct you. This is not a misunderstanding, it's a fact."
Liang Yuanjing's voice on the other end of the phone was tinged with smile, and he spoke to her slowly.
Tao Shuran said angrily: "Because of you, my blind date ran away."
"This isn't the first time."
The same thing happened to Zhao Han last time. When he saw Liang Yuanjing, he immediately turned into a fanboy and completely forgot about the blind date.
"You are so anxious, Tao Shuran."
Liang Yuanjing chuckled, and raised his voice, "Can I compensate you with one?"
"What do you think of me?"
Tao Shuran: "...not very good."
"So picky."
He was still teasing her with a smile: "I will give you two villas and a western-style house as a dowry. Please think about it."
…
Five seconds after the phone call was hung up, Feng Ruoji finished eating a whole piece of malt sugar while standing on the side of the road.
The candy was so sticky that he couldn't speak. His face wrinkled and he made a "tsk" sound.
"Captain Liang, your smile is a little too cheap."
Liang Yuanjing slowly put his phone back into his pocket, and the smile on his face gradually faded.
She turned around and raised an eyebrow at him, snorting softly.
"It's none of your business."
"Those of you who have never been in love don't understand."
*
At 5:10 in the afternoon, Tao Shuran took a taxi back home.
It ended earlier than she expected. She was so sleepy that she couldn't open her eyes, so she went to the store at the door and bought two bottles of drinks to take back.
Fu Changpei was sitting at the counter, cashing out.
Tao Shuran rubbed his eyes, thinking it was an illusion.
Fu Changpei took the initiative to stand up and greeted: "Long time no see."
It’s been a long time.
The last time they met was when she graduated from college, right?
Tao Shuran remembered that day very clearly. After graduation, everyone went their separate ways.
He was the only one interning in Shanghai, and he came all the way back to take a graduation photo with her.
"Why did you come back so suddenly?"
"I'm on holiday to visit grandma, so I'd rather go for green, right?"
Fu Changpei took out two bottles of green apple flavored soda from the freezer, looked at her helplessly and said, "You should drink less carbonated drinks for your teeth."
Tao Shuran covered her ears: "I can't hear you, I can't hear you, I can't hear anything you say."
Two years ago, because of severe toothache, she ran to Shanghai for medical treatment. The medical level in Shanghai is much more advanced. Hearing that Fu Changpei was there, Tao Shuran tentatively sent him a message.
Unexpectedly, he took her on a day trip to the hospital, and arranged everything from registration to queuing.
Compared to the three of them who were running around in their lives, only Fu Changpei was moving forward steadily over the years.
"Who are you giving this medicine to?" Tao Shuran asked casually, biting the bottle cap while glancing at a bag of medicine on the counter.
"You really don't want your teeth anymore?"
Fu Changpei took the wrench from the wall, raised his hand, and the bottle cap fell to the ground with a crisp sound.
He said in a normal tone: "Ajing has a fever, let me give him some medicine."
"He has a fever?"
Tao Shuran said casually, "Don't you need to see a doctor? Medicine can only treat common colds."
Fu Changpei looked at her deeply, which made Tao Shuran feel uncomfortable. She lowered her head to drink the drink in an attempt to hide her guilt. She loved the sour and sweet taste.
He suddenly suggested, "How about you come with me to see him later?"
"No, it's not appropriate for me to go."
Tao Shuran waved his hand: "That's it, I'm going back to catch up on some sleep."
"Tao Shuran."
Fu Changpei suddenly called her and said softly, "Liang Yuanjing likes you."
"Are you really ready to give up on him?"
Tao Shuran froze in place.
She turned around, the smile on her face faded a little, and she said jokingly, "Why, it's been so many years, you don't still want to match us up, do you?"
"Won't."
Fu Changpei smiled gently, and his reserved and gentle eyes suddenly became bright the moment he looked at her.
He looked at her and said slowly: "Because I like you too."
-----------------------
The author has something to say: This chapter is written by someone who is sad, crying tvt
The norm in life is missing out and having regrets, and the norm in secret love is that it is difficult to express love.
In fact, compared to having a secret love come true, I think being able to tell the other person that I like you in real life is already a brave and fulfilling thing.
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