Since the farce of the "Grand Tutor's Bounty" took place in the Golden Palace, Emperor Xiao Che has realized that his dignity as an emperor is facing the most severe challenge since his ascension to the throne.
This challenge did not come from the old ministers of the previous dynasty who were stirring up trouble, nor from the enemy country that was eyeing the border with covetous eyes, but from the baby room of Kunning Palace, from that little thing who, apart from eating, drinking, defecating, and sleeping, could only cry loudly and was as soft as a ball of glutinous rice cake—his eldest son, Xiao Mu'an.
In the imperial court, he could decide life and death with a single word and make decisions for the entire nation with a single document; yet in the nursery, he couldn't even stop his own son from crying.
This is utterly disgraceful to the Emperor!
Especially after witnessing Lin Wanwan's skillful and effortless way of holding the baby, Xiao Che's sense of frustration reached its peak.
Lin Wanwan leaned slightly to the side, her arms forming a comfortable arc, the little "dumpling" nestled in her arms, its head resting peacefully, its little mouth smacking contentedly—a picture of serene tranquility. She could even hum an unknown tune softly while holding it, instructing the palace maids to prepare warm water. That composure and elegance filled Xiao Che with both envy and jealousy.
He, the emperor of the Great Liang, was capable of governing the country with his literary skills and conquering it with his military prowess. Could he not even learn how to hold a baby weighing less than ten pounds?
No! Absolutely not!
A fierce competitive spirit, stemming from the emperor's instincts, ignited within him.
"Someone come here!" Xiao Che ordered in a deep voice, his face showing the seriousness of someone about to tackle a major strategic problem.
The eunuch immediately bowed and stepped forward. "By my decree, summon the most senior and experienced midwife in the palace immediately! I... wish to personally inquire of her!"
Half an hour later, Liu, a midwife with gray hair who had delivered two princes and three princesses in the palace, was kneeling trembling in the nursery of Kunning Palace, her whole body shaking like a leaf in the wind.
She couldn't understand what heinous crime she had committed to be summoned here by His Majesty, and why His Majesty looked at her with a more serious expression than he did at prisoners about to be executed.
"Raise your head." Xiao Che sat in the main seat, his voice icy.
"This servant...this servant dares not..." Liu the midwife was so frightened that she didn't dare to lift her head.
"I command you to carry it, so carry it."
The midwife, Liu, trembled as she raised her head, meeting the emperor's unfathomable eyes. She felt a chill run from the soles of her feet to the top of her head, and almost fainted on the spot.
However, the emperor's next words left her completely blank.
“You,” Xiao Che pointed to the “Tuanzi” who had just woken up and was being held by the wet nurse, and commanded in an unquestionable tone, “teach me how to properly hold a child.”
"Huh?" Liu the midwife was stunned, wondering if she was old and hard of hearing and was hallucinating.
Sitting on the soft couch to the side, watching all this with a smile, Lin Wanwan finally couldn't help but chuckle. She said gently to the midwife who was almost scared out of her wits, "Mama Liu, don't be afraid. His Majesty is just... eager to learn. You can demonstrate His Majesty's most standard way of holding a baby."
Reassured by the Empress, Liu the midwife finally came to her senses. Although still nervous, she understood her mission. Trembling, she took the little prince from the wet nurse and began the most thrilling "teaching" session of her career.
"Your Majesty, there are two main ways to carry the young master," Liu the midwife's voice was trembling. "The first is the horizontal carrying method."
As she spoke, she carefully demonstrated. One hand steadily supported the baby's bottom and waist, while the other arm was bent to protect the baby's head and cervical spine, allowing the little one's entire body to lie securely in her arms.
"The key is that the head and neck must be supported and not suspended in the air, the arms must be steady, and the movements must be gentle..."
Xiao Che watched intently from the side. His eyes, which had reviewed countless memorials and seen through countless conspiracies, were now analyzing the midwife's every movement and the distribution of force without blinking. He even broke it all down into several steps in his mind and performed a precise logical deduction.
Yes, it's not difficult. It's simply a matter of applying mechanics and structure appropriately.
The midwife then demonstrated the "upright holding method," which involves placing the baby on her shoulder, supporting the bottom with one hand and gently stroking the back with the other.
"This method allows the young master to see more scenery, and it can also... it can also help him burp."
Xiao Che nodded repeatedly, a look of understanding on his face. Above his head, a cartoon figure wearing a graduation cap pushed up his glasses, a confident expression slowly appearing on his face—[So that's how it is, quite simple.jpg].
Having fully grasped the theoretical knowledge, the next step is practical operation.
The midwife, Liu, asked respectfully, "Your Majesty, would you like to... give it a try?"
Xiao Che nodded reservedly, but did not immediately take the soft little thing. As an emperor, he was meticulous in everything he did. So, he pointed to a brocade-wrapped pillow on the soft couch beside him and said in a deep voice, "Practice with this first."
This caution only deepened Lin Wanwan's smile.
The midwife and the palace maid quickly handed over the pillow.
Xiao Che took a deep breath, recalling the "theoretical points" from earlier, and stretched out his hands, which had once held the power of life and death.
Then, everyone present witnessed a spectacular sight that they would never forget.
Their emperor, his arms stiff as iron, fingers taut, gripped the poor pillow with an air of almost criminal arrest. Instead of gently embracing it, he held it suspended in mid-air, his arms maintaining a subtle and distant distance from his body, as if it were not a soft pillow but a powder keg ready to explode at any moment.
His eyes were focused and alert, his posture as steady as a mountain. He didn't look like he was learning to hold a child, but rather... rather like he was escorting a hostage of extremely important status! The pillow in his hand seemed as if he could snap its neck at any moment with a merciless "crack".
The midwife, Liu, watched with twitching eyelids. She wanted to remind His Majesty to be gentle several times, but the words were always swallowed back by Xiao Che's serious aura.
Lin Wanwan quietly turned her head away, covered her mouth with a handkerchief, and her shoulders trembled slightly uncontrollably.
"Hmm, I feel... almost there." Xiao Che was completely unaware of how terrifying his posture while hugging the pillow was. He thought he had mastered the essence, so he put down the pillow that had suffered so much and looked intently at the real protagonist—"Tuanzi" lying in the wet nurse's arms, curiously opening his big, dark eyes.
The real challenge begins now!
Xiao Che stepped forward and dismissed the wet nurse. He bent down and took a deep breath at his small, soft, milk-scented biological son.
Come on, let me see just how difficult you are to deal with!
He slowly reached out, his movements a hundred times stiffer than when he had been holding the pillow. His fingertips, with an almost tragic air of resignation, touched the swaddling clothes covering the infant.
It feels soft and warm to the touch, and it even... moves?
Xiao Che's heart skipped a beat, but his imperial dignity wouldn't allow him to back down. He gritted his teeth, steeled his resolve, and following the "theoretical steps" in his mind, he used one hand to lift the "little dumpling" off the bed and the other to support the head and neck!
The entire process was devoid of any curves or gentleness, much like moving a precious but fragile piece of porcelain off an assembly line.
The little "dumpling" was clearly bewildered by this sudden and uncomfortable "departure." He froze in mid-air for a moment, then felt the stiff arms and strange posture. His small body couldn't stretch out at all; his little neck was lifted too high, and his little bottom was being tossed around unsteadily. He felt like he was being held on a strange instrument of torture, extremely uncomfortable.
He started to shift and twist, trying to find a comfortable position.
However, each twist of his body made Xiao Che more nervous, and his arms became even stiffer.
"Don't move!" Xiao Che even subconsciously whispered, then realized it was inappropriate and quickly softened his voice, saying in a coaxing tone, "Good boy... my crown prince, lie down."
However, the baby couldn't understand any of this. The discomfort grew stronger, and the little dumpling's face began to scrunch up, its mouth pouting.
"Waaah..."
A plaintive sob, with its own prelude, sounded the alarm for disaster.
Xiao Che's mind went completely blank for a moment.
Immediately afterwards, as if to accuse this unfit father, a heart-wrenching cry, "Wah—", resounded throughout the entire Kunning Palace!
The little "dumpling" opened its throat and cried with all its might, its face turning red and its limbs kicking wildly in the air, as if it were protesting that it had suffered a great injustice.
Xiao Che was completely petrified.
He remained frozen in that stiff, strange posture, holding a wailing "alarm" in his arms, completely absorbed in an unprecedented state of dazedness and panic.
What should I do? Why is he crying? Did I hurt him? Is my posture wrong? What should I do next? What did the book say again?
His mind was a complete mess; all his theoretical knowledge vanished in that instant. The confident doctoral cap emoji above his head had disappeared, replaced by a huge, gray, cracked capital letter, accompanied by a cold system notification sound—【Failure.gif】.
In the end, a soft laugh broke the disastrous scene.
Lin Wanwan stood up with a smile and took the poor little boy who was crying so hard from Xiao Che's arms, who had completely shut down.
She didn't even use the standard "horizontal hug" method; she simply lifted him up gently, letting his soft little face rest against her shoulder, one hand gently supporting his back, and the other hand rhythmically patting his little bottom.
"Okay, okay, don't cry. Daddy didn't mean it. Daddy was just too nervous..." she coaxed softly, her voice full of laughter and affection.
Miraculously, the earth-shattering cries subsided almost instantly, turning into pitiful sobs. Under the warm, familiar embrace and gentle comfort of its mother, the little "dumpling" quickly calmed down and even let out a small hiccup.
The whole world is finally peaceful.
Xiao Che stood there, watching this scene with his hands empty, his expression still somewhat blank.
He looked at Lin Wanwan's relaxed and carefree demeanor, then at his son who had instantly become obedient in her arms, and then recalled his own devastating defeat, which was comparable to a battle...
At this moment, for the first time, this invincible and shrewd emperor of Liang had a deep and unwavering doubt about his abilities as a man, a husband, and a father.
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