Chapter 56

When Lu Bai returned from his phone call, everyone in the class was seated. He stood at the door and looked around, finally spotting Zhang Xiaotian in a corner. Zhang Xiaotian was surrounded by people, but he seemed to be detached from the scene, his head lowered, seemingly unsettled.

Lu Bai didn't rush to find a seat, but stood at the door and watched for a while.

Perhaps his mood had changed. Now when he looked at Zhang Xiaotian again, Lu Bai had a brand new feeling. This feeling was more clear-headed and stressful than when he was in high school, but less confused and aggrieved than before.

Are liking and liking the same thing? Lu Bai suddenly thought.

So Zhang Xiaotian once looked at me like this?

"Lu Bai, what are you doing standing there? Have you changed your career to become a model?"

Lu Bai looked in the direction of the sound.

"Why are there no seats? Come, come, sit here..." Seeing him standing there, the squad leader hurried to make room for him.

"No need, squad leader, I'll sit..."

Lu Bai wanted to say that he would sit next to Zhang Xiaotian, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Zhang Xiaotian glance at him and then hide towards the wall.

"What's the matter?" The squad leader was still waiting for him to speak.

"...fine."

Lu Bai looked at it for a while, then walked back to the squad leader: "Sit here, right? Thank you, squad leader."

The back-to-back exams had nearly paralyzed everyone's nerves, but now they were finally able to breathe a sigh of relief. Even those who weren't familiar with each other could now chat with each other more enthusiastically. Seeing that everyone had almost finished eating, a student who wasn't satisfied suggested playing a game together.

Taking the venue and the students' wishes into consideration, the class monitor decided to select one person from each table first, and then a few people who signed up on their own, for a total of eight people to play musical chairs.

"I will definitely play in the first round! You guys should be more enthusiastic too!" the squad leader called out.

The students below began to select people enthusiastically, and soon several people stood next to the class monitor.

"Who will sit at our table?" The two girls next to them lowered their heads and discussed.

Zhang Xiaotian didn't care. He was only thinking about when he could leave. If the timing hadn't been wrong, he would have left before the food was served. When someone suggested using the lottery app to select the winner, he immediately put his phone in his pocket.

"I don't want to play, you guys play." Zhang Xiaotian said.

Ignoring the momentary awkward silence at the table, Zhang Xiaotian stood up and left the table, intending to take advantage of the chaos to leave. However, he was discovered before his hand even touched the door.

"Zhang Xiaotian, what are you doing?" the squad leader shouted at him, "Help me get the food ready when you come back!"

Hearing the voice, Lu Bai also looked at Zhang Xiaotian.

"...I'll just make a call and go." Zhang Xiaotian said helplessly, then pushed the door and went out.

After going out, Zhang Xiaotian didn't walk far, but just sat down on a chair downstairs.

He pulled out his phone, turned it on, and stared at it in a trance. There was no call. Who would contact him in broad daylight when nothing happened? Zhang Xiaotian put the phone back into his pocket and squeezed his eyes shut.

Just before he went out, he had a brief eye contact with Lu Bai.

This was the first time the two had looked at each other in the past few days. Just one glance reminded Zhang Xiaotian of many things in the past.

In Zhang Xiaotian's impression, Lu Bai was a person who was always consistent. He smiled when happy and scolded when angry. No matter what emotion he was in, he would immediately express it. It was precisely because of this consistency that if one wanted to understand any of his emotions, they could find the answer in those bright black eyes.

But that glance just now was different. Besides the familiar burning warmth, it seemed to be mixed with something incomprehensible. Zhang Xiaotian couldn't find anything similar in his memory.

The phone vibrated, it was a reminder of the automatic payment of electricity bill.

His mother passed away on the night he took the college entrance examination, leaving behind nothing except a large sum of money and the house he lived in when he was in No. 4 Middle School. It was as if she intended to use the money to pay off her remaining guilt and debt in one go, and from then on, she no longer had a son like Zhang Xiaotian.

After seeing this message, Zhang Xiaotian remembered how his mother looked when she left at the airport that day.

"To be honest, I really don't understand you."

Mother Zhang was still the same efficient, almost aloof voice as when they first met. "But there's no point in saying this now. Since you've given up a bright future, I respect you. I hope you won't regret your choice today."

After saying this, she left and never contacted Zhang Xiaotian again. Zhang Xiaotian gladly accepted this arrangement and didn't think he would regret his decision. However, he didn't expect that the house that held so many memories and that he thought he would never return to would actually become a place close to home for him.

It had been a long time since he'd been home. Zhang Xiaotian looked up at the ceiling and closed his eyes tiredly.

The group quickly gathered, eight people surrounding the seven benches on the field, slowly circling in the most dazzling ethnic style.

Lu Bai was very annoyed because he was forcibly brought here.

He had no mood to play games right now. When he saw Zhang Xiaotian leave just now, he felt like his heart had flown away with him, leaving only his body instinctively staying here. There were always people coming in and out of the room, and every time the door rang, he would always look up to see if it was Zhang Xiaotian coming back.

"Now you're really thinking about me," Zhou Bin, who was standing behind him, muttered softly, "A few days ago, you were acting like you didn't want to talk to me anymore."

Lu Bai turned around and glared at him.

"Hey, I saw you were making a phone call at the door just now." Zhou Bin kicked with his toes. "What's going on? Did you find that person? Did you ask him clearly?"

"Don't you think you can't accept it? Why are you still so curious?" Lu Bai asked him.

"Hey! Can you be nicer to me? I'm not your love rival!" Seeing that Lu Bai didn't respond, Zhou Bin muttered angrily, "You weren't like this when we first started school..."

Lu Bai didn't say anything.

He knew that he was a little anxious now because he learned the truth too late and because his relationship with Zhang Xiaotian was not clear at the moment.

The music stopped and both of them grabbed the stools.

After the onlookers laughed for a while, the game continued. This time Zhou Bin was walking in front. As he was walking, he heard Lu Bai calling him from behind.

"I wasn't being mean to you... Sorry." Lu Bai said, "Also, thank you and Xu Yan."

Zhou Bin was tense for a while, then sighed when he saw his droopy look.

"Okay, just make up quickly. Otherwise, when winter comes and our dormitory doesn't have enough heating, it will all be your fault."

Lu Bai smiled weakly.

Loud music mingled with laughter. Before him stood a stool and the heels of the person in front of him. The mindless, repetitive pace of walking seemed to clear his mind of unnecessary thoughts. Players in the game didn't need to think too much; they simply ran towards the nearest target when the music stopped. The atmosphere was initially tense, but gradually, Lu Bai felt himself calming down in this repetitive trajectory. A thought gradually became clear in his mind.

Now, he knew the whole story. Thinking about how Zhang Xiaotian might have suffered so much because of him, Lu Bai felt a fire burning in his chest, urging him to do something immediately. But Zhang Xiaotian wouldn't even look at him.

This can't go on any longer. He must do something, at least apologize to Zhang Xiaotian first.

After thinking this through, Lu Bai felt a little more confident.

The music started and stopped. After a few rounds, only Lu Bai, a man and a woman were left on the stage. After Zhou Bin, the class monitor was also eliminated. Now he was smiling in the audience with a red face, as if he was drunk.

"Lu Bai, try your best!" He stretched his neck and yelled at Lu Bai, "You're the only one left at our table!"

Lu Bai waved his hand.

"Are you ready?" the classmate who was playing music shouted and clicked the screen.

The music started again, this time it was popular pop music. Students who could sing began to hum along. Gradually, more and more people joined in the singing. Even the girl in front of Lu Bai was humming along quietly, tapping her feet to the beat of the drum.

As if infected, Lu Bai also hummed.

In a trance, Lu Bai seemed to hear the sound of a door opening and closing again. He subconsciously looked up, and the music suddenly stopped. Everyone was sitting on the stools, and he was the only one standing there alone. He stared at Zhang Xiaotian in a daze, and heard the laughter around him and the deafening sound of his heartbeat.

"Lu Bai! What are you staring at?" the squad leader shouted behind him, laughing, "We've all lost!"

Lu Bai could hardly take his eyes off Zhang Xiaotian. He watched him return to his seat without even looking back, a wave of inexplicable emotions enveloping him.

He felt that he had already lost.

After one round was over, the squad leader stood up and started selecting players again.

There were more girls coming up this time, so the class monitor wanted to call a few more boys up.

"Be more proactive, don't be shy!" He put his hands on his hips, "Don't make me draw the student number!"

After calling for a long time, there was still one person missing, and some of the students present were getting a little anxious. Zhang Ting stood behind the class monitor and looked around. Suddenly, she saw Zhang Xiaotian playing with his phone in the corner. Coincidentally, Zhang Xiaotian also looked up and made eye contact with her.

"Xiaotian, would you like to play a game?" Zhang Ting asked him with a smile.

"I just won't..."

"Who's coming? Zhang Xiaotian? Come quickly!"

Just as Zhang Xiaotian was about to refuse, he was pushed forward by his classmates. The class monitor was also happy to push Zhang Xiaotian into the team.

"Alright, alright, everyone's here!" Seeing everyone gathered, the squad leader was afraid that someone would run away, so he quickly clapped his hands twice, "Then let's get started. Who, please play the music..."

Before he could finish his words, Lu Bai stood up and dragged a stool over to him.

"Squad leader, let me have another go!" Lu Bai said with a smile, "I want to avenge my previous shame."

"That's all right," the squad leader said, a little puzzled, "but why didn't you come when we were short of people just now?"

Before Zhang Xiaotian could hide, he saw Lu Bai coming and quickly said to the squad leader, "Squad leader, he's here, so I'll go down..."

"Can we start now?"

The classmate who was playing music over there saw that the student here had not stood properly for a long time, so he asked.

"Sure, sure!" The squad leader quickly walked out of the team, turned around and said to Zhang Xiaotian, "Hey, Xiaotian, just go ahead and play. You're staying here anyway!"

At this time, the music started, and Zhang Xiaotian had no choice but to follow the team.

Looking at the heels of the person in front of him, Zhang Xiaotian followed the group step by step. Whether it was because Lu Bai was too close, or because he was too sensitive, Zhang Xiaotian seemed to be able to hear Lu Bai's breathing behind him. The sound was not heavy, but it was obvious, echoing the uncontrollable heartbeat, tirelessly beating on his eardrums. Zhang Xiaotian wanted to turn around and ask Lu Bai to stay away from him, but he didn't want Lu Bai to know how much he cared, so he walked faster and faster, almost sticking to the back of the person in front of him.

"stop!"

The music stopped abruptly, and everyone immediately stopped and rushed to grab a stool. Zhang Xiaotian was too close to the person in front of him, and was caught off guard and was knocked backwards by that person. It was Lu Bai who came over and pulled him up, and pulled him directly onto the stool.

"You're cheating!" Zhang Ting was about to grab the stool, but she watched Lu Bai push Zhang Xiaotian onto it and laughed, "You two, why did you bring help?"

"I didn't say no!" Lu Bai sat there, smiling provocatively, one hand still on Zhang Xiaotian. Zhang Xiaotian felt a little awkward. He was about to give the stool to Zhang Ting, but Lu Bai held him down and wouldn't let him get up. He wanted to call Zhang Ting back, but when he turned around, Zhang Ting had already walked back to the audience.

"Why are you pulling me?"

Zhang Xiaotian looked at Lu Bai angrily. "I didn't want to play anyway."

"If I hadn't pulled you, you would have been knocked down just now." Lu Bai looked innocent.

There's no need to drag him onto the stool!

Zhang Xiaotian frowned and glared at Lu Bai.

The game continued soon, and this time Lu Bai was still following behind Zhang Xiaotian.

This time, Zhang Xiaotian didn't dare to get too close to the person in front of him, but he still tried his best to avoid Lu Bai. However, the space in front and behind was not big, and there was no place to hide. After taking a few steps, Zhang Xiaotian felt that he was sweating with anxiety.

Lu Bai fell behind Zhang Xiaotian, not too far away. Seeing him racking his brains, he wanted to laugh, but also felt a little bitter. He couldn't help but reach out and grab Zhang Xiaotian's clothes, pulling him back.

"Don't get so close," he said. "Be careful you don't bump into me again."

Zhang Xiaotian turned around and glanced at Lu Bai gently.

"Weren't you hiding from me? Why aren't you hiding now?"

"I won't hide anymore." Lu Bai lowered his head, "I..."

"You'd better stay hidden."

Zhang Xiaotian didn't want to talk to Lu Bai at all. Whenever he saw Lu Bai, he would remember the ridiculous things he did that night and how he ran away the next day. As long as Lu Bai got close to him, he couldn't help but get angry with Lu Bai.

"I don't understand why you can still approach me calmly." He tried his best to calm himself down and whispered to Lu Bai, "Now you know how I feel about you. Aren't you afraid that I will do something to you again?"

"I'm not afraid." Lu Bai defended himself, "Tian'er, I was drunk that night, but I knew what I was doing. I said I liked..."

Before he finished speaking, Zhang Xiaotian turned around in fright, and Lu Bai quickly shut up.

"I meant what I said." Looking at Zhang Xiaotian's shocked and angry eyes, Lu Bai explained, "You must believe me."

You want me to believe you? How do you want me to believe you?

Zhang Xiaotian's eyes almost turned red just hearing these words. It was Lu Bai who spoke for him back then, it was Lu Bai who took care of him when he was injured, it was Lu Bai who brought him home. Lu Bai had done so much for him, but he had done less than one ten-thousandth of that for Lu Bai. What was there for Lu Bai to like about someone like him?

"You don't have to say those nice things to me, Lu Bai." Zhang Xiaotian tried his best to keep his voice from trembling. "Maybe it's because you've never been rejected by a friend before, so I'm not used to it now. If you want, you can have many people around you. You don't have to have someone like me who has bad intentions towards you."

"friend?"

To Zhang Xiaotian's surprise, Lu Bai kept harping on the word. "We've slept together before, and you still consider yourself my friend?"

"Do you have to be so loud? Everyone can hear us!" Zhang Xiaotian was furious. "Why don't you just stand on the table and shout!"

"What's wrong with hearing it? Let them hear it!" Lu Bai said indifferently, "I don't care."

"you!"

Zhang Xiaotian took a deep breath.

"Lu Bai, do you really understand what that means? It's not a trivial matter like changing your taste in food, nor is it something you can get used to by just enduring it. Stay away from me, live the life you should live, and stop torturing me and making me feel guilty, okay?"

"What do you mean by the life I should live?" Lu Bai asked back, "When did you decide the life I should live?!"

"Be obedient and calm down!"

"Why do I have to leave you?!"

"Lu Bai!"

The music stopped again, and before Zhang Xiaotian could react, Lu Bai dragged him towards the stools. In the blink of an eye, several people rushed to the stools. Seeing that it was impossible to grab two stools at once, Lu Bai exerted force on his hands, trying to push Zhang Xiaotian up directly, but Zhang Xiaotian, who was usually weak, suddenly shook him off! Lu Bai looked back in shock, and before he could turn his head, Zhang Xiaotian pushed him onto the stool.

"Zhang Xiaotian is eliminated!"

Zhou Bin whistled loudly twice from below: "How righteous, Xiao Tianer!"

Zhang Xiaotian looked at Lu Bai who was still sitting on the stool and had not yet recovered from his daze. He turned around and walked downstairs. After taking two steps, Lu Bai caught up with him and grabbed his arm.

Zhang Xiaotian let him hold him and said, "I don't want to argue with you anymore."

"Don't argue, let's not argue. I was wrong, Tian'er." Although he didn't run away, Lu Bai was slightly out of breath. "Don't say anything about leaving me. Give me another chance."

Zhang Xiaotian looked at him.

"I want to talk to you sometime."