Chapter 68. [Revised] As long as she still cares about him, he...
Seeing Wen Xue's face turn pale in an instant, He Yan knew that she had misunderstood him. He did not rush to explain, but instead, as if lost in the past, he said slowly, "I remember, not long after his burial, Xida University was about to start, and I was the one who brought you here."
Wen Xue loosened her grip on the steering wheel, her fingers curled slightly, and she lowered her head, making it impossible to see the expression in her eyes.
“You initially told me not to see you off, saying there was a direct bus from the high-speed rail station to the school, but I still did. After dropping you off at your dorm, I gave you a business card and told you to contact me if you needed anything.” He looked at her with a dark gaze she couldn’t understand at all. “I never received a call from you, and I always thought you were doing well.”
That's what He Yan thought in his previous life.
Since the girl named Wen Xue hadn't contacted him, she must be doing well, so there was no need for him to bother her.
After all, he is He Heng's older brother.
She would never know how much he regretted it. In both his lives, very few people helped him, and many others received his help, yet he never even helped the only girl his brother had ever loved in this world.
Wen Xue could hear the regret and suppressed pain in his words.
She bit her lip and whispered, "I don't want to trouble you."
She wanted to tell him that although she had never called him, she had kept the business card he gave her, but the words remained unspoken.
"So you know what I regret?" Before his rebirth, and for a long time after his rebirth, he would always dream of her, dream of the tear she shed at the charity gala. No matter how his feelings for her changed, he would never forget his original intention.
His original intention was simply to hope that she could live a peaceful, tranquil, and happy life.
Don't let yourself be like you were in your past life, unable to control your own destiny.
“I’ve already regretted it once,” he said. “I won’t regret it a second time, so forget about it. I can’t agree to what you’re saying.”
"I'm doing very well now, and things won't be like—"
"Wenxue!" He could no longer contain himself and interrupted her sternly, "I can agree to anything else, except this."
Wen Xue remained silent.
She really wanted to ask him, "If she doesn't leave, what are we going to do?"
They are impossible. In this world, she can be with anyone but him.
He must know why he's still so stubborn.
The two sat quietly in the car for a long time. It was He Yan who moved his stiff body, looked at her for a moment, leaned over and turned off the engine for her. As he leaned back in his seat, his gaze swept over the safety pendant, and he softened his tone: "It's late, let's get out of the car."
Wen Xue hummed in agreement, unbuckled the seatbelt that had been binding her and preventing her from moving, and opened the car door.
It was past midnight, and the cold wind outside felt like a dull knife scraping against my face.
The entire building was shrouded in darkness. He followed her up to the third floor and, as usual, escorted her to the door.
He gazed at her, who seemed still dazed and lost in thought. He instructed her, "Take a hot bath and get some sleep. They've all gone back to their hometown. I'm downstairs. Call me if you need anything."
Wen Xue nodded gently.
After watching his figure disappear into the corridor, she turned and went into the house, sat down on the sofa, and after a while, took a towel and a change of clothes, dragged her heavy steps to the bathroom. Even though her brain was trying hard to push away those two kisses, the slight stinging sensation on her lips while brushing her teeth reminded her of what had happened.
She looked up at herself in the mirror, her eyes slightly red, and her smile looked worse than a cry.
Meanwhile, He Yan sat like a statue on the stairs between the second and third floors. In the quiet night, the intermittent sound of water from the bathroom could be faintly heard. With a click, the lighter cap popped open, and a small flame flickered, illuminating his face.
-
As dawn broke, Wen Xue finally succumbed to exhaustion and fell into a deep sleep. Even in her sleep, she seemed restless, perhaps because of her guilt. Much later, she dreamt of her past with He Heng.
They secretly strolled on the playground behind the teacher's back. Facing the sunset, he walked backwards while looking at her and smiling.
The night after the college entrance exam, they didn't want to go to karaoke; they just wanted to be alone. The two of them, like idiots, took a bus that traveled almost across half the city, hiding from the rain and laughing like fools at the bus stop.
…
Finally, the scene changes.
Suddenly, another person appeared in my sweet dream.
He Heng smiled and introduced her, "This is my brother, I've mentioned him to you before."
She looked at the tall man in front of her with some shyness. For some reason, she wanted to call him "brother" along with He Heng, but the moment she opened her mouth, she changed her address to "He Yan".
She smiled and called out again and again, "He Yan, He Yan."
No, that's not right, it's not like that—
She suddenly opened her eyes. The soft quilt felt so heavy that it made it hard for her to breathe. She sat up, clutching the quilt, sweat beading on her nose—from fright and from the heat. Once she calmed down, she reached for her phone on the bedside table, turned on the screen, and realized it was almost 1 p.m.
My phone has received a lot of new messages.
Scanning through them one by one, almost all were New Year's greetings, but He Yan's message stood out: [Image] Which bottle to drink?
The photo shows what appears to be a supermarket beverage shelf, brightly colored and taking up an entire wall.
Did he go to the supermarket?
She glanced at the message; it was sent two hours earlier. After a couple of seconds of contemplation, she replied: "Anything is fine."
He Yan replied quickly: [Awake? I'm in the kitchen.]
Wen Xue put down her phone, got out of bed, changed her clothes and washed up. She had only taken a few steps after opening the door when she smelled a fragrance wafting in the air. She paused for a few seconds, then slowly walked over.
The man in the kitchen had his back to her, his phone on speakerphone, and his hands were busy processing yam sticks. "When should we add the corn and yams?"
The other end of the phone was noisy, but Wan Nian's voice came through: "The soup needs to be simmered over low heat. Add corn and yam at the end, and simmer for another ten or twenty minutes. By the way, Brother Yan, you must wear disposable gloves when you are handling the yam, otherwise it will be very itchy!"
He Yan's shoulder twitched, and his hands stopped moving. "...What?"
Why didn't you say so sooner?
A faint smile appeared on Wen Xue's lips.
She went inside, tiptoed, and found the disposable gloves in the cabinet with practiced ease. She came to his side and said, "I'll cut them."
The sudden female voice instantly attracted the attention of the young couple on the other end of the phone. Nana couldn't hear clearly, so she called out, "Brother Yan, you're not spending the New Year alone! Who is it? Who is it?!"
In fact, Nana and Wannian did not immediately think of Wen Xue because they had heard before the New Year that she had returned to Haicheng as soon as winter vacation started.
He Yan ignored Nana's babbling and whispered to Wen Xue, "No need, I'll do it. Are you hungry? There are steamed dumplings in the pot, freshly bought."
"fine."
She bent down and smiled at Nana and Wannian, saying, "It's me. Happy New Year! Did you have a good time traveling?"
He Yan glanced at her subtly.
She acted as usual.
However, he shouldn't be too surprised, as she had been deceiving him in this way for the past two weeks.
Nana exclaimed, "Wen Xue, it really is you! Xun, I knew it! Yan-ge would never be this gentle to anyone but you!"
These words were spoken.
Wen Xue looked up and met He Yan's gaze. "Aren't your hands itching?"
"I don't feel anything."
"Then you should still wear gloves."
He Yan nodded, his hands covered in yam sap. He casually turned on the tap to wash them. Just as he was about to take the gloves, she stepped aside, probably worried that his hands were wet and it would be inconvenient for him. She put the gloves on for him.
"Wenxue, didn't you go back to your hometown?" Nana asked loudly again.
He Yan lowered his eyes and remained motionless, letting her put gloves on him.
"Something came up unexpectedly, so I took a car to Xicheng." Wen Xue had just finished washing up, and a few strands of her hair were wet and hanging down beside her cheeks.
"Hahahaha!" Nana laughed, "I knew it! You definitely wouldn't want Yan-ge to spend the New Year alone, right?"
Wen Xue paused slightly, then responded softly.
After putting on her gloves, she turned around hurriedly, not even having time to say goodbye to Nana on the phone, and walked out of the kitchen.
He Yan stared silently at the doorway.
The phone was still buzzing, but he ignored it and continued cutting the yam into small pieces. Still feeling agitated, he threw the knife onto the cutting board after finishing the yam, startling Nana and Wannian, who asked repeatedly, "What happened? What happened!"
"Nothing much." He Yan's tone was heavy, and somewhat impatient. "I'll hang up if there's nothing else."
"Where's Wenxue?" Nana asked.
"have no idea."
As he spoke, he pulled off his gloves and ended the call. As if sensing something, he turned around and met Wen Xue's clear eyes.
He paused, taken aback.
Didn't she go back to her room?
His frustration stemmed from her drastic change in attitude. He simply couldn't take it anymore.
Leaving is leaving, and losing is losing; they are not the same thing at all.
What is loss? It's that in the past, she would care if he got a small blister on his hand, and she would angrily snatch the dishcloth from his hand if he wanted to wash the dishes. At that time, he only felt a headache. Now, thinking about it, he may never get her care and concern again.
Wen Xue held a hairdryer in her hand, her gaze lowered. "Rinse it several times, then blow-dry it for a few minutes... that will stop the itching."
He Yan was stunned for a moment, his throat tightening. "You went to get the hair dryer?"
"Um."
He had just put the phone on speakerphone, and on the other end were Nana and Wannian. She didn't want to argue with him, afraid that others would discover that something was wrong between them. She planned to keep what happened last night a secret and guard it tightly, not wanting a third person to know.
He Yan's bad mood was easily soothed by her simple "hmm".
He was completely out of breath.
As long as she still cares about him, he hasn't lost her.
"Aren't your hands itchy?" she asked again.
He Yan, with his thick skin, felt nothing at all. He didn't care whether it itched or not, and simply nodded, "It's a little itchy."
"Don't grab it," she warned.
"good."
They all seemed to be maintaining a peaceful state of mind.
He Yan was like a robot; whatever she said went. When she told him to rinse, he obediently washed his hands again and again.
Wen Xue plugged in the power cord, gestured for him to hold out his hand, and turned on the switch. The warm, almost scalding air blew on his hand. She asked, "Is it hot?"
"fine."
She looked down at his dry hands. The blisters from last year's New Year hadn't left any burn marks thanks to her daily reminders to apply medicine. However, an old scar on his hand remained stubbornly there. She didn't know what he had been through in the past. When she occasionally asked, he was vague and would avoid talking about it if possible.
Not only his hands, but also his left shoulder was injured.
She could not ignore the pain in her heart.
…
After confirming that He Yan's hands weren't itching, Wen Xue leisurely picked up a few steamed dumplings from the pot to fill her stomach, only to find that she had no use for them.
Although it was just the two of them celebrating the New Year, He Yan still tried his best to make the New Year's Eve dinner more sumptuous. He stewed a pot of yam and pork rib soup himself and asked a friend to order a box of seafood. Seafood is easy to prepare, and Wen Xue loves to eat it. She likes it whether it is blanched or steamed.
He Yan also wanted to find something for her to do. After wandering around for a while, he found a couplet that the supermarket had given away in his shopping bag and gave it to her. "Just one pair. You can put it on your door for good luck."
Wen Xue accepted it.
Even though there was only one, she asked Nana on her phone with great interest: "How did you make that paste from last year?"
Nana replied instantly, attaching the steps, and then quietly asked her: "Did you and Yan Ge have a fight? He's acting like he's on steroids [angry]."
Wen Xue glanced at He Yan, who was processing swimming crabs with his back to her.
She could sense that he had been at a loss and suppressing his emotions since last night.
It turned out he didn't know what to do either.
She couldn't forget the smile he gave her before he kissed her yesterday.
At the time, it felt like a glare to her eyes; now, looking back, she sees a hint of despair in his smile.
She looked away and replied to the message: 【No, it's probably because I slept too late today. He was busy preparing the New Year's Eve dinner by himself. Don't be angry [hug]】
Nana: [Remember to take pictures of our New Year's Eve dinner tonight and show them to me [hmph]]
Wen Xue chuckled softly, put away her phone, followed the steps to make a small bowl of paste, and then took a brush and couplets to get busy.
After she left the kitchen, He Yan continued washing and scrubbing. Suddenly, she realized that it might not be safe for her to put up the couplets. Last year, she was with Nana, so at least someone could help. This year, she was standing on the stool by herself. What if she accidentally fell?
Thinking of this, he didn't bother to deal with the seafood. He frowned and chased after her, glancing at the far right corner, but was taken aback when he didn't see her.
His expression was solemn. He knew rationally that she wouldn't leave without saying goodbye, but he still felt flustered for a few seconds. Just as he was about to stride to her room and knock on the door, a thought flashed through his mind. He stopped and turned around to go downstairs.
On the second-floor corridor.
He Yan gazed calmly at the graceful figure.
She stood on the chair, meticulously pasting the couplets.
She would rather give him all the care and blessings than keep them for herself.
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