Obsession
Gu Sidu never imagined he would one day part ways with the Bodhisattva. He frequently woke up from nightmares. He went to Jiang Yufan's courtyard, but found only silence. Jiang Yufan had already left. Without Gu Sidu's knowledge, Jiang Yufan had taken nothing with her—the gold hairpin Gu Sidu had given her, the sandalwood Gu Sidu had given her, the prayer beads Gu Sidu had given her.
Those scriptures are still in the same corner, never even opened.
Not taking these things away means not taking away worldly thoughts. Jiang Yufan never had Gu Sidu in her heart, which is why she could be so ruthless and heartless, leaving Gu Sidu alone to guard this courtyard that felt like a dream.
The officials implicated in this incident have already been reassigned to their respective posts. The Emperor's brilliance lay in using this incident as a warning, demoting a number of people but keeping them all in the capital; none of them had actually been transferred. Jiang Yaoguang was demoted three ranks, while Gu Sidu remained in the Hanlin Academy, doing his miscellaneous tasks.
Everyone appeared to be seriously injured, yet everyone seemed to be at peace. The only change was that people in the court no longer dared to openly accept bribes; they became much more restrained, and no one dared to act recklessly. Everyone remained cautious and dutiful in their positions.
Besides Jiang Yufan, the Emperor also achieved his wish.
These fussy calculations exist only in the human world and will not enter the Agarwood Temple.
The Chenxiang Temple is quiet and peaceful, with a unique sense of a secluded paradise. However, in such a paradise, one should not discuss money.
However, one hundred taels was not a small amount, and Chenxiang Temple could not afford it.
When Daoyun entered the room, she was furious. As soon as she entered, she sat down on a chair and took a big gulp of tea, slamming her hand on the table to vent her anger.
"What's wrong?" Jiang Yufan opened her eyes while sitting in meditation. At Chenxiang Temple, Jiang Yufan only had a cold expression, as if she didn't care about anything and could accept everything.
“Buddha, how could they be like this? They’ve spent all one hundred taels and don’t want to spend any more money. If it weren’t for you, how could Chenxiang Temple have such a thriving incense offering all these years? They’ve truly forgotten their roots!”
They've been living a good life thanks to Jiang Yufan, but now that she's back, they feel she's trying to take their money away. They say this fake Bodhisattva is here to bring them bad luck, and she's really playing the role of a real Bodhisattva.
Who does she think she is? If it weren't for the Chenxiang Temple taking her in, he would have nowhere to go.
Jiang Yufan had heard these words many times. She curled her lips and said, "I've heard these words many times over the years, so why are you still so angry?"
"Shouldn't you have gotten used to it by now?"
“Buddha, you don’t know, we haven’t heard these words in a long time. When we left Chenxiang Temple and stayed at the Gu residence, we never suffered such grievances. We lived such good lives. Now, thinking back, we still miss it a little.”
After Daoyun finished speaking, she looked at Jiang Yufan, who belatedly realized that she had said the wrong thing. She shouldn't have mentioned Gu Sidu or the Gu family.
"Buddha, I'm sorry..."
"It's alright. What's there to be afraid of when Gu Sidu is mentioned? I don't have any deep-seated hatred for him." Jiang Yufan shook her head. When did Daoyun become so reserved?
Jiang Yufan said to Daoyun, "Take out one hundred taels from my box."
"No," Daoyun directly refused Jiang Yufan. "Buddha, you're too easygoing. Gu Sidu's hundred taels didn't even reach your hands. Why are you using your own money to subsidize Gu Sidu?"
“We didn’t take anything. We don’t owe Gu Sidu anything. It’s Chenxiang Temple that owes Gu Sidu something.”
If it weren't for the people from Chenxiang Temple being greedy for those hundred taels of silver, this ill-fated relationship wouldn't have come to Jiang Yufan. Now, it's even worse that Jiang Yufan has to pay for it. Why should she?
The Buddhist nun didn't offend anyone.
Jiang Yufan knew that if she returned to Chenxiang Temple, the people there would definitely not pay for her. She knew exactly what kind of people Chenxiang Temple were, but Gu Sidu's money was a different matter.
Money is just an external thing, and Jiang Yufan doesn't care about it. It's fine to give it to Gu Sidu.
She comforted Yun, saying, "We've been staying at the Gu family's house for a few months now, so just consider it as giving him what he needs. Go on your way."
These days, Gu Sidu has been waiting outside Chenxiang Temple to offer incense. Giving him one hundred taels of silver is a way to let him go back and not come to Chenxiang Temple again.
Dao Yun pursed her lips, reluctantly watching the hundred taels of silver approach her. She raised her head and looked at Jiang Yu Fan: "Are you sure you want to give it to me?"
"Go quickly," Jiang Yufan said to Daoyun.
The winter sun was cold, and dark clouds loomed overhead, threatening rain soon. The icy rain would wash over the stone steps, causing pain to the knees of those kneeling in meditation, making it impossible to kneel for long. Kneeling for an extended period would cause the cold, damp water to seep into every joint of the knee, tearing the person apart from the bone and slowly dragging their legs until they were too weak to stand upright.
It shouldn't be Gu Sidu who can't stand up straight.
But if Gu Sidu still doesn't get up, then every time it rains, the pain will sweep through Gu Sidu's body and linger there. Jiang Yufan didn't want to owe Gu Sidu a favor, so when Daoyun delivered the money, she secretly followed behind Daoyun, wanting to see if Gu Sidu could go back.
This ill-fated relationship should be ended.
-
The rain was icy cold, but it couldn't compare to the chill in Gu Sidu's heart.
He couldn't remember how many times he had come to Chenxiang Temple. He just wanted to see Jiang Yufan, but each time he failed to do so. When the monks of Chenxiang Temple saw him arrive, they put their hands in their pockets and pointed at Gu Sidu, whispering among themselves about what kind of tricks that fake bodhisattva had used to bewitch Gu Sidu like this.
"Could it be that the fake Bodhisattva has actually gained supernatural powers?"
"Impossible. Haven't you heard? This official was demoted before. How could he be so well-informed?"
"What else does he want?"
"That's strange, that's just how rich people are, we don't understand. Anyway, he comes every day, so our lives are a little easier. Isn't there a room in the backyard that needs repairs?"
Everyone smiled without saying a word and quietly left.
Gu Sidu heard these words, but he was only concerned about the unrepaired house in the backyard. Was that house where the Bodhisattva lived? He would have to come back a few more times to find out.
The icy pain was excruciating. Gu Sidu quietly moved his leg and found that he had no feeling in his knee. He tried to get up but fell heavily to the ground.
He had been kneeling for two hours. Compared to the sweltering summer heat, he still felt that this kind of weather was better. At least he wouldn't faint. His sincerity in suffering from heatstroke had led him to invite Jiang Yufan, and he believed that the same would happen this time.
In recent days, the abbot had asked him why he had such an obsession, why he wouldn't let go of Jiang Yufan. Gu Sidu didn't give an answer; he didn't know how to answer. He simply followed his heart; he wanted Jiang Yufan to experience the suffering of this world with him.
He wanted to cultivate together with Jiang Yufan.
The abbot simply sighed.
“Why is the abbot sighing? It was you who said that even Bodhisattvas need to cultivate themselves, and that cultivating with me is also good for the Bodhisattva. Why can’t I make a request?”
The abbot's sigh stemmed from his observation of a tangled web of obsessions in the mortal realm. No one in this world can truly let go of such attachments; to do so would bring endless suffering and unresolved emotional entanglements.
Only by letting go can you be free.
The abbot smiled gently: "Yu Fan and you are the same kind of people. You both have obsessions. Isn't this a kind of fate?"
Once someone is fixated on something, they can't be persuaded otherwise. Eventually, the abbot stopped caring about Gu Sidu and simply ordered someone to secretly replace the cushion with a softer one so that Gu Sidu could kneel more comfortably.
This was the last thing the abbot could do for them, but even so, Gu Sidu still couldn't defy fate. He was still dizzy and about to fall when a voice called out "Lord Gu" pulled him back from his despondency.
Gu Sidu looked up and saw Dao Yun holding a tray, staring intently at him.
"Long time no see, Miss Daoyun." After saying this, Gu Sidu still fell heavily to the ground.
It was truly speechless. Dao Yun rolled her eyes and sighed. Every time she saw Gu Sidu, she always saw him in a disheveled state, always saw him faint. Dao Yun even began to suspect that he was trying to scam her.
If Gu Sidu hadn't fallen and fainted, and could walk properly, he might have been able to leave Chenxiang Temple with one hundred taels of silver. But now things are different. Now Daoyun has to find someone to help Gu Sidu up and check if he is still alive.
Gu Sidu was even able to enter the backyard because of this.
Dao Yun found it hard not to suspect that Gu Sidu was faking it, just to see the Buddha!
This was Gu Sidu's usual trick, but regardless of whether Gu Sidu was faking it or not, Daoyun still didn't send the money to Gu Sidu.
If you get injured in winter, the most important thing is to avoid the cold wind, which could reopen the wound and cause it to fester—that would be a terrible thing. Temples are not like wealthy homes; there are no such restrictions. They can only bandage the wound to the point where the person can barely stand.
When Gu Sidu was able to get out of bed and walk, Dao Yunzhong reappeared at the door, blocking the only light source in the room, and looked at Gu Sidu with a gloomy face.
"Lord Gu, are you alright?"
“Miss Daoyun,” Gu Sidu bowed unsteadily, “Where is the Bodhisattva? I wish to see the Bodhisattva.”
"How dare you say that?" Daoyun glared at Gu Sidu with annoyance. "The Buddhist nun is not feeling well, so it is inconvenient for you to see her. Here is one hundred taels of silver. Our Buddhist nun instructed that it must be delivered to you. Chenxiang Temple does not give this money. This is money that our Buddhist nun took out of her own pocket, specially for you. Please keep it safe and do not come to Chenxiang Temple again."
"Is the Bodhisattva unwell?" Gu Sidu seized on what he wanted to hear and became anxious. "I need to go see the Bodhisattva."
Dao Yun raised his sword, just a hair's breadth away from Gu Sidu's nose.
Gu Sidu stopped in his tracks. He looked down at the hundred taels on the table, and an idea came to him. He said to Daoyun, "I don't want these hundred taels."
"You don't want it?" Dao Yun frowned. "Then what do you want?"
"I want to go see the Bodhisattva!"
"Take it or leave it," Dao Yun said, sheathing his sword and taking the hundred taels of silver.
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