-1-
Perhaps it was because of yesterday's wild party, or perhaps it was because his boss had been avoiding him these past few days, but after a long-awaited vacation, Mr. P was not overwhelmed by the mountains of complaint reports when he returned to work.
...even though it took him half an hour to completely clear his desk from the complaint report - not "dealt with", just "cleared" - it came out.
However, considering the number of reports "Ms. M usually produced while he was on vacation," this was a very, very small number.
So much so that after the cleanup, Mr. P felt a subtle sense of panic and wanted to handle a few more reports.
...After realizing his typical M-animal thought of "wanting to handle a few more reports", he immediately went to wash his face with cold water.
-2-
Having a resentful boss can easily lead to falling into invisible PUA.
While washing his face, Mr. P took the opportunity to organize his thoughts and tried to analyze why his boss "didn't happily create a bunch of complaints while I was on vacation this time."
So he reflected on whether his behavior in the past few days had been too excessive and whether he had scared his boss like a cat with its fur frozen on its back.
-3-
——Yes, of course.
Mr. P did not accidentally ignore the accident a few days ago.
He did it on purpose, just to test her reaction.
After all, it is impossible for Mr. P to ignore any abnormality happening around Ms. M - his boss, of course, must have all his attention.
-4-
...What he found out really made him curious.
Miss M actually cares a lot.
She cared too much about what she saw that day in that world.
I had been hiding from him for so long that I had lost my rationality and vigilance, and was shaken by him several times, and was on the verge of being caught.
Mr. P did not think that his superficial attempts were very sophisticated. Compared with the countless secret attempts in the past, these attempts were too obvious and she would have noticed them if she had paid attention.
He also didn't think that Miss M was such an easy-to-deal-with silly beauty. His boss was the most dangerous and insane being he had ever seen. He alone formed the most terrifying food chain weighing on his head. He was more like an Amazon crocodile than a kitten.
-5-
Oh, but those big alligators with short arms and short feet that do those cute little paddling moves underwater when they swim.
"It can open its bloody mouth and bite half of the boat into pieces at any time" and "its claws and tail are cute underwater when swimming" are not contradictory, right?
-6-
…Besides, she's really beautiful. She looked a bit goofy when she didn't notice the yogurt mustache after lunch… In some ways, she really fits the description of a dorky beauty… Hmm… Why didn't I realize it before… If I put myself in that perspective…
Cough cough.
In fact, Mr. P was very sober.
He can think about "what a horrible lunatic M actually is" and "how cute and clumsy M is in my perspective" at the same time.
The objective and the subjective can be arranged together and evenly in his brain.
——Yes, Mr. P can always stay calm, and he can even distinguish the filters he has added to his boss.
After all, he is a strange guy who is calm enough to maintain an ambiguous relationship with his direct superior for fifty years, and he still recognizes the fact that "she just thinks I'm fun" even though she deliberately gets close to and teases him countless times.
-7-
It is obvious that what they do has gone beyond the relationship between superiors and subordinates, and it is obvious that the way they get along is similar to that of an old couple.
Although there is a "no kissing" rule, the boundary between the two people has long been very blurred. If you count Miss M's occasional smile of "The boss likes Xiao P the most", there is no need for confession.
It seems that all that’s missing is a wedding?
...Anyone would probably have such a vain thought.
After all, M is such a beautiful girl that when she acts cute and coquettish on purpose, any man will feel helpless and fall for her.
——I know you are pretending, but who can resist the sweet words “Please, I really don’t have the strength, come and help me”?
But Mr. P just managed to stay calm.
-8-
"No, Ms. M. If you, who can lift a 4,000-kilogram hammer, can't open this bottle cap, then I can't open it either. Go find a fruit knife and cut open this bottle of soda. After all, the bottle cap weighs over 4,000 kilograms."
Ms. M: “…”
So Miss M found a fruit knife, and holding the fruit knife, slowly approached his back.
Mr. P, who was busy preparing a lunch sandwich for her, said: "Oh, yes. Could you help me open this pickle jar? I can't open it. Please, Ms. M, you are the most powerful and reliable boss I know."
Ms. M: “…”
-9-
Miss M put down the fruit knife and unscrewed the pickle jar with a "click".
I felt extremely happy, just like those straight guys who were asked by their girlfriends to help unscrew bottle caps.
"Little P is so weak. He can't even open the jar. Little P is so weak. Tsk tsk."
"Thank you, you're amazing."
"Hmph! Anything else you want to twist?"
"Yes. The cap of this bottle of soda."
-10-
Well, Mr. P always clearly recognizes his own weakness and his boss's strength.
He will never be carried away by a few words of coquettishness, nor will he be shaken by a light-hearted "favorite".
No matter what he hears, no matter what he is invited to touch - he always calmly understands that "I am not in a romantic relationship with her", "I am just her subordinate", "I have not yet received from her what I really want".
If calmness is his basic character, then "gentleness" and "hypocrisy" seem to be just a deliberate coating to seduce his boss.
……seem.
Who knows.
-11-
To sum up, the calm Mr. P put aside all filters and had already realized the extremely high difficulty of conquering Miss M herself.
——If she was easy to deal with, he wouldn't have spent at least fifty years doing the preliminary preparations, and only now began to carefully and step by step close the net.
No matter from which angle one looked at his dear boss, he was incredibly powerful and invulnerable.
However, that man who seemed to be the president of the Eternal Life Society and had evil intentions towards his superiors...
The leader of the Eternal Life Society is familiar with the boss, and is also familiar with the past that my boss and I have shared?
-12-
After all, he thought he could trip me up with a wedding ring, so he stole the phone.
...It's nothing to underestimate him. He is indeed very weak. If he hadn't happened to remember the familiar ring hanging on his ear, he might have been fooled by the fake ring.
But, did he underestimate his superiors? Did he think that "M" would be locked in that world in the past?
Has this president never known about that existence, never seriously observed her?
"Miss M is the cutest in the world" and "Miss M is the most invincible in the world" can completely exist on the same level, right?
-13-
He could clearly see the problem, and Mr. P did not think that the president had made a mistake in judgment.
The guy who could make White Robe willingly serve as his subordinate, establish the Eternal Life Society, forcibly resurrect W, and lick the phone screen in front of him...
What's more, the slogan of the Eternal Life Society is [How to Kill the Banshee].
That president is not a fool, but he is undoubtedly a madman.
And the madman knew everything about his boss that he didn't know.
-14-
So, just like that guy gave a fake ring to divert his attention...
Since that guy thought he could use that space-time coordinate to trip up his boss in the past, it was tantamount to implying that "that past" had as much influence on his boss as a wedding ring.
From this, we can infer that:
A few days ago, that world with strange coordinates, that world located in the past time and space.
It is a "marriage" that the boss had in the past.
-15-
She couldn't put the weight of that marriage behind her.
…Otherwise, the boss wouldn’t have run away and dragged him away as soon as he arrived in this world.
And the other protagonist in that marriage?
Who was your boss’ ex-husband?
-16-
Mr. P turned on the faucet and looked up at himself in the mirror.
After staring for a second or two, he tilted his head and readjusted the angle of the earring.
My boss’s ex-husband was probably me before he died, right?
Otherwise, why has my boss been avoiding me these days?
-17-
...However, this guess is a bit risky. It is only based on the boss's abnormal reaction in the past few days and the earrings made of the ring.
In fact, the boss's abnormal behavior in the past few days can also be explained as "secretly wanting to prepare a surprise for me for the anniversary." The earrings made of the ring were badly worn, and the lowercase letter "m" on the inner circle was almost invisible, making it difficult to use as evidence.
Moreover, he had secretly tried it out when he discovered the vague "m" and put it on his sleeping boss to see if the size matched...
As it turned out, the ring didn't fit any of her fingers.
-18-
Therefore, none of Mr. P's speculations were supported by evidence.
He was an extremely calm person. If he couldn't find evidence, he wouldn't conclude that "I was my boss's ex-husband"—even if he felt that this guess was very close to the truth, and that his boss's unusual behavior over the past few days was definitely not just about preparing for the anniversary celebration—
In any case, the calm Mr. P will still make other assumptions and be mentally prepared for the corresponding assumptions.
For example, Miss M has an ex-husband with whom she has a deep affection.
For example, that ex-husband is not me.
-19-
Thinking of this, Mr. P paused and flicked the old ring that was hanging on his ear and was of the wrong size.
…If it’s not me, it doesn’t matter.
It’s just [ex-husband], what’s there to be wary of?
Just a loser who was lucky enough to have it but ended up leaving miserably.
Even if he was lucky enough to become an undead and enter the system world, he would not be able to become Miss M's subordinate. Miss M's subordinate is only me;
Even if he was lucky enough to get in front of Miss M and get some of her memories, it would be impossible for him to win Miss M's favor again, because...
Miss M has me by her side.
-20-
Mr. P looked in the mirror and lowered his fingers to adjust his earrings.
She loves the blue eyes, the earrings, the shape of her throat, and the bite on her cheek...
Regardless of whether it was true or false, she had said she liked him countless times and called him "little friend" countless times.
Um.
No matter how you look at it, she can definitely beat a hundred divorced old men.
-twenty one-
Mr. P nodded with great satisfaction at himself in the mirror and turned away.
...However, in order to ensure the chances of winning, we still need to find solid evidence of the boss's ex-husband's identity.
Anyway, there are not many complaint reports today, and today's maintenance tasks are relatively simple. Ms. W revealed that the next Eternal Life Association meeting will be held in a few days.
The president of the Eternal Life Society... the main system that accompanied the boss through the journey that day... Or, go directly to the deep warehouse of the Observation Department to look up the number of that world and see if you can retrieve the footage of Miss M entering and leaving there?
——Even if there is only a 1% chance of losing, he will eliminate this 1% chance.
-twenty two-
At the same time, in the central control room.
Miss M raised her arms and stood in front of the gap that had been opened: "Yo."
Main system: “…”
Ms. M: "As you and I discussed all day, my emotional issues are still not going away. I wanted to consult my colleagues this morning, but they're all idiots, so I came here."
-twenty three-
The main system recalled the painful experience of the previous day.
That entire day, she held it tightly with enough strength to suffocate it, grabbing its spherical body and pulling out data points one by one. Every time she pulled them out, she muttered to herself, "I am a good person" and "I am not a bad little P."
You are not a good person at all, and you treated Xiao P badly.
...Just face the reality and stop worrying about it!
The main system looked at the gap it had just repaired, which was then opened again, and said with grief: "Get out!"
Miss M kicked him and said, "Okay, get out of here."
The main system flew out of the central control room like a meteor: "..."
-twenty four-
Anyway, this piece of data garbage is useless and only knows how to condemn her.
You can’t consult a stupid colleague about emotional issues, you can’t find junk data to sort out, and you can’t go to Xiao P...
She really wanted to solve this annoying problem of having her heart beating fast in strange places whenever she saw Little P.
Miss M is a very direct person. She really wants to stick to her subordinates, act cute and wait for an opportunity to murder them, instead of having abnormal emotions after just looking at each other... Is it still possible for her to play well with her subordinates?
So, she didn't endure it for a few days and didn't try to escape.
On the first day after a hangover, after losing control twice in the passenger seat, I didn't even go to work and came here.
-25-
“…There’s nothing I can do. Although I really don’t want to go in there…”
But she had to address this maddening emotional anomaly immediately.
In less than twenty-four hours, she had dodged the gazes of her subordinates five times, tried to bite his lips eleven times, and was unable to concentrate on the maintenance tasks twenty-seven times and just wanted to escape to her bedroom and shut herself in.
...What a joke!
What a joke!
She, M, will never regret her abnormal behavior due to drunkenness, nor will she be autistic due to strange impulses. Her bedroom is a place for going crazy and making love. She is a big shot who will bite or grab whatever she wants, and she will never hesitate or be timid!
This weird emotional abnormality...must be eliminated before the end of get off work today!
-26-
Thinking of this, Miss M couldn't help but scratch her hair irritably, and quickly walked through the sea of data in the control room, casually condensing a huge black shadow sickle.
She swung her sickle, swiping and turning it towards the dazzling data points—as if manipulating a giant key in mid-air—
Deep in the control room, a door was suddenly opened.
A grand, solemn, pitch-black gate standing in an infinite ocean of blue data.
——Miss M kicked it away with a "bang", looking very impatient, just like when she kicked the main system away before.
-27-
The bags she stored here... hadn't been touched for a long, long time.
If it wasn't to eliminate that strange heartbeat...
Tsk.
-28-
"...Okay, let me look for it. Where is my memory from decades ago in the system world, when Xiao P was still alive?"
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