Chapter 50: Hunting and raising birds are not criticized, but Erfeng is not feeling well
No one went to the Tang Dynasty palace, mainly because Guo Ziyi, Li Guangbi and others were afraid that His Majesty would be attacked and assassinated by those overseas people.
The final result of the discussion was to open up tourism to other areas of Chang'an first, because they needed to assess the overall risk and aggressiveness of overseas people.
Therefore, at this time Li Shimin brought out Guo Ziyi, Li Siye and other imperial guards to observe how overseas people came to travel and visit the Tang Dynasty.
"I've already told you, these guys are terrible, and each one is easy to spot."
Although tourists here wear the same clothes as people in the Tang Dynasty, as long as you see those weird and strange clothes, you can tell they are definitely modern people!
Soon, Li Shimin discovered several modern anglers fishing by the river.
People in the Tang Dynasty just fished for food, but modern anglers throw sacks of fish food into the water, saying that they need to make a nest first.
Li Siye watched from the side and shook his head:
"Are you fishing or feeding the fish?
I really don't understand. What kind of fish food are these? I don't recognize them."
"Oh, this is just a mixture of chicken, corn, potatoes, and wheat hulls, all pressed together like this. Fish love this, so sprinkle more for easier fishing!"
Guo Ziyi: No, fish is better than anything I eat!
After saying this, the modern fisherman chuckled and opened a large sack of fish food weighing at least five or six kilograms and poured it into the river, saying happily as he did so:
"Hehehe, fishing in Datang is still the best!
Look at this fish, it's so big and fat, today's fishing was worth it!"
Only then did Li Shimin realize that these fishermen were fishing here and actually paid the farmers.
It turned out that the farmer discovered that someone had occupied their good fishing spot, and their fields were next to the river.
The farmers were a little unhappy at first and almost had an argument with the modern people, but these modern fishermen gave the family money without saying a word.
"So this is your territory? I get it! Do you rent the stall? By the hour, right?
No, it should be calculated by the hour. Oh, I made a fortune! "
Farmer: ???
In short, since the water in Datang is clear and there is no industrial metal and chemical pollution, there is no need to worry about not being able to eat wild local fish.
So the fisherman called his friends.
Soon, a large group of fishermen gathered on the river bank and paid fishing rent to each farmer.
They even asked the farmers to help them weigh the fish they caught, and then paid the farmers before happily carrying the fish away.
Li Shimin:?
Li Shimin and Guo Ziyi looked at each other, and both saw the surprise and incomprehension in each other's eyes.
At this time, a modern fisherman caught a large carp weighing 17 or 18 kilograms. He was so happy that he picked up the fish, ran around the field three times, and then held it in front of Li Shimin:
"Ahhhhh Erfeng, look! Look, I caught such a big fish!
Oh my god, for the first time in my life, fishing in Datang is really the best! You don’t even need to put too much bait in the nest!
Before Li Shimin could say anything, the other party had already excitedly dragged the fish to the farmer to weigh it for him, and then hung it on a donkey to go to Chang'an and show off to the world.
No, Li Shimin’s charm is not as great as that of a fish?
[Ahahaha, don't be discouraged, Erfeng, this is how fishermen are!]
[Organic and pollution-free wild fish is very expensive nowadays!
I didn’t expect a trip to ancient times to be so cost-effective! I want to go there next time too!
Li Shimin couldn't understand why people thought it was worthwhile to pay for fishing.
The Tang Dynasty imperial guards were also confused and continued to walk and look along with Li Shimin.
"Ahhhh! This is so much fun! We've already paid, let us play for two more hours!"
“Why do I need cows to farm? I can plow the land myself!
I know how to grow potatoes! I've seen videos of this, I'm sure I can do it! "
Soon, Li Shimin discovered three or five young men and women who were studying how to plant potatoes in the fields.
This was originally the manor of the Wei family, who occupied the best irrigation canals and farmland in the suburbs of Chang'an.
However, since many of the Wei family's assets have now been confiscated, these fields have been redistributed to nearby farmers, so the farmland is now individually owned.
The farmers all knew that a group of overseas people were coming to travel, so they discussed it and prepared some food and donkeys so that these people could use them for food and transportation, and they could also make some money.
But I didn’t expect that these people would start farming as soon as they arrived, and they would pay for farming!
Farmers: ???
Is there such a good thing? Is money really falling from the sky?
The two sides quickly reached a deal, and the farmers happily lent their precious cattle to them for farming.
However, overseas people waved their hands and said that it was too cruel to let cows plow the fields. It was not good for cows, and they wanted to do it themselves!
Li Shimin: ...? Why?
Li Shimin, Guo Ziyi and the others stared with wide eyes at this moment, watching the modern people treat themselves like cattle, running around in the fields pulling plows and harrows, and looking very happy...
Li Siye was amazed, Guo Ziyi was stunned, and Li Shimin could not understand.
But in short, the farmers in the Tang Dynasty received money and cultivated the land, while the overseas people paid money and worked without asking for any return, and they seemed very happy?
The same goes for those who pay to visit farmhouses. They are a group of modern people who come to the estate for tourism, pay to pick fruits, and after picking them, they have the farmers weigh them and then pay to buy them.
Farmers don’t have to work hard to pick the fruits and then go to the city to sell them. They can sell the fruits on the spot and they are all very happy.
Last year, when Chang'an was nearly invaded by bandits, the fields were trampled by horses. Who could have imagined that within a year, good people and a lot of money would fall from the sky?
"See, I told you, these modern people are a bunch of idiots!"
Guo Ziyi seemed to understand a little bit what "shadiao" meant.
He sighed and shook his head beside him. Meanwhile, Li Shimin had been discovered by a group of modern people, who gathered around him and shouted to take photos with Er Feng.
"No, you came to the Tang Dynasty just to do this?"
"Oh, Master Erfeng, you don't understand. We modern people like to eat this kind of wild food without any pesticide residue.
For example, the free-range chickens and eggs raised by farmers here are very expensive in our modern times!"
Li Shimin didn't quite understand, but he quickly came up with an idea and said:
"Would you like to go hunting with me?"
Speaking of this, Li Shimin suddenly felt itchy in his heart.
After all, ever since he came here, he has been busy suppressing rebellions and dealing with all kinds of troubles, and has not had time to go out hunting.
"Ahhh! You can actually hunt here! What a great place! Woohoo!
It sounds like fun, but what if we don’t know how to hunt?
"It's okay. I'll give you everything I hunt. I just want to enjoy the fun of hunting!"
After hearing this, Li Shimin seemed to understand why modern people pay for farming and fishing.
These modern people are all divorced from agricultural production, are lazy, don’t know the difference between grains, are as weak as chickens and lack brains, yet they can all grow up to be so lively and energetic?
The days they lead are truly enviable!
Meeting these foreigners for the first time, the Tang people were very hospitable. Guo Ziyi even had the imperial guards bring out several large horses so that they could accompany the emperor on a hunting trip.
As a result, a group of overseas people spent a lot of effort but still found it difficult to even get started.
"Oh my god, your horses are so tall! They're completely different from the ponies I used to ride at scenic spots!"
"I really can ride a horse. I've ridden in Inner Mongolia before! The reason I couldn't get up today was because of my clothes, not me, really!"
"Your horses are not very humane. Unlike the horses and camels in the scenic area, they know to squat and let me get on!"
"Oh shit, this horse is running! How can it stop so fast? Help me! My butt is going to split!"
Li Shimin couldn't bear to watch it, so he rushed over on his horse and rescued the modern man who was almost flying off his horse.
At this time, Guo Ziyi looked at the modern people who failed to ride horses and were bullied by horses. He was completely sure that this group of people were not pretending, but were really weak!
"So how are you going to keep up with me when we go hunting later?"
Li Shimin knew that these modern people must have more powerful means of transportation.
Sure enough, modern people soon took out their standard equipment for independent travel - electric scooters and motorcycles.
"Things like ours are more stable. We eliminated horses a long time ago!"
"That's right, no matter how good your Tang Dynasty horses are, they can't compare to our electric donkeys, which are as fast as lightning!"
Li Shimin was immediately interested when he saw this:
"Okay, then use your electric scooters and motorcycles to compete with my horse and see who's faster."
A group of modern people immediately rubbed their hands, shouted "three, two, one" in unison and then set off.
When Li Shimin saw the motorcycle roaring away, his desire to win suddenly arose, and he immediately rode his horse to catch up.
[A showdown between motorcycles and famous Tang Dynasty horses!]
However, a horse should consume less grass per 100 kilometers than a motorcycle?】
[But for this kind of dirt road, the speed of a motorcycle is easily affected. You can't drive too fast, otherwise it will easily overturn. So you see, Erfeng caught up and passed him!
Come on, modern people, we motorcycles can’t lose! 】
Li Shimin ran faster and faster, and he and the motorcyclist ran away in a flash.
Li Siye was just feeling that this feeling was somewhat familiar, and when he looked up——
Wait, where is His Majesty?
"What are you guys standing there for? Hurry up and chase them!"
The main reason was that Li Shimin rode the best BMW horses, which were very fast and had excellent endurance.
The imperial guards lost the chase and had to come back to report that their emperor was missing.
Li Siye and Guo Ziyi were both dumbfounded.
Then they lost their own emperor. If they tell others about this, they will lose face!
Everyone was anxious. After walking around the mountains and fields for a few times but still couldn't find the person, they quickly dispersed and followed the horse hoof prints to chase the person.
[Ahahahaha, Li Siye finally figured it out. This familiar formula, this familiar feeling!]
[I thought it would be fine if I died in battle, but it turned out that I died even after becoming an emperor.
Guo Ziyi is so annoying hahaha]
Li Shimin didn't care about what others thought. He was competing with the motorcyclists at this time. They ran faster and faster and soon entered the mountains and forests outside Chang'an.
At this moment, the motorcycle's speed was running out and it quickly slowed down. The racer was about to admit defeat when he suddenly screamed:
"Ahhhhhhhhh, what is that? Help, help!"
[Wild boar, a big wild boar!]
Run! If it rushes towards you, you will die!]
When a group of modern people saw the prompt, they immediately rode their electric scooters and rushed back. Some of them panicked and dropped their motorcycles and started to run desperately.
There were also cases where one accidentally tripped over himself and fell down with the car, being crushed by the car and struggling like a turtle, unable to get up for a long time.
At this moment, Li Shimin fired several arrows, hitting the wild boar's vital points.
Then he rode forward and hit the wild boar in the throat with his sword, killing it.
Then, he looked at the modern people struggling on the ground, still screaming in fear, and sighed speechlessly, helping them up one by one:
"It's just a wild boar, why are you so concerned?"
"A wild boar! That's a wild boar!"
“Of course not, I’ve never seen a wild boar in my life!
Oh my god, it's so big! Its fangs are so scary!"
Modern people quickly gathered around, squatting beside the wild boar with shining eyes to observe it, carefully poking at the wild boar's carcass, and then touching it, very curious.
Our Er Feng is so amazing! He can kill a wild boar by himself!
“…”
Although he was praised, Li Shimin was not happy at all.
No, what’s wrong with you modern people? Haven’t you even seen a wild boar?
"I've never seen this before. It seems to be more common only in the mountains and forests around Nanjing, but it's still quite rare in our city!"
Since it was so novel, Li Shimin decided on the spot to take the wild boar's tusks and fur back, dismantle them, and distribute them to these uninformed modern people as tourist souvenirs.
Immediately, he received the support and cheers of all modern people overseas.
"I knew I always had a reason to be a fan of Erfeng!"
"That's right, even if he can't sleep with Erfeng, he really cares about his fans!
Woo woo woo, look at that dog in front, it's nodding too. It must be agreeing with what I'm saying!"
When Li Shimin looked, he saw that the thing in front of him was not a dog, but a wolf!
They were being targeted by these hungry wolves.
Looking at a group of modern people still rolling up their sleeves and discussing whether the thing in front of them was a dog or a wolf, Li Shimin sighed and had to draw his bow and kill all the wolves by himself.
"Wow, it really is a wolf! Are wolves so small?
It looks not much different from a dog!"
"By the way, if I bring back the wolf's fur, will that be illegal?"
A group of modern people followed Li Shimin chattering.
Every time Li Shimin captured a big wild beast, everyone cheered and applauded wildly, which provided him with very high emotional value.
Li Shimin had never been praised so much for hunting, and he was very satisfied.
He also hunted a lot of furry foxes, rabbits and birds. Then everyone stared at him and said:
"The fox is so cute, why did you kill it?
Erfeng, you are so cruel. I don’t love you anymore! "
"Oh my God, Erfeng, you actually killed a bird! You're breaking the law! I'm going to arrest you. You're done!"
Li Shimin: ???
What’s wrong with modern people?
[Hahaha, don’t blame them. Most of the wild animals here are protected animals.
Catching any bird may be illegal here.
Protecting animals is everyone’s responsibility! 】
"Doesn't that mean hunting is illegal?
You guys are protecting these animals, are you also protecting wild beasts?"
[Yes, we even have to protect tigers and bears!
Nowadays, tigers have been forced to hide in deep mountains and forests, and their numbers have become scarce. We can only see tigers in cages at the zoo!
Li Shimin simply couldn't imagine it, and he couldn't quite understand it.
"Then you can't keep tigers either?
I also want to ask if you want to raise a little tiger?"
He likes this furry spotted golden shaded cat the most.
It’s a pity that when he was Emperor Taizong of Tang, no one allowed him to keep a child, and mainly because his wife didn’t like it either.
He has never raised one, but he still misses it.
[Hahaha, I really can't give this to you, but we can talk to the zoo and bring our most well-behaved and adorable "Doubao" over for you to pet!]
[Yes, yes, the tigers we raise are all very well-behaved and fat, just like big cats. It's absolutely okay to pet them!]
Li Shimin was immediately moved.
Just as he was saying this, the imperial guards led by Li Siye finally found Li Shimin. After he breathed a sigh of relief, he immediately knelt on the ground and apologized.
They came to protect the emperor, but accidentally lost him. If this gets out, everyone will report him for being useless, right?
Li Shimin was still a little reluctant to leave, but it was already late, so he had no choice but to go back.
A group of modern people were given wild boar tusks, fur, etc., and they were all very happy. Guo Ziyi sighed when he saw it.
There are places overseas where you have never even seen a wild boar!
In this case, it would not be a bad idea to open a few Tang Palaces to these overseas tourists next time?
The generals agreed, and Li Shimin decided to open the Taiji Palace to modern people for visits in a few days.
The two retired emperors have too much free time, so it’s just right for them to entertain modern people!
[Hahaha, Erfeng, don't worry. Our little mouths are poisoned. We promise to serve them till they're miserable!]
Li Shimin was very satisfied after hearing this. After some entertainment and relaxation, he went back to handle government affairs with great efficiency.
However, the hobby of hunting is like smoking. It may be fine if you quit for a long time, but once you start smoking again, you will start to feel the itch.
So after a few days, Li Shimin couldn't stay idle and went to the Forbidden Garden to hunt. After a few days, he felt that hunting in the Forbidden Garden was not enough, so he went to hunt in the wild outside Chang'an City.
As a result, government affairs have piled up and the processing speed has slowed down.
When Li Shimin came back from hunting this time, he felt very guilty. When he went to court the next day, he was afraid that someone would scold him.
However, when attending court, everyone still reported their work in an orderly manner, and no one cared whether he went hunting or not.
Li Shimin:?
Why does no one confront him or scold him in a sarcastic way?
Li Shimin felt uncomfortable when no one scolded him.
However, perhaps because hunting was too minor an issue, it didn't affect his court sessions. Although Li Shimin felt frustrated, he couldn't get angry.
So, after a few days, Li Shimin said that he particularly liked furry animals and wanted to raise a tiger in the palace!
Someone should say it now, right?
Guo Ziyi thought for a moment and quickly said:
"As for the tiger, it must be raised from a young age. If it grows too big, it could easily injure Your Majesty. I will send someone to find the little tiger right away."
Li Shimin:?
"I want to raise birds! Those falcons! And I want a few more!"
Soon, Li Bai, who also liked birds, stood up and said that this was not a problem. After the court session, he would immediately find a few birds to train and send to the emperor.
Yuan Zai said that ordinary birds would not work, and he must find some rare birds of prey. If that didn't work, he would ask the Hu people to present a few.
Li Shimin: ………It is such a good thing to raise birds and tigers at will?
Li Shimin was secretly happy, but he quickly suppressed his smile and continued to test:
"I think Huaqing Palace is dilapidated and needs to be repaired by craftsmen. The Yongning Canal should also be renovated."
Someone has to say something about this waste of time and money, right?
Soon, after the ministers thought about it, Diwu Qi and Liu Yan came up with a rough plan for repairing the palace and canals and the required silver.
“Your Majesty, are you planning a major renovation or a minor one?
Or should we expand on the existing foundation?”
Li Shimin: ???
Now Li Shimin felt that something was completely wrong.
He couldn't bear it any longer, slammed the table and glared at the officials:
"Are you nobles worthy of the people of this world? I want to build a palace and go hunting, but is there no one among you who can persuade me to do so?"
Civil and military officials:?
Isn't it just hunting? Why do you need to persuade me?
Your Majesty, if you like hunting, then go ahead and do it. It’s better than sleeping with your daughter-in-law.
Wanting to raise birds and tigers is no big deal. It's not like you want to eat lychees every day.
Could it be that the vast Tang Dynasty cannot satisfy your Majesty's little preference?
As for building palaces, it would cost more money and impose more labor service. However, when Li Longji and Li Heng were in power, they would often conscript hundreds of thousands of soldiers to fight wars. Compared to that, this is nothing.
Many of the court officials came from the previous two generations and did not think there was a big problem with what Your Majesty did.
"Your Majesty, raising birds and hunting have not interfered with the affairs of state.
Your Majesty is a wise ruler, so you naturally know your limits."
"Yes, Your Majesty works tirelessly for the sake of the country, and I and your servants have seen it all.
If even a simple matter like raising a hawk cannot satisfy Your Majesty, then we, your subjects, are truly incompetent."
After Yuan Zai finished speaking, Li Bai nodded in agreement.
The sage pacified the world, and as soon as he came to power, he dealt with the eunuchs and treacherous ministers, and also found high-yield crops. He is so powerful and capable, so is there anything wrong with him relaxing and entertaining himself in private?
Li Shimin:?
Why do I feel uncomfortable all over?
[Hahaha, I'm dying of laughter. Erfeng is used to being PUAed by Wei Zheng and the officials of the Zhenguan period.
This group of court officials were frightened by the PUA under Li Longji and Li Heng! A group of pitiful PUA victims who met each other!
[Yes, what good results would come from giving advice to the two emperors before?
More recently, Yan Zhenqing and Li Guangbi advised Li Heng and Li Yu not to use eunuchs, but weren't they both demoted in the end?
[In the past two dynasties, there were too many people who were punished for their words. Everyone was very cautious. Who would dare to scold the emperor for no reason?]
[Hahaha, Erfeng, are you a masochist? You feel uncomfortable if you don't get scolded by Wei Zheng for a day?]
Li Shimin did miss Wei Zheng a little.
He sighed, reflected on his recent excessive hunting behavior, and asked the court officials to actively learn from Wei Zheng's advice.
He said that he would actively accept advice and open up channels for communication like Taizong did, and would never let his subjects be punished for their words.
"No one is perfect, so you should advise me more!
If everyone flatters the emperor, how can I hear the true thoughts of the officials and the people?"
After Li Shimin finished speaking, everyone expressed their willingness to learn and promised to correct their mistakes.
So Li Shimin sat and waited for their memorials and advice.
Soon, more memorials were received that afternoon.
Li Shimin opened Yuan Zai's admonition with satisfaction, and saw that the whole article was full of praise, and at the end he said sadly:
Your Majesty, your only flaw is that you have no flaws. You are truly too perfect! We, your subjects, are jealous!
Li Shimin:?
Li Shimin threw away Yuan Zai's memorial and continued reading. He turned to another memorial, which said that his shortcoming was that there were few women in the harem and no children.
It was suggested that he allow ministers and beautiful girls from noble families to enter the palace for selection to continue his family line.
Before, the Wei family was very powerful. They thought that the queen had not given birth to a child yet, so they secretly prevented other families from presenting beauties to the queen.
But at this time, the Wei family fell, and the aristocratic families and ministers became active. They wanted to take this opportunity to send beauties in their families into the palace. If they could give birth to a prince before the queen, maybe they could have a new queen in the future.
After all, Li Shimin loved his first wife, but that was a story from a long time ago. Li Zhi, Li Longji, and Li Heng, didn’t your Li family all change queens?
[Ahhh, no! Erfeng, you feudal bastard, if you dare to let your wife down, we'll hit you with bricks!]
[Erfeng, you're so shameless! I'm going to stop being a fan and turn against you!]
Although he didn't quite understand, Li Shimin could feel that these modern people were different from the jokes they had made before, and they were really angry and scolding him.
Li Shimin also felt wronged:
"What did I do wrong that you are scolding me like this? How have I ever let Guanyin down?"
[That’s right, please stop scolding me. Erfeng has a hard time too.]
In order to win over the various noble families, he sacrificed himself to be a prostitute for the country, his lips tasted by thousands. How difficult it was!
Li Shimin: ???
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