Chapter 43 Don’t give up on yourself so early, I will always remember you
Gu Weiyi hadn't arrived yet, but Li Wenjing arrived first. Unlike the last time he'd asked her out, Gustav had booked a Chinese restaurant. Li Wenjing glanced at her phone, and a message from Gu Weiyi popped up at the top. As soon as they entered the private room, Gustav greeted her, stood up, and hugged her, as if there were no barriers between them. He remained polite throughout.
While waiting for Gu Weiyi, Gustave told a joke about French cuisine: a chef who only knew how to cook snails and frogs, so he only made these two dishes every day. When a customer got tired of them and wanted to change the menu, he stuffed a frog into a large snail shell, deceiving them that it was the finest ingredient. Before the customer could even put down their knife and fork, the snail leaped away... Frogs and snails again, a hopping snail shell, a few pairs of slippery frog hands, all sticky and liquidy. Li Wenjing felt a little nauseous about this joke and checked her phone for Gu Weiyi's message. Gustave paused and concluded, saying that he would not be eating frogs today.
Li Wenjing didn't really have much to say to Gustav. She replied casually, then glanced at Gu Weiyi's message. There was nothing else to read, so she put her phone down and picked up the menu, waving it around in her hands like a fan. Gustav, however, remained enthusiastic. After the frog joke, he took the initiative to chat with Li Wenjing and expressed concern for her hand injury.
"We have arranged for the injured workers to take time off and provided compensation. Don't you Chinese people want to rest?"
"The dean asked me to rest. That's good. I'll have more time to write the accident report."
"Don't worry about Pierre's work, just focus on your recovery. By the way, I have two cruise tickets, you two can go and have some fun."
Gustav put the ticket on the table. Obviously, he had regarded her as his son's lover. Li Wenjing raised her eyes, wanting to say something but stopping herself. In an instant, she met his eyes, and there seemed to be some light in them. She felt that his care was sincere.
"It's best for Wenjing to rest at home for her injury."
Before Li Wenjing could ask him, Gu Weiyi came in, rejected Gustav on her behalf, and asked the waiter to serve the food.
Gu Weiyi sat next to Li Wenjing, at the table farthest from Gustav, and continued, "I knew everything about Wenjing looking for you last time. I didn't ask her to. In fact, I didn't want to look for you at all, and I didn't want my friend to have anything to do with you. However, I'm not a coward who hides behind others in everything. Our personal problems shouldn't affect her work, and we shouldn't embarrass her."
"Wenjing is an excellent engineer and it's a pleasure to work with her."
"Thank you." Gu Weiyi's tone remained cold. "This meal is my treat. Fortunately, we didn't go to an expensive restaurant. See if there's anything you want to eat. Lady first."
Gu Weiyi asked her, and the two of them discussed the dishes together. Gustav looked at the menu alone and said self-deprecatingly: "Charles, I should go to a better restaurant. It's not easy to have a meal with you."
"Ouais, I've been eating you since you were little, papa."
It was a rare occasion for him to call him dad. Gustav first glanced at Li Wenjing, who also stared at Gu Weiyi. Realizing Gustav's gaze, she turned her head and glanced at him without saying a word. Li Wenjing lowered her head to pour tea, which emitted a floral fragrance that mixed with the smell of oil smoke from the Chinese restaurant. Gu Weiyi coughed twice.
Gustave spoke to him in French, and then added, "Say whatever you want to say."
"It's nothing. My mom has been gone for so long. Did papa tell her family?"
"No."
Gu Weiyi glanced at Li Wenjing. She still said nothing. He continued to ask, "Why?"
"No need." He took a sip of tea and frowned. "This tea tastes weird."
"Chrysanthemum tea is always like this. Want to try another kind of tea?"
"No."
"I told you why, don't ask me again..."
As Gu Weiyi was speaking, Li Wenjing held his hand and said, "Let's eat. Things have come to this."
Gu Weiyi shuddered in disbelief, as if Li Wenjing was now standing with Gustav. He took a deep breath and asked, "Why? Did I tell you everything before I came?"
"No, there's no need for that," said Gustav.
"But her family has the right to know."
"Alai doesn't want to go back. It's no use telling her. Her family might ask me for money, which is troublesome."
Before the two of them could start arguing, Gu Weiyi looked at Li Wenjing again. She nodded slightly and poured him a cup of tea, and he didn't ask any more questions. After dinner, Gustav was very happy. He put his hand on Gu Weiyi's shoulder and asked them to go for another round of drinks. Li Wenjing didn't want to go, and Gu Weiyi also said that she couldn't drink alcohol because of the medicine she took. The two of them said goodbye to him and walked back along the cobblestone road with the sea breeze. In the square, someone was feeding the birds. Pigeons were eating in groups. A solitary seagull was standing nearby and joined in the eating.
Li Wenjing took out the leftover bread from the morning from her bag, tore it into small pieces and fed them to the birds. Gu Weiyi leaned on the railing and asked her, "Do you know why pigeons avoid seagulls?"
"Seagulls steal food? They're not the same kind of bird."
"Because—" Gu Weiyi suddenly opened his mouth wide, "Seagulls eat pigeons."
Then he bit her wrist, pretending to be grinning, his teeth only lightly touching the skin, like a kiss. Li Wenjing scattered all the cookies and pinched the corner of his mouth. A flock of pigeons gathered below, and the two men watched them eat until the birds flew away, then they went out again.
Gu Weiyi held her hand and said, "It's still early, what do you want to do? Watch a movie? Go to the bar?"
"Hey! Didn't you say I can't drink?"
"I lied to him! I just don't want to drink with him. I don't care if it's white wine, red wine, or anise wine. I don't want to drink anything."
"Let's go home. We agreed to help Yu Di pack her luggage."
"I'm the one who does it all," he said, placing his hand under her injured hand. "I'm your worker, and you're just sitting here supervising me. Is it that urgent? When will she fly back?"
"Next Wednesday."
Gu Weiyi sighed, "So fast," and listened to Li Wenjing's explanations of how to arrange the luggage and the flight, and how to send Yu Di to the airport. She talked a lot, but Gu Weiyi just nodded. Li Wenjing wanted to complain about him. He always seemed a little absent-minded about their separation, doing whatever she said. In her heart, he was not unkind, but rather too kind. In kind people, a slight sense of distance can appear cold. When did this feeling arise? Li Wenjing wasn't quite sure. It seemed that the closer she got to him, the more she understood him, the further he distanced herself. He wasn't actually a passionate and romantic person. On the contrary, he could sometimes be unduly cold.
When they reached the corner of the stairs, Gu Weiyi helped her down, holding her hand. He held it tightly, not letting go. Walking hand in hand like this on the street, they were no different from other lovers passing by. She didn't let go of his hand, she just let him hold it. Li Wenjing looked at him. He didn't move any further away. He was always there. She was always confused about him, about herself, and about the relationship between them.
The bandage on her hand was loose, so he tied it up again and tied a bow at the end. Li Wenjing asked him if medical school taught them to tie bandages like this. He said that they didn't teach it in the UK, but maybe in France. After that, they both couldn't help laughing. They walked down the street, the lights from the shops shining on him like moonlight, illuminating his inner thoughts that perhaps even he himself couldn't understand, unable to think rationally. He put his hand on her waist.
Li Wenjing thought for a moment, swallowed her complaints, and explained, "It's not fast, because she hasn't been back for a long time. After all, we don't have any feelings for Africa. We came here to make money. Expatriates can earn more than domestic ones, and it's a good thing to be able to earn money and go back. If she died here, she wouldn't leave anything behind. The valuables and savings would be given to her family, the luggage would be lost, and the ashes would be packed up and taken back... Oh, and the body can't be transported. One person goes out, and one box comes back."
The topic was too heavy, and even though she made a few jokes, the atmosphere still became heavy.
"So you agree with Gustav that it's not necessary?"
"Family relationships are difficult to handle. If her mother still loves her, telling her will only hurt her at her age. If she doesn't love her, there's no need. At least a box can stay in France, where someone will remember her."
Gu Weiyi sighed, "Forget it, let it be."
All deaths in the world are probably like the mermaid's, vanishing like foam, turning into emptiness. Li Wenjing looked at her own hand. The distance between her and death was no greater than the distance between her and the man holding her hand. She sighed, leaned on his arm, and closed her eyes.
"uncomfortable?"
"Well—I'm dizzy from eating. I can't walk anymore."
She closed her eyes as he held her and walked. The world spun around her, and she didn't know where they were. Closing her eyes, she seemed to be able to take in the world more: the sound of the wind, the voices, the footsteps of passersby, his breathing, the crunch of fallen leaves. She felt that this place was no different from where she had lived before; everyone was alive.
"If you hadn't healed me, or if that support frame had been knocked a little sideways, killing both Yu Di and me, what would I have left behind in Africa? Countless people walk the path I've walked every day. My footprints and my voice are still here..." Li Wenjing opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Where are you still here?"
"I'll be here, and I'll always remember you." He cupped his hands around her face and slid past like the wind. "But Africa is Africa. It doesn't remember anyone. It's the cruelest place in the world, but also the most hopeful. Many lives are born and die every day. The soil beneath our feet is organic matter made up of countless lives. There might be a lion or an elephant beneath your feet. The very existence of life is already a miracle. Meeting you is the most hopeful thing in my life. As for the ending—happy? Bad? I think there are many things in this world that humans cannot control."
"Even so, you... no, we, don't give up on yourselves too soon," Li Wenjing said, her eyes sparkling in his. "I will always remember you."
He hugged her, and they stood on the street, motionless, just hugging each other, like two trees entwined together, taking root and sprouting, growing towards the dark blue sky.
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