My name is Zhang Aiai, and I am the younger sister of Zhang Qingguo and Zhang Qinghua.
I was pampered and protected by my family from a young age.
My parents and brothers all dote on me.
So I've always felt that I will continue to live happily like this.
At that time, I only had one worry: how to get my dad to buy me a new hair accessory so I could look even prettier.
Although I don't have a mother, I am still very happy.
Later, my older brother got married, and I heard people in the village talking about it.
It is said that it would be very difficult for the younger sister-in-law to make a living under the older sister-in-law's control.
The sister-in-law and the brother's sister are natural enemies.
At that time, I scoffed at such a statement because Song Lili would never bully me.
I am the princess of my family. My older brother and my older sisters dote on me and always side with me. Even if Song Lili wanted to bully me, it would be impossible.
Song Lili didn't bully me, although the reason wasn't what I thought. However, my life wasn't much different from before; in fact, it became even better.
Because I lacked a mother's guidance, I was somewhat lacking in matters concerning women.
For a period of time, Song Lili played this role.
He taught me how to do housework and even subtly influenced me, teaching me how to communicate with others.
It was around that time that I gradually learned to understand others.
I cannot constantly demand that others give to me.
Unfortunately, I spent too little time with my sister-in-law and didn't learn much from her good qualities before I got married.
Life after marriage is not as comfortable as being at home.
First of all, my husband's family will never pamper me like my own family does; they can't possibly indulge me in everything.
They would urge me to get out of bed, and they would urge me to do laundry and cook.
After countless conflicts, I slowly began to learn how to do housework, how to work in the fields, and how to do farm work.
Only after experiencing it firsthand will you understand that facing the loess soil with your back to the sky is truly not easy.
The reason I was so happy before was all because my father and two older brothers held up the sky for me.
It has allowed me to live a carefree life until now.
So at that time, I was grateful to them.
Unfortunately, the hardships of life wore away my gratitude, and the fact that my family's life was getting better and better also made me gradually lose my original intentions.
My mind began to twist; I started to envy my sister-in-law. I envied that she could live in that house in my place, enjoying the affection of two men.
So I slowly started to look grotesque.
Whenever I go back to my parents' home, I clash with my sister-in-law. Seeing their angry but silent faces makes me feel like I'm still the same person I used to be.
I was still pampered by my father and brothers as I grew up, and I can still do whatever I want and be willful in doing what I want.
However, this situation did not last long, and my life changed once again.
My two older brothers and sister-in-law have been admitted to university, and they are leaving Hongqi Village to study in the capital.
At that time, I was particularly envious, envious that they could leave this poor little village.
And I regret it, I regret not listening to them and studying properly back then.
If I had listened to them, I would be among those going to the capital now.
So I started to feel jealous. I was jealous of how lucky Song Lili was. Why did she get all the good things?
When you feel unbalanced, everything around you will change reflexively.
Gradually, the conflicts between me and my in-laws grew larger and larger.
And my husband, Fang Yaoqing, has become even less patient with me.
The birth of my daughter, Fang Xiaotao, caused my in-laws to no longer treat me well.
They wanted a boy, but I gave birth to a daughter. They wanted a grandson, not a granddaughter.
Under their influence, I even started to dislike my daughter, feeling that it was because of her that I had become so miserable.
I started hitting and scolding her, but even so, Xiao Tao kept following me, as if no matter how I chased her away, she would always be there.
Family conflicts, if left unresolved, will snowball and grow bigger and bigger until finally the snowball bursts, and the family falls apart.
When I took Fang Xiaotao to the capital, that was when this family fell apart.
At that time, I didn't realize any of this. I just wanted to escape this place and go somewhere I could hide from it all.
The first people I thought of were my loving father and brothers, so I went to Ducheng without hesitation.
Because that's my home, my brothers' home is my home.
I stayed in the capital for a while, and my brothers discovered my problem.
They still worry about me as much as before, so whenever they hear that there's a problem at home, they all want to help me solve it.
Later I got divorced, with the support of my father and brothers.
Because Fang Yaoqing is simply not worth my effort.
Xiao Tao and the others couldn't possibly accept her because she was a girl. So in the end, Xiao Tao stayed with me at Brother Du Cheng's house.
I lived with my father and brother.
It was from this moment that I slowly began to come to my senses.
I've come to realize that both romantic and familial relationships require careful nurturing to thrive.
Children are the best gift parents can give, and what I should do is cherish them, not hate or scold them.
I slowly began to change everything about Xiaotao, wanting to mend the relationship between my daughter and me.
Because for the rest of my life, I might have to rely on her for everything.
This is my child. I don't want him to live the life he used to.
To my surprise, my sister-in-law, whom I used to target and berate, was able to put aside her past prejudices and arrange a job for me.
Only then did I realize just how vast the distance between us truly was.
Why is he able to have all these things happily, while I ended up in divorce? It turns out there are reasons for all of this.
I started working hard to support Xiaotao and me.
When I was able to, I moved out of that house and left my father.
Because I want to live alone.
As a married daughter, I don't want to cause trouble for my father and brothers at home because of me.
I'm all grown up now, and I can take care of myself on my own.
I am also able to take good care of my daughter.
My life will get better and better from now on.
I have always firmly believed this, and I have always worked towards it.
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