"Nianbao, you are too impulsive. Mom has always thought you were a very sensible child. If you run to the countryside alone and something happens to you there, how sad will Mom and Dad be?"
"Don't worry, I will find a way to find you a job as soon as possible and bring you back from the countryside. If you have any difficulties, you must write to your parents. If you have a day off, you must come back to see your parents."
…
My mother told me a lot, but my father always looked at me without saying a word, with a very heavy look in his eyes.
I suddenly began to regret it. I was just stubborn and couldn't accept them preaching to me, let alone my father beating me. But that didn't mean I had no feelings for my family.
After my elder brothers and sisters knew that I was going to the countryside, they hurried back and not only stuffed a lot of money in my pocket, but also gave me many instructions.
Finally, after packing up, my dad said to me, "I used some connections to get you and Chen Panpan together. Chen Panpan is counting on our family to send you money, so she won't treat you badly. I can trust her temporarily, but you have to be careful and don't tell her everything. Don't tell anyone that our family is looking for a job for you and wants you to come back. Do you understand?"
I nodded vigorously with tears in my eyes and began to regret going to the countryside, but the matter was done and the people in the Youth League Office would not allow those who had registered to not go to the countryside.
Anyone can be dragged onto the train no matter how hard they try.
Although I am having a great time with my family now, once I get on the train, I completely forget what they said.
After entering the unfamiliar environment, I lost my backbone and just followed Chen Panpan closely, doing whatever she asked me to do.
After we arrived at the village where we were sent to work, we didn't have to work on the first day. We were just allowed to buy some daily necessities and tidy up our own living place. When we had free time, we could go around the village and familiarize ourselves with the environment.
I have hardly done any housework since I was a child. Even my bed was made by Chen Panpan. She said that as long as she was there, she would not let me suffer.
I was so touched at that time, and told her that we would be real sisters from now on. Even though we don’t have the same parents, our relationship is better than those with the same parents.
Maybe this is what I was like when I was young, impulsive, emotional, unable to tolerate harsh words, and only wanting to hear what I wanted to hear.
I agreed to a blind date with Pei Yuanzheng, partly because I had been in the countryside for two months and had fallen ill several times due to excessive fatigue.
Actually, I just don't know how to do it, but I'm trying hard to learn it. I've never asked others to help me, and I've always persevered by gritting my teeth.
But his physical condition is not there, and if he gets sick, what can I do?
Even though I was sick several times in two months, I never avoided working when I was able to. Even if I worked until completely dark, I would never take only four centimeters if I could get five centimeters.
I am willing to endure hardships, but my body won't allow it.
Chen Panpan often advised me to find a local man to marry temporarily, and when I returned to the city in the future, I would bring my husband with me and ask my family to find him a job. In this way, I would not have to suffer now, and my husband and I would have a good life in the future as both working people.
I was not moved by her words and often pulled her aside to say, "Panpan, we should not marry rural people easily. Think about it, if we don't have a common language, no experience of living together, different education levels, and different perceptions, life after marriage will only make us very uncomfortable, not just free from hardship as you think."
On the surface, she agreed with what I said, but in fact, she was constantly helping me find "rural people" who met my requirements according to my conditions.
When she found Pei Yuanzheng's home, she excitedly introduced him to me: "Niannian, I heard that a soldier is going home to visit his family soon. I heard that she graduated from junior high school and has been in the army for several years. She must have received continuing education in the army. Just think about it, it is such an honor for a sent-down youth to marry a soldier. And if you marry him, you won't have to suffer anymore. I've felt sorry for you these past few months. I'm really afraid that you won't be able to bear it anytime soon. Go on a blind date with him. I just want to take a look. I'm not asking you to get married right away."
She spoke so well that I couldn't help but be moved. At that time, I had great admiration for soldiers in my heart.
There is also the idea that my family has instilled in me since I was a child that the People's Liberation Army is very glorious and is the most respectable people.
So I agreed to her without much hesitation.
The first time I saw Pei Yuanzheng, I felt that he met all my imaginations of a soldier: broad shoulders, narrow waist, muscular strength, and a righteous face.
He is the kind of person who makes you feel safe as long as you are around him.
At first sight, I was attracted to him. It seemed like it would be great to marry a man like him in this life.
What happened afterwards seemed to me as if I had been bewitched. Chen Panpan and Pei Yuanzheng's mother said that Pei Yuanzheng had a good impression of me, and if I was also satisfied with him, I could go to their house to discuss the marriage.
How could I, a little girl who knew nothing, know so much? And Chen Panpan said she would always accompany me, so I agreed to go.
When we arrived at their door, Chen Panpan made an excuse that she had a stomachache and wanted to go to the toilet, so she asked Pei Yuanzheng's mother and I to go in first.
I didn't suspect anything and foolishly let myself be led by the nose.
After accomplishing the task with Pei Yuanzheng, I was completely dazed. How come this was so different from what I had imagined and what we had talked about before?
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