Latest Humor Novel

At the start, bad luck struck. Lu Mi, who transmigrated to another world, was directly thrown into a hell-difficulty Abyssal Rift, with only a blank book in his hand.

"The Key of Solomon: As long as the target willingly writes their name in this book, you can obtain their knowledge and abilities." Seeing the monsters filling the abyss, Lu Mi slowly revealed an apologetic yet polite smile.

After a frantic period of leveling up, Lu Mi finally managed to leave the abyss and return to the outside world.

In the New Calendar year 2277, countless dark rifts appeared everywhere, and monsters and demons of all sizes poured out from the abysses behind the rifts. The entire world entered an era of chaos, countless superhumans emerged, and the world consequently fell into madness.

Among the most formidable monsters, there was a particularly unusual group—they were all searching for the owner of a certain book.

"In the abyss, he conquered us, and so we offered him all of ourselves and our names, that he might summon us at any time and use our abilities, knowledge, and power."

"But then he suddenly disappeared—we must find him! We should find him! We will find him!"

"There is only one throne above the sky, and he is the only one qualified to contend for that position! We are his most loyal followers!"

At this moment, Lu Mi was interviewing for his new job at the newly established superhuman guild. The interviewer asked, "What are your thoughts on 'the Dominator of the Four Pillars of Supremacy' and 'the Future Lord of the Abyss' that those monsters speak of?"

Lu Mi replied, "...? Who's that? I finally returned to a comfortable life, and my goal for the rest of my life is to slack off with a steady job and good benefits. Who's adding drama to my life now?!"

After waking up from a graduation celebration hangover, Elio discovered he was seeing double. This illusion caused great inconvenience in his daily life, so he went to Abstergo Hospital for a check-up.

Doctor: You mean you see different colored halos around people?

Elio: More precisely, it's a layer of light that covers them from head to toe, making it impossible for me to see their faces.

Doctor: And the whole world is gray?

Elio: Yes, Doctor, how did you know?

Doctor: This halo, does it have three colors: red, green, and gold?

Elio: Wow, a miracle doctor!

The doctor chuckled and ordered a blood test for him. Elio, who was hesitating whether to go for the blood test, watched as two burly red-clad men suddenly walked through the half-closed door behind the doctor.

Elio: Uh, Doctor, these two—

Doctor: You might not see clearly, so I specially called two security guards to accompany you.

Elio: Doctor, you're truly a good person. But I just wanted to say, they look red. …Wait, Doctor, why are you turning red too?

*Note before reading*: 1. The main text may contain hints of the protagonist's multiple emotional relationships (note: only hints), but they will not be detailed. The main text has a no-CP ending. There will be a special extra chapter for Assassins & Templars.

2. There is a mix of multiple works + timeline alteration. It's okay if you haven't read them; I will annotate necessary details in the author's notes.

3. Original Assassin, Templar, and minor characters will appear.

**By the way, here's a recommendation for my next integrated US/UK fanfiction involving Assassin's Creed, DC, and more~ "[Integrated US/UK] Do You Also Have a Dual Identity?"

Whether as a criminology student or a member of the secret Assassin Brotherhood, Julian believed his investigation in Bludhaven was going smoothly. But no matter what, he still encountered several fuzzy, big, or small problems.

Big problems included the city's superhero, "Nightwing," always mysteriously appearing near his nocturnal activity spots, driving the assassin crazy. Small problems included his dear boyfriend, Officer Grayson, somehow being incredibly busy, always disappearing even during off-duty hours, which was quite suspicious.

Julian would talk to them properly sooner or later. Of course, the assassin would talk to Nightwing, and Julian would talk to Grayson. As a person with a dual identity, Julian always thought he managed his double life very well.

But what Julian didn't know was that his provisional conversation targets were not two, but one. Bludhaven's superhero and star police officer were the same person. He was also racking his brains to maintain his dual identity, and it wouldn't be long before Nightwing discovered that his boyfriend/Bludhaven's newly emerging hooded assassin was the same person.

As for whether they will cordially greet each other with "What a coincidence, you also have a dual identity?" or tacitly come to blows, we do not know. Content tags: US/UK Derivatives, Superheroes, Lighthearted, Formal, Healing. Elio, Alvin, Superheroes, Assassin Brotherhood, Willow, Leopold. Other: Superheroes, Assassins. Tagline: Save the world? Me?

Theme: Finding oneself, loving the world.

After a nightmare, Nan Tao mistakenly believes she is a cannon fodder female supporting character in a novel, destined for a tragic end.

While feeling distressed, she suddenly hears her son's inner voice – her son has actually bound a 'Melon-Eating System'?

Nan Tao's eyes light up. In the entertainment industry, she overhears a documentary director catching his girlfriend cheating with his uncle, a movie queen discovering her son is her husband's and sister's, and a top male star caught by his CP partner secretly married to his manager...

In the upper-class wealthy families, a CEO's daughter catches her girlfriend with her father at her birthday banquet. A Cinderella-type girlfriend returns for revenge, exposing a seemingly loving wealthy couple for double infidelity, and a fake young lady gets pregnant and becomes the true young lady's stepmother but fails to get ahead...

The more melons she eats, Nan Tao discovers that this world is actually a collection of dramatic, cliché novels.

Her elder brother is a domineering CEO in a sweet romance novel, but he's a deeply devoted male supporting character who selflessly gives everything for the innocent female lead. In the end, she steals commercial secrets, leading to his group's bankruptcy, yet he remains deeply devoted.

Her sister-in-law is a pitiable tool in a 'chasing wife crematorium' Danmei novel. Her childhood sweetheart husband is the male lead gong, and in order to beg the shou to change his mind, he turns around and scatters her ashes.

Her mother-in-law is a cannon fodder female supporting character in a 'green tea stepmother' novel, poisoned to death by her best friend with chronic medication, innocently becoming her father-in-law's confidante. She fakes a one-night stand to pretend to be pregnant and then miscarries after trying to marry up.

Just as Nan Tao is engrossed in eating melons, the powerful figures quietly join forces to spoil her rotten!

Her big brother gives her a black card with a limitless spending limit, her sister-in-law constantly showers her with expensive jewelry like a rich patron, and her mother-in-law transfers a large amount of group equity to her...

As Nan Tao frequently appears on hot searches, the entire internet recognizes her as a 'Melon God' like existence.

One day, Nan Tao is photographed passionately kissing a handsome young business genius on the street. The entire internet excitedly gets to eat a 'melon' about Nan Tao herself, spreading the news far and wide.

"Woman, quick, tell me what your relationship is?!" "Screaming! This is the genius business tycoon Yu Zhengyang!!"

That night, the official Weibo of the Global Top 500 Yu Group posts: "My wife." Attached is a photo of their marriage certificate.

Netizens: "This dog food..."

Reading Guide: 1. The writing style is sweet and refreshing, not a strong female lead story. 2. The content of the 'melons' has no real-life prototypes; please do not associate it with reality. 3. The comment section does not accept real-life personal attacks.

Original title: "Abstract Couple"

[Non-traditional marriage first, love later / Cliched tropes for days / Master of verbal sparring / Otaku couple / Comedic duo with mismatched logic / "If you're hungry, I'll tell you to eat sh*t" type of people...]

Tang Ke: Buddies, I caught a禁欲眼镜系omega (ascetic, glasses-wearing omega) on a blind date!

Fu Yu: Her voice is so pleasant.

Tang Ke: Teasing a virgin is everyone's responsibility! But, sorry, I'm not human anymore.

Fu Yu: So it was just talk... well, I was certainly hyped up.

After hooking him without taking responsibility, Tang Ke belike: I don't want to think too much. Can't I just be a mindless zombie? Play is play, jokes are jokes, but don't joke about feelings. I still have to go to work, comrade, I'll always serve the people.

No chance to confess, Fu Yu belike: Thanks for asking, got sand in my eyes.

Realizing she might have feelings for him but too embarrassed to say it directly, Tang Ke belike: Look how white this wall is.

Having completely adapted to her verbal antics and grown accustomed to them, Fu Yu belike: Alright, I'll kiss you later.

[Tsundere, poker-faced programmer x Flamboyant, erratic civil servant]

[Game fanatic who clears levels unconventionally x Heavily infected by vulgar emojis, evil bang-wielder]

[Too many titles to list x We're two of a kind, neither better than the other]

[Pure love man x Stubborn donkey woman]

Reading tips:

1. A short, sweet romance novel without much substance, full of diverse tropes and complex elements; you won't regret buying it.

2. More focused on daily life, a romantic sketch. All in all, it's a happy and congratulatory story of mutual affection.

3. No angst throughout, but there are unfunny dad jokes; keep warm.

4. A childish marriage with some logic, but not much.

5. Featuring working-class life, with elements of struggling laborers.

6. Will add more if I think of anything...

New novel "Desolate Apron" is being drafted in full! Click to collect before you leave (;_;)/~~~

Content tags: Urban, Happy Enemies, Fated Match, Relaxed, Daily Life, Secret Love.

Tang Ke, Fu Yu.

Other: Pre-order "Desolate Apron." If you're interested, please follow!

Brief summary: The abstract couple mixes first, loves later.

Theme: Encounter implies compatibility.

Lu Xun once said, there are two trees in front of his house, one tree is a tree, and the other tree is also a tree. Just like transmigration, one transmigration is transmigration, and two transmigrations are also transmigration.

After getting into a key high school, Liu Shu transmigrated to become an automaton of the Xianzhou Ten-Lord's Division. Then, two years later, she transmigrated to Gotham. Seriously? Right upon arrival, it's already her senior year of high school?

What did all the learning on Xianzhou count for? That I can endure hardship?

At only thirteen years old, when her friend San Huai confided in her about her troubles, she finally understood that this city was Gotham, the Gotham with Batman.

While the young Red Robin was debating whether to confront Batman and expose his identity, she began to think about how to survive in Gotham.

In this city where good people don't live long and villains live for thousands of years, she chose to live for thousands of years. Under her continuous training, San Huai finally—

Became an excellent scientist. "Genius," others called her, and she certainly was. Because if she became a villain, the better she was at fighting, the harder she would be beaten.

To avoid getting beaten less, it was better to use her brain. What a genius idea. The character cards are all my own drawings, so everyone can use them as avatars, as long as they are not used for commercial purposes.

Goal: Gotham University? Moral: Study hard and get into a good university.

In a catastrophic apocalypse, when society completely loses order, the evil in people's hearts will madly grow.

After three years of struggling in the disaster, she had just played a bad hand well and was about to enter a beautiful, happy life when she accidentally, and unwillingly, reincarnated.

So in this life, she wants all the spatial ability and supplies.

The female lead is greedy for money and sex, a drama queen who loves to play tricks on others. While others struggle to survive, she enjoys life. Morality and compassion? She has them, but not much.

She befriends mental patients and does business with "ragged" young ladies. Her ability is very strong, but she uses it in a very down-to-earth way.

She acts wildly when she wants, not being overly constrained. She sleeps when she wants, without letting it hinder her from benefiting herself or using others. She is not a community war god; she will collect some supplies in the early stages of the apocalypse, but won't deliberately collect more later.

The female lead is a lone wolf. Even if she occasionally partners up, it will only be for a short distance.

Synopsis: [Villain Protagonist]

[This is probably a story about the Marines, Pirates, and Revolutionary Army uniting to fight against alien invaders.]

Yare, the captain of the Eternal Night Star Pirate Group, is known as the 'most narcissistic man in the entire universe'. Due to an unexpected electromagnetic storm, the starship he was piloting made an emergency landing on an unmarked resource planet.

This place was terrifyingly backward; the natives didn't even know what a spaceship was, nor did they have any instruments or materials to repair one.

"Then I can only wait for my crew to rescue me," Captain Yare said, beginning his solitary journey.

At the same time, all resting Transponder Snails around the world received a signal, automatically projecting his handsome face.

"Yo, natives of this nameless planet, feel honored! I am Yare, the handsomest star pirate captain in the entire universe. From today onwards, know me, worship me, and follow me! Wah hahaha!"

Initially, everyone's impression of Yare was: a narcissistic lunatic.

After some time: a very handsome and powerful narcissistic lunatic.

Later still: Wow—he really has a space fleet!

Theme: Give these backward bumpkins a taste of technological shock.

Moral: Be brave and fearless.

【Main text completed】

A mutated giant cockroach appeared in the male dormitory, scaring four boys, each averaging 1.8 meters tall, into screaming. Xie Yun saw a small cat lying on his bed, staring intently at the cockroach, and comforted his roommates: "Don't be afraid, I have a cat!"

The four-month-old kitten was then picked up by Xie Yun to catch the cockroach. The kitten cried: "Ahhhhhhh, help, I'm afraid of cockroaches too—"

That noon, Wu Yahua helped an old lady cross the road. The old lady asked Wu Yahua if she had any wishes. Wu Yahua thought about it and said no, but secretly wished she could have intimate contact with Xie Yun.

As a result, that very night, she turned into the cat in Xie Yun's bed, held by Xie Yun's two paws, ordered to catch cockroaches.

Finishing up the epilogue. This novel is extremely high in Nezha content.

A carp spirit × a lotus spirit (not really). Reborn as the only brocade carp in the lotus pond on Mount Qianyuan, I was told that my path to cultivation was not on Mount Qianyuan. At that time, I thought being an ordinary little carp wasn't bad. Until one day, an unexpected whirlpool at the bottom of the lotus pond swept me and a crane into another realm.

I became the River God of Yunshui River. The crane became the Great King Crane of White Tiger Ridge next door. I finally understood that this other realm was the Journey to the West world, and the crane and I had become one of the 81 tribulations.

One day, I really did wait for Tang Sanzang and his disciples, but the scene was a bit awkward. When Zhu Bajie saw a woman bathing in the river, his lust flared up. Just as he was about to take her clothes from the bank, a red sash suddenly flew out and tied him up.

A youth dressed in lotus garments, stepping on his Hot Wheels, stood in mid-air, looking at Zhu Bajie as if he were trash. Seeing my long-unseen little companion, I immediately cried out, "Little Lotus! You finally came to find me! Look, I've already transformed into human form!" I hugged him tightly when he landed, ignoring his slightly stiff body.

However, at that moment, another red sash shot over, attacking the lotus-dressed youth. Everyone's eyes collectively turned to see a youth in red clothes and silver armor, with a gloomy face, reaching out to me. "A-Yu, come here."

When I traveled to another world, my companion, who had returned from the Investiture of the Gods, also came. At the same time, this tribulation also arrived. But was this tribulation truly just one for Tang Sanzang and his disciples?

My seemingly ordinary little carp also seemed to be not so ordinary. This is a first-person narrative, involving mythical legends and my own take on Nezha. After rebirth, Nezha is depicted as an 18-year-old youth, with various personal settings. It cannot withstand scrutiny, please do not associate it with any film or television Nezha images. There is some 'plastic' Sichuan dialect inside, not guaranteed to be authentic.

The female lead, A-Yu, is based on a butterfly koi. She is not a good person in the traditional sense, but she is definitely a good girl. This novel is primarily focused on romance, with basically no serious plot. Anti-theft protection is 50%.

Content tags include: Spiritual Monsters and Strange Events, Deeply in Love, Inspirational, Classical Masterpieces, Relaxing, Mythological Legends. Featuring A-Yu, Nezha (Little Lotus), Nezha (Lotus Lantern version), Nezha (Journey to the West version), and other versions of Nezha. Other keywords: Mythology, Spiritual. One-sentence summary: Carp Spirit x Nezha. Theme: There's nothing wrong with being kind.

"Fortune-telling? What nonsense! If you're so capable, tell me what I did today?" a professional debunking expert said with a look of disdain.

"You entered a small alley salon at 9:03 PM and left at 9:10 PM. As for what happened during that time..."

"Stop! I'm not doing it, damn it!"

...

"Master, my family has been very unlucky recently, please help!"

"My friend, try not to get too agitated when I tell you, but your ancestral grave has been dug up."

...

Observing yin and yang, discerning the five elements, understanding ancient and modern times, knowing life and death.

In an old shop, there is one person and one cat. Yuan Chun leisurely opens the live stream room. "Next fated person, please."